Charli D’Amelio: When I Hit 100M Followers I Was At My Lowest Mentally… @CharlidAmelio

01:32:59
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Imz9Opijg5w

Résumé

TLDREn aquest episodi del podcast, la convidada, una jove famosa que va guanyar popularitat a través de TikTok, comparteix les seves experiències i desafiaments al ser a l'ull públic. Parla sobre com la seva vida ha canviat radicalment des que es va fer famosa, incloent-hi l'atenció constant al seu aspecte, el que diu, i com això ha afectat la seva salut emocional. Reflecteix sobre el suport de la seva família i com ha tingut el repte de mantenir la seva identitat personal i autoestima enmig de la crítica pública. També discuteix com intenta mantenir-se humil tot i l'èxit, i explora la seva pròpia identitat separada de la imatge pública. A més, parla sobre la importància de l'autoacceptació i del creixement personal i de la seva nova trobada amb activitats com netejar i cuidar els seus gossos per trobar alegria en les petites coses quotidianes. Al llarg de l'episodi, es reflexiona sobre el balanç necessari entre la vida privada i pública, especialment quan es té una carrera en auge a les xarxes socials.

A retenir

  • 🌟 La fama pot ser un canvi sobtat i aclaparador.
  • 💬 Els comentaris negatius poden impactar emocionalment malgrat les aparences.
  • 🧠 És important descobrir i mantenir la pròpia identitat personal.
  • 👪 El suport familiar és essencial per mantenir l'equilibri emocional.
  • 💕 L'autoacceptació ajuda a afrontar la pressió pública.
  • 🎭 La imatge pública sovint no reflecteix la persona real.
  • 🐾 Trobar alegria en coses senzilles ajuda a equilibrar l'estrès.
  • 🏡 Tenir espais privats on un pot ser autèntic és fonamental.
  • 🕊️ Mantenir-se humil malgrat l'èxit és un repte constant.
  • 🎶 Les passions com la dansa poden ser una sortida emocional.

Chronologie

  • 00:00:00 - 00:05:00

    En aquest fragment, l'autor reflexiona sobre com el seu estatus públic va canviar de sobte, passant de ser ignorat a ser el centre d'atenció. Reconeix la dificultat d'afrontar les crítiques malgrat l'aparent indiferència que mostrava al públic, i admet la confusió sobre la seva identitat.

  • 00:05:00 - 00:10:00

    El presentador convida a l'audiència a subscriure's al seu podcast, destacant la importància del suport de la comunitat. A continuació, l'entrevistat elogia l'habilitat i la dedicació de la convidada, suggerint que el seu èxit a TikTok és el resultat d'anys de treball dur.

  • 00:10:00 - 00:15:00

    La convidada reflexiona sobre com percebre el seu èxit com a sort pot afectar la seva autoestima. Malgrat sentir que no mereix l'èxit, recorda la importància de separar la seva imatge pública de la seva identitat real per mantenir-se alineada amb qui és.

  • 00:15:00 - 00:20:00

    Esmenta com els assoliments en 'Dancing with the Stars' i els 'Kids Choice Awards' la van fer sentir realment orgullosa de si mateixa, destacant la separació entre l'imatge pública i la seva autèntica personalitat. La maduració i l'acceptació personal són processos continus.

  • 00:20:00 - 00:25:00

    La invitada explica la dificultat de ser autèntica donada la pressió pública i de les xarxes socials, on una publicació pot desencadenar una reacció exagerada. Subratlla la importància de reconnectar amb un mateix per sobreviure a aquestes expectatives externes.

  • 00:25:00 - 00:30:00

    Es detallen els desafiaments d’haver crescut ràpidament en l’atenció pública i com això va portar a una introspecció personal. La separació entre la seva persona en línia i la seva identitat real continua sent una lluita constant.

  • 00:30:00 - 00:35:00

    Continua discutint amb el presentador sobre la lluita per establir una vida equilibrada entre la seva imatge pública i la seva vida personal privada. Això inclou trobar comoditat en les amistats genuïnes i incorporar autèntiques experiències de vida.

  • 00:35:00 - 00:40:00

    La convidada troba alegria en les petites coses, com passar temps amb els seus gossos, centrant-se en allò que és personalment significatiu i no condicionat per les expectatives externes. Això li proporciona estabilitat emocional i satisfacció.

  • 00:40:00 - 00:45:00

    Reflexiona sobre la importància de les relacions que aporten suport i comprensió autèntica, allunyant-se d'amistats superficials. Tingueu una comunitat de suport sembla reforçar la seva seguretat en si mateixa.

  • 00:45:00 - 00:50:00

    La invitada descriu com la seva percepció personal ha evolucionat gràcies a la distància del soroll social i a la reflexió sobre el que realment valora, com les relacions autèntiques i les experiències personals significatives.

  • 00:50:00 - 00:55:00

    Examina la complexitat d’estar constantment observada, i com això ha modelat la seva supervivència i resposta emocional. L'autoconeixement i la cura personal esdevenen centrals.

  • 00:55:00 - 01:00:00

    Enfronta les realitats i exigències de la fama, particularment com això afecta la seva relació. Subratlla la necessitat de comunicació i comprensió tant en la seva vida professional com personal.

  • 01:00:00 - 01:05:00

    La conversa aprofundeix en l’impacte de fer públics els aspectes privats de la seva vida, com les emocions o problemes familiars. L’enfocament és com la fama i la visualització massiva poden distorsionar històries.

  • 01:05:00 - 01:10:00

    Exploren el tema de la separació d’identitats: persona pública versus privada. Explica que una part important de la seva salut mental reposa en aquesta separació.

  • 01:10:00 - 01:15:00

    Continuen parlant sobre la pressió constant a la vida pública i com l'establiment i manteniment de límits personals i professionals són crucials.

  • 01:15:00 - 01:20:00

    Reflexiona sobre la importància de reevaluar constantment les relacions, incloent familiars i amics, per determinar què és saludable i què cal deixar enrere.

  • 01:20:00 - 01:25:00

    Acaba amb la idea que preservar una identitat separada del públic li permet existir segons les seves pròpies regles. Això inclou activitats que reconcilien les seves passions amb el que el públic espera.

  • 01:25:00 - 01:32:59

    El diàleg es tanca explorant noves prioritats personals i professionals, enfocant-se en un viatge continu de descobriment personal i de recreació de si mateixa, mentre gestiona les expectatives socials.

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Carte mentale

Mind Map

Questions fréquemment posées

  • De què tracta aquest episodi del podcast?

    Aquest episodi tracta sobre les experiències personals d'una famosa amb la fama i les xarxes socials, i com això ha afectat la seva vida personal.

  • Com ha afectat la fama a la seva vida personal?

    La fama ha provocat canvis dràstics en la seva vida, incloent-hi l'atenció constant i les crítiques que rep, cosa que afecta la seva salut emocional.

  • Quina és la seva relació amb les xarxes socials?

    Encara que al principi gaudia de les xarxes socials, les crítiques i l'expectativa pública l'han fet replantejar-se la seva presència en elles.

  • Com maneja les crítiques i els comentaris negatius?

    Encara que diu que els comentaris negatius no l'afecten, admet que hi ha moments en què realment li impacten i li provoquen tristesa.

  • Com descriu la seva identitat actual?

    Encara està en procés de descobrir qui és realment, diferenciant-se de la imatge pública que la gent projecta d'ella.

  • Quina importància té el suport emocional per a ella?

    És fonamental i agraeix tenir amics i família que li donen suport emocional, ajudant-la a mantenir-se equilibrada.

  • Quins aspectes de la seva vida sembla que més la preocupen?

    La pressió de mantenir una imatge publica coherent i la dificultat d'encaixar la seva vida personal dins d'aquesta imatge la preocupen significativament.

  • Quines iniciatives o activitats l'ajuden a mantenir-se centrada?

    Activitats com la dansa l'ajuden a expressar-se i mantenir un equilibri emocional, proporcionant-li una sortida creativa.

  • Ha comentat alguna vegada considerar parar o allunyar-se de la fama?

    Sí, ha considerat prendre descansos o allunyar-se temporalment per cuidar de la seva salut mental.

  • Quin consell ofereix per a altres joves que també busquen l'èxit en les xarxes socials?

    Aconsella ser autèntics, mantenir un bon suport emocional i ser conscients de la salut mental en enfrontar crítiques.

