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when you think of a person with
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depression what you probably see in your
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mind is more of a stereotype or a
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caricature than a realistic image you
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might think of somebody laying in bed
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crying binge watching shows scrolling
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endlessly on social media isolating from
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people and avoiding work or school or
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whatever other responsibilities they
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have and depression can look that way in
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fact it often does but there are other
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presentations of depression that don't
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fit The Stereotype at all and today I
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want to bring your awareness to what I
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believe is the most misunderstood or
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just simply missed subtype of depression
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and I'm talking about a c a group of
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people commonly referred to as
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individuals with high functioning
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depression the outward signs of high
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functioning depression are very very
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subtle typically the only people who
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know how bad this person is struggling
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is the person themselves they look fine
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on the outside but they are suffering or
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even dying on the inside I know that
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might sound dramatic but that is truly
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what it feels like these are people who
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when they cannot mask their depression
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any longer and finally have their
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breakdown whatever that looks like
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whether that's not being able to
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function anymore or avoiding everybody
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or worst case scenario Dying by Suicide
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everyone around them says I had no idea
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I had no clue this person was struggling
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I had no clue this person was suffering
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it's a very important thing to
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understand today I'm going to review
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with you eight signs that someone is
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struggling with high functioning
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depression the first is that they are
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high achieving but they feel very little
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emotion with regard to their
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accomplishments so this is a person who
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has done a lot in life they might have
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graduate degrees they might have a lot
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of promotions at work they might help a
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lot of people they might make a lot of
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money they might be very very skilled at
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what they do all of which makes other
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people look at them and think well that
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person's clearly not depressed because
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they are doing awesome but what you they
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often hide it very well this is probably
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more for like if this is you but what
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you might notice about that person is
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that they don't ever really seem to
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experience much in the way of Pride or
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accomplishment or Joy or achievement
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they they just do the thing and then
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they do the next thing and then they do
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the next thing and you don't see you
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don't see celebration you don't see
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reward you don't see appreciation you
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maybe don't see much emotion at all they
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just keep going just keep doing that is
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because their reward system is disrupted
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some people and I would count myself in
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this group of people at least as an
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adult I was not as an adolescent some
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people have the ability to continue
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functioning effectively for a very
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prolonged period of time in the absence
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of experiencing the emotion of reward
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and that at its core is what depression
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is it disrupts the reward pathway it
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steals our ability to feel it robs us of
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the link between our actions and the
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internal outcomes of our actions which
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is that it feels good to do this stuff
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so this is a person who is just trudging
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along but they are doing it very
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skillfully because they found a way to
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detach their skill level and their
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achievement from their emotions at least
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for longer than most people can these
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people still cannot necessarily do it
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forever and that's sometimes when the
