Who is hosting the session?

The session is hosted by Ethan Sawyer with Renee Ferrio answering questions.

What is the main focus of the session?

The focus is on how to stand out in college essays and applications.

What are some key qualities admissions officers look for according to the session?

Key qualities include intellectual curiosity, initiative, and collaboration skills.

What does the session say about writing on common topics?

The session advises to make uncommon connections and use specific, unique details to stand out.

Renee Ferrio is a senior college counselor with nearly 30 years of experience.

Does the video provide information on upcoming courses?

Yes, it mentions courses on personal statements and college application essays.

What is emphasized about starting a college essay?

It's suggested to start with a question that keeps the reader intrigued.

Is there a specific technique recommended for writing activities lists?

Yes, using strong active verbs and showing specific responsibilities is recommended.

How does the session suggest handling the additional information section?

Use it to expand or explain activities and experiences not fully covered elsewhere in the application.

Are there resources provided for writing college essays?

Yes, the session provides resources like a values exercise and additional info guide.

How to Stand Out on Your College Essays This Fall (Webinar Recording)

01:07:56

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KyxbJ4iFfHs

摘要

TLDRIn this session, Ethan Sawyer and Renee Ferrio offer insights into writing standout college essays. They discuss the elements of a successful college application by focusing on demonstrations of intellectual curiosity, initiative, and collaboration. Specific strategies include choosing unique essay topics, making uncommon connections, and using specific language to distinguish oneself. The session provides guidance on crafting the activities list by highlighting responsibilities with active verbs and leveraging the additional information section to elaborate on unique experiences or challenges. Additionally, the speakers introduce upcoming courses designed to aid students in writing personal statements and supplemental essays, offering a pay-what-you-can model. The emphasis is on creating narratives that reveal important personal traits and values, advised through examples and resources like a values exercise and workshops.

心得

🎓 Intellectual curiosity and initiative are key qualities admissions look for.
📝 Starting an essay with a question intrigues the reader.
🔍 Making uncommon connections in essays helps them stand out.
✍️ Use strong active verbs for an effective activities list.
📚 Additional info sections can expand on unique experiences.
🎯 Focus on unique traits and values in essays.
📘 Upcoming courses on personal statements and applications are available.
🗣️ Apply a variety of essay techniques to convey diverse aspects of yourself.
🎥 Use specific examples and narratives to demonstrate personal skills.
💡 Resources like the values exercise help brainstorm essay content.

时间轴

00:00:00 - 00:05:00
This video introduces a workshop on how to make your college essays stand out, featuring Ethan and Renee Ferrario. Ethan outlines the workshop structure, including a review of successful college applications and Renee's role in addressing live questions from participants.
00:05:00 - 00:10:00
Ethan begins by describing the successful application of an international student who applied to Columbia. He highlights a personal statement theme centered on 'home,' showcasing the student's depth and uniqueness. The personal statement began with an interesting narrative about an airport, capturing attention early on.
00:10:00 - 00:15:00
The narrative continues as the student reflects on cultural transitions and finding comfort in her mother's voice, symbolizing 'home.' Ethan points out the student's ability to avoid clichés by using detailed and specific instances, thus highlighting her unique perspective and intellectual curiosity.
00:15:00 - 00:20:00
The student explores what constitutes a home through various experiences, including a food blog and a photojournalism project. Ethan emphasizes the student's initiative and curiosity, noting how she connects with her community and the school where personal connections broaden her sense of belonging.
00:20:00 - 00:25:00
In conclusion, the student's reflection on 'where is home' showcases her creative engagement with the question. The essay's thematic coherence and surprising yet fitting ending illustrate a well-crafted narrative that aligns with Aristotelian storytelling principles.
00:25:00 - 00:30:00
Ethan shifts focus to the student's activities list, stressing the importance of strong, varied verbs and specific achievements. The list reflects leadership, creativity, and a range of interests, showing how these contribute to the student's multifaceted profile.
00:30:00 - 00:35:00
The video transitions to discussing the additional information section in applications. Ethan advises its use for expanding on or explaining activities and circumstances that don't fit elsewhere, like school programs or personal challenges.
00:35:00 - 00:40:00
The segment on supplemental essays outlines how students should tailor their essays, focusing on specific university programs or professors to demonstrate research and genuine interest. Ethan uses Columbia's requirements as an example and emphasizes the point of connecting personal goals with university offerings.
00:40:00 - 00:45:00
Ethan presents an exemplary soccer essay to highlight writing about common topics. The key to standing out lies in making uncommon connections and detailing personal insights. This helps avoid clichés while engaging with a relatable subject like soccer.
00:45:00 - 00:50:00
Common topics, like soccer, can showcase diverse aspects of a student's identity by connecting them to less obvious values and insights, such as geographical interests or cultural connections, fostering a rich exploration of the student's character.
00:50:00 - 00:55:00
In advising on the activities list, Ethan encourages using better verbs and thorough content to effectively cover one's roles and responsibilities. He discusses a strategy for representing skills and values to college admissions.
00:55:00 - 01:00:00
Finally, Ethan explains the relevance of specificity in additional information sections for explaining unconventional experiences or gaps, reiterating its importance in providing context to admissions officers so they fully understand the applicant's background.
01:00:00 - 01:07:56
The session concludes with a brief mention of upcoming courses, encouraging further engagement for those interested in expanding their college application skills. A Q&A session follows, addressing common questions about essay strategies and submission nuances.

显示更多

思维导图

常见问题

Who is hosting the session?
The session is hosted by Ethan Sawyer with Renee Ferrio answering questions.
What is the main focus of the session?
The focus is on how to stand out in college essays and applications.
What are some key qualities admissions officers look for according to the session?
Key qualities include intellectual curiosity, initiative, and collaboration skills.
What does the session say about writing on common topics?
The session advises to make uncommon connections and use specific, unique details to stand out.
Who is Renee Ferrio?
Renee Ferrio is a senior college counselor with nearly 30 years of experience.
Does the video provide information on upcoming courses?
Yes, it mentions courses on personal statements and college application essays.
What is emphasized about starting a college essay?
It's suggested to start with a question that keeps the reader intrigued.
Is there a specific technique recommended for writing activities lists?
Yes, using strong active verbs and showing specific responsibilities is recommended.
How does the session suggest handling the additional information section?
Use it to expand or explain activities and experiences not fully covered elsewhere in the application.
Are there resources provided for writing college essays?
Yes, the session provides resources like a values exercise and additional info guide.

