00:00:00
so not only did you want to know how to
00:00:01
attract an intj now you're telling me
00:00:03
that you want to know how to tell if an
00:00:05
intj is interested in you or not did I
00:00:07
get that right who do I look like that
00:00:09
matchmaking lady from Mulan well
00:00:10
obviously I can't be the matchmaking
00:00:12
lady because that's my Auntie I'll tell
00:00:14
you what you want to hear how to tell if
00:00:15
an intj is interested but I'm not doing
00:00:17
it for you with the potential iotj
00:00:19
Suitor no no no no no no no no I'm doing
00:00:21
this for the intj because there's a lot
00:00:24
of intjs out there that I know would be
00:00:26
great in relationships and the next
00:00:27
thing I'm going to say is very true to
00:00:29
most intjs out there we're not going to
00:00:31
make the first move so all you intjs out
00:00:32
there I'm doing this for you before I
00:00:34
begin this video there are a few things
00:00:35
that we need to align on so that this
00:00:37
entire video makes sense the first thing
00:00:39
is that cognitive functions will be
00:00:40
brought up in this video and if you're
00:00:42
into Mars Briggs you have to understand
00:00:43
cognitive functions because the first
00:00:45
four letters that anyone is introduced
00:00:47
to is how you spot a type in the wild
00:00:49
however cognitive functions is going to
00:00:51
tell you why a person does the thing
00:00:53
that they do it essentially tells you
00:00:54
how we operate and if you're not aware
00:00:56
of intj cognitive functions I made a
00:00:57
short video explaining all the cognitive
00:00:59
functions on how the they engage with
00:01:00
each other I'll link that in the
00:01:01
description below the second thing that
00:01:03
I want to address is that the intj is
00:01:05
going to analyze you we're going to
00:01:06
analyze you like a hawk the intj is
00:01:09
going to be the world's greatest
00:01:10
detective we're going to figure out
00:01:11
everything about you and most of the
00:01:12
time you're not even going to be aware
00:01:13
that we're doing it I'm not going to go
00:01:15
into details as to how and when we
00:01:17
collect our information because first it
00:01:19
sounds stalkerish it sounds like we're
00:01:20
the main character from the Netflix
00:01:21
series you and secondly I feel like I
00:01:23
can speak for most intjs is that we
00:01:25
don't want you guys to know this so I'm
00:01:27
not going to go over that you can ask
00:01:28
politely in the comments and maybe a
00:01:30
while that intj will explain lastly this
00:01:32
video is going to be broken down to
00:01:34
three different sections these three
00:01:35
sections are how I believe to be the
00:01:37
best way to categorize how an intj acts
00:01:39
whenever they're interested in someone
00:01:40
the sections in order is going to be
00:01:43
proximity consistency and vulnerability
00:01:45
I'll explain more about each section
00:01:47
later on this video so let's begin
00:01:48
section one proximity proximity in this
00:01:51
context is an intj finding a reason to
00:01:53
be around you and I personally believe
00:01:54
that proximity is the fun part for an
00:01:56
intj because this is when we become a
00:01:58
little out of character this is the part
00:02:00
where we become a little bit more
00:02:02
devious and outside of the authenticity
00:02:04
that we hope to achieve at most points
00:02:06
of our lives and after writing this
00:02:07
video intjs are that nerdy teenagers in
00:02:10
that teen drama who doesn't really
00:02:12
understand how to engage with Society
00:02:13
but just somehow gets in a relationship
00:02:16
just keep watching because you're going
00:02:17
to see it too intjs will make
00:02:19
encountering each other or bringing
00:02:20
around each other seem as if it's
00:02:22
completely random as if by God faith or
00:02:26
whatever we just happen to be in the
00:02:28
same area where we're going to engage
00:02:29
with each other so most of the time it's
00:02:31
not a meat cute it's been planned for
00:02:33
example oh you like seeing live
00:02:34
performances well I happen to have an
00:02:36
extra ticket because my buddy backed out
00:02:38
last minute do you want to go now I have
00:02:40
to go buy tickets I hope they're not