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  • 00:00:00
    it was one day no one cared what I did
  • 00:00:02
    no one cared what I wore what I looked
  • 00:00:04
    like what I said and then all of a
  • 00:00:06
    sudden that was all anyone would talk
  • 00:00:08
    about I think back to some of the things
  • 00:00:10
    that I said in interviews yeah hate
  • 00:00:12
    comments don't bother me and I was like
  • 00:00:14
    you went home and cried all night
  • 00:00:16
    because of it while filming season 3 our
  • 00:00:18
    entire family was going through a lot
  • 00:00:21
    it's hard to watch back those episodes I
  • 00:00:23
    say I don't know to everything but the
  • 00:00:25
    thing is I don't know who I am
  • 00:00:30
    before we jump into this episode I'd
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    like to invite you to join this
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    community to hear more interviews that
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    will help you become happier healthier
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    and more healed all I want you to do is
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    click on the Subscribe button I love
  • 00:00:42
    your support it's incredible to see all
  • 00:00:44
    your comments and we're just getting
  • 00:00:46
    started I can't wait to go on this
  • 00:00:48
    journey with you thank you so much for
  • 00:00:50
    subscribing it means the world to me the
  • 00:00:52
    bestselling author and host the number
  • 00:00:54
    one Health and Wellness podcast on
  • 00:00:56
    purpose with J
  • 00:00:58
    shett I want to say this to you because
  • 00:01:00
    I don't think I've ever talked about
  • 00:01:01
    this with you but you come up in more
  • 00:01:04
    conversations or when I'm doing Keynotes
  • 00:01:07
    on stages and it's really funny because
  • 00:01:10
    I kind of think of you randomly and
  • 00:01:12
    often I want to share this with you I've
  • 00:01:13
    never said this to you and it comes up
  • 00:01:15
    because I have watched your journey from
  • 00:01:18
    afar as everyone has for such a long
  • 00:01:20
    time and I've really deeply admired just
  • 00:01:23
    how phenomenally skilled you are at what
  • 00:01:25
    you do I think you're a phenomenal
  • 00:01:27
    dancer you're an incredible performer
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    thank you and if I'm ever presenting or
  • 00:01:31
    talking to anyone about social media or
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    digital or whatever is I always bring
  • 00:01:35
    your name up because I think you're one
  • 00:01:37
    of those people that obviously got your
  • 00:01:40
    moment on Tik Tok when it took off and
  • 00:01:42
    everything but I feel like there were
  • 00:01:44
    just years and years of practice and
  • 00:01:46
    hard work that went behind it that we
  • 00:01:48
    don't always see and I just I just
  • 00:01:50
    wanted to share that with you as we kick
  • 00:01:51
    off today that I think it's incredible
  • 00:01:53
    and I think you've been practicing for
  • 00:01:55
    this life that you live since you were
  • 00:01:57
    like four years old and so I I always
  • 00:02:00
    try and highlight that and so I don't
  • 00:02:01
    know I I think of you in that context
  • 00:02:03
    often so no thank you I mean I
  • 00:02:05
    appreciate that I think when it comes to
  • 00:02:08
    social media it's very easy to get on
  • 00:02:10
    yourself and say it was just luck but to
  • 00:02:13
    hear that from someone like you is
  • 00:02:15
    definitely you know puts it into a
  • 00:02:17
    different perspective that I don't
  • 00:02:19
    always let myself feel which is really
  • 00:02:22
    nice good I'm glad thank you do you
  • 00:02:24
    still kind of kid yourself and just say
  • 00:02:26
    it's luck to yourself now after all
  • 00:02:28
    these years do you still feel that way I
  • 00:02:30
    do and I think that you know having that
  • 00:02:34
    in the back of my mind definitely keeps
  • 00:02:36
    me a little bit more humble and helps me
  • 00:02:40
    you know this wasn't something that I
  • 00:02:44
    was asking for looking for but I mean
  • 00:02:47
    I've all like my entire life I've been
  • 00:02:52
    filming videos whether it's like I was
  • 00:02:55
    10 and look at how I do this or this how
  • 00:02:58
    I do my makeup like always just making
  • 00:03:01
    videos that was always something I loved
  • 00:03:03
    and I never shared them with anyone
  • 00:03:05
    until Tik Tok so it's really it's crazy
  • 00:03:08
    to think back about those times and how
  • 00:03:11
    they probably really did help me get to
  • 00:03:13
    where I am now I love what you said that
  • 00:03:15
    luck or viewing your success as luck
  • 00:03:18
    helps you stay humble I think that's
  • 00:03:20
    such a beautiful trait and quality to
  • 00:03:22
    Aspire for and to always practice at the
  • 00:03:25
    same time though I'm guessing that when
  • 00:03:27
    you see it through the lens of luck
  • 00:03:30
    sometimes it can affect your self-esteem
  • 00:03:32
    or selfworth because you're like oh I
  • 00:03:34
    just got lucky and maybe I don't deserve
  • 00:03:36
    this I don't know if those thoughts come
  • 00:03:38
    up at the same time as trying to stay
  • 00:03:39
    humble there's this side of like low
  • 00:03:42
    self-esteem that we all go through I
  • 00:03:44
    mean absolutely I think it's hard not to
  • 00:03:47
    feel that way especially a lot of my
  • 00:03:49
    journey was everyone telling me that I
  • 00:03:54
    didn't deserve it kind of feeding into
  • 00:03:57
    that and it's starting to really affect
  • 00:03:59
    you know how I think about myself do I
  • 00:04:01
    deserve anything why am I where I am I
  • 00:04:03
    don't do anything special I'm not
  • 00:04:06
    different than anyone there's millions
  • 00:04:08
    of people that would probably be better
  • 00:04:10
    at my job than I am but somehow it's me
  • 00:04:14
    and you know I kind of try
  • 00:04:18
    and separate myself online from who I am
  • 00:04:21
    in person I always like to say it's
  • 00:04:23
    Charli demilio who everyone else sees
  • 00:04:25
    and Charlie who I am when it's just me
  • 00:04:29
    and you know you really have to
  • 00:04:32
    appreciate the things that you work hard
  • 00:04:35
    for because I feel like those are the
  • 00:04:37
    moments where I really do feel proud of
  • 00:04:39
    myself because I don't always even when
  • 00:04:42
    achieving these amazing things I'm like
  • 00:04:44
    well it's not really me it's the people
  • 00:04:47
    that are watching me that got me here
  • 00:04:49
    you know like they could have done this
  • 00:04:50
    to anyone but when it comes to things
  • 00:04:53
    like Dancing with the Stars or hosting
  • 00:04:56
    the Kids Choice Awards like those were
  • 00:04:58
    two of probably my favorite
  • 00:05:01
    accomplishments of mine because I really
  • 00:05:03
    felt like I had to work for that and it
  • 00:05:07
    was just moments where I I really truly
  • 00:05:11
    felt proud of myself and I don't feel
  • 00:05:13
    like that very often I'm so glad that
  • 00:05:16
    you shared that with us because yeah
  • 00:05:18
    it's it's interesting isn't it it's like
  • 00:05:20
    the reason why you did so well on both
  • 00:05:23
    of those is because you've done it for
  • 00:05:25
    years and years and years but sometimes
  • 00:05:27
    you need to have a moment where you're
  • 00:05:29
    working hard on one specific thing so
  • 00:05:31
    that you can see it how long did it take
  • 00:05:33
    you to make
  • 00:05:36
    this awareness of like there's Charlie
  • 00:05:38
    demilio and then there's Charlie like
  • 00:05:40
    how long did it take you to figure that
  • 00:05:41
    out for yourself and to even explain it
  • 00:05:44
    in that way yeah it definitely took
  • 00:05:47
    me a while I always knew in the back of
  • 00:05:50
    my mind I was like I would do certain
  • 00:05:53
    brand deals or ads and they'd have this
  • 00:05:55
    creative and I do it and I put on this
  • 00:05:58
    like super happy smiley like obviously
  • 00:06:01
    catering to a younger audience which I
  • 00:06:03
    love doing but that's not who I am at
  • 00:06:06
    heart and I think growing up and I
  • 00:06:09
    started this when I was what 15 years
  • 00:06:11
    old and then I was turning 17 and 18 and
  • 00:06:14
    I was you know getting tattoos and I
  • 00:06:17
    would curse and everyone would be like
  • 00:06:19
    whoa this is crazy and I was like this
  • 00:06:21
    is what I do in my normal day-to-day
  • 00:06:23
    life like this is who I am so I really
  • 00:06:26
    just had to the version that people
  • 00:06:29
    don't like isn't even me you know it's
  • 00:06:32
    what they nitpick out of certain things
  • 00:06:34
    that I do and I think coming to that
  • 00:06:37
    realization honestly over the past few
  • 00:06:40
    months maybe this past year I think has
  • 00:06:42
    been probably one of the most helpful
  • 00:06:44
    things to not let what other people say
  • 00:06:47
    get to me I empathize and feel so
  • 00:06:50
    compassionate for how difficult that
  • 00:06:51
    could be to be that young and to have
  • 00:06:54
    millions and millions and millions of
  • 00:06:55
    people having an opinion on everything
  • 00:06:58
    from what you wear to what you say to
  • 00:07:00
    what you do and who you date and just
  • 00:07:03
    everything right like I can't imagine
  • 00:07:05
    being your age and being put under a
  • 00:07:08
    magnifying glass like in the way you
  • 00:07:10
    have which I think is also very unique
  • 00:07:12
    because I think Tik Tok put people under
  • 00:07:15
    a magnifying glass in a way that it also
  • 00:07:17
    never been done before it's like a first
  • 00:07:19
    time thing so what has changed
  • 00:07:22
    about then 15 and you're only 18 now so
  • 00:07:26
    it's only been 3 years right 19 19 now
  • 00:07:29
    you're it's been years in those four
  • 00:07:32
    years what
  • 00:07:33
    has what would you say is the
  • 00:07:36
    biggest change that you've seen
  • 00:07:39
    in who you thought you were then and who
  • 00:07:42
    you are now I think I just you know I
  • 00:07:46
    was in high school it was one day no one
  • 00:07:49
    cared what I did no one cared what I
  • 00:07:51
    wore what I looked like what I said and
  • 00:07:54
    then all of a sudden that was all anyone
  • 00:07:56
    would talk about it it happened so fast
  • 00:07:59
    and I put up a a shield to kind of
  • 00:08:02
    protect myself which helped me but also
  • 00:08:06
    hurt me a little bit because it was hard
  • 00:08:08
    to get out of that shell and I mean I
  • 00:08:12
    think back to some of the things that I
  • 00:08:14
    said in interviews like three years ago
  • 00:08:17
    yeah hate comments don't bother me and I
  • 00:08:19
    was like you went home and cried all
  • 00:08:21
    night because of it like I would say
  • 00:08:23
    things to make people think one thing
  • 00:08:26
    but inside I was very
  • 00:08:30
    sheltered and I went through a a pretty
  • 00:08:34
    big stage for maybe like the first two
  • 00:08:37
    years where I always looked out for the
  • 00:08:40
    best in people and I got myself hurt a
  • 00:08:42
    lot you know people wanted to make
  • 00:08:45
    videos together and and they would
  • 00:08:47
    invite me over for collabs and then they
  • 00:08:50
    would all hang out and I wouldn't be
  • 00:08:51
    invited and I would I would be so
  • 00:08:53
    confused and the excuse was always
  • 00:08:56
    you're too young or you know whatever
  • 00:08:58
    and I was like you guys are just hanging
  • 00:08:59
    out at a house like how am I too young
  • 00:09:01
    for that but not too young to have in
  • 00:09:03
    all your videos and it took a lot of you
  • 00:09:08
    know distancing myself a lot of talking
  • 00:09:13
    to my family going to therapy you know
  • 00:09:16
    figuring out who I am outside of anyone
  • 00:09:19
    watching
  • 00:09:21
    to be a little bit more content with
  • 00:09:24
    myself and understand that I don't need
  • 00:09:27
    to have all of these people people like
  • 00:09:29
    me you know I'm fine on my own I love
  • 00:09:33
    being by myself I'm fine with the
  • 00:09:34
    friends that I have in my corner that
  • 00:09:36
    I've had for years are the new friends
  • 00:09:39
    that come into my life that actually
  • 00:09:41
    love me for me and you know there's
  • 00:09:45
    nothing that I can do I feel like now
  • 00:09:49
    I'm kind of at a point
  • 00:09:51
    where you know whatever like that's kind
  • 00:09:55
    of my motto I always am just like all
  • 00:09:57
    right okay I don't I don't know I don't
  • 00:09:59
    care
  • 00:09:59
    and focusing more on the things that
  • 00:10:01
    really matter to me like it sounds so
  • 00:10:03
    lame cuz I constantly talk about my dogs
  • 00:10:05
    like they're my children but literally
  • 00:10:08
    like spending the day with them taking
  • 00:10:10
    care of them my responsibility being
  • 00:10:12
    them and not myself I don't have to
  • 00:10:15
    worry about work or anything they don't
  • 00:10:17
    care if I have a million followers or
  • 00:10:19
    none like I don't know just focusing
  • 00:10:21
    more on the things that actually matter
  • 00:10:24
    the fans that actually love me no matter
  • 00:10:26
    what like have been there for years or
  • 00:10:29
    brand new and actually like who I am and
  • 00:10:32
    not just what I put out you know yeah
  • 00:10:36
    and it's and it's so hard because so
  • 00:10:39
    much of what you put out is you or is a
  • 00:10:42
    part of you and it can feel like the
  • 00:10:44
    biggest part of you because it gets the
  • 00:10:46
    biggest response yeah and it's it's
  • 00:10:48
    almost confusing in your brain to be
  • 00:10:50
    like when you're with your dogs M it's a
  • 00:10:53
    small part of your life or there's a
  • 00:10:55
    small amount of people there but it's
  • 00:10:56
    actually a bigger yeah bigger importance
  • 00:10:59
    or big significance to you cuz I have so
  • 00:11:02
    much life that no one sees I have so
  • 00:11:05
    much about me that no one knows about
  • 00:11:08
    and I'm fine with that you know I don't
  • 00:11:12
    feel like I need to change myself for
  • 00:11:15
    anyone because I've I did that for so
  • 00:11:18
    long and it was so exhausting and I
  • 00:11:20
    worked so much while being so burnt out
  • 00:11:24
    and just wanting to kind of get away