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00:00:02
hey friends welcome y'all this is the
00:00:04
southern Edition of how to stand out on
00:00:06
your college essays this fall which
00:00:08
Rhymes nicely I'm joined today by Renee
00:00:11
ferio whom you'll meet just in a minute
00:00:14
um I uh reached out to Renee because I
00:00:17
was like you know when we run these
00:00:18
sessions I'm I'll be leading the main
00:00:20
content today but it's really awesomely
00:00:21
helpful if we have somebody who's uh
00:00:24
very experienced uh who can and very I
00:00:26
know it's kind of loaded here but
00:00:27
experienced who can answer your
00:00:29
questions live so sometimes it's Tom
00:00:31
doing it today it's Renee Renee will you
00:00:33
do us a favor introduce yourself to the
00:00:35
folks tell us who you are in the ceg
00:00:37
verse yes I will um thank you Ethan my
00:00:39
name is Renee ferrario and I am a senior
00:00:42
college counselor at College SE Guy this
00:00:45
is my fourth year um as a college
00:00:48
counselor working for Ethan and working
00:00:50
with lovely students all over the world
00:00:53
actually um and I have about close to 30
00:00:56
years I'm I'm edging up to 30 years of
00:00:59
experience as a college counselor I
00:01:01
worked in public schools I worked in
00:01:03
Independent Schools and now I'm working
00:01:05
um for Ethan doing this lovely work that
00:01:07
we do so and I was available when Ethan
00:01:11
asked and so I'm glad to jump in here
00:01:13
and answer questions in the Q&A for you
00:01:15
today thanks I'm so glad you're here so
00:01:18
I'll be sharing my screen in just a
00:01:19
minute and delivering sort of like the
00:01:21
main content the bullet points the
00:01:22
things we're covering today I'll get
00:01:24
into in just a second Renee is standing
00:01:26
by waiting to take your calls in the
00:01:28
chat so got if you've got a question
00:01:30
related to or even not related to just
00:01:33
throw it into the Q&A section Rene is
00:01:36
going to be in there typing away and so
00:01:37
we'll be working on kind of two fronts
00:01:39
here sometimes we can get to like 40 or
00:01:41
more questions which is cool so don't be
00:01:43
shy um in terms of the main content what
00:01:46
we're covering today I'm going to start
00:01:47
with looking at a successful college
00:01:49
application successful in at least two
00:01:51
ways one the student got into the school
00:01:53
she wanted to get into and successful
00:01:55
also in the sense that it's revealing
00:01:57
skills qualities values interests
00:02:00
that really show who this student is
00:02:02
what she's going to bring to a community
00:02:03
uh as we're going through that I'm going
00:02:04
to I'm going to highlight two important
00:02:06
qualities that I think admission
00:02:07
officers look for and the qualities that
00:02:09
I'm going to be talking about are not
00:02:11
just me guessing I did a pretty
00:02:14
comprehensive analysis of what colleges
00:02:15
are looking for um this earlier this
00:02:18
year I did a nine-part podcast with Tom
00:02:20
Campbell on what colleges look for um
00:02:23
which you can check out on our podcast
00:02:25
and then I went and looked at a hundred
00:02:27
different school websites I had somebody
00:02:29
help with us but looked at school
00:02:31
websites to analyze what do colleges
00:02:33
admissions look for um had some back and
00:02:36
forth with some folks on our team
00:02:37
including R and we kind of we're like
00:02:39
yeah we arrived at these what we call
00:02:40
these College admission nutrients so
00:02:42
I'll share a little bit about that uh
00:02:44
I'm going to look at an essay that's
00:02:45
that's on a more common topic which in
00:02:47
this case today is soccer how do you
00:02:49
make a soccer essay work well uh we'll
00:02:51
talk about that then I'm going to talk
00:02:53
to you briefly about how to make an
00:02:54
awesome activities list and how to use
00:02:56
that additional information section
00:02:59
which I'll explain more about later but
00:03:01
basically this is a section of the the
00:03:02
common app that allows you to talk about
00:03:05
other sides of yourself so the question
00:03:06
is what what kind of stuff do you put
00:03:08
there so I'll get to that and then I'll
00:03:10
tell you briefly about we've got a
00:03:12
couple awesome courses coming up in
00:03:14
September these are courses that one is
00:03:17
the first one's on per the personal
00:03:18
statement which maybe Diana you could
00:03:19
just share the link to these if you
00:03:21
Diana is our awesome moderator today
00:03:22
thank you Diana who is a star in her own
00:03:24
right but we've got an awesome course on
00:03:26
the personal statement that's coming up
00:03:27
in about a month and then one on the
00:03:30
college application and supplemental
00:03:31
essays so you're today you're kind of
00:03:32
getting a sneak peek of that but it's
00:03:34
everything today is free the courses
00:03:36
also are pay what you can and if you
00:03:38
sign up for the first one you get 50%
00:03:40
off the second one which is cool so more
00:03:42
on that soon and um yeah well I'll get
00:03:45
into that later and then we'll do Q&A
00:03:47
but we'll do Q&A throughout so um let's
00:03:49
here my screen Rene is gonna go into
00:03:51
question answering mode thanks Renee and
00:03:54
um here let me just I'm just going to
00:03:56
share this awesome application with
00:03:58
y'all um so this was a student and I
00:04:01
know I'm not sharing just yet let me
00:04:02
just click
00:04:03
it there we go okay so this is a student
00:04:07
that I worked with it's been a couple
00:04:09
years it's been maybe like three years I
00:04:11
think since I worked with a student and
00:04:14
what the way that I like to work with
00:04:16
students is we we you know do the
00:04:18
brainstorming we get into you know with
00:04:21
my coaches we get into like super
00:04:24
creative mode where we're kind of
00:04:25
looking at what are the different sides
00:04:26
of you and how do they manifest
00:04:28
themselves in the application
00:04:30
we go through the process of you know
00:04:32
drafting figuring out the supplemental
00:04:33
essays and then when we're close to done
00:04:36
we create what's called an almost done
00:04:37
document so you're looking at the almost
00:04:39
done document from this student and
00:04:42
what's included on that document is the
00:04:43
student's personal statement her
00:04:46
activities list her additional
00:04:48
information section and um her
00:04:51
supplemental essays for Columbia this is
00:04:53
the school that she was applying early
00:04:54
decision at it was the essentially the
00:04:56
only school she applied to and she was
00:04:58
an international student which is to say
00:05:00
she was applying from overseas and it's
00:05:03
harder to get into schools you know when
00:05:05
you're when you're applying as an
00:05:06
international student often um uh just
00:05:09
it's very very competitive I'll just put
00:05:10
it that way so I want to walk you
00:05:12
through this and what I think some
00:05:14
different tips that you can apply when
00:05:16
you're looking at writing your own
00:05:18
application so I want to read you
00:05:20
through this personal statement I might
00:05:21
Zoom past a few of the parts just for
00:05:23
the sake of time today and I'll say this
00:05:25
this student had written an initial
00:05:27
draft of her application or personal
00:05:29
statement rather and it was based on her
00:05:31
creativity and how her creativity showed
00:05:33
up in her life in different ways and
00:05:35
then after a couple months of working on
00:05:37
it and she got some feedback from her
00:05:39
counselor she's like I think I can go
00:05:40
deeper here and so we looked at some of
00:05:42
the pieces that she'd been working on in
00:05:43
terms of her creativity and she realized
00:05:46
that there was this common theme of
00:05:48
searching for home so the theme of her
00:05:51
essay you'll see here at the start she
00:05:53
says about a decade ago a teacher asked
00:05:55
me what would be the first thing you'd
00:05:56
include if you were building a City
00:05:58
without hesitation and I said an
00:06:00
airport I grew up traveling between
00:06:03
Shanghai and San Francisco and around
00:06:04
the world but amid the hustle and bustle
00:06:06
the smell of stir fried bok choy and
00:06:08
500m elevators love that detail by the
00:06:10
way and turkeys jostling Along on our
00:06:13
morning walks to Emerald Glenn Park in
00:06:15
Pleasanton California my mother was the
00:06:18
constant I called both China and America
00:06:20
home but felt most at home in her
00:06:24
presence but I left my mother too so
00:06:26
what she's sort of setting up here is
00:06:28
there's a it's kind of what I call it a
00:06:30
narrative opening in the sense that it's
00:06:31
a story but she's raising a question in
00:06:33
her mind and the question is related to
00:06:36
home so she found home I mean her mom
00:06:39
but then she left her mom so the
00:06:40
question in my mind is like okay where's
00:06:42
home she says three years ago I passed
00:06:44
through the familiar Shanghai airport
00:06:46
but to an unfamiliar place the Southwest
00:06:49
High School in San raone California
00:06:51
holding an American passport I arrived
00:06:53
as an international student and often
00:06:55
felt as if I was the other now there's a
00:06:58
common Trope here where students often
00:07:00
write about feeling like they're a third
00:07:02
culture kid not quite this culture not
00:07:04
quite the other I also was a third
00:07:05
culture kid and there is a way of
00:07:07
writing about this that could seem very
00:07:09
common but she avoids some of the common
00:07:11
tropes um and she writes about it with
00:07:13
such specificity in detail and you'll
00:07:15
notice in a second what I mean and she
00:07:17
reveals so many different sides of
00:07:18
herself that I think that's what helps
00:07:19
her stand out here she says that's when
00:07:22
home became my mother's voice I'm going
00:07:24
to just start highlighting instances
00:07:26
where she mentions the word
00:07:27
home though disturbed by inter and
00:07:29
coughs that immediately recognizable
00:07:31
sound remained T remained tender
00:07:33
remained tender and Serene and despite
00:07:35
the unease in my questions about her
00:07:37
chemotherapy I found and find refuge in
00:07:40
her voice the place of comfort and
00:07:42
strength warmth and familiarity so she
00:07:44
lists one of her homes as her mom's
00:07:47
voice and this was a big deal in her
00:07:49
life because her mother had cancer as
00:07:50
you can kind of tell subtly but you know
00:07:52
it's there and this had this kind of
00:07:54
rocked her but she didn't want to write
00:07:56
an essay that was all about dealing with
00:07:57
her mother's illness she wanted to show
00:07:59
up sides of herself so notice the next
00:08:02
paragraph still searching for a sense of
00:08:04
belonging so that's kind of related to
00:08:06
home Beyond those Friday night calls I
00:08:07
began keeping a food blog and it was
00:08:10
called also the foods of home she didn't
00:08:12
know that she was going to make home her
00:08:14
her um her theme for her essay but she
00:08:16
was like oh my gosh you know when we
00:08:18
kind of landed on this theme in my post
00:08:20
she says I described the taste of sweet
00:08:22
and sour pork in hungo ruminating on
00:08:24
Jing Bridge which I walked by with Ling
00:08:27
XI my hidden middle name I wondered if I
00:08:29
found some ancestry in that City soon I
00:08:33
discovered another piece of Home in New
00:08:34
York City's Chelsea Market too while
00:08:36
licking fresh strawberry gelato and
00:08:38
watching the crowds pass by through food
00:08:41
here's another place she found a home I
00:08:43
often felt more connected with people in
00:08:45
places around the world somehow those
00:08:47
sensory experiences the taste smell
00:08:49
texture the look of a morsel and even
00:08:51
the surrounding eror triggered certain
00:08:53
memories and a burst of Rose tinted
00:08:56
Nostalgia now what I love that she's
00:08:58
doing here besides there's some nice
00:08:59
poetic language which is not required to
00:09:01
get into a great school but it's nice
00:09:02
when it's there is she's got lots of
00:09:05
specifics and when I look at these
00:09:07
sentences I go are these sentences that
00:09:09
someone else could have written and
00:09:11
certainly I look at this and I think I
00:09:13
could ask anybody on this call right now
00:09:15
there are 700 of you could any of you
00:09:16
have written this sentence and been
00:09:18
truthful no this is not a sentence that
00:09:20
you could have written because it's
00:09:21
particularly from her
00:09:22
experiences so consider this each
00:09:27
sentence in your application is an
00:09:29
opportunity to either blend in or stand
00:09:32
out you can either blend in and you can
00:09:34
stand out and how do you know if you've
00:09:36