00:02:42
expensive oh you like Korean barbecue
00:02:43
I'm actually going to this Korean
00:02:44
barbecue place this weekend maybe you
00:02:46
want to join I could pick you up am I
00:02:48
trying too hard should I invite other
00:02:49
people oh you have an hour to kill
00:02:51
before the next class I actually forgot
00:02:53
the book that I need to study from at
00:02:54
home so I have free time you want to
00:02:56
hang out I hope he doesn't look in my
00:02:58
bag because the book's right there those
00:02:59
are easy examples of proximity when it
00:03:01
comes down to a small setting or a
00:03:02
one-on-one setting now let's look at it
00:03:04
from a perspective of having more people
00:03:06
around being at an event or at a social
00:03:08
Gathering when it comes down to go to an
00:03:09
event or social Gathering it's not
00:03:11
uncommon for an intj not to go we have
00:03:13
baby extrovert sensing as our fourth
00:03:15
cognitive function slot so when it comes
00:03:16
down to engaging with other people or
00:03:17
engaging with reality it's not a
00:03:19
priority to us but when the intj finds
00:03:21
out that you're going to be at a party
00:03:22
that we're also invited to will
00:03:24
reluctantly get off our chair put on
00:03:26
some pants maybe shower make ourselves
00:03:28
look a little presentable and pep talk
00:03:30
Papa introverted intuition and Mama
00:03:31
extroverted thinking into believing that
00:03:33
going to the party is exactly what we
00:03:35
want to do come on John she'll be at the
00:03:37
party too one day she might be your wife
00:03:38
and if she's your wife you'll never have
00:03:40
to do this again just one night for the
00:03:42
rest of your life John one night for the
00:03:44
rest of your life one of the things that
00:03:45
I find personally funny when it comes
00:03:46
down to an intj being at a social
00:03:48
gathering with one of the crush is that
00:03:50
90 of the time we're just gonna ignore
00:03:52
you there's no way in hell that an intj
00:03:55
is openly going to talk to you if
00:03:57
there's other people around that might
00:03:58
potentially see that where are
00:04:00
interested in you intjs already don't
00:04:01
like attention we especially don't like
00:04:03
attention when it comes down to our
00:04:05
feelings or anything that has to do with
00:04:06
introverted feeling so when an intj gets
00:04:08
there we'll make a round and talk to the
00:04:10
people that we need to talk to and then
00:04:11
once the party quiets down a little and
00:04:14
everyone's in their own little group and
00:04:15
then we believe that there's not going
00:04:17
to be people that focuses on our
00:04:19
conversation and yeah we'll have that
00:04:20
conversation we're not ignoring you
00:04:22
because we don't want to talk to you
00:04:23
it's because intjs are shy and yes intjs
00:04:27
do get shy when it comes down to
00:04:29
introverted feeling and
00:04:30
extrovertisements and I'm aware that
00:04:31
most people whenever they're around
00:04:32
their Crush they enjoy the butterfly
00:04:34
feeling because it makes them feel happy
00:04:35
it makes them feel whatever feeling that
00:04:37
they want but for an intj or for myself
00:04:39
personally I want that feeling to stop
00:04:41
it makes me cringe knowing that I could
00:04:42
feel that way or knowing that someone
00:04:43
else can make me feel that way can we
00:04:45
just be in a relationship already so I
00:04:46
don't have to feel this emotion it feels
00:04:48
weird so an intj won't talk to our Crush
00:04:51
immediately when we arrive to a party
00:04:52
but we're going to talk a little bit
00:04:55
louder when you're hearing distance
00:04:56
we'll be funnier than usual when you're
00:04:57
hearing distance we're going to come up
00:04:59
with a reason for you to stop your
00:05:00
conversation and stare at us even though
00:05:02
we're not having the same discussion
00:05:04
when you're hearing distance and being
00:05:05
as shy as we are we're gonna avoid eye
00:05:07
contact with you even though we like it
00:05:08
and if you're in a situation where you
00:05:10
and I ain't teaching by eye contact and
00:05:11
it's a long deep eye contact where you
00:05:13
guys are like oh hey this is longer than
00:05:15