  • 00:11:28
    from everyone yeah that now what I want
  • 00:11:32
    to do is definitely a lot more important
  • 00:11:34
    than what everyone's telling me to do
  • 00:11:36
    and that's and that's really tough like
  • 00:11:38
    when I've spoken to even like young M
  • 00:11:41
    musicians and and music stars it's like
  • 00:11:44
    most people get their break when they're
  • 00:11:45
    like 15 years old or something like that
  • 00:11:47
    and naturally everyone's older than you
  • 00:11:49
    and as a 15-year-old you're used to
  • 00:11:51
    having parents or people older than you
  • 00:11:53
    telling you what to do and so whether
  • 00:11:54
    it's your manager or whether it's your
  • 00:11:56
    agent or your team or whatever it is
  • 00:11:58
    they book you you and then you're doing
  • 00:12:00
    what they say cuz you're doing what the
  • 00:12:01
    adults say it's kind of normal and now
  • 00:12:03
    that you're an adult yourself you're
  • 00:12:05
    kind of like trying to take that back
  • 00:12:08
    what was it that you felt you did that
  • 00:12:10
    wasn't you or that you felt you were
  • 00:12:12
    doing because the adults are saying to
  • 00:12:13
    do it or what were those things that you
  • 00:12:15
    felt like you moved away from who you
  • 00:12:17
    wanted to be or who you were I think I
  • 00:12:21
    you know for quite some time tried to
  • 00:12:26
    just do whatever anyone said to make
  • 00:12:29
    them like me whether it was how I
  • 00:12:31
    dressed or how I talked or what I said
  • 00:12:34
    anything what type of videos I make I
  • 00:12:36
    was listening to every comment whether
  • 00:12:38
    it was
  • 00:12:39
    like I hate that hoodie well I'm never
  • 00:12:41
    wearing that again like this person
  • 00:12:43
    doesn't like it and dictating every
  • 00:12:45
    decision I made through what other
  • 00:12:48
    people said and I mean
  • 00:12:52
    for a long time the beginning um I was
  • 00:12:58
    only surrounded by a bunch of adults and
  • 00:13:02
    25-year-olds and all of this stuff and
  • 00:13:06
    they would always say how mature I am
  • 00:13:09
    but I was just trying to fit in you know
  • 00:13:13
    I was still in high school still like
  • 00:13:16
    you know you want to be with the cool
  • 00:13:18
    kids so the people that I thought was
  • 00:13:20
    cool I would do anything to be like them
  • 00:13:22
    you know dress different every day or or
  • 00:13:25
    speak about specific things or try to
  • 00:13:28
    sound cool or change myself and it's
  • 00:13:31
    just so not worth it cuz why why am I
  • 00:13:35
    going to do that and how long am I going
  • 00:13:37
    to do that until they realize that it's
  • 00:13:40
    like okay we get it like you like
  • 00:13:42
    whatever we like you don't have to do
  • 00:13:44
    that you know it's just I think it's
  • 00:13:48
    it's so unfair to yourself
  • 00:13:50
    to have to do that all the time I love
  • 00:13:54
    that I love that you use that word
  • 00:13:55
    unfair yeah it's almost like it's just
  • 00:13:58
    unfair to do that to yourself that that
  • 00:14:00
    really hit me and resonated with me
  • 00:14:02
    because it's it's almost like you're
  • 00:14:05
    just doing yourself such a big
  • 00:14:07
    disservice by molding yourself into what
  • 00:14:11
    you think someone wants and that was
  • 00:14:12
    just a thought they had on one day in
  • 00:14:15
    one second in one comment and then and
  • 00:14:17
    then you have no idea who you are I I
  • 00:14:20
    had to sit with myself and say I have no
  • 00:14:23
    idea what I like I have no idea how I
  • 00:14:25
    want to dress I have no idea how I want
  • 00:14:27
    to do my makeup or what's my favorite
  • 00:14:29
    song or what's my favorite movie I just
  • 00:14:33
    I don't know like I do not know anything
  • 00:14:36
    about myself and my answer to every
  • 00:14:38
    question was I don't know and I actually
  • 00:14:42
    had to talk to my therapist about this
  • 00:14:44
    and I was like I say I don't know to
  • 00:14:46
    everything but the thing is I really
  • 00:14:49
    don't know I don't know who I am I feel
  • 00:14:52
    like all I know is what anyone tells me
  • 00:14:55
    to do and I mean it's
  • 00:15:00
    it's a really weird feeling because how
  • 00:15:02
    do you get out of that how do you find
  • 00:15:04
    out what you like but you really just
  • 00:15:07
    have to try things get out of your house
  • 00:15:10
    I was not leaving my
  • 00:15:12
    house ever like I would go through these
  • 00:15:15
    phases where I don't want anyone to talk
  • 00:15:16
    to me I don't want to do anything I just
  • 00:15:18
    want to stay in my room all day watch TV
  • 00:15:21
    like not get ready nothing and I've been
  • 00:15:25
    really low a couple times and I think
  • 00:15:29
    this Pastime that I got really low was
  • 00:15:31
    when I was like okay my parents even
  • 00:15:34
    said they were like We're Not Gonna Let
  • 00:15:36
    You we're not going to sit here and
  • 00:15:38
    watch you rot in bed all day and not do
  • 00:15:41
    anything and just like we can't do that
  • 00:15:46
    that's so unfair and especially when you
  • 00:15:47
    don't live with your parents and they're
  • 00:15:49
    noticing that it's an issue so I had to
  • 00:15:53
    kind of really dig deep and ask the
  • 00:15:55
    questions
  • 00:15:56
    that I didn't ask for so long for
  • 00:15:59
    whatever reason maybe I didn't want to
  • 00:16:01
    know the answer or it was too much or
  • 00:16:03
    scary to figure it out and be your own
  • 00:16:06
    person but I think it's just so much
  • 00:16:10
    easier and I and I think it's also just
  • 00:16:14
    you know being it's really hard when
  • 00:16:16
    you're living your own journey and then
  • 00:16:19
    you realize as you're getting older and
  • 00:16:22
    as you are maturing as as everyone does
  • 00:16:24
    you're looking back going I can't really
  • 00:16:26
    expect my 15-year-old self to know all
  • 00:16:28
    this this anyway like I think you know
  • 00:16:31
    for me when I think about being back to
  • 00:16:33
    15 and I didn't know anything about
  • 00:16:35
    myself and I wasn't dealing with the
  • 00:16:36
    pressures you dealt with or the
  • 00:16:38
    challenges that you had and sure I had
  • 00:16:42
    different challenges and different
  • 00:16:43
    stresses as I'm sure everyone does has
  • 00:16:45
    their own thing but the point is that as
  • 00:16:48
    a 15-year-old self you don't really know
  • 00:16:49
    what you like anyway because it is true
  • 00:16:51
    you are trying to be with the cool kids
  • 00:16:53
    or you are trying to be like the other
  • 00:16:54
    people and you're getting involved in
  • 00:16:56
    all sorts of things just for people to
  • 00:16:57
    give you approval and valate you and
  • 00:17:00
    then all of a sudden it's amazing that
  • 00:17:02
    you're now coming to that point where
  • 00:17:03
    you're like I want to know and I think
  • 00:17:05
    what I love about what you said is and
  • 00:17:07
    it's because I said this often in my
  • 00:17:08
    books and my work is that knowing what
  • 00:17:11
    movies you like what foods you like what
  • 00:17:13
    songs you like that is the beginning of
  • 00:17:14
    self-awareness like it's that basic it's
  • 00:17:17
    it's not this
  • 00:17:18
    complicated Deep thing that it begins
  • 00:17:21
    with it really starts with those things
  • 00:17:23
    it starts with these really simple
  • 00:17:25
    everyday choices that we all have to
  • 00:17:27
    make so I want to ask you simple
  • 00:17:29
    everyday choices what is it now that
  • 00:17:31
    Charlie likes like what is it that
  • 00:17:33
    Charlie has discovered that not Charlie
  • 00:17:35
    demilio but Charlie enjoys and
  • 00:17:37
    appreciates that what are the joys of
  • 00:17:39
    life that your dogs obviously you
  • 00:17:40
    mention but what are some of the things
  • 00:17:42
    that brings you Joy that you feel you're
  • 00:17:44
    discovering for the first time things
  • 00:17:47
    that bring me joy I love cleaning that's
  • 00:17:51
    something that sounds so lame but is so
  • 00:17:53
    therapeutic I love um what about
  • 00:17:56
    cleaning cuz I want to know I want to
  • 00:17:59
    know now the way you said that was so
  • 00:18:00
    much genuiness I'm like all right what
  • 00:18:02
    about cleaning honestly to me it's just
  • 00:18:06
    therapeutic like put something on my TV
  • 00:18:08
    clean my room organize my stuff make it
  • 00:18:13
    how I like it you know because there can
  • 00:18:15
    be certain things that oh well you know
  • 00:18:20
    this is cool I guess I like this but
  • 00:18:23
    what picture do I want out what am I
  • 00:18:26
    proud of and want presented how do I
  • 00:18:28
    like my bed made how do I like my
  • 00:18:31
    Chargers to be set up it's like such
  • 00:18:33
    minuscule things that I think make such
  • 00:18:35
    a difference and it also makes you feel
  • 00:18:38
    productive and makes me feel like I have
  • 00:18:40
    my stuff together and I mean as someone
  • 00:18:44
    who struggles with obsessive compulsive
  • 00:18:47
    disorder that's one of my like big
  • 00:18:50
    things where I feel like when I'm doing
  • 00:18:51
    that I'm almost clearing my head so I
  • 00:18:54
    don't know it's just something that I
  • 00:18:56
    genuinely enjoy doing and I think is
  • 00:18:58
    super fun like this morning cuz I've had
  • 00:19:00
    such bad jet lag I was like okay I can
  • 00:19:03
    either try to go to sleep for the next 3
  • 00:19:05
    hours or get up and clean the kitchen
  • 00:19:09
    and play with the dogs and I was like
  • 00:19:11
    all right let's just get up and do it
  • 00:19:13
    you know I'll get up in 5 minutes and
  • 00:19:17
    we'll start to do this stuff you order
  • 00:19:18
    your coffee and do all the things that
  • 00:19:20
    you need to do to feel together and that
  • 00:19:22
    made me happy and I was really proud I
  • 00:19:24
    did that and I started my day on a great
  • 00:19:27
    note and now I feel great so it's just
  • 00:19:29
    like little things that I just I find so
  • 00:19:32
    much fun in mhm yeah no I I mean the
  • 00:19:35
    team will attested this too I'm like
  • 00:19:37
    addicted to organizing shelves and
  • 00:19:39
    bookshelves so I'll take you to the
  • 00:19:41
    house afterwards and I have like I have
  • 00:19:43
    this bookshelf in there that I
  • 00:19:44
    personally curated and like everything
  • 00:19:46
    and like even if my wife moves one book
  • 00:19:49
    I'll notice it and I'll be like where's
  • 00:19:50
    that book going but it's like I get that
  • 00:19:53
    like organizing spaces and creating
  • 00:19:56
    spaces to be spaces you want to live in
  • 00:19:58
    and sit in like even this room right now
  • 00:20:00
    like I curated it because I want to be
  • 00:20:02
    in this space and I want it to feel
  • 00:20:04
    comfortable for my guests and for myself
  • 00:20:06
    and I want it to also spark curiosity or
  • 00:20:08
    whatever it may be and I think it's
  • 00:20:10
    interesting how all these tiny things
  • 00:20:12
    when you're intentional about them they
  • 00:20:14
    can spark so much joy without trying
  • 00:20:16
    that hard and I mean it might be a
  • 00:20:19
    little bit of
  • 00:20:20
    like the very few parts of my life that
  • 00:20:23
    I genuinely get to control you know it's
  • 00:20:26
    not up to anyone else it's not you know
  • 00:20:30
    do it this way or wear this or show this
  • 00:20:34
    product it's like I just get to do this
  • 00:20:36
    and make it how I want the way I want it
  • 00:20:39
    on my own schedule and I'm fully in
  • 00:20:42
    control of this task start to finish
  • 00:20:45
    which you know yeah it's a way to deal
  • 00:20:48
    with being a little bit of a control
  • 00:20:50
    freak no and you're right I think that's
  • 00:20:52
    such a great point it's rare that we
  • 00:20:54
    have that much certainty and control
  • 00:20:57
    over anything in life
  • 00:20:59
    and if we don't do it at home we're
  • 00:21:01
    going to potentially try and do it
  • 00:21:02
    everywhere else where we can't and no I
  • 00:21:04
    think that's a great point what else
  • 00:21:05
    would you say that you've discovered
  • 00:21:07
    about your likes and dislikes like what
  • 00:21:08
    was something that you thought you liked
  • 00:21:10
    before or someone had told you to like
  • 00:21:12
    before and now you're like uh I you
  • 00:21:15
    change now like that's not how I feel
  • 00:21:17
    about it o um there's definitely a few
  • 00:21:20
    I'd say one thing that I started to
  • 00:21:25
    specifically like my own way was music I
  • 00:21:29
    you know would listen to whatever's
  • 00:21:31
    popular and I feel like now I really
  • 00:21:33
    only listen to the songs that I
  • 00:21:35
    genuinely enjoy listening to or I relate
  • 00:21:37
    to and even if it's the most random
  • 00:21:40
    playlist ever where it's like rap sad
  • 00:21:43
    music country music like allinone I
  • 00:21:46
    enjoy listening to that and I don't have
  • 00:21:48
    to listen to whatever everyone else is
  • 00:21:51
    listening to and I also can if I want to
  • 00:21:53
    if I want to listen to whatever's the
  • 00:21:56
    top 100 I'm going to do that you know
  • 00:21:59
    even in front of other people like I can
  • 00:22:02
    play what I like and I'll take
  • 00:22:04
    suggestions and not just what's your
  • 00:22:06
    favorite song well whatever one's the
  • 00:22:08
    top one right now like you know having
  • 00:22:10
    that to myself is also something really
  • 00:22:12
    nice have you discovered any new artists
  • 00:22:15
    or anyone recently that you're like
  • 00:22:16
    someone that maybe we haven't heard of
  • 00:22:18
    or someone that maybe is less heard of
  • 00:22:20
    that you're like well my favorite artist
  • 00:22:22
    his name is PIM Stones he doesn't make
  • 00:22:25
    music anymore which is really really sad
  • 00:22:27
    but he's my favorite artist ever he's
  • 00:22:29
    made like some of the most incredible
  • 00:22:32
    songs I've ever heard and they're just
  • 00:22:34
    so beautiful to listen to and one of
  • 00:22:37
    them has been my favorite song for a
  • 00:22:39
    while actually someone at my dance
  • 00:22:41
    studio when I was like probably 13 had a
  • 00:22:44
    solo to it wow and ever since then I've
  • 00:22:47
    been obsessed and he only has like two
  • 00:22:51
    songs out on Spotify but I will listen