already worked on your application take
00:09:37
a look at your personal statement and
00:09:38
pick sentence number five does it sound
00:09:41
like something someone else could have
00:09:42
written if so it's probably an
00:09:44
opportunity for some revision so you can
00:09:46
get into some of these specifics that'll
00:09:48
help your essay pop
00:09:50
out yet somehow she says something never
00:09:52
felt right so she's raising the question
00:09:54
again of the essay perhaps those
00:09:57
romanticized feelings began to resemble
00:09:59
home home only because I was constantly
00:10:01
moving yearning for home so this is what
00:10:03
the essay is about a yearning for home
00:10:05
and the question in her mind is where
00:10:06
will she find it maybe it was my
00:10:08
eagerness to confirm that home could
00:10:10
reside in the mind that made me see it
00:10:13
everywhere I went but could these
00:10:15
feelings and thoughts truly constitute a
00:10:16
home I love that she's asking big
00:10:19
questions to me this speaks of
00:10:22
intellectual
00:10:23
curiosity um so she's basically saying
00:10:27
you you're getting the sense that she's
00:10:28
a critical thinker
00:10:30
intrigued she says I sought to find a
00:10:32
more concrete connection to the physical
00:10:34
place in which I
00:10:35
lived last year I developed a
00:10:37
photojournalism project aiming to
00:10:38
capture the people and stories of ohigh
00:10:41
to connect myself and my school to
00:10:42
Community School Community to our town I
00:10:45
interviewed the owner of an organic
00:10:46
Family Restaurant enjoying stories about
00:10:48
his favorite purple cauliflower I met
00:10:50
Kate the baker of a gourmet bread shop
00:10:52
and learned about her 8-year-old
00:10:54
daughter's love of fig pudding people
00:10:56
with whom I used to share a quick hello
00:10:58
became the Touchstone of home so these
00:11:00
are now she's finding home and people
00:11:02
that she's meeting surprisingly along
00:11:05
the way I also discovered some residents
00:11:06
didn't exactly see themselves belonging
00:11:08
to our town a mid-50s steel worker
00:11:11
conveyed his struggle understanding
00:11:13
Ohio's upscale hipster culture oel the
00:11:16
adored burrito maker still finds more
00:11:17
Solace is in his original latinx
00:11:20
Community I could relate here's the
00:11:23
conclusion while I can trace connections
00:11:24
to so many places literal and figurative
00:11:27
I too have found it difficult to feel
00:11:29
connected to a permanent place so where
00:11:32
is my home perhaps art can be my
00:11:37
home through photographs and paintings I
00:11:39
perceive and connect with the world
00:11:40
through color light and detail as I work
00:11:43
to reveal my subconscious thoughts and
00:11:45
unadulterated self so there's that theme
00:11:46
of creativity and art making coming back
00:11:49
into her
00:11:50
essay in dance focusing my breath with
00:11:53
others I sink with the Ensemble and
00:11:55
truly own my physical presence so
00:11:58
implication here's another place where
00:11:59
she finds herself at home then again she
00:12:02
says perhaps for me airport really is
00:12:04
the best answer it's the in between
00:12:07
space the crossroads of the world a
00:12:10
Place full of people longing for home
00:12:13
people coming to and going from home
00:12:15
where I seem to
00:12:17
belong while I continue to seek answers
00:12:20
striving to understand my own and others
00:12:23
place in this world you can look for me
00:12:25
at both arrivals and departures
00:12:31
so she's delivered something that to me
00:12:33
a great ending is is it surprising and
00:12:36
inevitable and so it's surprising to me
00:12:39
because she I don't expect her to
00:12:41
basically not answer the question she's
00:12:43
not saying like I found home here in
00:12:45
this concrete place but she kind of is
00:12:47
and she's kind of coming back to the
00:12:48
place where she began which makes this a
00:12:50
little bit inevitable so as you're
00:12:53
thinking about the ending to your
00:12:55
essay is it surprising and inevitable
00:12:58
now I'm not making this these terms up
00:13:00
this is from Aristotle you know when he
00:13:03
talks about a great ending in the in
00:13:05
Poetics this is sort of what can make
00:13:07
for a great ending and it's something to
00:13:08
strive for it it I want to say to youall
00:13:10
again listening this is an incredibly
00:13:12
well-crafted essay she spent a lot of
00:13:14
time on it you don't have to write
00:13:15
something that's well-crafted in order
00:13:17
to get into a great school but when it
00:13:19
comes to standing out a few things to
00:13:21
notice here number one she's asking a
00:13:23
question at the start of the essay
00:13:25
that's a simple thing that you can apply
00:13:27
so number one what question could I ask
00:13:29
at the start of my essay that I could
00:13:31
potentially carry throughout that
00:13:33
intrigues the reader and gets them
00:13:34
wanting to know what comes next
00:13:36
okay second is there some kind of theme
00:13:40
that runs throughout that allows them to
00:13:42
sort of get a sense of different sides
00:13:44
of you so in this case she chose places
00:13:46
where she finds herself at home and even
00:13:48
though she never sort of resides and
00:13:50
like I'm definitely at home here
00:13:51
definitely at home here we get to learn
00:13:52
about her connection to her mom and
00:13:54
family we get to connect learn about her
00:13:56
connection to her writing and her love
00:13:58
of food we also get to learn about her
00:14:00
artmaking self her photojournalism
00:14:03
projects and even she mentions subtly
00:14:05
and briefly here um paintings that she
00:14:08
done does and dance so we're getting a
00:14:11
sense that this is an artist truly an
00:14:12
artist mind at work but it's not an
00:14:15
essay that's just basically recapping
00:14:16
all of her accomplishments because that
00:14:18
she's going to put those in just a
00:14:19
minute in her activities and awards
00:14:21
list another thing that I mentioned so I
00:14:23
mentioned intellectual curiosity is
00:14:25
something that's that's really nice here
00:14:27
that's really clear
00:14:29
I also another quality that's coming
00:14:30
through here that admission officers
00:14:32
love to see is initiative so this isn't
00:14:35
somebody who just has a question and
00:14:37
then just sits back she's taking
00:14:39
initiative to try and find herself she's
00:14:43
taking initiative through this food blog
00:14:44
that she started she's taking initiative
00:14:46
by doing this photojournalism project um
00:14:50
asking lots of big questions so you can
00:14:52
see her leadership in a way and by by
00:14:54
that I mean like her her self leadership
00:14:57
now you'll see later in the application
00:14:58
other in instances of leadership where
00:15:00
she's working with others but I really
00:15:03
like that this is somebody who has
00:15:04
curiosity and then does something about
00:15:06
it so those are like I guess tips three
00:15:09
and four and then finally this sort of
00:15:11
like thinking about your ending is your
00:15:13
ending potentially something that could
00:15:14
be surprising and inevitable something
00:15:17
that gives us both sides of that okay
00:15:21
her activities list so she headed so one
00:15:24
of the things that I love at the start
00:15:25
of this is that she shows her leadership
00:15:27
thing so she's co-head of this captain
00:15:29
of this and then the fact that she was
00:15:31
this should be number three but whatever
00:15:33
um she was selected for this is really
00:15:35
cool if you were chosen to do a
00:15:37
particular role I think it's nice to
00:15:39
include that so if somebody nominated
00:15:41
you and chose you put selected in there
00:15:43
in this case she was selected by the
00:15:45
faculty now I'll get into details of
00:15:48
this in just a little bit but one of the
00:15:49
main things that I'll say and I'll share
00:15:51
with you a resource on this later is
00:15:53
that I think it's good to get strong
00:15:55
active verbs in your activities list
00:15:57
descriptions so notice that she's
00:15:59
organize she coordinates with the school
00:16:02
admin she co-designs all School
00:16:04
diversity workshops and it's a great way
00:16:06
of seeing her in different Realms so
00:16:09
imagine that each one of these is a
00:16:10
photograph we see her organizing the
00:16:13
speaker series so that's one bit of work
00:16:16
probably on a laptop and then she's
00:16:18
coordinating with School administration
00:16:19
we see her talking with you know some of
00:16:21
the adults in her school and then she's
00:16:23
co-designing all School diversity
00:16:25
workshops so that's probably I would
00:16:26
guess some group different group of
00:16:28
folks that she's working work with to do
00:16:29
that so you can kind of think of each of
00:16:31
these as a little snapshot showing you
00:16:34
little mini Montage of like you can see
00:16:35
me doing this see me doing this see me
00:16:37
doing this ideally each one is showing
00:16:39
you doing something slightly different
00:16:42
and then boom in the next activity we're
00:16:44
seeing her at a whole different image of
00:16:45
her she's danced for 15 years separate
00:16:48
from that we see her leading rehearsals
00:16:50
and encouraging new dancers separate
00:16:52
from that she's collaborating with the
00:16:54
teacher to organize different things so
00:16:56
each one of these shows her dancing
00:16:57
maybe on her own leading rehearsals so
00:17:00
we see leadership there and then
00:17:01
separately from that she's again working
00:17:02
with an adult we see the collaborator in
00:17:05
her which is another awesome quality
00:17:07
that colleges love I'm not going to go
00:17:09
through all these activities just now
00:17:11
but just so you can get a sense of what
00:17:12
this student's been up to you don't have
00:17:14
to list all 10 activities it's totally
00:17:16
fine to list five or six in fact the
00:17:18
average student probably does that but
00:17:20
you'll also see some nice range she's
00:17:22
got some photography that she's done she
00:17:24
has a summer program that she
00:17:26
participated in you know and it's fine
00:17:28
to list you know she's applying to
00:17:29
Columbia but she listed that she went to
00:17:30
another school it's totally fine you
00:17:33
don't have to have these on your resume
00:17:34
none of these are like must do there's
00:17:36
no such thing it's like a must do to get
00:17:37
into college but sometimes students ask
00:17:40
can I list a summer program and it's
00:17:41
like yes that is that counts as an
00:17:43
activity tell us what you did you know
00:17:45
in this case she invested investigated
00:17:47
social and cultural issues reflected in
00:17:49
global art developed a Capstone project
00:17:52
on cultural perceptions of Home notice
00:17:54
the theme your application does not have
00:17:56
to have a theme by the way it can
00:17:57
totally be just different things that
00:17:59
you're interested in doing this just
00:18:01
happened to have a a nice
00:18:04
tie-in your activities list is your brag
00:18:07
sheet it's where you put all the things
00:18:09
that you've done let it be your adoring
00:18:11
parent or teacher who just is like and
00:18:14
then they did this and then they did
00:18:15
this and they did this brag here in as
00:18:17
succinct way as you can so that you can
00:18:20
be a little more personal here you can
00:18:22
kind of I like to say show up in jeans
00:18:24
in your personal
00:18:26
statement your additional information
00:18:28
section is an opportunity to discuss
00:18:30
extenuating circumstances so to
00:18:33
explain or to expand on things that you
00:18:36
feel like aren't getting enough air time
00:18:38
so for example Global Studies she's
00:18:40
explaining what that is if I were to
00:18:41
read Global Studies I might be like what
00:18:43
is that on your transcript well this was
00:18:46
an opportunity for her to participate in
00:18:47
all these different kinds of classes in
00:18:48
ninth and 10th grade and then as a
00:18:50
result they organized a showcase and
00:18:52
there was nowhere else really on her
00:18:54
application that she could talk about
00:18:55
that so she's like I'm just going to put
00:18:57
a few bullet points in here doesn't not
00:18:58
to take up a ton of space in fact it's
00:19:00
76 words but boom now I understand what
00:19:02
Global Studies is and
00:19:04
means um she she won some other Awards
00:19:07
so she list those here that's an
00:19:10
expansion food blog here's another
00:19:12
expansion she didn't have room to put
00:19:13
this in her activities list so she says
00:19:15
she's posted 50 entries she's got 300
00:19:18
followers and a few articles had 2,000
00:19:20
plus readers great putting those numbers
00:19:22
in gives us some impact that's an
00:19:25
expand another explain she says you know
00:19:27
she had a family situ situation her
00:19:29