usual you're already in baby it's time
00:05:17
for you to make your move stop this
00:05:19
video right now and go text our
00:05:20
talk.intj go
00:05:22
shoe the key point of this section is
00:05:24
that the intj wants to play it cool and
00:05:26
not make a steam as if we want to hang
00:05:27
out with you or for other people to
00:05:29
notice that we want to hang out with you
00:05:30
to summarize proximity in a single
00:05:32
sentence the intj will find a reason to
00:05:34
hang out but even after I went over
00:05:36
proximity it's not very clear is it you
00:05:38
might be asking yourself but John isn't
00:05:39
that what no more friends do and that's
00:05:41
an excellent question I'm glad you asked
00:05:43
what makes us different from a platonic
00:05:45
relationship is the combination of
00:05:46
proximity and our next section
00:05:48
consistency section two consistency
00:05:51
consistency in this video is the same
00:05:52
dictionary definition as the worst
00:05:54
consistent it's easier to notice
00:05:55
interest in this section than the
00:05:56
previous section of proximity but the
00:05:58
next section vulnerability will be the
00:06:00
easiest out of all three intj has Mama
00:06:02
extroverted thinking in her second slot
00:06:03
which means that we will show that we
00:06:05
care about someone by making their life
00:06:07
as easy as possible or taking care of
00:06:09
them so it's not uncommon for an intj to
00:06:11
go out of our way when we deal with
00:06:12
people that we care about it could be
00:06:13
something as simple as giving someone a
00:06:14
compliment or helping someone fix their
00:06:16
flat tire the biggest difference when it
00:06:17
comes down to a platonic relationship
00:06:19
and a romantic relationship is
00:06:20
consistency here are a few examples
00:06:22
example one let's talk about compliments
00:06:24
intjs don't provide compliments unless
00:06:26
we mean it because it goes against our
00:06:27
core value of being authentic and it
00:06:29
complements that intjs typically provide
00:06:31
are very specific to that person that we
00:06:33
notice that we don't see in most other
00:06:34
people so if there's a quality of
00:06:35
someone that stands out mom extrovert
00:06:38
thinking would want that person to know
00:06:39
and when it comes down to intj
00:06:40
complements they're provided once in a
00:06:42
blue moon it's not because people are
00:06:44
limited to only one trait that stands
00:06:45
out it's because the intj isn't focusing
00:06:47
on that person to notice all the other
00:06:49
attributes that the person has to make
00:06:51
them stand out so if you're the person
00:06:52
that has our affection you're the person
00:06:54
that has their attention and you're the
00:06:55
person that we're gonna notice a lot
00:06:57
about and compliments for an intj can
00:06:59
range from our Adoration of you engaging
00:07:01
with people in public settings all the
00:07:03
way to how much we enjoy seeing your
00:07:05
dimples show up whenever you laugh so if
00:07:07
you're a person that consistently
00:07:08
receives compliments from intj within a
00:07:10
certain time span that means you have
00:07:11
our attention and that's something that
00:07:13
most people would never get the second
00:07:14
example is that we ask you questions out
00:07:16
of context I feel like everyone that
00:07:17
watches my video already knows that intj
00:07:19
asks lots of questions and we asked lots
00:07:22
of questions because we need Clarity and
00:07:24
a difference between the way we ask
00:07:25
questions with someone as platonic as
00:07:27
opposed to someone that's romantic is
00:07:28
the type of questions that we ask when
00:07:30
we ask it and how we ask those questions
00:07:32
intjs are naturally Socratic we're going
00:07:34
to ask questions to get to the root but
00:07:36
when it comes down to questions we
00:07:36
typically only ask them whenever it
00:07:38
pertains to the topic that we're
00:07:39
discussing and if we think of another
00:07:40
question later we'll just text that
00:07:41
person but that question would still
00:07:43
have to do with that topic that we were
00:07:45
discussing but if an intj asks you a
00:07:46
question that seems to be out of the
00:07:48
blue it has nothing to do with the topic