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really scary outcome happens the second
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sign of high functioning depression is
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the ability to quickly and easily
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disassemble any potential source of
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positivity in their own minds this is
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almost an impressive like anti-
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superpower where if anything good exists
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or happens in this person's life they
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don't even do it on purpose or
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intentionally or consciously sometimes
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but their brain will just take this
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stimuli coming from the outside that's
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like supposed to be really good or or
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exciting or rewarding and their brain
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will just take it apart and leave it as
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like just a pile of rubble on the ground
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so that it's nothing so that like yeah
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you you have a wonderful family at home
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who loves you and it's like in in a
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nanoc their brains like but any of us
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could die at any time so it doesn't
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matter it's like this extreme pessimism
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isn't even the right word for it it's
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more like this Ultra nihilistic but in
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nihilism isn't inherently negative it's
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it's nihilism taken to such an extreme
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that nothing matters and what I think
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this is I don't know that anybody could
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ever prove this this is just my theory
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what I think it is is it's The Logical
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mind reacting to the absence of emotion
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that we mentioned in the previous sign
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of high functioning depression which is
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the absence of reward this person's
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brain needs a reason to explain why
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these why I feel nothing from these good
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things happening and so you break
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everything down to its most basic
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elements or Essentials and therefore you
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conclude here's why this thing doesn't
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matter here's why this isn't actually
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good here's why this doesn't actually
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count for me here's why I don't need to
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feel anything from it
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um it's a pretty incredible ability it's
00:05:02
kind of like those people who can like
00:05:03
disarm somebody and take their gun apart
00:05:05
in 2 seconds um only this one just makes
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your life worse unfortunately the third
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sign that somebody has high functioning
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depression is that they have at least
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one socially acceptable addiction that
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might sound weird but I'll explain there
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are some addictions that are very
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stigmatized by our society so that would
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be things like you know drug abuse or or
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gambling or like these are things that
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if you see someone doing them
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excessively
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you you probably if we're all being
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honest have some judgmental thoughts
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towards that person or at least think
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like oh that person is clearly doing
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something that hurts them high
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functioning depressed people often find
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a way to channel their addiction into
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something that is rewarding in some way
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or another like to the world in general
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two of the most common ones I see are
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addiction to Fitness and workaholism so
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those are things if you see someone just
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crushing it in the gym every day you
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don't think of that person the same way
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that you think of someone who goes to
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the bar every day probably right but
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sometimes it is the same underlying
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emotional problems driving each of those
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behaviors which is I either don't want
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to or don't know how to deal with the
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problems I'm facing in life so I'm just
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going to pour all of my energy into this
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thing and use this as my escape from
00:06:19
everything else or workaholism again
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someone who shoots to the top of their
00:06:23
ladder in their field or in their place
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of employment you don't necessarily look
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at that person most people don't look at
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that person and think oh that's an
00:06:31
addict who is struggling with their
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emotions but they often are people use
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work to avoid dealing with other
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problems to avoid dealing with