  • 00:22:54
    to the two of them just on repeat
  • 00:22:56
    forever and ever and ever cuz they're so
  • 00:22:58
    so good wow wow that's amazing yeah I
  • 00:23:01
    love it I'll check it out only two songs
  • 00:23:03
    on Spotify so him Stones all right I'm
  • 00:23:05
    going to go check it out after this
  • 00:23:06
    interview no I love that and I think
  • 00:23:08
    it's really refreshing and it must feel
  • 00:23:11
    so good I can see in your face so you
  • 00:23:13
    just seem so like genuinely happy
  • 00:23:15
    talking about the things that spark joy
  • 00:23:17
    that bring you that sense of comfort and
  • 00:23:19
    ease and make life that much more what
  • 00:23:22
    if someone right now is listening and
  • 00:23:25
    they're like Charlie I'm struggling with
  • 00:23:27
    what what you just said like I find it
  • 00:23:29
    hard to be open and honest about the
  • 00:23:32
    things I like because people make fun of
  • 00:23:34
    me or ridicule me or maybe people tell
  • 00:23:37
    me that's not cool or whatever it is
  • 00:23:39
    like what has slowly given you the
  • 00:23:42
    confidence to get there and what what do
  • 00:23:44
    you think people need to hear to almost
  • 00:23:46
    feel confident in themselves to say that
  • 00:23:49
    I think it just starts with giving
  • 00:23:50
    yourself permission to be open with
  • 00:23:53
    yourself because it really like as much
  • 00:23:57
    as it sucks to hear like it is all in
  • 00:24:00
    your head you have to work on your selft
  • 00:24:02
    talk and I think positive selft talk is
  • 00:24:05
    something that is so often overlooked
  • 00:24:07
    because everyone's so overly critical of
  • 00:24:10
    themselves you see your face you know in
  • 00:24:13
    the reflection of your phone you're in
  • 00:24:15
    pictures background of photos you're
  • 00:24:17
    like oh I hate this one but this one
  • 00:24:19
    posted it and I can't do anything about
  • 00:24:21
    it you know you have to once you start
  • 00:24:24
    speaking in a more positive tone about
  • 00:24:26
    yourself and the people around you the
  • 00:24:28
    easier it is to feel more positive you
  • 00:24:30
    know instead of oh I hate the way I look
  • 00:24:33
    today you know what my hair is doing
  • 00:24:35
    something different and I kind of like
  • 00:24:36
    it you know starting with those little
  • 00:24:38
    little things that sound so so like it's
  • 00:24:43
    so tiny who who even cares you know it's
  • 00:24:45
    in my head it's not affecting anyone but
  • 00:24:48
    it's affecting yourself so I think just
  • 00:24:50
    the more you can be positive and open
  • 00:24:53
    with yourself and not so overly critical
  • 00:24:57
    of yourself if you like a movie and no
  • 00:25:00
    one else likes that movie doesn't mean
  • 00:25:02
    it's a bad movie and you you can't like
  • 00:25:03
    it you can still enjoy watching it and
  • 00:25:07
    okay we just have different opinions
  • 00:25:08
    that's normal and they probably like
  • 00:25:12
    like stuff I don't like but that doesn't
  • 00:25:14
    take away from what they like it's just
  • 00:25:16
    you know the way you talk to yourself is
  • 00:25:18
    so important yeah you're so right and
  • 00:25:20
    it's it's so subtle like those thoughts
  • 00:25:23
    as you just said like I love that switch
  • 00:25:25
    that you just made between I don't like
  • 00:25:27
    how my hair look looks today or oh my
  • 00:25:29
    head's doing something different today
  • 00:25:30
    and that's interesting or it looks cool
  • 00:25:32
    whatever it may be there's an amazing
  • 00:25:35
    book uh for those who who are more
  • 00:25:37
    interested in what Charlie's talking
  • 00:25:38
    about right now it's called psycho
  • 00:25:39
    cybernetics and it's this whole idea of
  • 00:25:42
    how our thoughts completely define our
  • 00:25:45
    reality and how as you just said studies
  • 00:25:49
    showed that we have 60 to 80,000
  • 00:25:51
    thoughts per day and 80% of them are
  • 00:25:54
    negative and repetitive so we're often
  • 00:25:56
    having the same thought which is like I
  • 00:25:58
    don't like how I look or I don't like
  • 00:26:01
    how my hair looks or I don't like this
  • 00:26:03
    about me or whatever it may be and you
  • 00:26:05
    keep having that thought oh yeah and
  • 00:26:07
    then it just Spirals and then that's all
  • 00:26:09
    you feel about yourself and then it
  • 00:26:11
    becomes your reality so that book really
  • 00:26:13
    helped me it's it's an old school
  • 00:26:15
    classic in this space but it convinces
  • 00:26:18
    you that you can change your thoughts
  • 00:26:20
    and it's not like you're lying to
  • 00:26:22
    yourself right like I I want to address
  • 00:26:23
    this for people who think that positive
  • 00:26:26
    this is not about positive thinking this
  • 00:26:27
    is not like looking at yourself and
  • 00:26:28
    going I'm amazing and I'm special like
  • 00:26:31
    that stuff doesn't work either but it's
  • 00:26:32
    almost just tweaking your thoughts
  • 00:26:34
    slightly to being how do you change from
  • 00:26:36
    being critical to just being curious and
  • 00:26:39
    that little switch can change everything
  • 00:26:41
    exactly and it's I think it's so
  • 00:26:42
    important because getting to the point
  • 00:26:45
    where you have a more positive selft
  • 00:26:49
    talk it's it's not linear you know
  • 00:26:52
    you're going to have dips and and bad
  • 00:26:54
    days and good days and bad months and
  • 00:26:56
    good months you just that's that's how
  • 00:26:58
    how it works but I notice when I start
  • 00:27:00
    to see myself slip and realize I've been
  • 00:27:04
    super critical of myself and you know
  • 00:27:06
    what I've had such a bad week that's
  • 00:27:08
    probably why I'm feeling so insecure and
  • 00:27:11
    maybe I'm taking it out on other people
  • 00:27:13
    or I'm I don't want to leave my house
  • 00:27:15
    because I've critiqued everything about
  • 00:27:17
    the way I look and not focus on one
  • 00:27:19
    positive thing at all you know it really
  • 00:27:23
    that's when I noticed when I started to
  • 00:27:25
    dip again how important it is to really
  • 00:27:27
    focus on being kind to yourself yeah and
  • 00:27:31
    I and I I I hope people really hear that
  • 00:27:35
    because I think the reason why we're
  • 00:27:37
    hard on others is because we're so hard
  • 00:27:39
    on ourselves and the reason we're so
  • 00:27:41
    hard on ourselves is because we're so
  • 00:27:42
    hard on others and it's almost like if
  • 00:27:44
    we were just able to be kinder to the
  • 00:27:47
    stranger our friend our family member
  • 00:27:50
    then I think we'd actually be able to be
  • 00:27:52
    more kind to ourselves and vice versa as
  • 00:27:54
    well even like in friendships and
  • 00:27:57
    relationships I think it's important I
  • 00:27:59
    if you're telling jokes back and forth
  • 00:28:02
    to each other and maybe they're like you
  • 00:28:04
    know how you joke with your friends
  • 00:28:06
    like sometimes it can be a little mean
  • 00:28:09
    I've you know I've done the why don't we
  • 00:28:11
    try and just be really really nice to
  • 00:28:13
    each other for a little bit let's really
  • 00:28:15
    focus on bringing each other up and I've
  • 00:28:17
    actually had that conversation before
  • 00:28:18
    and I think it's something that sounds
  • 00:28:22
    almost corny like let's be super nice to
  • 00:28:25
    each other but it really is helpful to
  • 00:28:27
    have the people that you love and maybe
  • 00:28:29
    you say it when you're a little bit down
  • 00:28:30
    so you know you're not asking for
  • 00:28:32
    compliments you're just asking for a
  • 00:28:35
    more positive environment around you and
  • 00:28:37
    I think that there's something so
  • 00:28:39
    special about that and the people around
  • 00:28:41
    you that love you will definitely be
  • 00:28:44
    open to it you know and I think that
  • 00:28:47
    there's also something in that the
  • 00:28:48
    people that you have around you every
  • 00:28:49
    day you need
  • 00:28:51
    to try and build up with you MH yeah and
  • 00:28:55
    that's I get I get that people find that
  • 00:28:57
    hard because I'm also in England we
  • 00:28:59
    banter a lot and so I banter a lot with
  • 00:29:01
    my team with my wife like if if people
  • 00:29:04
    see me and my wife together like they're
  • 00:29:05
    like you guys hate each other because
  • 00:29:07
    we'd go so hard and even my friends I
  • 00:29:09
    just came back from London for my
  • 00:29:10
    sister's wedding and I was there with
  • 00:29:12
    all my boys and I was so we're so
  • 00:29:14
    intense with each other and that's how
  • 00:29:17
    close we are like the more intense we
  • 00:29:18
    can be but you're right that sometimes
  • 00:29:20
    and it's really interesting because when
  • 00:29:21
    you get into a one-on-one with a friend
  • 00:29:23
    they'll say how much they need the
  • 00:29:25
    opposite like when you're with a group
  • 00:29:26
    of people and you're all ban it's but
  • 00:29:28
    when you're oneon-one with you how
  • 00:29:31
    someone's like you know I need a bit of
  • 00:29:33
    encouragement need to know that you
  • 00:29:35
    think I'm doing good at this or whatever
  • 00:29:37
    it may be so and also like don't be
  • 00:29:39
    afraid to be the person that is going to
  • 00:29:42
    text all the people around you every
  • 00:29:44
    time you see them do something I'm so
  • 00:29:45
    proud of you like you looked amazing at
  • 00:29:47
    this or this was so cool that you did
  • 00:29:49
    this like be that person be the annoying
  • 00:29:52
    person you know I wish I did it more and
  • 00:29:55
    I should and that's something that I'll
  • 00:29:57
    take into the the rest of the day um but
  • 00:29:59
    this morning even I I had a conversation
  • 00:30:01
    with my mom and she's got back into
  • 00:30:04
    modeling she's in Louisiana right now so
  • 00:30:06
    I haven't seen her in a couple days and
  • 00:30:08
    she was sending me photos and I didn't
  • 00:30:10
    answer my phone for a little bit just
  • 00:30:12
    because I've been jetlagged and crazy
  • 00:30:14
    and I was like gez like if I sent her
  • 00:30:18
    something I would want to hear back how
  • 00:30:19
    proud she is of me so let me just go
  • 00:30:22
    over the top because sometimes you need
  • 00:30:25
    to be that person especially if that's
  • 00:30:28
    the energy that you're trying to get
  • 00:30:29
    back you can't get that without giving
  • 00:30:30
    it too yeah well said and how's that
  • 00:30:33
    been because obviously that's a big part
  • 00:30:35
    of it right especially with the new new
  • 00:30:37
    docy series as well like the new season
  • 00:30:38
    like this idea of your whole family is
  • 00:30:41
    now in the spotlight and it's almost
  • 00:30:43
    like people just lump everyone together
  • 00:30:46
    especially when it's a a big family and
  • 00:30:47
    everyone's got exciting things happening
  • 00:30:49
    and you know I've obvious obviously
  • 00:30:51
    interviewed your whole family before so
  • 00:30:53
    I've I've sat with them and it's it's
  • 00:30:55
    wonderful and at the same time it's hard
  • 00:30:56
    to find your own space and cve your own
  • 00:30:59
    identity right like that's challenging
  • 00:31:01
    yeah I think that the family Dynamic is
  • 00:31:04
    something that is really really
  • 00:31:07
    confusing especially for me I'm the
  • 00:31:09
    youngest so you spend all your time
  • 00:31:12
    trying to impress your older sister you
  • 00:31:14
    spend all your time trying to prove
  • 00:31:18
    something to your parents even when
  • 00:31:19
    they're already proud of you you know
  • 00:31:22
    it's really confusing you don't know
  • 00:31:24
    where you fit in I'm like I live with
  • 00:31:28
    sister I don't live with my parents but
  • 00:31:30
    you know I still want the same support
  • 00:31:31
    that I got when I lived with them but I
  • 00:31:32
    can't just go up to their room anytime
  • 00:31:35
    I'm having a bad day they don't know
  • 00:31:36
    what's going on with me all the time
  • 00:31:38
    when we're working together and on a
  • 00:31:40
    shoot you know I I hate to say this but
  • 00:31:43
    sometimes they want more stuff of me or
  • 00:31:46
    whatever it is or we want this H for the
  • 00:31:49
    family and then they'll you know expect
  • 00:31:51
    extra for me and it's like well where do
  • 00:31:54
    I fit in because I'm the youngest but
  • 00:31:58
    sometimes they want the most and well
  • 00:32:01
    you know it gets to the point where it's
  • 00:32:03
    like well they they they're not there
  • 00:32:05
    for me and it's like well you know what
  • 00:32:08
    everyone's doing their own stuff like
  • 00:32:10
    everyone has their own stuff going on
  • 00:32:11
    Dixie is music my mom's modeling my
  • 00:32:13
    dad's doing business stuff
  • 00:32:16
    like there's so much going on for all of
  • 00:32:19
    us at the same time it can get hard to
  • 00:32:21
    celebrate every single achievement when
  • 00:32:24
    there's just four of us all doing
  • 00:32:27
    different things all at the same time
  • 00:32:28
    running from place to place traveling
  • 00:32:31
    you know we're still figuring that out
  • 00:32:33
    now I think while filming season 3 our
  • 00:32:36
    entire family was going through a lot
  • 00:32:38
    like mentally and with work so it's hard
  • 00:32:43
    to watch back those episodes
  • 00:32:46
    because we were just all in such a
  • 00:32:48
    different place and so confused at where
  • 00:32:52
    we all stand and taking it out on each
  • 00:32:55
    other which I think is
  • 00:32:58
    probably the biggest regret I have
  • 00:33:01
    through all of this with my family is
  • 00:33:03
    like we need to have each other's backs
  • 00:33:06
    through everything cuz you know through
  • 00:33:10
    it all you work with people you make
  • 00:33:11
    friends
  • 00:33:13
    whatever you have to have family or
  • 00:33:16
    people that you've kind of adopted as
  • 00:33:20
    family that are there to support you
  • 00:33:23
    when there's no cameras or when there's
  • 00:33:25
    no likes or followers anything like you
  • 00:33:27
    need that
  • 00:33:28
    and the hardest time for all of us was
  • 00:33:31
    when we didn't have each other to lean
  • 00:33:32
    on and that is really really shown in
  • 00:33:35
    season three and like even when I see
  • 00:33:38