mother's stage four Endo endometrial
00:19:31
cancer impacted her family significantly
00:19:34
and since neither of her parents
00:19:35
experienced any formal us education she
00:19:37
navigated her academics on her own um
00:19:39
and that's great I mean not great I mean
00:19:42
in terms of like on a human level but
00:19:43
it's it's it's enough to give some
00:19:45
mention to some of the challenges that
00:19:47
she went through and what she did to
00:19:49
overcome them including you know
00:19:50
navigating academics on her own um
00:19:53
another thing that was worth explaining
00:19:55
was she didn't want to be well her
00:19:57
school canceled all of her courses so
00:19:59
what she did is she had to self-study
00:20:01
certain courses and take the exam on her
00:20:03
own U and if that's true in your
00:20:06
situation this is the place to explain
00:20:07
it now I know a bunch of questions are
00:20:09
going to come in and Rene is probably
00:20:10
gonna be really busy here in a minute
00:20:11
with like can I put this and can I put
00:20:13
this um and hopefully Rene can get to
00:20:15
your question if not join me on the
00:20:18
course and I'll that's usually one of
00:20:19
the busiest days that we have okay
00:20:23
supplemental essays now these are not
00:20:25
this year's prompts these are last
00:20:27
time's prompts because they've shortened
00:20:28
essay but let me show you a lot of
00:20:30
schools have what's called a y us essay
00:20:31
particularly selective schools and they
00:20:34
essentially ask why do you want to
00:20:35
attend our College University now many
00:20:39
colleges now ask a slightly different
00:20:41
version of it and they ask what are the
00:20:43
skills qualities values you're going to
00:20:44
bring to our community and fortunately
00:20:47
she kind of already did that so this
00:20:48
works for those you know um it still
00:20:51
will give you an idea of what goes in
00:20:52
these essays but one of the things I
00:20:54
want you to look at as you just scan
00:20:55
this essay is notice the capital letters
00:20:59
that are appearing in her essay if I see
00:21:01
capital letters in a Ys essay I know a
00:21:03
student's done their research so you can
00:21:05
see names of courses for example and
00:21:08
names of
00:21:09
professors um I'm not going to read
00:21:11
through the whole thing here but I want
00:21:12
to point out a couple things that the
00:21:13
student's doing well she says I want to
00:21:16
see feel and understand Humanity across
00:21:18
cultures awesome that's like a a
00:21:20
personal mission statement at Columbia
00:21:23
I'd focus on art history while exploring
00:21:24
Urban studies and social justice now she
00:21:26
could very well change her major
00:21:29
and I haven't talked to her in a couple
00:21:30
years it's been maybe a year and a half
00:21:32
I don't know if she actually did change
00:21:33
her major but I wouldn't be surprised um
00:21:36
because so many students Chang their
00:21:37
major but what she's doing in this is
00:21:39
she's making an argument in this essay
00:21:41
for why these would be a great fit for
00:21:43
her she says I believe obtaining a
00:21:45
broader vision of different populations
00:21:47
through Art Is Fundamental to
00:21:49
understanding humanity and can lend
00:21:51
insights into Global issues Colombia
00:21:54
with its unparalleled interactions with
00:21:56
the Arts and cultures of n NYC in the
00:21:58
globe would enable me to do exactly that
00:22:01
now friend of a friend told me Columbia
00:22:04
really likes you to mention New York in
00:22:05
fact um I think other New York schools
00:22:08
do too and so I I recommend if you're
00:22:09
applying to somewhere in New York City
00:22:11
and you're not mentioning something
00:22:12
related to the city they might wonder H
00:22:15
is this student really prepared for New
00:22:16
York City life because as someone who
00:22:18
used to live 20 blocks from New York
00:22:19
City and sorry from from Colombia it's a
00:22:22
it's a particular flavor it's a
00:22:24
particular experience and
00:22:25
so somewhere include New York City at
00:22:28
least a mention I would say if you're
00:22:29
applying to Columbia you know NYU anyway
00:22:32
you know the the New York City Schools
00:22:34
um having produced a research paper on
00:22:36
street art in New York City and curated
00:22:38
a Columbia mural Art EX exhibit uh I'd
00:22:41
be excited to see firsthand the
00:22:42
connections between creative individuals
00:22:43
and their surroundings by attending
00:22:45
latinx artist Coast to Coast learning
00:22:48
from this particular Professor an
00:22:49
activist and curator I delve into how
00:22:51
art encourages marginalized groups
00:22:53
self-expression and activist efforts
00:22:55
okay this is a beautiful yssa 10 one
00:22:59
what are we doing here here's a thing
00:23:00
that I did and I loved it and I got a
00:23:03
lot out of it and I hope to do similar
00:23:05
work in this particular way in this
00:23:07
course or with this professor and if
00:23:09
possible and here's the particular thing
00:23:11
that I'd like to
00:23:12
explore and if you do that several times
00:23:14
in your Ys you're in good shape okay so
00:23:19
again I'm not going to go through all of
00:23:20
these but I think that's something to
00:23:22
just keep in mind uh remember I'm not
00:23:24
going to be sharing these examples out
00:23:25
by the way so if you want to you look at
00:23:28
this you watch the recording later
00:23:31
um Columbia also used to have a y major
00:23:34
essay and the simple version of this is
00:23:37
I want to see a little Montage of what
00:23:38
are the moments that have led you to
00:23:40
discovering ah this is the thing that I
00:23:42
want to do now ideally it's not all
00:23:44
stuff that you did as a child prodigy
00:23:46
you know when you picked up Lego for the
00:23:48
first time and you were like loving to
00:23:50
build things with your hands by the way
00:23:51
Lego is a pretty common Trope so try to
00:23:54
avoid it especially if you're an
00:23:55
engineer or just mention it very very
00:23:56
briefly but what I love about about this
00:23:59
is that she focuses mostly on high
00:24:01
school stuff so sophomore Summer she did
00:24:03
this junior year she did this last
00:24:06
summer she did this whole other thing so
00:24:08
we see these experiences that she's had
00:24:10
in in you know in her high school years
00:24:12
that have really prepared her for this
00:24:13
particular major in this case art
00:24:16
history um I think that's all I want to
00:24:19
say there was there were other like
00:24:20
short answers but you know Columbia
00:24:22
asked you to talk about the books you've
00:24:23
read and the um and the uh you know what
00:24:26
are the whatchamacallit what are the the
00:24:29
sources of media that you consume and
00:24:30
I'd say for those my tips are just you
00:24:32
know be honest and be thorough so don't
00:24:34
leave a lot you know on the on the
00:24:35
Cutting Room floor as it were
00:24:38
okay so that's part one and that took me
00:24:41
about 20 minutes which I expected to
00:24:42
great um and along the way I just want
00:24:45
to recap two of the qualities that I
00:24:46
mentioned I think I mentioned three
00:24:47
actually that College admission officers
00:24:49
are looking for number one intellectual
00:24:50
curiosity and you can see it throughout
00:24:52
her application from the stuff that
00:24:54
she's been exploring in her personal
00:24:55
statement to her activities list the
00:24:57
things she's been involved with to her
00:24:59
supplemental essays where she talks a
00:25:00
little bit more about some of the
00:25:01
projects that she's gotten into the
00:25:04
second one that I mention is initiative
00:25:05
we see her getting involved in stuff
00:25:07
this isn't somebody who just sat back
00:25:08
with her questions she's like working
00:25:10
actively to explore them to pursue them
00:25:12
awesome the third one um is something
00:25:15
like you can call this one collaboration
00:25:18
you could also call this one helping
00:25:19
others because I see both of those in
00:25:20
this application and you could argue
00:25:22
that those are the same or different but
00:25:23
I see her working with others through
00:25:25
some of the ways that she's describing
00:25:27
her activities um and I also see her
00:25:30
helping others you know she's you know
00:25:32
working with younger dancers for example
00:25:35
um you know so there's you know that in
00:25:37
Spades and and then also through some of
00:25:39
the activities that she's been involved
00:25:40
with which are like centered on building
00:25:43
Community um so I'll you know I'm happy
00:25:46
to take questions about that application
00:25:47
if you want at the end um but let me I
00:25:49
want to shift to talking a little bit
00:25:51
about if you don't have something as
00:25:53
sort of specific and Niche to write
00:25:54
about what if you're working with a
00:25:55
common topic as this next student was
00:25:58
how do you stand out well I've often uh
00:26:02
said that if you have a if you want a
00:26:04
boring essay choose a common topic AKA
00:26:09
soccer make common connections you know
00:26:12
soccer has taught me discipline hard
00:26:13
work and perseverance and then use
00:26:16
common language so common language in a
00:26:19
soccer essay might be like you know
00:26:20
Teamwork Makes the Dream work or you
00:26:22
know some version of that but if you're
00:26:25
hoping to stand out with your with your
00:26:27
personal statement
00:26:28
if possible choose an uncommon topic
00:26:31
okay now in this case the exess we
00:26:33
looked at was an example of an uncommon
00:26:35
topic it's the search for home but you
00:26:37
could argue it was a common topic of
00:26:38
someone who well in some ways felt like
00:26:41
she was between cultures and it was
00:26:42
about finding meaning and belonging but
00:26:45
it's the way that she achieved that
00:26:46
she's making some un unex she's making
00:26:49
some unexpected connections connecting
00:26:50
to values we might not expect and
00:26:53
there's lots of language that's uncommon
00:26:54
in other words she's writing sentences
00:26:57
that are particular to her nobody else
00:26:58
could have written some of those
00:26:59
sentences in fact most of
00:27:02
them but what if you are writing about
00:27:04
soccer by the way I don't recommend it
00:27:06
but if you are here's an example of a
00:27:09
really good soccer essay and I'm just
00:27:11
going to read the first couple
00:27:12
paragraphs here just for the sake of
00:27:14
time my room is by far the most worn
00:27:17
down in my house what this is a soccer
00:27:19
essay yeah stay with me broken plastic
00:27:22
trophies from my youth scuff marks on
00:27:25
the freshly painted walls and chipped
00:27:26
blinds that hang by a threat
00:27:28
no I don't have anger issues I just
00:27:30
always have a soccer ball glued to my
00:27:32
feet but my obsession with soccer hasn't
00:27:35
only resulted in a messy room it's also
00:27:37
led me down many valuable and fulfilling
00:27:39
paths okay he's doing that thing he's
00:27:42
raising a question here okay well how is
00:27:45
it that soccer has led you down many
00:27:46
valuable and fulfilling paths what are
00:27:48
they tell me more here we go my interest
00:27:51
in geography
00:27:53
what uh sprouted for my curiosity about
00:27:55
the location of soccer teams around the
00:27:57
world now this is an example to me of an
00:28:00
uncommon connection because never before
00:28:03
have I read a soccer essay that talks
00:28:06
about a love of geography and an
00:28:07
interest in geography but sure enough
00:28:10
here it
00:28:11
is from Germany and France fighting at
00:28:13
each other's throats to Yugoslavia
00:28:15
splitting up into five nations including
00:28:16
Sumit War geography is so much more to
00:28:19
me than countries on a map when I spend
00:28:21
hours taking geography quizes online I'm
00:28:24
not just learning where countries are in
00:28:25
relation to one another I'm also gaining
00:28:27
the contextual background I need to
00:28:29
pursue deeper historical questions oo
00:28:33
Insight okay so here's what's working
00:28:35
well an unexpected connection AKA a
00:28:38
value we didn't see
00:28:39
coming some details about how you've
00:28:42
explored that in this case this
00:28:44
connections between geography and then
00:28:46
connecting it to history but then
00:28:49
there's an Insight the student says I'm
00:28:51
not just learning where countries are in
00:28:52
relationship to one another in relation
00:28:54
to one another I'm gaining the
00:28:56
contextual background any need to pursue
00:28:57
deeper historic questions now if there
00:28:59
was more room the student might go into
00:29:01
detail about what are some of those
00:29:02
deeper historical questions but already
00:29:05
the students going beyond the soccer
00:29:07
taught me about discipline hard work and
00:29:09
perseverance and I'm learning about this
00:29:10
other dimension of
