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[Music]
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This is a fun little song
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about shooting blood from your car.
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Immediate and complete reports of local.
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What happened was true. The most bizarre
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and brutal series of crimes.
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[Music]
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We're going to be enjoying something on
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the grill.
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Got me some more goon juice cuz I'm
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going to be gooning to some, you know,
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abominable things.
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Not Not really. I don't I don't get off
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to gore. That's weird.
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Oh my god. I like the way it feels in my
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throat. So, you may notice my hair is
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back. Got this little updo thing going
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cuz my hair looks like [ __ ] And I need
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a shower actually to be real. Bad. Like,
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who we Anyway, I'm a lady, okay, at
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heart at least. And I am I just want you
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to know that I'm not looking my best
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right now because
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reasons. But I do have time for you
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today. And I have time because we're
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going to go look at some alleged
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cannibalism in Haiti. And I mean,
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there's most certainly cannibalism in
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these videos. Not all of them to be
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fair. At least I suspect. I haven't seen
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all of them. But we got to go back a
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little bit. You know, like how they say
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in like everything else, Rich is like
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for that we're going to have to go back
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a while. We got to do that a little bit
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back to 2024. I want to say March back
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when uh how do I say this without
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getting political?
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The Epstein client list. Um people were
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trying to put forward some propaganda
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propaganda against Haiti. Now why do
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that? I don't really remember but it it
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was pretty stupid. Now does Haiti have a
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history of cannibalism? Very peppered
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kind of like any island people
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basically. Like I mean for [ __ ] sake
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I'm pretty sure Hawaii has some stories
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too. Don't they th didn't they throw
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folks in volcanoes? Don't even try to
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make this a racist thing too. Oh yeah.
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And never unless we forget white people.
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That's not even an SJW point. That's
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just like I could say that and any
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history buff would be like, "Yep,
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yep."
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Anyway, there were some videos going
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around and I'm not going to go over
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those videos because they're actually
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just unrelated topics. And that's this
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whole thing um from like an observer
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article from from France or some [ __ ]
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like that. And it's a really well put
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together article. There's no sense of
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going over the whole thing, but it
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debunks all the like musky opinions and
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weird propaganda pieces. No, but what I
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have on my hands is something different.
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Now, does cannibalism actually happen in
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Haiti is a big question a lot of people
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have. And it's basically like an urban
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legend type deal. I mean, when you look
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this up, you're getting a lot of mixed
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reception and a lot of hard yeses and
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hard nos. Which way is it? I'm here to
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tell you that it's a little bit of both.
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Now, to be 100% fair, am I sure that
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every one of these clips is from Haiti?
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No. not in the least bit. However, I
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mean, it's just genuinely in the news.
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And even the article that um it the
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whole debunking article actually
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discussed this a bit and it basically
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just said, "Yeah, it does happen, but
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it's mostly related to like gang
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violence." And I mean, are we really
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going to go like when it comes out to
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like,
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you know, weird abominable things and
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people eating each other. I mean, the
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CJNG to like become a sakario, you have
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to engage in cannibalism. not like
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regularly, but at least once as like a
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show of loyalty or something. And that's
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insane. That's insane. But I actually
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have five clips for you today. They're
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not all the longest ones. So don't, you
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know, don't be thinking we're going to
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be here all day, but it is going to be
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very interesting. So if you like things
00:04:02
like this or perhaps you want to see
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them uncensored, you should definitely
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hit subscribe and the bell icon to get
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notified when I post new video. And you
00:04:08
can also find all the good stuff in the
00:04:09
description as well. Chat with me daily
00:04:11
in the Discord. Get premium videos.
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There's even some premium gourmis videos
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coming out. Yep, one is being published
00:04:18
today. If you want some of that goon
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juice from earlier, that's also in
00:04:21
there. That's gamer subs. Get that
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carbonated out. That's That's delicious.
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So, I'm just going to go in the order
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that I got these from a friend. What a
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friendships. Isn't that interesting?
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Yeah. No, this is something that I
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didn't actually intend to cover for this
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entry on Gormas either. Um I just
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finally got around to looking at it and
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I was like, that was bad. Um because I
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basically just give like a little
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glossery like skimming and I'm like,
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"Oh, that looks abominable. Let me go
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let me watch this. Let me do this and
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whatever." And yeah, you might notice
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there's some uh Pokemon and Lisa Frank
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stickers on my phone. I don't care what
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you think about that. I am wearing horns
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and a Kirby shirt right now.
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But all right, I know what you're here
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for, you [ __ ] freak.
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Here for the blood and guts and living
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color. And yeah, that actually is
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Christine Shabbug, by the way.
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Come crucify me. Just prove I look like
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Jesus. This is the second coming.
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Get ready for the third.
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Anyway, let's start this [ __ ] in three,
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two,
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one.