    Clips I'm like I don't want to see it at
  • 00:33:40
    all like that was such a hard time for
  • 00:33:42
    all of us and it's so embarrassing at
  • 00:33:45
    times to see that like people posting it
  • 00:33:48
    reposting it edits of it edits of times
  • 00:33:51
    where I was like really really really
  • 00:33:53
    struggling and hearing people she's so
  • 00:33:55
    dramatic but you hear a tenth of what
  • 00:33:57
    was actually going on you know so it's
  • 00:34:00
    it's a lot or things are you know maybe
  • 00:34:03
    I was upset about one thing but in the
  • 00:34:06
    show it looks like I'm upset about
  • 00:34:07
    something else it's like a whole bunch
  • 00:34:09
    of stuff that's just I don't even want
  • 00:34:12
    to pay attention to it it must be so
  • 00:34:14
    challenging like I've always I've always
  • 00:34:17
    thought about it like having a show
  • 00:34:19
    where every one of your feelings and
  • 00:34:21
    emotions is being
  • 00:34:23
    documented and then broadcast sounds
  • 00:34:25
    like the most challenging thing ever
  • 00:34:27
    it's a lot yeah it's like even just that
  • 00:34:30
    as a premise and I know it's been around
  • 00:34:31
    forever and you know families have been
  • 00:34:33
    followed forever and there's this format
  • 00:34:36
    has been around forever but I'm like it
  • 00:34:38
    doesn't get easier because of that
  • 00:34:41
    because as humans we love to watch Drama
  • 00:34:43
    We love to watch the gossip we want to
  • 00:34:46
    see the scoop the show has like twists
  • 00:34:49
    and changes and you know characters that
  • 00:34:52
    are upset at each other and you have all
  • 00:34:54
    of this going on but then behind all of
  • 00:34:56
    that there's a real human with real
  • 00:34:58
    emotions trying to figure it all out
  • 00:35:01
    have you been able to separate like
  • 00:35:03
    yourself and then the character on the
  • 00:35:04
    show too like do you feel or do you feel
  • 00:35:06
    that's just so in interrelated that
  • 00:35:08
    you're like in ways yes for sure
  • 00:35:12
    but like people don't realize when
  • 00:35:15
    you're filming sometimes you forget you
  • 00:35:17
    have a mic on and you say something and
  • 00:35:18
    you're like it really wasn't that deep
  • 00:35:20
    like yeah it's not that important
  • 00:35:23
    sometimes you're really really upset or
  • 00:35:27
    you're maybe mentally struggling a
  • 00:35:29
    little bit and you don't have a reason
  • 00:35:32
    cuz sometimes you don't need a reason
  • 00:35:34
    sometimes you just feel really bad and
  • 00:35:36
    that happens so you go through these
  • 00:35:42
    well why are you well what was happening
  • 00:35:44
    you know was it this person's fault and
  • 00:35:45
    it's like I don't know I was just really
  • 00:35:48
    feeling bad and I didn't have a handle
  • 00:35:51
    on it and I had to film so you know it's
  • 00:35:54
    like I don't get a choice of how how
  • 00:35:58
    I how I go into filming you know I can
  • 00:36:02
    try and go in with a positive mindset
  • 00:36:04
    but after a couple hours you know like
  • 00:36:06
    I'm tired and you see how maybe I was
  • 00:36:08
    really feeling that day maybe it's
  • 00:36:10
    nothing that was at all in the show like
  • 00:36:13
    people watching have no idea but it is
  • 00:36:16
    so many real emotions that it's really
  • 00:36:18
    really hard to separate the two but
  • 00:36:23
    hopefully you know if another season
  • 00:36:25
    happens I'll be able to do that and why
  • 00:36:27
    do you feel though in season 3 that it
  • 00:36:29
    got harder with family than easier like
  • 00:36:31
    you'd hope that season 3 like made it
  • 00:36:33
    easier but why do you think it got
  • 00:36:35
    harder is it just that everyone's more
  • 00:36:36
    busy now or yeah I think we were just
  • 00:36:38
    all going through so much individually
  • 00:36:41
    and constantly taking it out on each
  • 00:36:43
    other and you know that's building
  • 00:36:45
    blocks to working with your family no
  • 00:36:48
    family that works together is perfect
  • 00:36:49
    all the time and if you say you are you
  • 00:36:51
    are so wrong especially when you know we
  • 00:36:54
    talk about it all the time like family
  • 00:36:56
    is everything but when you're in those
  • 00:36:58
    moments where you're like I'm pissed at
  • 00:37:01
    this person in my family because of
  • 00:37:03
    maybe it's something stupid but to me
  • 00:37:06
    it's like it feels like a lot it feels
  • 00:37:09
    like the entire world on my shoulders
  • 00:37:12
    for maybe something that isn't that big
  • 00:37:14
    of a deal but it feels like that to me
  • 00:37:16
    you know it's
  • 00:37:17
    just we were all going through so much
  • 00:37:20
    at the same time that there was no way
  • 00:37:24
    that these cameras weren't going to
  • 00:37:25
    catch it it sounds sounds like even even
  • 00:37:28
    though obviously you said that you know
  • 00:37:30
    when you're a kid you still want your
  • 00:37:31
    family to take care of you and obviously
  • 00:37:33
    now you're in a position where obviously
  • 00:37:35
    you take care of yourself you you live
  • 00:37:37
    with your sister but what would you say
  • 00:37:40
    has been the biggest skills you've
  • 00:37:42
    learned in how to take care of yourself
  • 00:37:45
    when you don't have your family to rely
  • 00:37:46
    on I don't even know I feel like that's
  • 00:37:50
    something that is so confusing to me
  • 00:37:54
    still I feel so independent because you
  • 00:37:58
    know I'm traveling without any of my
  • 00:38:01
    friends or family I'm on these big work
  • 00:38:05
    calls like I have no training for this I
  • 00:38:09
    I didn't even finish High School like I
  • 00:38:11
    don't know how to do this I don't know
  • 00:38:13
    if I'm making the right decision I don't
  • 00:38:15
    know if this is you know good or bad I
  • 00:38:18
    still call my dad all the time and I'm
  • 00:38:20
    like okay but seriously what do you
  • 00:38:22
    think about this because I like this
  • 00:38:25
    sounds not that cool to me but
  • 00:38:27
    apparently it's really like I have no
  • 00:38:29
    idea how this works and you know the
  • 00:38:32
    more I do it the more I get comfortable
  • 00:38:35
    and learn but I missed so much of the
  • 00:38:39
    normal growing up going to college and
  • 00:38:42
    then coming back for Thanksgiving or
  • 00:38:44
    Christmas or whatever it is that I kind
  • 00:38:47
    of had to like race to figure it out
  • 00:38:49
    because it was one day you're a kid and
  • 00:38:52
    you're in high school and you have no
  • 00:38:53
    responsibilities and now you have people
  • 00:38:56
    that are working for you and and you're
  • 00:38:59
    responsible for them and you're
  • 00:39:00
    responsible for everything that you do
  • 00:39:02
    and you're not allowed to mess up but
  • 00:39:04
    I'm 16 I don't know how to not mess up I
  • 00:39:06
    don't know anything like how am I
  • 00:39:09
    supposed to learn that without having
  • 00:39:12
    these real life experiences so I think
  • 00:39:13
    the more as time goes on and the more
  • 00:39:16
    I'm put in these situations where I have
  • 00:39:18
    to be independent and a grownup you know
  • 00:39:21
    the easier it gets but it's still
  • 00:39:23
    something that I really have to figure
  • 00:39:25
    out in each indiv ual situation yeah I'm
  • 00:39:29
    36 and I still don't know how not to
  • 00:39:31
    mess up like it's just because I think
  • 00:39:33
    what we don't realize is you've got
  • 00:39:35
    yourself and your identity like you as
  • 00:39:37
    an individual which is always changing
  • 00:39:39
    so whether you're 36 or whether you're
  • 00:39:41
    19 you're still dealing with that on top
  • 00:39:44
    of that you've now got the industry is
  • 00:39:45
    always changing so like the platforms
  • 00:39:47
    are changing and the business is
  • 00:39:49
    changing and the social whatever all of
  • 00:39:50
    that's always changing so you've never
  • 00:39:52
    done it before and most people have
  • 00:39:54
    never done it before so no matter how
  • 00:39:56
    smart someone was 5 months ago
  • 00:39:59
    Everything's changed and so everything's
  • 00:40:00
    being updated and then on top of all of
  • 00:40:03
    that you've got everyone around you
  • 00:40:05
    who's constantly changing and growing
  • 00:40:06
    and evolving and so it's so hard to ever
  • 00:40:09
    feel you ever have a handle on on all
  • 00:40:12
    areas of your life yeah and so
  • 00:40:14
    definitely as a 16-year-old now a
  • 00:40:16
    19-year-old like it's it's so much to
  • 00:40:19
    learn quickly and I think you had your
  • 00:40:21
    you recently had your prom or you did
  • 00:40:22
    your prom here right like you yeah I had
  • 00:40:25
    I had two we did one on the show
  • 00:40:28
    and then I went to my high school prom
  • 00:40:30
    back in my hometown yeah which was
  • 00:40:32
    really fun and like the bit of senior
  • 00:40:35
    year that I got to have which was really
  • 00:40:38
    nice because I didn't get that at all
  • 00:40:41
    and a lot of kids didn't during Co and
  • 00:40:44
    everything so I'm definitely not the
  • 00:40:46
    only person feeling like this a lot of
  • 00:40:48
    freshman sophomore year at College like
  • 00:40:51
    people didn't get that people didn't get
  • 00:40:53
    that very very intrical part of growing
  • 00:40:56
    up or whether it's your first job like
  • 00:40:58
    this was my first job I had never had
  • 00:41:02
    any true responsibility before and I
  • 00:41:05
    don't know how and there's no rule book
  • 00:41:07
    to say well this is how you be an adult
  • 00:41:09
    so it's kind of
  • 00:41:11
    just figuring it out and messing up
  • 00:41:14
    along the way but when you mess up and
  • 00:41:16
    you have so many people telling you how
  • 00:41:19
    you messed up and how that's horrible
  • 00:41:20
    and you're are doing all of these things
  • 00:41:23
    wrong you're like yeah I know but this
  • 00:41:25
    is all I know how to do kind of
  • 00:41:28
    just every day learn a little bit and
  • 00:41:32
    just continue to do your best cuz that's
  • 00:41:34
    all you can do yeah yeah and do you know
  • 00:41:36
    what it's interesting because we're
  • 00:41:38
    hearing that from you and I think
  • 00:41:39
    everyone who's listening right now is
  • 00:41:40
    going that's me too like you know I
  • 00:41:42
    think it doesn't matter how old you are
  • 00:41:44
    or how wise you are or how smart or
  • 00:41:48
    whether you have your own business or
  • 00:41:49
    you don't or whe we're just all feeling
  • 00:41:52
    that way because everyone is just trying
  • 00:41:56
    to do their best and sometimes their
  • 00:41:58
    best is not good enough for everyone
  • 00:41:59
    else but that's all they could give and
  • 00:42:02
    I feel that for anyone and everyone
  • 00:42:05
    today and so I think what you're saying
  • 00:42:07
    resonates or feels very relatable at
  • 00:42:09
    least even to me and I'm sure everyone
  • 00:42:11
    who's listening is thinking that as well
  • 00:42:12
    like I'm just trying yeah and that's
  • 00:42:15
    like the normal human experience and I
  • 00:42:18
    definitely get on myself about it
  • 00:42:21
    but everyone's just doing their best
  • 00:42:24
    like my parents are still figuring out
  • 00:42:25
    who they are you know it's ever changing
  • 00:42:29
    like my grandmother before she passed
  • 00:42:33
    started to get a a handle on all of the
  • 00:42:36
    Social Media stuff and like had to watch
  • 00:42:38
    me she would watch YouTube videos or
  • 00:42:40
    like see see things online articles and
  • 00:42:43
    she would be like I heard you did this
  • 00:42:45
    and I'm like well that's not true that's
  • 00:42:46
    just like an article you know and she's
  • 00:42:48
    like no no no but I saw it in the press
  • 00:42:50
    and I was like yeah I know but it's not
  • 00:42:52
    it's not true so we like had to get a
  • 00:42:55
    handle on that but she was changing and
  • 00:42:57
    she was evolving with the times and she
  • 00:42:59
    didn't know how it worked and she was
  • 00:43:01
    you know she was she was a lot older and
  • 00:43:04
    and still figuring out who she is and
  • 00:43:07
    well how do I do this and and I want to
  • 00:43:09
    watch you but I have to discover this
  • 00:43:11
    whole new thing like everyone is
  • 00:43:13
    learning something and she was just
  • 00:43:16
    doing her best to watch her
  • 00:43:18
    grandchildren on social media like it's
  • 00:43:20
    something that is so cute and something
  • 00:43:22
    that seems so simple to me like we'll
  • 00:43:25
    just download Tik Tok and watch my
  • 00:43:26
    videos
  • 00:43:29
    but learn once you realize that
  • 00:43:32
    literally every is just try to do their
  • 00:43:35
    best to get to the next day like you can
  • 00:43:39
    be a lot easier on yourself but also a
  • 00:43:40
    lot easier on everyone around you mhh
  • 00:43:43
    and also even just what you said about
  • 00:43:45
    your grandmother like learning about how
  • 00:43:49
    she's reading something that sounds so
  • 00:43:51
    true and you're like no it didn't happen
  • 00:43:53
    that way and it's funny cuz I go through
  • 00:43:56
    similar things with me my family so my
  • 00:43:58
    parents will read an article about me or
  • 00:44:00
    whatever and they'll get really upset
  • 00:44:01
    for me or they'll get offended for me
  • 00:44:04
    because there's something in it that
  • 00:44:05
    they don't like or whatever it is or
  • 00:44:07
    there's something said about the family
  • 00:44:08
    which you must have to deal with way
  • 00:44:10
    more than I do because your family's in
  • 00:44:12
    the spotlight too but then they're like
  • 00:44:14
    oh well why did they say that about the
  • 00:44:15
    family and this and that and I'm like I
  • 00:44:17
    didn't say anything like you know it's
  • 00:44:19
    almost like I didn't even talk about
  • 00:44:21
    that I didn't mention anything it's just
  • 00:44:22
    someone coming up with something yeah
  • 00:44:25
    and I can't imagine for you like it's
  • 00:44:27
    like the clickbait Articles I'm like I'm
  • 00:44:30
    telling you that this isn't real or
  • 00:44:32
    she'd like see someone online she's like
  • 00:44:35
    I don't like them and why they said
  • 00:44:38
    something about you three years ago well
  • 00:44:39
    they're my friends now she's like I
  • 00:44:41
    don't know I don't like them like all