00:07:49
that you're discussing and seems a
00:07:51
little bit specific to yourself only it
00:07:53
still technically means that we need
00:07:54
Clarity but Clarity on what you might be
00:07:56
asking and that's another great question
00:07:58
good job what reason would an intj have
00:08:00
to ask you about your favorite color
00:08:01
when none of your discussions previously
00:08:03
had anything to do with colors what
00:08:04
value does it provide to intj if we ask
00:08:06
about your favorite musician when the
00:08:08
conversation about music ended like two
00:08:10
or three days ago if you already
00:08:11
answered the question in the original
00:08:12
text of the eye into Jason why would
00:08:14
they continue the conversation by asking
00:08:15
you more questions the answer is simple
00:08:18
we're thinking about you but I do want
00:08:20
to make it clear that asking random
00:08:21
questions is something think that's
00:08:22
normal for an intj to do with people
00:08:24
that we care about because there might
00:08:26
be a reason for it that the intj won't
00:08:28
tell you about what should stick out to
00:08:29
you personally is how often we do it
00:08:31
specifically to you intjs we're
00:08:33
typically out in la la land we don't
00:08:35
have time to think about anyone else but
00:08:36
for some odd reason within a certain
00:08:38
time span the intj is asking you a lot
00:08:40
of questions that seemed a little bit
00:08:41
personal it's a little odd isn't it the
00:08:43
last thing that I want to add to this
00:08:44
section is the consistency at which we
00:08:46
respond to your messages so if intj
00:08:48
respond at a certain Cadence that either
00:08:50
means the intj has no plans that they're
00:08:52
working on at this point or the intjs
00:08:54
into you Cadence is one of those
00:08:55
interesting things too because it
00:08:57
differs from intj to intj so you
00:08:59
personally have to figure out what is a
00:09:01
normal Cadence for the person you're
00:09:02
talking to and what's out of the norm
00:09:03
the final example that I want to provide
00:09:05
in this section is after you and the
00:09:06
intj have hung out a few times and have
00:09:08
built a certain level of comfort example
00:09:10
number three is when the intj openly
00:09:12
takes care of you again mom extrovert
00:09:15
thinking shows that we care by making
00:09:16
your life as comfortable as possible if
00:09:18
you're at an event and there's not
00:09:19
enough chairs you're either going to
00:09:21
take the intj's chair or the ncu will
00:09:23
search for a chair for you to sit on at
00:09:24
the end of the day you're going to be
00:09:26
the one sitting on the more comfortable
00:09:27
chair if you're out eating with an intj
00:09:29
we're going to make sure you have the
00:09:30
last bite and we're gonna sell it by
00:09:32
saying oh we're already full we can't
00:09:33
take another bite which is a lie we just
00:09:35
want to make sure that you have the best
00:09:36
and last bite when you're in a group
00:09:38
setting and there's something that you
00:09:39
want to say but people be talking over
00:09:41
you the itj will make sure that you get
00:09:42
your opportunity to say what's on your
00:09:44
mind those are small gestures that most
00:09:45
people don't notice now let's look at
00:09:47
the more outwardly tangible gestures if
00:09:49
you mentioned the intj that you want to
00:09:50
read more books this year the intj will
00:09:52
compile a list for you from the best
00:09:54
sellers and all the books that we
00:09:55
believe that you might enjoy reading
00:09:57
because we want you to achieve your goal
00:09:59
if you mentioned that your windshield
00:10:00
wipers aren't working when it rains the
00:10:02
intj will buy windshield wipers and
00:10:03
replace it for you if not that they'll
00:10:06
make sure that your car goes in the shop
00:10:07
and that the problem is fixed if you're
00:10:09
at a rave or a concert together and
00:10:10
you're tired the intj will make sure
00:10:11
that you get to a place where you guys
00:10:13
are both comfortable so that you can
00:10:14
relax the whole point of this section is
00:10:15
that the intj will do whatever it takes
00:10:17
within our power to make sure you feel
00:10:18