00:29:13
them I think a great topic for your
00:29:16
personal statement is one that is
00:29:17
elastic which is to say stretchy enough
00:29:20
to talk about different sides of you in
00:29:22
this case for example the love of
00:29:25
geography watching soccer fans from
00:29:27
other countries open I to their
00:29:28
contrasting cultures here's the new
00:29:31
value whether it's the cheers they chant
00:29:33
or how they celebrate a win but for me
00:29:35
it's much more personal living in the US
00:29:37
I haven't always felt connected to my
00:29:39
Indian Heritage okay common theme
00:29:41
connect this one to the last essay
00:29:43
however when I traveled to India not
00:29:44
only did I see soccer being played
00:29:45
Barefoot in the poorest streets of
00:29:47
Kolkata I also explored my background
00:29:49
and met family members I'd only heard
00:29:50
stories about I tasted homemade foods
00:29:53
like Luchi that my Tom andu grew up
00:29:55
eating and I witnessed unfamiliar
00:29:57
Customs my Rel take part in like eating
00:29:59
with their hands soccer brought me to
00:30:01
the realization that I've been missing
00:30:02
an important connection to myself one I
00:30:05
look forward to exploring now this is a
00:30:08
great example of not only an Insight
00:30:10
which is like and by an Insight I mean
00:30:12
like give me something that I wouldn't
00:30:13
know from Reading elsewhere in your
00:30:14
application like I don't know that
00:30:16
you're missing this important connection
00:30:17
to yourself I appreciate knowing that
00:30:19
you know and then there's also a little
00:30:22
vulnerability here this student isn't
00:30:25
showing up as like you know I'm fully
00:30:26
made and done this student like yeah
00:30:28
there's like parts of myself that I'm
00:30:30
interested in exploring and what this
00:30:31
shows to me is not like you know I think
00:30:34
one some student might be self-conscious
00:30:36
that they don't feel more or or Shame
00:30:37
about being being not more connected to
00:30:39
their their culture but actually what I
00:30:41
see here is curiosity and openness and
00:30:43
so those are like values that are coming
00:30:45
through here so far this soccer essay
00:30:47
has explored geography and cultures
00:30:51
stoked and we'll do one more a score
00:30:54
line can often be misleading just
00:30:55
because because a team one doesn't mean
00:30:56
they're the better team
00:30:59
statistics such as possession percentage
00:31:01
shots on goal and passes completed are
00:31:04
key indicators of a team's dominance so
00:31:05
now we're talking about soccer and
00:31:07
numbers when soccer revealed how much I
00:31:09
enjoyed data analysis I sought out other
00:31:12
complex subjects you see how this is
00:31:14
each this topic is basically just an
00:31:15
off-ramp to talking about different
00:31:17
things that students interested
00:31:19
in statistics you know AP CM AP Physics
00:31:22
I came to realize I'm an analytical
00:31:23
person and that I subconsciously use
00:31:25
data to inform my daily life for example
00:31:29
I often find myself predicting outcomes
00:31:30
from phosphate concentrations to score
00:31:32
lines now phosphate concentrations is
00:31:35
another example of intellectual
00:31:36
curiosity and you know what I call geeky
00:31:39
language so I love this as an example of
00:31:41
just little little you know hints of
00:31:44
like stuff that I you know nerd out
00:31:46
about but I've also learned there can be
00:31:48
unexpected variables like the power
00:31:50
outage in the Super Bowl or unseen
00:31:52
residue on tools that can lead to
00:31:53
alternate results when I make a wrong
00:31:55
prediction it teaches me there always or
00:31:58
if You' like often un unforeseen factors
00:32:01
just like on a soccer pitch so here
00:32:03
again the student is coming in with a
00:32:05
little insight that helps land the plane
00:32:07
and by land the plane I mean like
00:32:08
there's something here that's like that
00:32:09
aners so what so what can you learn from
00:32:12
this first of all I want to encourage
00:32:14
you especially if you're choosing a
00:32:16
common topic to explore making uncommon
00:32:19
connections which is to say brainstorm
00:32:22
values that we might not expect so I'm
00:32:24
just going to Google values exercise and
00:32:26
I'll share this in the chat
00:32:28
uh if you've been to one of my webinars
00:32:30
before you've probably seen me talk
00:32:31
about this but um with this values
00:32:34
exercise simply put what you can do is
00:32:37
brainstorm the values that you think
00:32:39
might be obvious from your topic so in
00:32:43
soccer what are some of the obvious ones
00:32:45
here you know um you know something like
00:32:49
leadership I'm the one on the team who
00:32:51
likes to call the shots and tell people
00:32:52
where to go um you know I mentioned some
00:32:55
others discipline or finding you know uh
00:32:58
balance because I spend a lot of time
00:32:59
playing soccer but I have to also
00:33:00
balance it with school work that's a
00:33:02
somewhat common
00:33:03
Trope I want to know what is soccer
00:33:05
taught you about I don't know purpose or
00:33:09
what do soccer taught you about the
00:33:10
importance of ritual and how does ritual
00:33:11
show up in your life because I hold that
00:33:14
your topic the thing you're writing
00:33:16
about isn't exactly isn't really your
00:33:18
topic you are your topic you are the
00:33:21
thing you're writing
00:33:22
about your topic quote unquote is just
00:33:25
really an excuse to to share all of
00:33:28
these different beautiful you know
00:33:30
specific sides of yourself so it's kind
00:33:33
of like the topic is you it's how you
00:33:35
have manifested your skills your
00:33:37
qualities your
00:33:38
values um and in some cases if you can
00:33:41
find some common theme then you can not
00:33:43
focus on the theme so make 10% of your
00:33:45
essay soccer make 90% about the skills
00:33:48
qualities values you're going to bring
00:33:49
to a college campus so if you've already
00:33:52
written a draft ask yourself how much of
00:33:53
my essay is about the topic and how much
00:33:56
is in topic quotes because again you're
00:33:58
the topic and how much of it is
00:34:01
currently about the skills qualities
00:34:03
values I'm going to bring to the campus
00:34:04
community and you can you can do that in
00:34:07
green or yellow right now you know Green
00:34:08
for the stuff that's talking about
00:34:10
skills qualities values and then yellow
00:34:11
for the parts that are kind of setting
00:34:13
that up or just talking about something
00:34:14
that maybe isn't giving us a clear sense
00:34:16
of
00:34:17
that okay again I'll welcome questions
00:34:20
at the end
00:34:22
here let me give you some tips on the
00:34:24
activities list and I'm going to give
00:34:26
this through a blog post that I've put
00:34:28
out that I think will be helpful and
00:34:31
I'll put this in the chat as
00:34:33
well here we go so when it comes to
00:34:36
writing your activities list there are
00:34:38
three different exercises that I want to
00:34:40
recommend
00:34:41
um I'm sorry my last link I the values
00:34:45
exercise I sent it only to host and
00:34:47
panelists so let me just I'll share both
00:34:49
of the Links at once okay here we go so
00:34:52
this extracurricular activities guide um
00:34:54
is I think pretty helpful and it's got
00:34:58
there's a YouTube video on this where I
00:34:59
walk through this specifically but the
00:35:01
three main things you can check out the
00:35:03
video if you want look at that I'm
00:35:04
wearing the same shirt I looks like I
00:35:05
only have one shirt longer beard too uh
00:35:09
better verbs and I've got a little guide
00:35:11
in here that's got some better verbs um
00:35:14
more content which is to say I've got a
00:35:17
set of questions that you can ask
00:35:18
yourself that are going to help you to
00:35:19
think through what else did you do what
00:35:22
were your other responsibilities the
00:35:24
other things that you've you know spent
00:35:25
some time thinking about sorry
00:35:28
popups um what are some other things you
00:35:30
spent some time developing thinking
00:35:32
about like what were your
00:35:34
responsibilities when you were involved
00:35:35
with whatever you're involved with and
00:35:38
then skills and values like this is what
00:35:40
colleges are looking for again who are
00:35:42
you I've said this three times already
00:35:43
but who are you going to be on the
00:35:44
college campus um and there's a way that
00:35:46
you can do that I have something called
00:35:47
a value scan that will allow you to sort
00:35:49
of do the X-ray analysis of your
00:35:51
descriptions once you've written them
00:35:54
okay so there's a full guide here with
00:35:56
lots of different stepbystep step um and
00:35:58
I hope you'll find it
00:36:00
useful the other one so I'm just
00:36:02
literally Googling myself College s
00:36:04
additional info College SE guy and I'm
00:36:06
doing that live here with you because I
00:36:07
want to show you that a lot of these
00:36:08
resources if you Google the thing you're
00:36:10
looking for in college SE guy there's
00:36:11
probably something that I've written on
00:36:13
it but for the additional information
00:36:16
section you'll see the section that
00:36:18
basically says is there anything else
00:36:20
you want to share with us you click yes
00:36:22
and then you've got 650 words here okay
00:36:25
and in these 650 words this is where
00:36:27
you're either expanding or explaining if
00:36:29
you like okay so what do you put in here
00:36:33
there are a bunch of different things a
00:36:34
bunch of different examples of this but
00:36:36
this is an example of expanding so if
00:36:38
there's a particular activity that
00:36:39
wouldn't fit in your activities list
00:36:41
great expand selectively you don't need
00:36:44
to put everything in there um you can be
00:36:47
brief focus on the specifics focus on
00:36:50
impact and then don't worry about
00:36:52
special formatting you can just do like
00:36:54
a little hyphen and then write the thing
00:36:56
um
00:36:58
what else what else um what do we let's
00:37:00
see oh yeah this is me and Tom on a
00:37:01
different session walking through this
00:37:03
so anyway I won't go through all that
00:37:05
because you can basically Google it and
00:37:07
and walk through it but again additional
00:37:09
info section for expanding and
00:37:11
explaining expanding on and explaining
00:37:13
anything that you feel like is going to
00:37:15
be and you know we've got I'll put the
00:37:17
maybe Diana you could put the additional
00:37:18
info Link in the chat
00:37:21
um and you'll find lots of examples
00:37:23
there okay we're going to shift to Q&A
00:37:27
and I know that we've had Q&A the whole
00:37:28
time but thanks fene um hope you're
00:37:30
holding up um but let me just tell you a
00:37:33
little bit about I want to show you just
00:37:34
briefly for a couple minutes about these
00:37:37
two courses that I'm leading because I'm
00:37:39
pretty excited about them and I think
00:37:40
they're they're really good um and I'd
00:37:42
love to hang out with y'all more so um
00:37:44
let me walk you through each of these
00:37:46
and I'm just bringing up the link um and
00:37:48
I'll maybe Diana if you wouldn't mind
00:37:49
just throwing in the link so that folks
00:37:50
can see what this ISS so uh essentially
00:37:53
the the purpose of this course is I
00:37:55
wanted to work with more students than
00:37:57
just the small number of students that I
00:37:58
work with or that my team and I work
00:38:00
with each year and the question was how
00:38:02
do I do that in a bigger way for
00:38:04
something that's coste effective um and
00:38:06
from the student side it's for you who
00:38:08
are trying to figure out what do I
00:38:09
figure out how do I know what to write
00:38:10
about how do I know that it's like a
00:38:12
quote unquote good topic that's going to
00:38:13
help you stand out you know how do I
00:38:15
know how to revise like what are the
00:38:17
specific exercises that I use to revise
00:38:20
especially if I don't have somebody
00:38:21
who's like you know helping me through
00:38:22
this process um you know and then how do
00:38:25
you know when you're done that's some of
00:38:26
the other something else we talk about
00:38:28
so what it is is it's a live course that
00:38:30
I lead just like this 90minut sessions
00:38:33
we have four of them and um you'll see
00:38:35
you know we answer up whole bunch of
00:38:37
questions from the specifics of
00:38:39
structure how do you weave your
00:38:40
achievements so it doesn't sound like
00:38:42
you're bragging um what should you not
00:38:44
write about and essentially the sessions
00:38:47
are we've got 11th and 18th and then
00:38:49
October 2nd and 9th so it's coming up in
00:38:51
about a month um focus the focus for for
00:38:54
session one is brainstorming so what
00:38:56
we're doing in that session is basic
00:38:57