  • 00:44:44
    right you're going to think whatever you
  • 00:44:46
    think like that's fine she was so cute
  • 00:44:48
    and so so supportive like she spent all
  • 00:44:51
    day on her iPad just watching YouTube
  • 00:44:53
    compilations of my Tik toks and every
  • 00:44:55
    time I see her she'd be like need stop
  • 00:44:57
    cursing on the internet and I was like I
  • 00:44:58
    know I
  • 00:45:01
    know that's so sweet that's so funny
  • 00:45:04
    yeah I mean and and you nice of you not
  • 00:45:06
    to block her from those videos either oh
  • 00:45:08
    yeah even I know so many people that do
  • 00:45:09
    that my other grandma she like still
  • 00:45:11
    swipes up on all my story she's like you
  • 00:45:13
    look great or she'd like reply to fan
  • 00:45:15
    pages like a lot of people's
  • 00:45:17
    grandparents I hear this all the time
  • 00:45:19
    from all the social media kids it's like
  • 00:45:21
    my grandma responds to my fan pages
  • 00:45:23
    thinking they're me and I'm like but
  • 00:45:26
    it's so it's so sweet and I love it and
  • 00:45:30
    I mean my grandma that's my grandma my
  • 00:45:33
    dad's side like she like she still texts
  • 00:45:36
    me all the time like you look so good in
  • 00:45:39
    this or this is so cool or anytime I do
  • 00:45:42
    anything where it's like something that
  • 00:45:44
    she would like I'll like send her a
  • 00:45:46
    photo and you know she's just proud you
  • 00:45:49
    know that's also a good person to talk
  • 00:45:51
    to that's just like always going to be
  • 00:45:53
    proud of me is really nice to have yeah
  • 00:45:56
    definitely to allow that in do you find
  • 00:45:58
    that you found like I know you're close
  • 00:46:01
    with marel who I love too he's such a I
  • 00:46:04
    I love marquel's energy I've only met
  • 00:46:06
    him a couple of times but he's so
  • 00:46:07
    awesome have you found that you've got a
  • 00:46:10
    good group of friends around you in the
  • 00:46:13
    industry because what I found is that so
  • 00:46:16
    I have a bunch of great friends back in
  • 00:46:17
    London who are like my best friends like
  • 00:46:19
    my best man at my wedding and like my
  • 00:46:21
    closest friends that I grew up with and
  • 00:46:23
    I speak to them like I speak to my best
  • 00:46:25
    friend like three times a week still
  • 00:46:26
    because it's so important to me and I
  • 00:46:29
    need it and at the same time I also need
  • 00:46:31
    friends who are in the industry because
  • 00:46:33
    there are certain things that we can all
  • 00:46:35
    understand about the industry kind of
  • 00:46:37
    like the idea of yeah don't trust the
  • 00:46:39
    Press on that and whatever because they
  • 00:46:40
    already know that because they go
  • 00:46:41
    through the same stuff do you find I it
  • 00:46:44
    sounds like you have a great group of
  • 00:46:45
    friends back at home do you find that
  • 00:46:47
    you've also found good friends in the
  • 00:46:49
    industry that you can kind of compare
  • 00:46:51
    notes with a bit too and be like oh I
  • 00:46:53
    just went through that this is how I'm
  • 00:46:55
    feeling yeah definitely I mean marquel's
  • 00:46:57
    like he's family to me he has
  • 00:47:03
    shown so much to me just as a person
  • 00:47:07
    whether it's talking to me oneon-one or
  • 00:47:10
    defending me online or you know
  • 00:47:13
    defending me to the people around him
  • 00:47:15
    like he is someone that every person
  • 00:47:18
    that meets him has so much amazing
  • 00:47:20
    things to say about him and I'm so
  • 00:47:22
    thankful that I have him in my life
  • 00:47:24
    whether it's like we're doing nothing or
  • 00:47:27
    we're out with a bunch of people and I
  • 00:47:29
    we want to have a dance party in the
  • 00:47:30
    middle of the dance floor and it's just
  • 00:47:31
    us to like we'll do it or in the middle
  • 00:47:34
    of a restaurant whatever it is like I
  • 00:47:35
    love that but I've definitely found a
  • 00:47:38
    lot of people that are in the industry
  • 00:47:41
    and a lot of the friendships that I have
  • 00:47:43
    I tend to keep quiet about and a lot of
  • 00:47:46
    the friendships that I have I've met
  • 00:47:48
    them in very very weird ways because how
  • 00:47:52
    am I supposed to meet people you know I
  • 00:47:54
    don't go out super often I don't
  • 00:47:57
    I am not usually around people my own
  • 00:47:59
    age like a lot of my friends that I met
  • 00:48:02
    they were actually dancers at the Kids
  • 00:48:06
    Choice Awards and we just clicked and I
  • 00:48:10
    started to hang out with them and I
  • 00:48:12
    really liked them and they're really
  • 00:48:13
    cool people and they're in an industry
  • 00:48:16
    that I'm so fascinated by and yeah they
  • 00:48:20
    do so much similar things to me but it's
  • 00:48:22
    also different and I think that that's
  • 00:48:24
    really special and after meeting it
  • 00:48:27
    was really refreshing to be around
  • 00:48:30
    people my own age and also just have
  • 00:48:35
    people that are hardworking and
  • 00:48:38
    determined and not competitive with me
  • 00:48:40
    at all and just happy to see me happy
  • 00:48:43
    and I can have fun with whether we're
  • 00:48:44
    filming or not you know but even like my
  • 00:48:47
    boyfriend he's in the industry and you
  • 00:48:50
    know we we tend to handle things a
  • 00:48:51
    little bit differently but sometimes I I
  • 00:48:54
    have to be like it's not worth it you
  • 00:48:56
    know we don't have to respond we don't
  • 00:48:57
    have to do anything like it's not worth
  • 00:48:59
    it I know you you know me whether people
  • 00:49:03
    are saying things about me or people are
  • 00:49:04
    saying things about our relationship you
  • 00:49:06
    know having each other to kind of
  • 00:49:10
    navigate
  • 00:49:11
    that on our own is is really nice
  • 00:49:14
    because it's
  • 00:49:15
    also what two 19-year-olds in a
  • 00:49:18
    relationship have their lives together
  • 00:49:21
    you know there's ups and downs like
  • 00:49:25
    whether I'm working all the time time or
  • 00:49:27
    he's working all the time or I'm
  • 00:49:28
    traveling or whatever it is like there's
  • 00:49:31
    always so much going on that can so
  • 00:49:33
    easily put a strain on a relationship
  • 00:49:35
    and also just coming into adulthood with
  • 00:49:39
    two teenagers that have no idea what
  • 00:49:41
    they're doing and just trying their best
  • 00:49:43
    like you know it's been really confusing
  • 00:49:47
    to navigate but also really refreshing
  • 00:49:49
    to have someone else there that's
  • 00:49:52
    like just trying to figure it out day by
  • 00:49:55
    day mhm it's almost yeah it's almost
  • 00:49:57
    easier in one sense because you have
  • 00:49:59
    someone to bounce it off of as opposed
  • 00:50:01
    to you're like am I crazy are you crazy
  • 00:50:03
    is this like is this okay you know so
  • 00:50:07
    it's it's really nice do you do you
  • 00:50:09
    think the hardest part about success and
  • 00:50:11
    fame is having a relationship in the
  • 00:50:14
    public eye would you say that that's the
  • 00:50:16
    hardest part in terms of when it comes
  • 00:50:18
    to your relationships or that's not
  • 00:50:20
    sometimes I feel
  • 00:50:22
    like you know when two people that are
  • 00:50:25
    in a relationship have like
  • 00:50:27
    an off week or whatever there can be the
  • 00:50:32
    whole this person didn't like their
  • 00:50:33
    photo or they haven't posted together
  • 00:50:35
    they're broken up or this person's
  • 00:50:37
    starting a rumor like even if you you
  • 00:50:40
    two are struggling that's for you to go
  • 00:50:42
    through and handle it however is
  • 00:50:44
    appropriate whether you guys part ways
  • 00:50:46
    or continue to work through things
  • 00:50:47
    together like no relationship is perfect
  • 00:50:50
    ever you have moments where so much is
  • 00:50:54
    going on like during dancing with the
  • 00:50:56
    star
  • 00:50:57
    I was dancing s days a week I was never
  • 00:51:00
    home he was like I felt like I didn't
  • 00:51:03
    have a girlfriend and that was really
  • 00:51:06
    hard it was hard on my parents you know
  • 00:51:08
    like it's a lot and especially for two
  • 00:51:11
    young teenagers to go through like we
  • 00:51:14
    don't we don't know how to do this no
  • 00:51:16
    one knows how to do this so we're just
  • 00:51:18
    doing our best and there's ups and downs
  • 00:51:21
    but we work through it and that's just
  • 00:51:24
    being a person you know yeah yeah yeah
  • 00:51:27
    no absolutely and and and just the idea
  • 00:51:31
    of it is interesting when you've got two
  • 00:51:33
    people who have crazy lives and and have
  • 00:51:35
    different Journeys and have different
  • 00:51:37
    you know commitments and family
  • 00:51:39
    commitments and there's just so much
  • 00:51:40
    going on to keep up with it all what
  • 00:51:42
    have you found what has helped you both
  • 00:51:45
    kind of keep up with each other's
  • 00:51:47
    schedules in each other's lives because
  • 00:51:48
    that's not going to change at least not
  • 00:51:51
    right now and so how what what has
  • 00:51:53
    helped what has worked I think you know
  • 00:51:56
    we've obviously talked about this so
  • 00:51:58
    much just as a whole I was I was just
  • 00:52:02
    gone for almost two weeks and we were on
  • 00:52:05
    different time zones just trying to text
  • 00:52:08
    and update each other but it it's
  • 00:52:10
    figuring out what each other needs you
  • 00:52:13
    know if he wants me to keep him updated
  • 00:52:16
    then I'll keep him updated because
  • 00:52:17
    that's what he needs if he if I need him
  • 00:52:21
    to tell me what's going on in his week
  • 00:52:24
    so I don't feel left out like that's
  • 00:52:26
    totally cool that's what I need it's
  • 00:52:27
    just having that conversation and
  • 00:52:29
    realizing that people's needs change and
  • 00:52:32
    adapting with that and not feeling like
  • 00:52:35
    well I don't want to make him upset like
  • 00:52:37
    he's working a lot and I know he's super
  • 00:52:39
    busy like I need a shoulder to lean on
  • 00:52:41
    it's also having the conversation like
  • 00:52:43
    sometimes I'll literally say I'm really
  • 00:52:46
    really sensitive right now like I just
  • 00:52:47
    need some extra support and then he
  • 00:52:50
    knows to well she needs this right now
  • 00:52:52
    okay like that's totally cool that's two
  • 00:52:55
    people in a Rel relationship doing
  • 00:52:57
    whatever they can to make the other
  • 00:52:58
    person happy just normal human things
  • 00:53:02
    and definitely not worrying about what
  • 00:53:05
    anyone online has to say it's so not
  • 00:53:08
    worth it it really isn't cuz 99% of
  • 00:53:11
    these people are looking for you to
  • 00:53:13
    respond like even today I woke up to
  • 00:53:17
    some crazy person talking about me and
  • 00:53:19
    like the most wildly disrespectful ways
  • 00:53:23
    like I've really seen in a long time the
  • 00:53:26
    thing is like me and this person were at
  • 00:53:29
    an event together and this person
  • 00:53:30
    introduced themselves I introduced we
  • 00:53:32
    tried to be nice this kid was not nice
  • 00:53:34
    to me and then went and talked very
  • 00:53:36
    poorly on me and Landon's like well let
  • 00:53:39
    me call this kid and I'm like it's not
  • 00:53:41
    that big of a deal like it's not that's
  • 00:53:42
    what he's looking for is it taking
  • 00:53:45
    everything in me not to respond or not
  • 00:53:47
    to text him yeah but I know if I text
  • 00:53:50
    him he's going to post it and that's
  • 00:53:51
    going to be a thing and he's going to
  • 00:53:53
    get exactly what he wants me to respond
  • 00:53:56
    and give to whatever story he wants to
  • 00:53:59
    portray to the people that watch him
  • 00:54:01
    it's not it's not my problem like I know
  • 00:54:05
    who I am and that's good enough for me
  • 00:54:08
    like it doesn't matter yeah and it's so
  • 00:54:11
    hard to get to that point but it's so
  • 00:54:13
    liberating when you do like it's so
  • 00:54:15
    freeing when you realize that where
  • 00:54:17
    you're like actually not responding is
  • 00:54:19
    not getting caught up in someone else's
  • 00:54:21
    thing yeah and like then it just gives
  • 00:54:24
    people an opportunity to well if I say
  • 00:54:27
    this about her then she's going to
  • 00:54:28
    respond and it's like I don't have time
  • 00:54:31
    to respond to every little thing that
  • 00:54:32
    people have to say about me and it it
  • 00:54:35
    takes so
  • 00:54:37
    much it's so draining to to have to see
  • 00:54:41
    that and the more you talk about it the
  • 00:54:43
    more your fans talk about it and people
  • 00:54:46
    in the Press talk about it and it's like
  • 00:54:48
    for what reason because I was angry at
  • 00:54:51
    this kid who I met once like who cares
  • 00:54:55
    yeah and and it's hard when the person
  • 00:54:58
    you're in a relationship with wants to
  • 00:54:59
    defend you too and like and he's so
  • 00:55:01
    sweet he is so quick to defend me in
  • 00:55:06
    every way possible and I just have to be
  • 00:55:07
    like it's cool like it's good I feel
  • 00:55:10
    like I tell him that all the time cuz he
  • 00:55:12
    gets so upset whenever people have
  • 00:55:15
    something negative to say about me or
  • 00:55:17
    his family and I mean I
  • 00:55:20
    think I definitely told him like many
  • 00:55:23
    many times it's cool like it's it's
  • 00:55:25
    totally fine they're going to say it no
  • 00:55:28
    matter what and even if you respond and
  • 00:55:29
    are like well this isn't true because
  • 00:55:31
    this is this they're not they're they
  • 00:55:33
    already read it and they think what they
  • 00:55:34
    think about you they're not going to
  • 00:55:36
    change their minds you know yeah you're
  • 00:55:38
    arguing with people that don't care what
  • 00:55:40
    you have to say mhm yeah it's already
  • 00:55:42
    lost like yeah it's it's a lose lose
  • 00:55:44
    situation so moving on is the best thing
  • 00:55:47
    you can do yeah no and and it's
  • 00:55:48
    wonderful to be with someone and have
  • 00:55:50
    that with someone who you know cares
  • 00:55:52
    about you that deeply and my wife's like
  • 00:55:54
    that like my wife gets very defensive
  • 00:55:56
    about me and like can get really