comfortable don't forget that it has to
00:10:20
be consistent because the intj would do
00:10:21
this for the people that we we care
00:10:22
about as well but after a certain amount
00:10:24
of time we're going to tell them to have
00:10:25
to figure that out themselves at
00:10:26
this point of the video you might be
00:10:28
thinking to yourself hmm I don't think
00:10:29
there's any indication that can be more
00:10:31
clear than that another great
00:10:32
observation man you're on a roll today
00:10:34
and this is your lucky day because the
00:10:35
next section is going to go over
00:10:36
vulnerability and it's gonna be way more
00:10:38
clear when it comes down to intj and
00:10:40
interest it's like noticing sunshine on
00:10:42
a cloudless day let's get into it the
00:10:43
last section of this video is called
00:10:45
vulnerability because you have to be
00:10:46
very special to see the side of an intj
00:10:49
don't forget that order operation
00:10:50
matters you have to pass proximity and
00:10:52
consistency in order for you to get to
00:10:54
this level so if you haven't noticed
00:10:55
your intj doing this they're either not
00:10:57
interested in you or you haven't passed
00:10:59
the first two sections yet and that's
00:11:00
your job to figure out where you are in
00:11:02
your relationship with the intj also
00:11:04
make sure you don't rush ihj to get to
00:11:06
this section because the more pressure
00:11:07
you put on this the less we're going to
00:11:09
engage with you don't lose the intj for
00:11:11
not having patience vulnerability is
00:11:13
when an intj introduces you to Auntie
00:11:15
introverted feeling and baby extroverted
00:11:17
sensing in a nutshell this is when the
00:11:19
intj becomes playful this is the reason
00:11:21
why there's inconsistency sees in forms
00:11:23
when it comes down to intjs and
00:11:24
relationships people that dated intjs
00:11:26
talk about how aloof and playful we
00:11:28
actually are when we're in relationships
00:11:30
and this is completely different from
00:11:31
The Stereotype that you read about that
00:11:33
we always have a professional demeanor
00:11:34
this is the easiest way to tell if
00:11:35
someone actually dated an intj because
00:11:37
we are weird but fun as and
00:11:40
personally I think I'm hella fun today I
00:11:41
take people on all these adventures and
00:11:43
I dance with them whenever we're at a
00:11:44
concert whenever I'm comfortable around
00:11:46
someone no one else or nothing else
00:11:48
exists it's me and them let's start off
00:11:50
with easy examples when it comes down to
00:11:51
vulnerability example number one is when
00:11:54
the intj specifically tells you that
00:11:55
we're interested and this could be
00:11:57
either vocally or through text and since
00:11:58
it takes a while for an intj to fully
00:12:00
understand how we feel about a person
00:12:01
you're usually the person that tells us
00:12:03
first how you feel but we will never say
00:12:05
back until we actually truly mean it and
00:12:07
when intj say we're interested in you
00:12:08
that's essentially us giving you the
00:12:10
green light let's start being romantic
00:12:12
let's start doing romantic things and
00:12:14
it's really odd being in intj because we
00:12:15
have anti-introverted feeling which
00:12:17
means that we actually think about
00:12:18
romance but for some reason it also
00:12:21
makes us want to get bag at the exact
00:12:23
same time example number two the intj
00:12:25
becomes more physical around you intas
00:12:27
can be easily over stimulated by the
00:12:29
external World especially when it comes
00:12:30
down to physical touch intjs tend to be
00:12:32
those people where you notice they have
00:12:33
a bubble around themselves and when
00:12:35
someone passes the bubble we look
00:12:36
uncomfortable as hell we're not the type
00:12:38
of friends that give you big and long
00:12:39
hugs we're also not the type of friends
00:12:41
that put our arms around you whenever we
00:12:42
have something we want to tell you in
00:12:44
secret we may do those things but it's
00:12:46
more rare than it is normal and all that
00:12:48
changes when we're romantically invested
00:12:50
in you and the easiest analogy that I
00:12:52