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Oh, hello.
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Ohio State. Is that you?
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Oh, they're all just uh
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in there. I feel like this is gang
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related.
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I don't think that's cultural. He looks
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higher than a giraffe's [ __ ]
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Yo, bro, give me some. Oh, wow. That
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looks really bad. The uncensored people
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are going to get a doozy. Oh my god.
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Okay, well that was that was atrocious.
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Honestly though, I kept thinking like
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Salsbury steak or like riletts. Like oh
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man, I want barbecue. Like I'm
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big back at heart. I ain't a fat boy at
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all. Tall.
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It's this is what it is. And
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but I can eat.
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What's this one? I really hope that's
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not a kid that's going to get hurt in
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this one. All right, let's start this in
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three,
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two, one. And I'm sorry about the lack
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of concept. Oh, he ate [ __ ] Oh, that.
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Oh, what the [ __ ]
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Okay. Well, that that kid was just
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trying to get out of the commotion,
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rightfully so. They were dragging a
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mutilated body through the streets and
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hitting him with an axe with the flying.
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What is happening? Why are they Why are
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they What the What the hell?
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Why are they Why are they jumping this
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guy?
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Oh no, there's machetes in the back of
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there. What the Why does everybody have
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their own melee weapon? It's like their
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own like one's a tire. It's like a
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zombie apocalypse. Everybody's got the
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very specific melee weapons. Actually,
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this is okay.
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I think that's just civil unrest. And I
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don't know what they're unrestful about,
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but they need to take a damn melatonin.
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That was a That was a lot. What the
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hell? I mean, I hope the kid's okay. He
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ate [ __ ] and hit his back. I mean, I
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hope other than, you know, the severe
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psychological trauma,
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but I mean, he wasn't the victim there.
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What the [ __ ] [ __ ] Oh, this one
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looks nice. Oh,
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there's a there's a bunch of body parts
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like mutilating gushy gushy in a
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wheelbarrow. I can I can only imagine
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that that is a I can only imagine that
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that's going to friendly. I I can only
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imagine what this will entail. In fact,
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let's dive in. Let's do another
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countdown. I have to because then, you
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know, audio video sync and other a bunch
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of other crap and edit.
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Don't don't be an editor. I mean, I'll
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do it. I got to do it. But like
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anyway,
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three, two, one. Why does everybody have
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Adidas pants, by the way? Start it.
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Oh, why are they petting him with a
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machete? What? What even?
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And they got the Teeu like weird hook
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knife like this fion type looking
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[ __ ] knife. What? What even?
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Like what is the context?
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I imagine this is specifically like his
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brain's like out of his forehead. Oh my
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god. He did the goofy zoom like the
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in-n-out zoom like this one where it's
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like I'm gonna I don't know like you're
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getting [ __ ] missionary for me or
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whatever. Like what the [ __ ] Why did he
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do it the whole time? It was just like
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Yeah. At this point, I'm going to start
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critiquing the Gourd people's camera
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work because it's really getting absurd.
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Even from the last like 10 years, we
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should have had a lot better in
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everything. I mean, if us YouTubers can
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do it, why can't you guys, and I know
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statistically,
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someone will see this that's probably
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going to end up doing something
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abominable. No, I don't support it, but
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I'm just talking about statistics, okay?
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Like big shack statistics, okay?
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And
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I know
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that you'll get caught,
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but when you do, don't tell them I made
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you do it with telepathy. I forget where
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I was going with that stupid joke, but
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it's it's just kind of like learn a
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lesson from this. I'm going to critique
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you if you're going to make your little
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snuff film. It's not a snuff film, by
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the way. Definition matters.
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I'm I'm just a very poor sweet innocent
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thing. Uh we should probably get to the
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last one. Oh, cool. Suicide Boys and
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Bones just dropped something. What do
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you know? Oh, it's not even the last
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thing. We got two more. Oh, hell yeah.
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Okay, so you know those like fold up
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card tables like I don't want to say
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like a camping one. They're usually
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white fold up into like two. Um
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yeah.
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Why does everybody always assume this is
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cannibalism? Like maybe he just didn't
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want to be on the ground. You ever think
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that posture like matters? I'm trying to
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train mine again. Like oh my god, I'm
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tall. But I'm like
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like man, you can't be like that anyway.
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Three, two, one. Oh, he got the Great
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Value machete. Never mind. That's
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cutting through like butter.
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Oh, they're not feeding the dog, are
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they?
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That kind of makes me upset. Like you
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keep your own things to yourself. Don't
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Don't involve the doggo like that. I
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mean, unless he's like ripping off a
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someone's wee wee, but that email's kind
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of context context context. So, they're
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just like butchering a guy on a table.
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Yo, why' you like center on the dong
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area? Like, he's already like what is
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what goes through your head? Also, why
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the jeans?