  • 00:55:58
    activated and she gets really upset for
  • 00:56:00
    me and whatever it may be and I I really
  • 00:56:02
    always appreciate that because I can see
  • 00:56:05
    that she knows who I am and that's kind
  • 00:56:06
    of what it goes back to where I always
  • 00:56:07
    say the same thing to her I'm like I'm
  • 00:56:09
    just glad I have someone who knows who I
  • 00:56:10
    am especially like when someone cares
  • 00:56:13
    about you like that to see you upset
  • 00:56:15
    because of something and not being able
  • 00:56:17
    to fix the problem CU they just want to
  • 00:56:20
    see you happy like I understand
  • 00:56:24
    how upset that might make you you know
  • 00:56:27
    and I I feel bad cuz sometimes I feel
  • 00:56:29
    like I drag him into the drama just
  • 00:56:31
    because of the relationship but I think
  • 00:56:34
    knowing that you know we have each other
  • 00:56:39
    and I can tell him like this was this
  • 00:56:42
    actually really hurt my feelings today
  • 00:56:43
    and and it was it was a lot and I just
  • 00:56:46
    need some comfort and I need you to be
  • 00:56:49
    by my side and that's good enough for me
  • 00:56:52
    you know yeah definitely definitely
  • 00:56:53
    Charlie what are you excited about right
  • 00:56:55
    now like what's kind of like you know
  • 00:56:56
    you've done so many amazing things and I
  • 00:56:58
    feel like this journey that you're
  • 00:56:59
    saying with your identity of like
  • 00:57:01
    getting to know yourself better yeah
  • 00:57:04
    you've done so many things and I'm
  • 00:57:05
    guessing some of them you're like oh
  • 00:57:06
    yeah that was Charlie demilio and then
  • 00:57:08
    this is Charlie it's like what is
  • 00:57:09
    Charlie like really excited about or
  • 00:57:12
    curious about or passionate about or
  • 00:57:13
    like what's coming up or you're like I
  • 00:57:15
    really want to try that out or learn
  • 00:57:17
    that or whatever whatever it may be like
  • 00:57:19
    open floor
  • 00:57:20
    um okay I think first thing that I'm
  • 00:57:24
    most excited about is my dogs I have a
  • 00:57:26
    puppy um I know I sound so lame I have
  • 00:57:30
    I'm not laughing because I think it's
  • 00:57:31
    lame I'm laughing cuz it's cute it's
  • 00:57:33
    just like yeah you going to have to open
  • 00:57:34
    up a dog shelter or something I know I'm
  • 00:57:36
    like in love with her uh I have my like
  • 00:57:39
    older dog who's nine she's literally me
  • 00:57:41
    as a dog and I'm I'm obsessed with her
  • 00:57:44
    she's most adorable dog ever she's
  • 00:57:46
    literal human but then I have this puppy
  • 00:57:48
    that L and I adopted
  • 00:57:51
    from
  • 00:57:52
    Nashville and she's like she was
  • 00:57:56
    abandoned and she was like it was a
  • 00:57:59
    horrible story and it really like pulled
  • 00:58:00
    at my heartstrings and I was like okay I
  • 00:58:02
    need to take you home now like I will
  • 00:58:04
    take care of you I love you and like
  • 00:58:07
    watching her grow up and being
  • 00:58:09
    responsible for her I think has been
  • 00:58:11
    very refreshing to me because my older
  • 00:58:13
    dog she's you know she's very
  • 00:58:16
    self-sufficient she's also very lazy so
  • 00:58:19
    I'll be up in the morning and she'll
  • 00:58:21
    wake up 2 hours later ready to be fed
  • 00:58:23
    like she is not she has her own schedule
  • 00:58:26
    and I love that about her because that's
  • 00:58:28
    how I raise her she's a very like
  • 00:58:30
    laidback dog can have all the lights on
  • 00:58:33
    and she's sleeping like I love that but
  • 00:58:35
    this puppy you know you have to train
  • 00:58:36
    her you have to it's very specific and
  • 00:58:38
    these formative puppy years are so
  • 00:58:40
    important to who this dog becomes
  • 00:58:42
    there's no bad dogs there's only bad dog
  • 00:58:45
    owners so I just like am loving this
  • 00:58:48
    journey of truly cuz you know I got my
  • 00:58:50
    dog N9 years ago I was 10 I wasn't
  • 00:58:54
    actually raising her and now getting the
  • 00:58:56
    chance to raise a dog and it's really
  • 00:58:59
    really exciting and special and seeing
  • 00:59:01
    the two of them together is like my
  • 00:59:03
    favorite thing ever I think something
  • 00:59:04
    else that I'm excited for is I have a
  • 00:59:08
    dance room in my garage so I love just
  • 00:59:11
    going down there any time of the day
  • 00:59:14
    whether it's 4: in the morning or 1:
  • 00:59:16
    p.m. and just like letting go and being
  • 00:59:19
    open with myself and using movement as
  • 00:59:22
    therapy and also getting a little bit of
  • 00:59:24
    a workout in you know like being
  • 00:59:26
    productive I love that
  • 00:59:28
    and
  • 00:59:31
    probably experimenting more with my
  • 00:59:33
    style that's something that I've just
  • 00:59:36
    recently started to get into I think
  • 00:59:39
    Landon and my sister had a lot to do
  • 00:59:41
    with that because I I love the way that
  • 00:59:43
    they put together outfits I think that
  • 00:59:45
    they both have really good Styles and it
  • 00:59:46
    comes very natural to them and to me
  • 00:59:49
    it's a lot harder because I always go
  • 00:59:51
    for what I know instead of stepping out
  • 00:59:53
    of the box but I'm trying so that's
  • 00:59:57
    something exciting and it's fun to
  • 00:59:59
    experiment you know yeah I love how FAL
  • 01:00:02
    all those were those were great they
  • 01:00:03
    were great choices thank you yeah I love
  • 01:00:05
    how none of them were career career
  • 01:00:07
    related and like none of them were work
  • 01:00:09
    related and that's awesome because I can
  • 01:00:11
    tell that you've you've really started
  • 01:00:13
    carving those two things as separate
  • 01:00:15
    yeah um workwise you know using my voice
  • 01:00:18
    more online I think that you know even
  • 01:00:21
    doing a podcast is something very
  • 01:00:24
    outside of my comfort zone a lot of my
  • 01:00:26
    career has been not talking so it's been
  • 01:00:30
    very hard for me to get into using my
  • 01:00:32
    voice and figuring out what do I want to
  • 01:00:34
    say especially when you don't know
  • 01:00:36
    yourself how do you answer questions I
  • 01:00:38
    don't you can't just say I don't know
  • 01:00:40
    for everything so that's something
  • 01:00:42
    that's been special and I've been trying
  • 01:00:43
    to make more content for my fans and
  • 01:00:48
    trying to use my voice more and like
  • 01:00:50
    even little things finishing a get ready
  • 01:00:52
    with me which I film 50 of them and I
  • 01:00:56
    post one of them like trying to get more
  • 01:00:57
    into it and go back to the reason why I
  • 01:01:00
    started social media because I like it
  • 01:01:02
    and I'm finally at a point where I like
  • 01:01:04
    it again which is really refreshing and
  • 01:01:06
    nice it doesn't feel like
  • 01:01:08
    work I love that and what what's been
  • 01:01:11
    what is that when you say you want to
  • 01:01:13
    use your voice and even doing the
  • 01:01:14
    podcast today like you coming on today
  • 01:01:16
    and you know being open and and trusting
  • 01:01:19
    me and trusting this space and just
  • 01:01:21
    being vulnerable with the idea of like
  • 01:01:23
    you said I don't know I'm trying to
  • 01:01:24
    figure out who I am yeah and and being
  • 01:01:27
    okay with that which I think by the way
  • 01:01:28
    for a 19y old is is completely normal
  • 01:01:31
    and wonderful and good and like I think
  • 01:01:33
    that's amazing that you want to
  • 01:01:35
    spend this time in your life figuring
  • 01:01:37
    out who you are I think it's the best
  • 01:01:39
    investment you could ever make I'm so
  • 01:01:41
    happy that you're doing it and I'm
  • 01:01:42
    hoping that you take your whole audience
  • 01:01:45
    and community on a journey to do it for
  • 01:01:47
    themselves because you're going to save
  • 01:01:48
    so many people from so many stressful 20
  • 01:01:52
    to 30 year old Journeys right like
  • 01:01:54
    literally like you can either do it now
  • 01:01:56
    or you can do it when you're 30 and if
  • 01:01:58
    you do it now it's like you're going to
  • 01:01:59
    help so many people what is is that kind
  • 01:02:03
    of like when you say using your voice is
  • 01:02:04
    that the type of Journey you want people
  • 01:02:06
    to go on with you or are you are you
  • 01:02:08
    still figuring out what that Journey it
  • 01:02:10
    is that you want people to go on with
  • 01:02:11
    you yeah as of right now it's literally
  • 01:02:15
    just talking talking online just
  • 01:02:18
    actually using my voice you know for so
  • 01:02:22
    long it was a song and no words like it
  • 01:02:26
    sounds so little but just talking I feel
  • 01:02:30
    like that's something that is which is
  • 01:02:32
    so weird but it's so out outside of my
  • 01:02:34
    comfort zone and I feel
  • 01:02:38
    so like weird doing it but has honestly
  • 01:02:42
    been really refreshing for me because
  • 01:02:46
    you know I'm growing up and a part of
  • 01:02:50
    growing up is being confident with what
  • 01:02:52
    you have to say and using your words and
  • 01:02:55
    just
  • 01:02:56
    talking with you know a little bit of
  • 01:02:59
    purpose and I'm growing up but also so
  • 01:03:02
    are all of the people that are watching
  • 01:03:04
    me and I think bringing them on that
  • 01:03:06
    journey of this is literally just what
  • 01:03:09
    I'm doing I'm not talking about anything
  • 01:03:13
    that's really of any importance
  • 01:03:15
    sometimes sometimes I'm just talking but
  • 01:03:18
    that's what I need to do to move to this
  • 01:03:20
    next step of my life to hopefully talk
  • 01:03:22
    about something important and talk about
  • 01:03:24
    what matters to me I think that that's
  • 01:03:26
    this is a very intrical step of growing
  • 01:03:30
    up I think that's really smart I
  • 01:03:31
    genuinely do I think that takes a lot of
  • 01:03:33
    courage to even say that I don't think
  • 01:03:35
    it's I don't think it's like
  • 01:03:37
    insignificant at all I think it it makes
  • 01:03:39
    a lot of sense to me that in order for
  • 01:03:42
    you to stand for something you need to
  • 01:03:44
    get to a point where you just feel
  • 01:03:45
    comfortable being open and sharing yeah
  • 01:03:48
    and so much of the beginning few years
  • 01:03:51
    of this journey every time I
  • 01:03:54
    talked someone had something to say and
  • 01:03:58
    you know you get cancelled every 5
  • 01:04:00
    Seconds like that was what was happening
  • 01:04:03
    to me for so long anytime I opened my
  • 01:04:05
    mouth so I just stopped talking I
  • 01:04:07
    stopped saying anything that was
  • 01:04:08
    important to me I stopped doing anything
  • 01:04:11
    that was outside of the box that I was
  • 01:04:14
    put in where I couldn't go wrong if I
  • 01:04:16
    just didn't do anything you know and I
  • 01:04:19
    have opinions I have thoughts I have
  • 01:04:21
    things I like I have things I don't like
  • 01:04:24
    why can't I just say it like like who is
  • 01:04:26
    stopping me the people that actually
  • 01:04:28
    care what I have to say they're going to
  • 01:04:31
    support me even if they disagree you
  • 01:04:33
    know whether it's I really like this
  • 01:04:36
    outfit and they don't like that's cool
  • 01:04:38
    they respect my opinion I respect theirs
  • 01:04:40
    that's awesome the people that don't
  • 01:04:42
    like me they're not going to like me no
  • 01:04:44
    matter what they didn't like me when I
  • 01:04:45
    wasn't saying anything they're not going
  • 01:04:47
    to like me now that's fine I'm I'm not
  • 01:04:50
    making my videos for them mhm yeah
  • 01:04:53
    definitely when when you say you still
  • 01:04:55
    want to get to know who you are and your
  • 01:04:57
    identity what are the parts that you're
  • 01:04:58
    like I'm still just trying to figure
  • 01:05:00
    this out or this part I'm like really
  • 01:05:01
    curious about I'm trying to learn about
  • 01:05:03
    this about myself but I don't know what
  • 01:05:04
    like what are those parts of yourself
  • 01:05:06
    yeah I think a lot of it has to do with
  • 01:05:09
    the way that I present myself whether
  • 01:05:13
    it's how do I like my makeup done how do
  • 01:05:17
    I like to dress how do I like to look
  • 01:05:20
    how do I like to show myself to other
  • 01:05:22
    people not just what is
  • 01:05:27
    going on at the moment how do I like to
  • 01:05:30
    smell you know I like born dreamer I
  • 01:05:32
    know I like that and let's discover for
  • 01:05:35
    future with born dreamer what else do I
  • 01:05:36
    like you know whatever I know I like go
  • 01:05:39
    a little bit deeper and you know
  • 01:05:42
    something's so simple I've been doing
  • 01:05:43
    more colors with my nails which is so
  • 01:05:46
    random and so small it's your nails you
  • 01:05:50
    know people get their nails done all the
  • 01:05:51
    time but I did bright green and I
  • 01:05:53
    thought about that for 3 weeks before
  • 01:05:55
    before I did it and like why I enjoyed
  • 01:05:59
    it I liked the color I wanted it on my
  • 01:06:00
    nails it made me happy every time I saw
  • 01:06:02
    them I was like I did that that was
  • 01:06:04
    something different I normally do nude
  • 01:06:07
    let's do something fun like that little
  • 01:06:10
    thing was so much fun for me and it
  • 01:06:12
    brought me so much happiness and I would
  • 01:06:15
    match this color to this and it's just
  • 01:06:17
    so fun why am I robbing myself of fun
  • 01:06:20
    because I don't want to put myself out
  • 01:06:22
    there yeah good for you I honestly like
  • 01:06:25
    you're literally doing all the Practical
  • 01:06:27
    steps that it takes to build your values
  • 01:06:29
    like and that's what it is all of these
  • 01:06:30
    little habits for anyone who's listening
  • 01:06:32
    all these little habits and these little
  • 01:06:33
    changes that you're making they turn
  • 01:06:35
    into values that you appreciate about
  • 01:06:37
    yourself so a value could be and I'm not
  • 01:06:39
    putting a value on you I'm just throwing
  • 01:06:41
    it out there is for a reflection but a
  • 01:06:43
    value could be I like Freedom or I like
  • 01:06:46
    self-expression or I like uh random can
  • 01:06:49
    be a value or whatever it may be and
  • 01:06:52
    like and then those values become things