can provide without going into much
00:12:53
detail is that the intj is a cat there's
00:12:56
no way in hell we're going to allow you
00:12:57
to pet us if we're not comfortable
00:12:58
around you and even if we're comfortable
00:12:59
around you you can only pet us until we
00:13:01
tell you to stop at that point don't
00:13:03
touch us anymore example number three
00:13:05
when it comes down to vulnerability is
00:13:06
that the itj starts flirting with you
00:13:08
since intjs are oblivious to social cues
00:13:10
we don't want to give the impression
00:13:12
that we're interested in someone when
00:13:13
we're really not also there are intjs
00:13:15
out there that never learn how to flirt
00:13:16
so it comes off creepy so when intj is
00:13:19
interested in you we're going to
00:13:20
reciprocate your advances but in a very
00:13:22
TJ way and the funny thing is I can't
00:13:23
really pinpoint exactly what that means
00:13:25
I know what it is I just can't really
00:13:28
put it in words so the way that I am
00:13:30
going to describe it in context this
00:13:32
video is that when an intj flirts with
00:13:34
you you could tell because of tension
00:13:35
and power dynamics is going to be very
00:13:37
subtle and it sounds like we're
00:13:38
challenging you but not in a
00:13:40
argumentative type of way it's more
00:13:42
along the lines of oh yeah you really
00:13:44
think you can make me do that it's going
00:13:45
to be very obvious and you'll notice it
00:13:46
when it happens because it's going to be
00:13:48
fun the final example that I have for
00:13:49
this video is that the intj will start
00:13:51
including you and our plans because
00:13:53
nothing is simple for an intj when we
00:13:55
start inviting you to our plans that
00:13:57
means we're showing you who we really
00:13:58
are our integers have lots of plans and
00:14:00
interests that we don't like to discuss
00:14:01
so when an intj consistently invites you
00:14:03
to do different things instead of every
00:14:05
Friday night going to board game night
00:14:07
that means we're into you not only is
00:14:08
the intj enjoying your company and
00:14:10
wanting to show who we really are we
00:14:12
need Clarity to see whether you can
00:14:13
perform in certain situations that
00:14:15
you're not comfortable with whether it's
00:14:16
engaging with people you're not aware of
00:14:18
engaging in different social activities
00:14:20
or just being in an area that you
00:14:22
normally don't do such as hiking
00:14:24
swimming whatever because all those
00:14:25
examples tied into one thing can the
00:14:27
intj comfortably be ourselves around you
00:14:29
and in this example I'm also going to
00:14:31
group in that the itj is going to start
00:14:34
showing ourselves to you it could be
00:14:36
something as simple as telling you a
00:14:37
childhood story that affected our lives
00:14:39
or something less obvious such as intj
00:14:41
listening to music around you that we
00:14:43
love that there's no way in hell we will
00:14:45
listen around other people lastly I feel
00:14:47
like you should already know where you
00:14:48
stand with the intj once you get to this
00:14:50
point you two will probably hang out
00:14:51
pretty frequently at this point and
00:14:52
develop a level of comfort that the intj
00:14:54
doesn't have with anyone else but if
00:14:56
you're not aware yet this is me telling
00:14:58
you yes the intj is interested in you
00:15:01
and that ladies and gentlemen is the end
00:15:02
of this video and as always don't forget
00:15:04
to like the video and subscribe to this
00:15:05
channel for more content I actually had
00:15:07
to write the script three different
00:15:07
times because I either felt as if I
00:15:09
wasn't descriptive enough or it didn't
00:15:11
do the topic Justice and having Auntie
00:15:13
introverted feeling I won't allow myself
00:15:15
to put out a video that I'm not proud of
00:15:17
even if it still achieves the same
00:15:19
outcome I feel like I'm doing an intj
00:15:21
dating series at this point the previous
00:15:23
videos were about intjs being single now
00:15:25
I'm going to who the integers are gonna
00:15:27
like so stay tuned because your type
00:15:30
might be coming up next thanks again for
00:15:31
watching my video
00:15:33
bye