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Man's acting like he's about to go in a
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club in Miami. Like, I'm not even
00:11:00
kidding. You should see this outfit.
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Like, you should see this outfit. You
00:11:03
could see it uncensored. You know where
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to go. But like this is freaking wild.
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Like
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how long is this one? Oh, we got a
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minute here. Okay.
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Whoa.
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The way that [ __ ] hollowed out and
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worked. What?
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What? What?
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He's
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doing a terrible job. And yeah, and it
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looks like they've already like
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excavated some of them organs, you know,
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like Blippy like I'm an excavator.
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Hey, dirt. See you later. Oh, he's got
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like a [ __ ] gun in his Damn. Okay.
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Yeah. See, this is gang [ __ ] This ain't
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just these people eating each other now.
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I mean, we did see that already. And I'm
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excited to see this last clip to see if
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we get to see any more of it. Now, I do
00:11:55
have a lot of things about cannibalism I
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want to cover and that was it. But
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actual cannibalism like actually you
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know like it's it's not that you're
00:12:05
going to see it out of the cartels a
00:12:06
lot. I mean they're the ones who want to
00:12:07
shock and all. Of course. I mean no
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doubt these guys do too. I mean that was
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pretty shocking. Um this already um um
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um um um um it is pretty bad. Um um um
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um. It is uh very um jungly. And those
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those headless guys, they look very
00:12:28
hollow. Like surprise. This looks like
00:12:30
some [ __ ] you'd find in Doom. Like it
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I'm all right. Three, two, one.
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Hello.
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Okay. Oh, there's another. They got
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three of them again. And I feel like
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this is just gang violence. Oh, a lot of
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his organs all splooshied out. So,
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they're really big and disembowing out
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there, huh? That's uh pretty uh pretty
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intense.
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Yeah. So, that's pretty intense.
00:13:02
Oh, there's another.
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Did they open him from the back? Oh,
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what the hell? Bare-handed. I don't
00:13:09
know. I guess they're all kind of
00:13:10
bare-handed.
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It's like, why so extra? Why is
00:13:15
everybody Oh, they are just holding that
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open and cutting everything. Oh my god,
00:13:20
it's like a viva section. Oh, is that
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the heart?
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What are they going to pull his heart
00:13:25
out? I think they're going to pull his
00:13:27
heart out.
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No. What are they trying to pull out?
00:13:31
What are you guys doing?
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Honestly though, I shouldn't even judge
00:13:34
them that hard. These are the most
00:13:35
careful people I've seen with a blade
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inside someone's guts in a while.
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That's something to say.
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Invite me to meet your parents, ladies.
00:13:47
What the [ __ ] Oh my god. I do I can say
00:13:52
I can stop swearing. Yeah. And that was
00:13:54
it.
00:13:58
Well, that was intense. See, only one
00:14:00
bit of cannibalism there. And see, this
00:14:01
is why context is important with Gore.
00:14:04
Now, are people was that video from
00:14:06
Haiti? It could have been. I mean, they
00:14:08
have a lot of quote civil unrest.
00:14:10
There's a lot of things going on. out
00:14:11
there is not the best place to be. And
00:14:14
it's, you know, regularly like erased by
00:14:16
hurricanes. I I just don't I I just
00:14:18
don't get it. I mean, I don't know how
00:14:21
certain civilizations honestly survive
00:14:24
during things like that because it's
00:14:26
like are you you just like hope for the
00:14:28
best? Like I mean, I don't know. America
00:14:30
is pretty complicated in that way, too.
00:14:32
I think a tornado alley of the same way.
00:14:33
I'm just like, why do you if you live in
00:14:35
CA why do you live in Kansas for any
00:14:37
reason, by the way? Why do you live in
00:14:39
Kansas? I mean, you probably don't have
00:14:41
a choice. But if you do have a choice
00:14:43
and you're choosing to live in Kansas,
00:14:44
why are you living in Kansas?
00:14:48
[Music]
00:14:49
What are you doing? I mean, I say that
00:14:51
and I got so many buttons down here. I
00:14:53
can't even say this is a button. This
00:14:54
ain't no button-up anymore. It's
00:14:55
definitely a button down. Like, there's
00:14:56
no I'm I'm dressed like the a beach
00:14:59
adventure anime character. And you know
00:15:01
what? That's cool. I'm This is the beach
00:15:03
episode of um No Happy Endings
00:15:06
Productions
00:15:07
and I'm happy to share it with you. So,
00:15:10
if you would like to join me on these
00:15:11
kinds of adventures and more um of this
00:15:15
buffoonery, again, hit subscribe, all
00:15:18
that good stuff, I look forward to
00:15:20
seeing you in the next video. And
00:15:22
remember,
00:15:24
if it bleeds, it leads.
00:15:29
[Music]