basically I'm giving you a bunch of
00:38:58
different exercises for thinking about
00:39:00
your topics um and throughout the course
00:39:03
what I do is I have this thing called
00:39:04
the Choose Your Own Adventure essay tool
00:39:06
where each day is devoted to a different
00:39:09
um each week essentially is devoted to a
00:39:10
different topic so brainstorming is week
00:39:12
one we do outlining and writing in week
00:39:14
two revising is week three and then
00:39:16
refining is week four and this tool here
00:39:19
has tons of different essay examples
00:39:21
just like a bunch that you can check out
00:39:24
that are connected to different styles
00:39:26
of essay so you'll have at least at
00:39:27
least eight different options for
00:39:28
different kinds of essays that you can
00:39:29
write and these eight different kinds of
00:39:31
essays are really malleable in other
00:39:33
words they can become lots of different
00:39:35
pieces um you'll see if you want on the
00:39:37
page there's some like nice stuff that
00:39:39
people have um have said about the
00:39:40
course um but it's it's pretty
00:39:43
comprehensive and my goal here is that
00:39:45
by the end of this month which is to say
00:39:48
ear early to mid October before early uh
00:39:51
essays are due but you've got an essay
00:39:52
that you feel really a personal
00:39:53
statement that you feel really excited
00:39:54
about and um and then if you're like
00:39:58
okay I feel like I've got a personal
00:39:59
statement and because it's not just
00:40:01
about the personal statement we segue
00:40:04
right after actually we run these
00:40:05
concurrently in the in the summer when
00:40:06
we do the summer version we do the
00:40:07
personal statement first and then we do
00:40:09
supplemental essays but what we do for
00:40:11
the fall is essentially we lead the
00:40:13
personal statement course right next to
00:40:15
the supplemental essays course so what
00:40:17
this helps you work on is when you're
00:40:18
trying to figure out how do I up level
00:40:20
that activities list and make sure that
00:40:21
it's really awesome how do I even know
00:40:23
which topics to put in my personal
00:40:25
statement versus in my supplemental
00:40:27
essays how do I work on those
00:40:29
supplements you know they were all
00:40:30
released about a week ago how do I know
00:40:32
you know how do I use how do I find
00:40:34
topics that essentially will work for
00:40:36
lots of different prompts that's one of
00:40:37
the things we focus on early is how do
00:40:39
you write what I call Super essays which
00:40:41
is essays that will work for lots of
00:40:42
different prompts so we'll talk about
00:40:44
structure we'll basically we cover
00:40:46
pretty much all of the major essays the
00:40:48
Y us the Y major the diversity essay the
00:40:51
community essay um and lots more and I
00:40:53
kind of open it up to you know really
00:40:56
any essays that you want to focus on I
00:40:58
do lots of live review again the session
00:41:01
if you sign up for the first one you get
00:41:02
50% off the second one um so yeah
00:41:06
commercial over uh and then if you're
00:41:08
like yeah I I I'm I'm interested in
00:41:10
one-on-one support we do that too um if
00:41:13
you're interested in that
00:41:15
okay 44 pass the hour perfect let's
00:41:18
shift a Q&A um I know Renee has been
00:41:21
actually well let's put that can we put
00:41:23
the other Link in um Diana for the
00:41:26
second course that would be super
00:41:28
awesome actually I think I have it right
00:41:30
here and I'll also put in the link for
00:41:34
folks who are interested in oneon-one a
00:41:37
beat
00:41:39
you will you let for folks who are
00:41:41
interested in in one-on-one will you
00:41:42
throw that link in as well that would be
00:41:44
super awesome actually I have it
00:41:46
here um I think I'm gonna beat you on
00:41:48
this one yep I am okay
00:41:51
cool right I'm totally coming for your
00:41:53
job all right um so
00:41:57
um pausing for just a minute because
00:41:59
actually for some folks they're like I
00:42:02
need time to think of questions so let
00:42:04
me literally have like 30 seconds of air
00:42:06
silence air Silence of Silence of radio
00:42:09
silence is what I meant to say that's it
00:42:11
so that you can think of questions and
00:42:13
then I'm going to let you put them into
00:42:14
the chat um and some of you are like
00:42:17
looking at the course pages so I'll just
00:42:18
pause for half a minute
00:42:45
lovely questions coming
00:42:47
in I'm not going to be able to answer
00:42:49
all 110 but I'm going to get to as many
00:42:51
as I can
00:43:00
okay if Renee idea if you'll start at
00:43:04
the end with the most recent questions
00:43:06
so the ones that came in at like 46
00:43:08
minutes past the hour and go up I will
00:43:10
work from my way down and we'll see if
00:43:12
we can meet in the middle I can't
00:43:13
promise youall that we're going to get
00:43:14
to 110 but now 126 questions but we'll
00:43:18
get to as many as we can okay because I
00:43:20
love to do this I'm going to do this as
00:43:22
a kind of lightning round where rather
00:43:24
than answer like three questions in
00:43:26
depth I'm I'm going to try to get to
00:43:27
like as many as I can in like short
00:43:30
Snippets so I'm going to imagine that
00:43:32
you're firing these off to me quickly
00:43:34
and Diana what I'm GNA ask you to do if
00:43:35
you wouldn't mind is just hit answer
00:43:37
live once I've answered a question all
00:43:39
right here goes what's the best way to
00:43:42
start off a college essay if you Google
00:43:44
start college essay college essay guy
00:43:46
you'll see nine different ways to start
00:43:48
a college essay and it'll give you so
00:43:50
many cool ideas but the simple answer to
00:43:52
this is raise a question in our mind
00:43:54
that will Intrigue us for the entire 650
00:43:56
words
00:43:58
for supplemental essays do colleges
00:44:00
generally prefer storytelling or more
00:44:02
direct approach since the word counts
00:44:03
limited to 25300 words if it's 250 words
00:44:06
I would recommend more direct approach
00:44:08
if it's that short especially for the
00:44:10
University of California personal
00:44:12
Insight questions colleges want a little
00:44:14
more information than poetry they're
00:44:16
trying to determine what are those
00:44:18
qualities that will allow you to you
00:44:20
know what are those qualities that
00:44:21
you're going to be bringing onto your
00:44:22
college campus rather than are you a
00:44:24
good writer okay so I would lean more on
00:44:26
the informational direct approach if you
00:44:28
want to bring a little poetry great but
00:44:30
reside maybe more in here than way over
00:44:33
here how can I effectively balance
00:44:36
personal anecdotes with reflection and
00:44:37
Analysis in my essay uh this is going to
00:44:40
be like a really sort of broad answer
00:44:42
Francis but I would say give personal
00:44:46
anecdotes only in so much as they set up
00:44:48
skills qualities values they bring that
00:44:50
you bring to a college campus so if you
00:44:51
want a ratio one Parts setup and Story
00:44:55
three parts skills qualities values
00:44:58
you're going to bring so ideally all of
00:45:00
the things that you're writing about are
00:45:01
showing what are the skills and
00:45:02
qualities you're going to bring to a
00:45:03
college
00:45:05
campus um is it advisable to reference
00:45:07
another piece of writing in your essay
00:45:09
in order to bring up a point no it's
00:45:10
fine on my personal essay should I focus
00:45:13
on one story or should I bring in a
00:45:15
bunch of different aspects of my life
00:45:16
I'm a fan of going a little bit broader
00:45:19
three to five different sides of you I
00:45:20
think is nice if you do one story it
00:45:23
better be a really good story and you
00:45:24
better have a really amazing insight and
00:45:26
I find that's harder to do well so I'm a
00:45:28
fan of what I call the Montage approach
00:45:29
where you have a common theme but you're
00:45:31
showing different sides of yourself
00:45:32
don't have to do that but I find that
00:45:34
whatever you've gotten that one
00:45:35
paragraph that that whole essay can
00:45:37
probably be squished into a single
00:45:39
paragraph you can probably communicate
00:45:41
that more efficiently and you can
00:45:43
probably show other sides of
00:45:45
yourself how advisable is it to put
00:45:47
questions in the personal statement up
00:45:48
to you usually if there are questions I
00:45:50
want to know what are the specific
00:45:52
questions that you're interested in
00:45:53
exploring or that you have
00:45:55
explored how do you suggest Improv
00:45:57
specificity and creating those big
00:45:58
question intellectual curiosity moments
00:46:00
in your essay um brainstorm what are
00:46:03
some of the big questions that you're
00:46:05
interested in exploring and then maybe
00:46:07
weave them in I don't think I'm an
00:46:09
interesting story what should I do I'm
00:46:10
not sure what to write about how to take
00:46:11
my story make my story compelling join
00:46:13
me in a month on the course um I'd love
00:46:15
to have you if you want the free version
00:46:17
if you Google college essay guy go to
00:46:20
YouTube actually here there's a smash
00:46:23
that like button I feel like I have to
00:46:24
say that every time I talk about YouTube
00:46:25
but if you go to YouTube you go to the
00:46:27
college essay guy Channel college essay
00:46:30
guy seven types personal statement I'm
00:46:32
going to put this link in the chat if
00:46:34
you're looking to brainstorm new ideas
00:46:36
first of all or maybe you've never seen
00:46:37
it sorry do your boy a favor while
00:46:40
you're there hit me up with a quick
00:46:42
subscribe because we got fresh content
00:46:44
delivered on the weekly usually a couple
00:46:46
times a week but for those of you who
00:46:48
are interested in brainstorming
00:46:49
alternate topic ideas check out that
00:46:51
video that's the one that the video that
00:46:53
basically that's the content that starts
00:46:55
the course
00:46:57
I wanted to write a creative personal
00:46:58
statement but I'm not sure how to do it
00:46:59
any advice it starts with the topic
00:47:01
check out the video that I just
00:47:03
linked I'm thinking about forting my
00:47:05
college IEM or the scientific method
00:47:06
because it shows the way I think plus I
00:47:08
want to be an environmental engineer
00:47:09
could this work yep sounds cool try it
00:47:12
if it doesn't work try something else is
00:47:15
it good to write an essay about how I
00:47:16
was bullied for my height and how I
00:47:17
changed myself later maybe I would say
00:47:20
try it um I think often times essays
00:47:22
that are focused on challenges show one
00:47:24
dimension of a student and I really like
00:47:25
to see lots of different sides of you so
00:47:27
I'd love to see that as part of a
00:47:28
montage where I get to see other sides
00:47:29
of
00:47:30
you is an essay about the impact of
00:47:33
support systems on academic achievement
00:47:35
a bad college essay um I don't know if I
00:47:37
would say bad but I think it would be
00:47:38
good if you feel like you didn't have
00:47:40
great support systems put that in your
00:47:41
additional info talk about what you did
00:47:43
what you learned from the experience and
00:47:44
then write your personal statement on
00:47:46
something else because then otherwise I
00:47:47
think it could sound like you're
00:47:49
complaining I'm struggling with
00:47:50
brainstorming what are your tips or
00:47:52
advice check out the YouTube video that
00:47:53
I linked smash that like button well
00:47:56
will it be good to write about problems
00:47:58
I face in a school and later Started
00:48:00
Loving school I want to show how the
00:48:01
problems develop my character maybe I
00:48:04
would that sounds like additional info
00:48:05
you can put challenges effects what I
00:48:07
did what I learned and just answer those
00:48:09
in bullet points in the additional
00:48:10
information section and then you can
00:48:12
write about whatever else you want in
00:48:13
the personal
00:48:14
statement how do you write a u UC Essa
00:48:17
that's the University of California
00:48:18
about overcoming challenges without
00:48:20
sounding too negative it's a matter of
00:48:22
degree if it's 350 Words which it is for
00:48:24
the University of California I would say
00:48:26
devote no more than 75 words to
00:48:29
describing the challenge and the effects
00:48:30
I want to see 150 or 200 words on what
00:48:33
you did about it and another hund or so
00:48:36
words on what you learn through the
00:48:37
experience so challenges and effects
00:48:40
squish them up into the
00:48:41
start what I did about it what I learned
00:48:44
but also ask yourself could these
00:48:45
challenges be something that I could
00:48:46
just briefly mention with what I did
00:48:48
what I learned in the additional
00:48:49
comments section of the uc's because