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loneliness to avoid dealing with
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Conflict at home to avoid dealing with
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health problems because they know I can
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just do this thing and people tell me
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I'm doing a good job and I make more
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money so I'm just going to keep pouring
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all my time and energy into that ignore
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everything else and just hope it works
00:06:53
out and I'm not trying again I hope I'm
00:06:55
not coming across as mean and judgmental
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here cuz this is a pattern I have fallen
00:06:58
into more than one in my own life people
00:07:01
with high functioning depression anyone
00:07:03
who struggles with any kind of mental
00:07:05
illness usually has at least one
00:07:06
maladaptive coping mechanism that they
00:07:08
use excessively hence addiction the
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people with high functioning depression
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have figured out either on purpose or on
00:07:14
accident if I use this thing as my
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crutch people don't get mad at me for it
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in fact people tell me I'm awesome
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because of this so they figure that out
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and they repeat that behavior and it
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keeps them flying under people's radar
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not realizing how badly they are
00:07:27
struggling the fourth sign that somebody
00:07:29
has high functioning depression is that
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they have decent relationships but feel
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chronically alone so this is the person
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they may be an introvert or an extrovert
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I don't know that there's any
00:07:40
relationship there but this is the
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person who can enter a social Gathering
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and function fine in that context they
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they know how to talk to people they
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know how to blend in they know how to be
00:07:51
socially appropriate but they don't feel
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connected to any of these people they
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feel as if they are like an actor
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playing a role or or a character in a TV
00:08:01
show and that they're just saying their
00:08:03
lines they don't feel a sense of actual
00:08:07
deepened connection with the people that
00:08:09
they interact with so this is that
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person who can be alone in a crowd so to
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speak it's it's not that they feel
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physically alone but they feel
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emotionally alone their heart does not
00:08:20
feel connected to the hearts of other
00:08:22
people and typically this is because
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they have so much difficulty with
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vulnerability because there's such a gap
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between how they actually feel and how
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the World Views them if everybody thinks
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that you are just getting up and
00:08:35
crushing it every day and in some ways
00:08:37
you are it's not even that those people
00:08:38
are wrong we really tend to take other
00:08:41
people at face value though and when you
00:08:42
see somebody who's healthy and socially
00:08:45
active and has a job and has a family
00:08:48
and has a good education you think that
00:08:50
person is probably doing well
00:08:52
emotionally and many of them are but
00:08:54
that is not always true there are people
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I've worked with many of these people
00:08:58
who outwardly have everything and inside
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they feel nothing and if those people
00:09:04
were to tell you that they're depressed
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a lot of people if we're being honest a
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lot of people would not know how to
00:09:10
respond to that you might be skeptical
00:09:12
you might not believe them you might you
00:09:14
might have no idea what to say compared
00:09:16
to a person who like you already thought
00:09:18
they were depressed and then they tell
00:09:19
you they're depressed it's like well
00:09:20
yeah I could I could tell no offense
00:09:23
you'd be shocked if this person opened
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up to you and so that's why they don't
00:09:26
typically open up to people because they
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don't think anyone will understand and
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so their heart remains alone the fifth
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sign that somebody has high functioning
00:09:34
depression is that they are driven by
00:09:36
insecurity and inferiority rather than
00:09:39
by achievement and accomplishment so in
00:09:42
general there are two drivers to human
00:09:44
behavior are really the behavior of all
00:09:46
mammals either moving towards something
00:09:48
positive or moving away from something
00:09:50
negative for most people moving towards
00:09:54
the positive is a more powerful driver
00:09:56
of behavior and so most people who are
00:09:58
pursuing again I know I'm using these
00:10:00
examples a lot but they're examples that
00:10:02
everyone relates to to some degree um
00:10:04
for people who are pursuing you know
00:10:06
Advanced degrees or raises or promotions
00:10:08
at work usually it's like I would feel
00:10:11
good if I got this you know having more
00:10:13
money would give me more more Comfort or
00:10:16
more peace or um getting this degree
00:10:18
would make me feel more confident in
00:10:20
myself it's like I would feel better
00:10:22
about who I am if I did this thing or
00:10:25
had this thing for the mind of someone
00:10:27
with high functioning depression the
00:10:28
behavior might might be the same but the
00:10:30
driver is the opposite the person with
00:10:32
high functioning depression thinks I I
00:10:36
suck I'm terrible I'm worthless I'm a
00:10:37
loser and I hate feeling like that and I
00:10:40
want to try to prove it wrong whereas a
00:10:42
lot of people are like I act I think I
00:10:44
have more to offer the world than what
00:10:46
my current situation allows I think I'm
00:10:48
underutilized I think I'm
00:10:50
underappreciated and I want the world to
00:10:51
see who I am so I'm going to do
00:10:53
something to prove that I am right
00:10:55
that's the core difference here proving
00:10:57
that trying to prove that you're right
00:10:58
or trying prove that you're wrong a
00:11:00
person with high functioning depression
00:11:02
their mind is their enemy their inner
00:11:04
thoughts are so critical so negative so
00:11:07
harsh so just straight up mean to be
00:11:09
