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now just a couple of weeks ago melanie
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sykes posted a video online to open up
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about something very personal which she
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says has helped make sense of herself
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and her life she shared the news that
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she has been diagnosed as autistic at
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the age of 51.
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yesterday after
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after a series of assessments last week
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a report came back to tell me that i am
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autistic
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and it's such a positive
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diagnosis for me because it makes sense
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of my life and i've had to go back and
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look at my life and sort of unpick it
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and and retell it because it has a
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completely different lens using uh
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harry's terminology and there's a sense
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of relief about it
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but there's also a sense of mourning not
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because i don't want to be who i am and
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what i am and that i'm autistic that's
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that's not it it's that i wish i'd known
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sooner so i could have understood
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exactly why things were rolling the way
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they were rolling
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and i'm honestly so so happy to see you
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joining us in the studio to talk more
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about this oh thanks for having me
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honestly it's great when i when i and i
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saw that video for the first time and i
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read all the articles that have written
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about it subsequently it was just
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incredible
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when you heard that diagnosis did it
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feel like the penny had dropped things
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suddenly yeah and they're still dropping
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honestly every day every minute of every
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day i'm starting having realizations
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about all my sensitivities
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but um i'd i'd i've been working with
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harry thompson who is an
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autistic guy who
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um is a speaker he knows everything
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there is to know about it and there he
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is
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and um we were working on a documentary
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about the education system and how it
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doesn't serve autistic people and he he
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was round up mine and we were chatting
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we'd already did on a facetime like two
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weeks before but we were met in the
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flesh and you know 10 minutes in he sort
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of thought i might have an adhd profile
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slash artistic profile based on
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how
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open i am how expressive i am um that my
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ability to to have pick up and drop lots
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of different bits of conversation but
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keep it lateral and stuff like that i
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mean i i've had to message him this
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morning and say remind me what it was
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that you thought i was interested
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because everybody keeps asking me i
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can't remember
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so because it's his idea of what makes
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me autistic i know now what makes me
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autistic and it is the fabric of who i
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am and who i've always been and i think
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i'm great
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[Applause]
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and this has been the big thing for me
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because i'm i'm not here for me i don't
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need the air time i don't care about the
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column inches i've had 25 years of this
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and that's not what what i did it for
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i'm here for everybody
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that has been diagnosed who's a bit
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embarrassed about it who you know i have
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my phone has blown up with mothers of
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teenage girls going i've just shown her
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your video and she's like oh my god
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right it's a good thing and it is a good
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thing because there's it's all the
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positives about someone they call it a
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disorder which needs to get absolutely
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scrapped absolutely because it isn't the
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things i can't do it's the things that i
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can do that make that are my autistic
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sensibilities
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now that you've had this diagnosis is
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there anything in your life that you
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think would be different had you
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realized it earlier um
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well i would have asked for more of what
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i needed especially in this industry
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because there's a lot of sensitivities
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that i was i i sort of
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dealt with because i didn't think i had
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a voice to change anything although i
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did work with lots of different men that
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would change the temporary temperature
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in a studio or change the angle of a of
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a camera so they didn't get a double
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chin and i'm not talking about des
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o'connor here i will not name them
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um but you know the men are able to just
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say i need this i need that and i didn't
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feel like i could because every time i
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might have said potentially things
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didn't feel right people go but you're
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so good at it and the thing is i'm good
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at getting on with it
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because it's part of my nature and you
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adapt i guess yeah yeah
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a little bit like it's all a little bit
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uncomfortable because i'm not stage
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school i'm not yeah yeah so it's always
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been a little bit against the grain the
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fear of the stigma that a lot of people
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kind of hold with anything like that
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whether it's um dyslexia yeah autism
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yeah and like you said it's the most
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positive thing if you look at it from a
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different perspective well yeah and
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that's the whole point is that autistic
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people have a different view of the
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world it doesn't make it not right
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just because people that aren't autistic
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dictate what it is to be normal or what
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is considered a disorder
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i i'm i'm sorry but you know i
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you need to talk to autistic people
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about what autism is not people that you
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want yeah because you can't possibly
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know if you're not it and it's looking
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at it differently isn't it because now
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we talk about neurodiversity yes rather
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than talking about it being a disorder
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because we have to look at the positives
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yes yeah
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everybody's brain and bodies are the
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same and that's a positive thing to be
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celebrated right yeah well i'd say so
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and i think that you know we'll go back
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to say we talk about the education
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system
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you know i and i have a magazine i've
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had an online magazine called the frank
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magazine for two and a half years and i
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set it up and i suddenly was doing
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dealing with 200 pages there i
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[Applause]
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um so yes i was across 200 pages of a
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magazine online and i suddenly realized
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i can look at this thing and see exactly
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what's wrong with the page page after
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page i knew where things should be how
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things should look i do all the
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interviews i edit and i was in my
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element because i wasn't in front of
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anybody i was at my computer just doing
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what i do best which is communicating in
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which interviewing people is my bag it
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always has been because i'm really
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interested in other people and i think
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at school
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if only somebody might have noticed that
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i was a creative somebody might have
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seen that i you know i did love to draw
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i did love english i didn't do very well
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i got two b's in little languages not
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bad i was surprised at that
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really good it's pretty good when for
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somebody like me who doesn't understand
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cryptic i can't do cryptic so i've never
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been good at understanding poetry
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because it's not black and white yeah
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you have to sort of suss out what it
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means and therefore shakespeare oh my
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god yeah well not many get shakespeare
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yeah yeah but you know i know which is
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brilliant but i mean
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if you go into your play if you go and
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see a play
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it totally makes sense but when you read
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it for me when you read it it was when i
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read it i just couldn't process it
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something i was interested in that that
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i read that you said is that um
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women don't get
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tested or diagnosed as quickly as as men
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well you know tino my son um he's 17 now
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and he was diagnosed when he was three
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and i was told that then that girls just
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don't it doesn't get as as seen because
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potentially they they hide it
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well or but i guess what it throws up is
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that question of if you're being tested
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against what how a boy or a male
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presents a certain condition or disease
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like heart disease it looks very
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different to how a woman presents it so
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why are we being looked at
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in the form of man when we are
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completely different animals
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and so we've got to start looking at
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woman and what happens with that woman
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and not even the man is the benchmark
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for the thing it's like no we have to
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change that what a great role model you
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are yeah i mean everyone out there
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darling that's reaching out that is
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thinking you know with with autism you
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know i didn't think that i could be
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someone like mel who's sitting here
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confident and you're giving a
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load of people out there and actually
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that's why i'm here pennington that's
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why i'm here darling you were and we had
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um we had a statement from the national
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autistic society and they said that it's
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brilliant the more and more people in
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the public eye are talking openly about
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autism because it really will impact
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people's lives it will make people get a
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diagnosis yeah and they'll think if you
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can do it then they can yeah and it will
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make sense of things and it's okay to be
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yourself okay
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that that presents itself so yeah and
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for me it's a huge
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honor to have you
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on the panel with me because i just
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think you're an absolute rock star thank
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you