00:48:51
that could also allow you to free up
00:48:53
space for another UC personal Insight
00:48:55
question he see this person's extra
00:48:57
description doesn't have numbers should
00:48:59
I be more focused on numbers even if
00:49:01
it's not like a huge impact um I would
00:49:04
say put it doesn't have numbers some do
00:49:07
and some don't I would say if the
00:49:08
numbers if they're impressive from your
00:49:10
perspective Tiffany then put them in and
00:49:12
if you're not sure you can just ask
00:49:13
somebody does Raising $100 that sound
00:49:16
impressive you know maybe maybe not so
00:49:18
much is Raising $5,000 impressive yeah
00:49:20
totally so decide if it feels impressive
00:49:23
um or not and then put the numbers in
00:49:27
did she end up getting into Columbia she
00:49:28
did she went there she's graduating soon
00:49:31
I think like next year um and she was
00:49:34
super exatic I forgot to mention that
00:49:36
but yeah um let's see I'm an
00:49:38
international student who homeschooled
00:49:40
for secondary school um most of my like
00:49:44
my my extracurriculars are from primary
00:49:45
and Elementary School I would say just
00:49:47
explain that and you're on a gap year
00:49:49
yeah I would say explain that in your
00:49:51
additional info you're going to probably
00:49:52
use that additional info a lot if you're
00:49:53
a homeschooling student explain all the
00:49:55
extenuating circumstan say what you've
00:49:57
done how homeschooling has you know made
00:50:00
you an awesome learner P human all the
00:50:03
things I would put that you know put
00:50:05
that in your additional
00:50:06
info should you try to fill out all 10
00:50:08
spots in the activities no don't don't
00:50:10
necessarily need to seven or eight is
00:50:11
fine can you put information relating to
00:50:14
your financial circumstances in the
00:50:15
additional info if you want um I would
00:50:18
be interested I'm I'm really curious
00:50:19
could we do a quick PLL Diana I'd be
00:50:21
curious of the students present which
00:50:23
students are domestic which is to say
00:50:24
you're from you live in the US and
00:50:26
you're applying as a as a as a a
00:50:28
national and then which students are
00:50:29
international I'd just be curious to get
00:50:31
a little a little poll uh so we're going
00:50:34
to we'll call we say like IMA so this is
00:50:36
just for students and uh domestic which
00:50:38
is to say from the US or International
00:50:40
let us know in the chat I'm just curious
00:50:41
who's who's here would CMO need to put
00:50:44
an AP explanation um not necessarily no
00:50:47
uh if you if they if it's already on the
00:50:49
school profile that's fine the school
00:50:51
profile is the information that the
00:50:52
school is submitting so that's great I
00:50:55
was weit listed at two schools now I'm
00:50:56
planning to apply Ed and EA what are my
00:50:59
odds don't know without knowing more
00:51:00
about you can you I would say if just
00:51:03
generally your odds of getting into
00:51:04
Wesley and and Williams are not high so
00:51:07
I would just encourage you to expand
00:51:08
your list in a general sense can you
00:51:11
submit different personal statements to
00:51:12
different schools you can so you can
00:51:14
basically if you want thanks for the
00:51:16
poll um you can you can apply to a
00:51:19
school submit the personal statement and
00:51:22
then edit your personal statement write
00:51:24
a whole different personal statement and
00:51:25
submit that to another SCH so that's
00:51:27
fine too um so you can tweak your Comon
00:51:30
app at least you have been able to every
00:51:31
year in the past I haven't looked this
00:51:32
week to make sure that you can do it but
00:51:34
if you're if you're wondering about
00:51:35
anything like that you can message the
00:51:36
Common App their their customer service
00:51:38
is really good um and they'll get back
00:51:40
to you pretty
00:51:42
quick I hear it's not a good idea um to
00:51:46
put some data at the college because
00:51:47
it's something that they've known how
00:51:48
can I mention to avoid a negative
00:51:50
reaction no just connect it back to you
00:51:51
like if you mention a thing about them
00:51:53
just say why it's meaningful to you
00:51:57
um two my let's see if I have several
00:51:58
sides of myself should I try to braid
00:52:00
them all together in the personal
00:52:01
statement or focus on one or two mostly
00:52:04
the sides are political science
00:52:05
engineering and Chinese it's I I don't
00:52:07
know much about you Peter i' I'd have to
00:52:09
take we'd have to go through a whole
00:52:10
brainstorming process to to sort of
00:52:12
figure that out um join the course if
00:52:14
you want I'd love to have you again it's
00:52:16
pay what you can so no Financial barrier
00:52:18
to joining um and I don't but it would
00:52:22
be hard for me to answer that question
00:52:24
any way to review my letters of wreck
00:52:25
through this platform form um what how
00:52:28
wait how are you reviewing your letters
00:52:29
of wreck uh you're not supposed to see
00:52:32
your letters of wreck so um
00:52:35
no you're supposed to sign a thing in
00:52:37
fact that says that you're not able to
00:52:39
see your letters of wreck um can I add a
00:52:41
subject that I self-studied for in the
00:52:43
activity section
00:52:45
yes uh Ethan outlined elaborating on
00:52:47
activities in the additional info
00:52:48
section but USC sent email specifically
00:52:50
indicating to not use a section for more
00:52:52
activities or an explanation of
00:52:53
activities it goes on to say your
00:52:54
activity summary was the perfect place
00:52:56
to highlight your involvement so please
00:52:57
include that info there and not in the
00:52:59
additional information section then do
00:53:00
not do it for USC thank you thank you
00:53:03
for pointing that out that's the first
00:53:04
time I've ever heard of a college saying
00:53:06
that and and now that you said that to
00:53:07
me I'm gonna take I'm gonna make a note
00:53:10
and Diana will you send that to me as a
00:53:11
slack message because I want to include
00:53:14
that specifically in a note in the blog
00:53:17
that's like about how to write the USC
00:53:19
supplemental questions because if USC
00:53:21
specifically doesn't want that then
00:53:22
don't do that great listen to the school
00:53:25
same on another
00:53:27
if the school tells you hey please do
00:53:29
not send additional letters of
00:53:30
recommendation don't do
00:53:33
it I moved to the US two years ago in my
00:53:36
sophomore year now I'm a senior it took
00:53:37
me time to get used to the system here
00:53:39
so I don't really have a lot of
00:53:39
activities put in your additional
00:53:41
info can you put a link on something
00:53:43
you've done in the additional info yes
00:53:45
will they click it uh depends on how you
00:53:47
describe it but they can click links
00:53:50
should I write my additional info that I
00:53:51
studied graduated high school outside
00:53:53
the US and now I'm in New York I'm a US
00:53:54
citizen go for it what are examples of
00:53:57
common topics if you YouTube college
00:53:59
essay guy common topics you'll see a
00:54:01
list there's a YouTube video on
00:54:04
that if you look here so I thought we
00:54:06
were supposed to see something okay how
00:54:07
does one acquire research opportunities
00:54:09
do you just email professors yes if
00:54:11
you're a but if you're getting ready to
00:54:13
apply if you're like a rising senior it
00:54:15
might be a little bit too late uh but if
00:54:17
you're a you know if you're in ninth
00:54:19
10th or 11th grade yes you can ALS you
00:54:21
can do that this is the short
00:54:23
answer um a student I'm advising wants
00:54:26
to know she should include her
00:54:27
activities list in her activities a trip
00:54:28
she took with her school to the
00:54:29
Galapagos Islands another one she'll
00:54:31
take it was a struggle to raise the
00:54:32
funds for these trips I love it when
00:54:33
students include details of the trip so
00:54:36
we you know we worked hard to raise
00:54:38
money for the for the for this I love
00:54:40
when students include those details in
00:54:41
the additional
00:54:42
info do you submit a single personal
00:54:44
statement to all colleges can you change
00:54:46
it um so you can change it you you
00:54:48
submit a single personal statement to
00:54:50
most of the schools that you're applying
00:54:51
to um but in some cases yes you'll be
00:54:54
able to to edit it and I and I would say
00:54:56
write it with that in mind that you're
00:54:57
going to be sending it to multiple
00:55:00
schools can I write Ana about okay
00:55:02
there's are lots of questions about I
00:55:03
want to try to zoom back and find
00:55:05
questions that might reply more
00:55:10
broadly um Ethan said the first thing
00:55:12
you should ask yourself is what question
00:55:13
can I ask that's going to Intrigue
00:55:14
readers to the end of the
00:55:17
essay if we don't do too many activities
00:55:20
how do we write about the five things we
00:55:21
do check out the activities list guide
00:55:23
that I put in the chat it's up there
00:55:24
it's the activities list guide it
00:55:25
applies whether you got one activity
00:55:27
five or
00:55:29
27 what's differ between supplemental
00:55:31
essays and the personal statement so the
00:55:32
personal statement is one essay that
00:55:33
you'll write probably submitted through
00:55:35
the Common App if you're applying to
00:55:36
private schools and it goes to the 10 or
00:55:38
12 schools that you're applying to
00:55:40
supplemental essays are separate essays
00:55:42
that like USC will have a set of
00:55:44
supplemental essays Michigan has its own
00:55:46
essays Stanford has its other essays so
00:55:49
these are all those schools have their
00:55:50
specific essays based on what they're
00:55:52
looking for so USC won't see or USC
00:55:55
won't see m
00:55:57
essays uh cool we got about 80% domestic
00:55:59
students interesting and uh 18%
00:56:02
International students
00:56:05
cool um unexpected connections if my
00:56:08
connections kind of corny or is a
00:56:09
stretch would it be considered
00:56:10
negatively not negatively just more like
00:56:12
neutrally just more like okay cool I
00:56:15
would say if you've already recognized
00:56:17
something that's corny or a stretch I
00:56:18
would say revise
00:56:20
that how do you write a y major essay
00:56:22
when your common app essay talks about
00:56:24
how you decided to choose a particular
00:56:25
major new personal statement idea um
00:56:29
yeah it's hard I mean I guess the short
00:56:31
answer the two ways one is like write
00:56:33
about stuff about your major that is not
00:56:36
in your personal statement and like take
00:56:37
it further and talk about specific
00:56:39
things that you'll maybe include a
00:56:40
little Ys
00:56:42
details but another option is maybe
00:56:44
write a second personal statement that
00:56:46
goes specifically for that school and
00:56:48
then take what you put in the personal
00:56:49
statement and use that for the Y major
00:56:51
maybe a short version of
00:56:53
it which prompt is the personal
00:56:55
statement following topic of your choice
00:56:57
my favorite one so colleges don't care
00:56:59
too much about which common app like
00:57:01
there's not like a better or worse
00:57:03
Common App prompt prompt one is really
00:57:05
broad really open-ended you know
00:57:07
describe some tell us something about
00:57:09
you basically about what's shaped you so
00:57:11
usually the essays that you'll see on on
00:57:13
the blog and in these sessions will
00:57:15
either be about you know prompt response
00:57:18
to prompt one or prompt
00:57:20
seven can I add multiple stories under
00:57:22
one theme yes if you keep it short
00:57:25
usually they're probably not stories but
00:57:27
they're usually instances or examples of
00:57:29
whatever the topic or the common thing
00:57:31
is so but it's like for example I
00:57:33
wouldn't necessarily do a montage of
00:57:35
like times I've overcome challenges
00:57:36
because I think it would be it's just
00:57:38
harder to do have the whole Arc of the
00:57:40
story in like a single
00:57:42
paragraph can you write essays that
00:57:44
focus on one anecdote in a specific
00:57:46
lesson for sure I notic most these
00:57:48
essays touch on various parts of the
00:57:49
students life it's just the reason I
00:57:51
think that that's difficult to do is
00:57:52
that I think you kind of put all your
00:57:53
eggs in the one anecdote and if the
00:57:55
readers only kind of interested in that
00:57:57
anecdote or only the Insight is only
00:57:59
kind of surprising or
00:58:01
unexpected it's it's possible to do well
00:58:03
I think it's just harder to do well and
00:58:05
I think this what I'm proposing this
00:58:06
Montage approach is just a bit more
00:58:08
conservative because if the third
00:58:09
paragraph doesn't work out it's okay
00:58:11
maybe the fourth paragraph can pick up