honest with you and it feels terrible
00:11:11
and so they're constantly pushing
00:11:14
themselves harder and harder and harder
00:11:16
to try to prove the voice wrong the
00:11:18
annoying thing is you cannot shut that
00:11:20
voice up by achievement alone and so
00:11:22
that's again why going back to number
00:11:24
one why these people often have like
00:11:26
above average success in in certain
00:11:29
domains because they're constantly
00:11:31
trying to fight this enemy that they
00:11:33
cannot defeat through accomplishment the
00:11:35
goalposts just move endlessly oh you got
00:11:38
that promotion well you still suck cuz
00:11:39
you're not this and it just keeps
00:11:41
getting pushed further and further out
00:11:43
and that's why they keep achieving and
00:11:44
they keep pushing themselves because
00:11:46
they're trying to fight back against an
00:11:47
inner voice that nobody else hears or
00:11:49
understands the sixth sign that somebody
00:11:51
has high functioning depression is that
00:11:53
they never feel fully awake this one is
00:11:57
hard to articulate if you have haven't
00:11:59
felt it before but most people even if
00:12:03
they have been struggling you know with
00:12:05
like stress or being really busy or
00:12:06
burnout or insomnia if they get a couple
00:12:09
good nights of sleep in a row good in
00:12:11
terms of both quality and quantity they
00:12:14
wake up with this like refreshed ready
00:12:17
capable feeling and when you're dealing
00:12:19
with depression especially high
00:12:21
functioning depression you never really
00:12:24
get that there's always just sort of
00:12:26
this fog over everything that you do
00:12:29
and you feel a little bit slow you feel
00:12:32
a little bit distracted you feel a
00:12:34
little bit forgetful a lot of times
00:12:36
these people end up thinking that they
00:12:37
have ADHD like inattentive type ADHD
00:12:40
which is what most people call add and
00:12:42
some of them do but this high
00:12:44
functioning depression can create a lot
00:12:47
of symptoms that look a lot like mild
00:12:49
ADHD and it relates to psychomotor
00:12:52
retardation which is basically it just
00:12:54
means your brain and your body are
00:12:55
working a little slower than normal
00:12:58
which is a symptom of depression uh it's
00:13:00
not always a symptom that fully disables
00:13:02
or debilitates a person they just you
00:13:05
never feel 100% you you're your
00:13:07
self-care and your daily routines could
00:13:09
be perfect and you just don't ever feel
00:13:13
like you're quite all the way here and
00:13:15
it's enough to just drive you nuts the
00:13:17
seventh symptom of high functioning
00:13:19
depression is that Hobbies feel like a
00:13:22
waste of time a person with high
00:13:24
functioning depression because they
00:13:26
don't feel a lot of positive emotion
00:13:29
from the things that they do they tend
00:13:31
to give up on their Hobbies completely
00:13:33
because essentially the only purpose of
00:13:35
a hobby is to feel good right when you
00:13:38
aren't really capable of feeling good
00:13:40
you have to you either shut down which
00:13:43
would not be a person with high
00:13:44
functioning depression or you find
00:13:47
another fuel source to drive you and so
00:13:50
if I can't feel good from anything if I
00:13:52
don't if I don't feel Joy no matter what
00:13:54
I do I might as well do the joyless
00:13:56
thing that makes me money rather than
00:13:58
the joy thing that makes me no money or
00:14:01
the joyless thing that gets me in better
00:14:02
shape rather than the joyless thing that
00:14:04
doesn't get me in better shape and so
00:14:06
when people are struggling with high
00:14:07
functioning depression they tend to cut
00:14:09
out all Hobbies all interests sometimes
00:14:12
even socializing and they tend to just
00:14:15
focus on doing things that create
00:14:17
tangible benefit to them something
00:14:19
measurable or something that helps other
00:14:21
people because that's the only reason
00:14:24
they can see to do anything since there
00:14:26
is no internal sense of reward for their
00:14:29
actions and the eighth sign of high
00:14:31
functioning depression is that these
00:14:32
people take big risks and they know it
00:14:36
that last part is critical because
00:14:39
engaging in Risky behaviors or making
00:14:41
big changes to your life that can also
00:14:43
be a symptom of a manic episode which
00:14:45
may be part of bipolar disorder but when
00:14:47
a person is engaging in Risky behavior
00:14:49
in a manic episode they don't recognize
00:14:52
it as risky at the time they only have
00:14:55
that Insight later down the road when
00:14:57
somebody is taking risks and they're
00:15:00
depressed they know it they know that
00:15:02
this could really screw their lives up
00:15:04
and they just kind of don't care the
00:15:06
crazy thing is a lot of times these
00:15:08
risks pay off this might be someone
00:15:10
who's like an entrepreneur like they
00:15:11
leave their job to start uh their own
00:15:13
business and you know they know it's a
00:15:16
big risk but it but it ends up working
00:15:18
partially because of some of these other
00:15:19
symptoms we've talked about um that
00:15:22
their gambles pay off more often than
00:15:24
not but their life looks like a bunch of
00:15:28
really question decisions they almost
00:15:30
look very lucky and I don't think that's
00:15:31
quite right it's they they feel like
00:15:34
they have less to lose because they
00:15:36
don't feel particularly great anyway and
00:15:39
in fact sometimes doing really risky
00:15:40
things making these big Life Changes is
00:15:43
such an emotional experience that it
00:15:44
kind of breaks through that hard outer
00:15:46
shell a little bit makes them feel
00:15:48
something for a little while so
00:15:49
sometimes they get almost addicted to
00:15:51
risk-taking behaviors again whether
00:15:52
that's career financially socially
00:15:54
whatever it may be like they want to
00:15:56
take that next big leap because it's the
00:15:57
only thing that makes them feel live
00:15:59
sometimes so I know I didn't offer any
00:16:01
you know strategies or interventions for
00:16:03
dealing with this here I don't know that
00:16:06
there are any different treatment
00:16:08
protocols as far as things like therapy
00:16:10
or medication or things you can do at
00:16:11
home for high functioning depression
00:16:14
versus any other type of depression I I
00:16:16
don't think it requires you to do
00:16:18
anything different than you would if you
00:16:20
felt any other type of depression so
00:16:22
this piece of content is more about
00:16:24
awareness the group of people I just
00:16:26
described most of the world would not
00:16:28
regard them as depressed they may not
00:16:31
even regard themselves as depressed so
00:16:34
if this sounds like somebody you know
00:16:37
try to have a conversation with them
00:16:38
about it don't expect them to open up to
00:16:41
you right away um they're probably going
00:16:43
to be very guarded about this and it
00:16:44
might take several attempts for you to
00:16:46
get at it but just showing that you care
00:16:49
and showing that you see that they may
00:16:51
not be doing as well as everyone else
00:16:53
thinks they are probably means more to
00:16:55
them than you realize if this sounds
00:16:57
like you what I have just described I
00:17:00
want you to consider the possibility
00:17:02
that you are experiencing a depression
00:17:04
that looks a little bit different than
00:17:06
what you thought it was going to look
00:17:07
like and if that's the case consider
00:17:10
accessing appropriate Professional
00:17:12
Resources to see if they might help you
00:17:14
I hope this helps let me know if you
00:17:16
guys want to see more content about high
00:17:18
functioning depression uh this is the
00:17:19
first piece of content I've made on it
00:17:21
so I'm open to feedback take care and
00:17:23
I'll see you next time