00:58:12
the slack so I think it puts a little
00:58:14
bit less pressure on you as a writer to
00:58:16
like find the perfect story or find the
00:58:18
perfect moment that reveals the perfect
00:58:19
Insight it's a little bit more like well
00:58:21
here's a here are a variety of things I
00:58:23
also want to confess my bias that I'm a
00:58:26
a buffet guy like when I go to a buffet
00:58:28
I want to try a little bit of everything
00:58:30
um so that's kind of like a personal
00:58:32
bias and preference that I
00:58:33
bring but I've also just seen students
00:58:36
struggle with like I don't know if this
00:58:37
is my story you know and I'm like well
00:58:39
if you think of your story as more
00:58:41
broadly being like different instances
00:58:43
experiences that have helped shape who
00:58:44
you are I think bringing in a variety of
00:58:47
those sides of yourself can be a really
00:58:48
great way to get to know you in a bigger
00:58:50
sense I know we're at time I'm going to
00:58:52
stay for a few more minutes Renee may
00:58:54
drop off because you know it's 8:00 now
00:58:57
in the east coast but um but I'll stay
00:58:59
for a few more minutes I want to say
00:59:01
again I I hope to see some of you all on
00:59:02
the course if you're interested and um
00:59:04
you know feel free to reach out to us
00:59:06
you've got all the links in the chat and
00:59:07
please like stay in touch with us we're
00:59:09
going to be doing more sessions in the
00:59:11
coming weeks and months um kind of you
00:59:12
know going along through this process
00:59:14
and um love to hang out some more okay
00:59:17
I'm gonna do let's do like maybe five
00:59:19
more minutes um Rene when you got to go
00:59:20
feel free to go
00:59:23
okay um is Crea a club at a school a
00:59:26
common essay topic absolutely yeah I
00:59:28
wouldn't necessarily Focus your personal
00:59:31
statement on an extracurricular activity
00:59:34
because a lot of that can be put in the
00:59:35
supplemental essays or it's going to
00:59:36
show up in your activities
00:59:38
list um so yeah so and it's and it's
00:59:41
just harder to stand out with like I
00:59:43
created this club and here's what it did
00:59:45
it's also I feel
00:59:49
like it's
00:59:52
just I'm interested again in sort of
00:59:54
getting to know these different sides of
00:59:56
you now if that club let's say Debate
00:59:58
Club is a if you feel like a powerful
01:00:00
way to show different skills qualities
01:00:02
and values that you'll bring to the
01:00:04
college campus sure great go for it I've
01:00:06
seen students do it well um I'll give
01:00:09
you an example there's the hiking Club
01:00:12
essay uh that this student is writing
01:00:14
about a common topic which is like Boy
01:00:17
Scouts and by writing about Boy Scouts
01:00:20
he does it in an uncommon way if you
01:00:22
search I'll put this in the chat but if
01:00:23
you search hiking on this um on this
01:00:27
blog that I'm putting um you'll see that
01:00:29
he's basically combining the club Boy
01:00:33
Scouts with something that doesn't
01:00:35
always go with Boy Scouts in this case
01:00:36
like history so he's making some like a
01:00:39
like he's sort of combining two things
01:00:41
and that kind of helps it to stand out
01:00:43
but then the other thing that he's
01:00:44
bringing in is that he says at the end
01:00:45
of this essay when I'm hiking and he
01:00:48
talks about hiking with Boy Scouts I'm
01:00:49
not just a hiker and he lists three
01:00:51
different identities that he has
01:00:53
developed and been able to express
01:00:55
through Boy Scouts through hiking and
01:00:58
that to me is like chef's kiss that I
01:01:00
mean because I'm learning I want to
01:01:01
learn about your identities I want to
01:01:02
learn about the different sides of you
01:01:04
I'm less interested in like your Eagle
01:01:06
Scout project cool that you did an Eagle
01:01:08
Scout project but put that on your
01:01:09
activities list and the hours you spent
01:01:12
and then for everybody but USC like you
01:01:14
know if you feel like there's more stuff
01:01:16
there to expand on great um I'll be I'm
01:01:19
glad that someone share that because
01:01:20
I'll be interested to see if if more
01:01:22
schools ask for that I think the reason
01:01:23
they're probably doing that is it's an
01:01:25
Equity issue and they feel like um you
01:01:29
know students who are you know getting
01:01:32
support on their applications or maybe
01:01:33
using the additional info more that's
01:01:34
why I'm trying to put that the free info
01:01:36
for all the students um and make it you
01:01:40
know put the info out there but you know
01:01:41
actually we might we might put in the
01:01:43
additional info section A list of
01:01:44
schools that do not want that and and if
01:01:46
if you have if others have heard of
01:01:48
schools that ask you not to do that
01:01:50
their additional info email us at help
01:01:52
coles.com and um Diana will you Slack
01:01:55
because I'd like to also include in the
01:01:57
additional info like schools maybe a
01:01:59
including now USC schools that don't
01:02:01
like to see that in the additional
01:02:04
info um let's see can you write about
01:02:08
activities that don't necessarily count
01:02:10
as an extracurricular like the
01:02:11
activities you don't list in the Comon
01:02:13
app yeah for sure you can also if you
01:02:15
Google activities that count college
01:02:17
essay guy you'll see a list of
01:02:18
unconventional activities that you can
01:02:20
also put on your um activities list that
01:02:23
students don't often think about um
01:02:28
let's
01:02:32
see if you're writing with a thematic
01:02:34
thread you have to talk about each topic
01:02:35
with the same depth I mean do your best
01:02:37
to do it Francis like it's hard to go if
01:02:40
you're going broad with this Montage
01:02:41
it's hard to go deep with in just a
01:02:43
paragraph um but you'll notice and if
01:02:45
you just Google s sample essays College
01:02:48
Essa you'll see lots of students using
01:02:49
this Montage format and going somewhat
01:02:52
deep in a few different ways so it's
01:02:55
hard to say that in sort of General but
01:02:57
I would say uh to think back to the
01:02:59
soccer essay that I went over there's
01:03:01
some depth but it's not a ton of depth
01:03:03
when the student is writing about how
01:03:05
soccer has connected their love of
01:03:07
geography and their interest in history
01:03:09
it doesn't go into like what are those
01:03:11
historical questions because it's moving
01:03:12
on to the other side and that's one of
01:03:14
like the other side of themselves which
01:03:15
is like connecting to culture or really
01:03:17
not connecting to culture and realizing
01:03:18
that and then statistics so the downside
01:03:21
of doing this jumping around is that we
01:03:24
don't maybe get as much depth or EXP
01:03:25
ation so if you're more like a depth
01:03:27
person and you're like I want to just
01:03:28
focus on one particular thing great go
01:03:31
for it and if you've got something that
01:03:33
you feel like you can write about
01:03:34
awesome um but and and I've seen
01:03:38
students do this with like so there's
01:03:39
there's a student if you watch there's
01:03:40
another YouTube video on food that I put
01:03:43
out that's like um talking about how
01:03:46
this student has how food has helped
01:03:47
them learn different lessons in their
01:03:49
life you know it's arguable whether it's
01:03:52
like well did he explore that in depth
01:03:53
well he definitely is exploring food in
01:03:55
depth because it's effective him and you
01:03:57
know his what he his extracurricular
01:03:59
activities in lots of different ways but
01:04:01
in terms of the different sides of
01:04:02
himself like he only devotes a paragraph
01:04:04
to each one so that's an example maybe
01:04:07
sort of like a hybrid example where it
01:04:08
is actually choosing just one thing but
01:04:11
it's exploring the the different ways
01:04:13
that that thing has like what what
01:04:16
that's brought out of him lessons he's
01:04:17
learned um
01:04:20
yeah can you develop a very beautiful
01:04:22
inviting essay without winning main
01:04:24
Awards you're getting a to rank in a
01:04:25
competition I the universities look at
01:04:27
this majorly no um I I wouldn't say that
01:04:30
you know it's not like you have to win
01:04:31
Awards in order to get into college um
01:04:33
and you can definitely write a great
01:04:34
essay without winning awards for sure
01:04:38
how would I come up with uncommon
01:04:39
connections okay so this is going to
01:04:40
take a little time matth you but I would
01:04:42
say spend some time staring at that
01:04:45
values exercise that I linked in the
01:04:46
chat some students are going to be like
01:04:48
really fast at it and some students it's
01:04:50
going to take a little bit longer and
01:04:51
that's just I think that's just the way
01:04:53
our our brains work some students are
01:04:55
fired for uncommon connections and
01:04:57
they're like oh my gosh this water
01:04:59
bottle reminds me of like uh
01:05:01
conservation efforts that my school has
01:05:03
been struggling to make lately it also
01:05:05
reminds me of the color blue and how I
01:05:07
could Name six different panone colors
01:05:09
that are related to this and I could
01:05:10
even tell you the numbers related to
01:05:11
them it also reminds me of how I can't
01:05:14
for some reason like keep a water bottle
01:05:17
I'm constantly forgetting things like my
01:05:19
water bottle but I will I've never lost
01:05:21
my wallet in you know in 20 years of
01:05:23
owning it this is me making this up and
01:05:25
I that's how my brain works like I just
01:05:27
look at this and like I can think of six
01:05:28
different things that I could say about
01:05:29
this water bottle also because maybe I
01:05:31
studied improv um but for some students
01:05:34
they look at this and they're like
01:05:36
that's a water bottle like I don't I
01:05:38
don't know what else to say about that
01:05:40
um so if that's you if you're like it's
01:05:43
just a water bottle give yourself some
01:05:45
more time it might be fun to do this
01:05:47
with a partner but essentially whatever
01:05:49
your topic is try to First clearcut do a
01:05:52
what I call a prescribed burning
01:05:53
brainstorm stuff that you know people
01:05:55
would obvious viously say about this
01:05:56
thing and then don't say those
01:06:00
things all right last one do you support
01:06:03
the idea of writing about a passion
01:06:04
project or research for a personal essay
01:06:06
um I don't I recommend I I support
01:06:10
writing about a passion project or
01:06:11
research you've done in a supplemental
01:06:12
essay or putting in your activities list
01:06:15
um or if you do want to put it in there
01:06:17
put it in there briefly in just a
01:06:18
paragraph I wouldn't make that your main
01:06:19
topic and that's just my personal bias I
01:06:22
want to learn a variety of skills
01:06:24
qualities values I want to learn about
01:06:25
your personality if you can do that
01:06:27
through the passion project great I just
01:06:29
think it's it's hard I don't want to
01:06:30
like send you in that direction I want
01:06:32
to encourage you to think of other
01:06:33
possibilities for your personal
01:06:35
statement see YouTube video in the chat
01:06:38
above for ideas
01:06:41
there
01:06:42
okay that's what I got Renee are you I
01:06:44
don't know if you're still there and you
01:06:45
want to unmute and say hi if not that's
01:06:47
totally fine but um thanks y'all thanks
01:06:50
for being here thank you Diana for
01:06:52
keeping up how many questions 112
01:06:54
questions might be a new record um and
01:06:57
Haley hugget had won has won the new
01:06:59
book so for those of you who didn't join
01:07:01
early join early next time because we
01:07:03
sent out a Google form uh we can
01:07:05
actually let's let's link the Google
01:07:06
form one more time and let's do this
01:07:09
let's give out another free book and
01:07:11
we'll follow up via email with whoever
01:07:13
wins so thank you we've got the Google
01:07:15
form in there for those of you who are
01:07:17
interested fill out the Google form and
01:07:19
let us know about you who you are what
01:07:21
you're about and then we'll follow up
01:07:23
with a second free book winner uh and
01:07:25
then if you wouldn't mind um Diana just
01:07:28
let Jasmine know that we're having two
01:07:30
book winners this time so rapid fire
01:07:32
extra free book opportunity we're going
01:07:34
to log off here you all can fill out the
01:07:36
form it's in the it's in the chat um and
01:07:40
you know take your time whatever five
01:07:41
minutes whatever it takes and um we'll
01:07:44
follow up with someone we will choose
01:07:46
randomly thanks y for being here stay up
01:07:49
St late with us some of you probably
01:07:51
very late and um we'll see you next time
01:07:54
bye okay

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