  • 01:06:54
    you can use in the future for how you
  • 01:06:56
    make decisions now when you make so one
  • 01:06:58
    of my values has always been to take
  • 01:07:00
    risks I feel like I took risks ever
  • 01:07:01
    since I was 14 18 21 and I've noticed
  • 01:07:05
    that pattern in my life and so now when
  • 01:07:07
    I'm taking a risk I'm not that scared
  • 01:07:08
    anymore because I've always taken risks
  • 01:07:10
    my whole life and I love
  • 01:07:13
    how when I first took a risk I didn't
  • 01:07:15
    even know what a risk was like when I
  • 01:07:17
    was 14 years old or 18 I just did it and
  • 01:07:20
    now when I look back I'm like oh no
  • 01:07:21
    that's a skill I have now and so it's
  • 01:07:24
    almost like when you're doing all these
  • 01:07:25
    things you're just collecting lots of
  • 01:07:27
    different like skills and then one day
  • 01:07:29
    they'll evolve into values which will
  • 01:07:31
    form an identity and then you'll be able
  • 01:07:33
    to be like these are the three things
  • 01:07:35
    that I value and that really matter to
  • 01:07:37
    me and you know I love that you I love
  • 01:07:40
    how simple you've made it for yourself
  • 01:07:42
    and I love how you've broken it down
  • 01:07:44
    because I think a lot of us try to like
  • 01:07:47
    Leap Frog to like this is who I am now
  • 01:07:49
    and we almost want the the performance
  • 01:07:52
    part before the work part and it's like
  • 01:07:54
    I feel like you're doing the work part
  • 01:07:56
    yeah and it's it's great to watch it's
  • 01:07:58
    really great to see thank you Charlie
  • 01:07:59
    what have I not asked you about that
  • 01:08:01
    you're like I really want to share this
  • 01:08:02
    so this been on my heart on my mind or
  • 01:08:04
    like something you want to talk about
  • 01:08:05
    that you're like this is what I want to
  • 01:08:07
    use my voice for and you haven't asked
  • 01:08:08
    me about it or it just didn't come up
  • 01:08:10
    something for me that I think is
  • 01:08:13
    very interesting which is very random
  • 01:08:16
    and has nothing to do with my career my
  • 01:08:18
    personal life or anything I love the San
  • 01:08:21
    Diego Safari Park which is so random but
  • 01:08:24
    I've recently found I watch this like
  • 01:08:25
    whole video on it this like very
  • 01:08:28
    specific thing that you have to go
  • 01:08:30
    through a lot of steps to be able to get
  • 01:08:32
    it for like a zoo or aquarium or
  • 01:08:34
    anything but it's a certificate that
  • 01:08:36
    shows if it's Humane to the animals and
  • 01:08:39
    learning about that has been really
  • 01:08:41
    interesting because I love going there
  • 01:08:43
    and I love how free the animals are and
  • 01:08:45
    how it's just like they are in the wild
  • 01:08:47
    and how they help the animals and that's
  • 01:08:49
    definitely something that I want to get
  • 01:08:51
    more into is like figuring out exactly
  • 01:08:53
    what it is and going to more places like
  • 01:08:55
    that and you know not appreciating
  • 01:08:58
    places like SeaWorld that treat their
  • 01:08:59
    animals horribly you know like little
  • 01:09:01
    things like that that I think is so
  • 01:09:02
    interesting cuz I love animals so that
  • 01:09:05
    was something I I need to find the name
  • 01:09:07
    of exactly what that little like thing
  • 01:09:09
    is but it's really cool and like to get
  • 01:09:11
    that you have to go through a lot of
  • 01:09:12
    work and every place is constantly
  • 01:09:14
    trying to outdo each other so the bar is
  • 01:09:16
    constantly being raised which I think is
  • 01:09:18
    so interesting it's the quality of how
  • 01:09:20
    they treat the animals there and they
  • 01:09:22
    have to pass a certain number of right
  • 01:09:24
    right right wow so that's really cool
  • 01:09:26
    and something random that I discovered
  • 01:09:28
    no I love that yeah my my wife's a big
  • 01:09:30
    fan of uh visiting animals as much as we
  • 01:09:33
    can and so she's she's kind of always
  • 01:09:35
    LED there and we've gone to some of the
  • 01:09:37
    randomest places in in LA because of her
  • 01:09:40
    but her relationship with animals is
  • 01:09:42
    really beautiful and she can like you
  • 01:09:44
    know start a relationship with I love
  • 01:09:46
    you know yeah and it's really special to
  • 01:09:47
    watch and it's really interesting
  • 01:09:49
    because we went to a couple last year
  • 01:09:50
    and she'd always come back really like
  • 01:09:53
    even more calm and even more just still
  • 01:09:55
    and and I and it was really beautiful to
  • 01:09:58
    see just how when you're connected to
  • 01:10:01
    Nature and we are nature and you know
  • 01:10:03
    we're a part of that but now we feel so
  • 01:10:05
    disconnected from it but animals are
  • 01:10:07
    such a great way of reconnecting what
  • 01:10:09
    what do you find I guess fulfilling or
  • 01:10:13
    meaningful about being obviously your
  • 01:10:15
    dogs but with these animals like what is
  • 01:10:17
    it about it for you specifically that
  • 01:10:18
    you appreciate about it I think it's
  • 01:10:20
    just
  • 01:10:21
    so peaceful and to learn so so much like
  • 01:10:26
    when you go to these places I will come
  • 01:10:28
    back only talking about animal facts for
  • 01:10:30
    like a month and I love it and sometimes
  • 01:10:34
    people are like that's like where did
  • 01:10:36
    you even come up with that but I think
  • 01:10:38
    it's so cool and so interesting to see
  • 01:10:40
    all these animals
  • 01:10:43
    in with each other and and how they
  • 01:10:46
    respond to things and I love places
  • 01:10:48
    where it's like if they're out and you
  • 01:10:49
    see them that's great if not they don't
  • 01:10:51
    feel like being out that's just how it
  • 01:10:53
    is I just think it's so interesting and
  • 01:10:56
    I literally I've been to the San Diego
  • 01:10:59
    Safari twice and the first time talked
  • 01:11:03
    about animal facts for like 2 months the
  • 01:11:05
    second time I leading up to going that
  • 01:11:09
    was all I could talk about and I brought
  • 01:11:11
    I got so many other people excited about
  • 01:11:13
    it because I like but you don't
  • 01:11:14
    understand how cool it is like you are
  • 01:11:18
    20 ft away from ma cheetah with like
  • 01:11:20
    there's no big fence up you know like
  • 01:11:23
    it's crazy just to see
  • 01:11:26
    these animals just living not worried
  • 01:11:29
    about anything that is so materialistic
  • 01:11:33
    or anything like that like I don't know
  • 01:11:34
    I just find so much joy in it yeah yeah
  • 01:11:37
    definitely have you been to anywhere in
  • 01:11:38
    Africa before I haven't and I really
  • 01:11:40
    want to go I've like I've seen so many
  • 01:11:43
    videos and so many of my friends have
  • 01:11:44
    gone and it just seems so cool yeah I i'
  • 01:11:48
    I've talked about this before on the
  • 01:11:49
    podcast but I'm sharing it because it's
  • 01:11:50
    natural in our conversation I went to
  • 01:11:52
    Rwanda last year wow and Rwanda R's
  • 01:11:55
    gorillas so literally every time there's
  • 01:11:57
    a new gorilla in Rwanda the the
  • 01:11:59
    community comes together and they name
  • 01:12:00
    it and they have this whole ceremony for
  • 01:12:02
    it and so they've had these uh gorilla
  • 01:12:05
    sanctuaries for years and so same as
  • 01:12:07
    what you're saying there's no fences or
  • 01:12:10
    walls or whatever it's basically the
  • 01:12:11
    mountains and you take tracks into the
  • 01:12:14
    mountains and you discover gorilla in
  • 01:12:15
    their natural habitat and there's
  • 01:12:17
    families so we followed we I went three
  • 01:12:20
    days and one of the days we discovered a
  • 01:12:22
    family that had like 20 gorillas in it
  • 01:12:24
    then we discovered another one and you
  • 01:12:25
    get to see the babies and the adults and
  • 01:12:27
    it was easily one of my favorite things
  • 01:12:29
    I've done in my entire life and it was
  • 01:12:33
    just the most magical experience because
  • 01:12:35
    you're truly in nature the animals are
  • 01:12:37
    in their habitat so you're going into
  • 01:12:39
    their home yeah and they're going to Res
  • 01:12:42
    they're so respectful and let you do
  • 01:12:44
    your thing and at the same time you get
  • 01:12:46
    to learn about them in this really
  • 01:12:48
    intimate way it was beautiful to just
  • 01:12:51
    see how they took care of the kids how
  • 01:12:52
    the kids played around how they were
  • 01:12:54
    defens if we got too close like just
  • 01:12:57
    everything about them and the guides
  • 01:12:59
    that we had said that you can also go
  • 01:13:00
    and walk so this was walking with
  • 01:13:02
    gorillas but they said you could go walk
  • 01:13:03
    with elephants too that's cool and me
  • 01:13:05
    and my wife have been talking about
  • 01:13:06
    doing that we're like I'd love to go
  • 01:13:07
    walk with elephants like how cool would
  • 01:13:09
    that be and so there's all these
  • 01:13:10
    incredible experiences out there and you
  • 01:13:12
    know whether it's a local Safari or or
  • 01:13:14
    whether it's being able to go there and
  • 01:13:16
    have this experience I I definitely feel
  • 01:13:20
    and my other team someone on my team's
  • 01:13:21
    been talking about going to see The
  • 01:13:22
    Great Migration which is what so the
  • 01:13:25
    easy version of I'm giving a very bad
  • 01:13:26
    explanation but just to make it
  • 01:13:28
    relatable for everyone it's basically
  • 01:13:30
    what happens in The Lion King when all
  • 01:13:31
    the wilder beast are like running across
  • 01:13:34
    like so that's the Great Migration where
  • 01:13:36
    they're like stampeding across the
  • 01:13:38
    Stampede where maasa unfortunately dies
  • 01:13:40
    like that moment is what the Great
  • 01:13:42
    Migration is and it happens every single
  • 01:13:44
    year that's so cool so yeah anyway I'm
  • 01:13:46
    I'm getting carried away too but no I
  • 01:13:48
    mean it's so easy to yeah it really is
  • 01:13:51
    yeah and it's magical to think that
  • 01:13:52
    these things exist and you can go and
  • 01:13:55
    them or even watch them online or a
  • 01:13:57
    documentary whatever you know well at
  • 01:13:58
    the San Diego Safari they're literally
  • 01:14:01
    like with the southern white rhinos and
  • 01:14:03
    the northern white rhinos it's like one
  • 01:14:05
    one of them is going extinct and they're
  • 01:14:06
    literally figuring out through stem
  • 01:14:08
    cells like how to bring it it back it's
  • 01:14:10
    so so wild and so interesting and
  • 01:14:14
    hearing these people talk about it and
  • 01:14:17
    and all of the steps they're going
  • 01:14:18
    through with scientists and zoologists
  • 01:14:21
    and literally everyone to help you know
  • 01:14:24
    bring back the species of R rhinos it's
  • 01:14:27
    like this is so cool and has nothing to
  • 01:14:30
    do with anything that I do in my normal
  • 01:14:32
    everyday life but how interesting is
  • 01:14:35
    that to just hear and and see and like
  • 01:14:40
    what that's crazy but I don't know I
  • 01:14:42
    just think that that's so cool I love it
  • 01:14:45
    I love it and I hope you just keep
  • 01:14:46
    pursuing and following all of these
  • 01:14:48
    things that you think are cool and you
  • 01:14:50
    know you're it's not that you don't know
  • 01:14:52
    yourself I wouldn't say that you don't
  • 01:14:53
    know who you are I just say that you're
  • 01:14:55
    you're firmly on that path yeah like
  • 01:14:57
    you're on that path of self-discovery
  • 01:14:59
    and you're doing it at a perfect time in
  • 01:15:01
    your life and you're taking every one of
  • 01:15:03
    the right steps like you know it's not
  • 01:15:05
    that you don't know who you are or
  • 01:15:06
    you're confused you're just you're just
  • 01:15:09
    taking those steps and and all of it's
  • 01:15:11
    going to become more and more clear as
  • 01:15:13
    you continue to take more steps So yeah
  • 01:15:15
    thank you for sharing the this part of
  • 01:15:17
    the journey with me because I'm hoping
  • 01:15:20
    that in a few years time you'll come
  • 01:15:22
    back and then you'll be like Jay I
  • 01:15:24
    figured this out these are all of my
  • 01:15:26
    favorite things that I've decided yeah
  • 01:15:28
    yeah and I and I hope and I hope they'll
  • 01:15:30
    change again and you know I but I I'm
  • 01:15:33
    glad that you came and shared this part
  • 01:15:35
    because this is the hardest part to
  • 01:15:36
    share when you're not sure and you're
  • 01:15:39
    figuring it out and I'm glad that we had
  • 01:15:41
    the opportunity to capture that today
  • 01:15:43
    yeah and I'm really really appreciate
  • 01:15:47
    you sharing that with people because it
  • 01:15:48
    is the hardest part to share when you're
  • 01:15:50
    like I don't know I'm not quite there
  • 01:15:52
    but this is where I am now yeah perfect
  • 01:15:55
    Charlie thank you so much no thank for
  • 01:15:58
    coming on the show today and we end
  • 01:16:00
    every episode with a final five and
  • 01:16:02
    these I'm going to totally ruin these
  • 01:16:04
    because I enjoy doing that but you meant
  • 01:16:06
    to answer them in one word to one
  • 01:16:08
    sentence maximum but I will probably ask
  • 01:16:11
    you to expand because they always lead
  • 01:16:13
    to more thoughtful answers so all right
  • 01:16:15
    Charlie these are your final five the
  • 01:16:17
    first question is what is the best
  • 01:16:18
    advice you've ever heard or received or
  • 01:16:21
    even given to someone this is probably
  • 01:16:23
    the only thing that keeps me me saying
  • 01:16:26
    whether it's good or bad everything
  • 01:16:28
    happens for a reason you can't control
  • 01:16:31
    it and that's something you hold on to
  • 01:16:33
    it sounds like makes me feel like I'm
  • 01:16:35
    not going crazy when have you used that
  • 01:16:37
    the most you can expand Beyond one
  • 01:16:39
    sentence I mean when I feel like I have
  • 01:16:42
    no idea what to do next or I feel like
  • 01:16:45
    everything's coming crashing down this
  • 01:16:47
    is important because it's helping me get
  • 01:16:49
    to the next step of my life and as much
  • 01:16:51
    as this sucks right now I need it and
  • 01:16:55
    some of the worst Parts where I I feel
  • 01:16:57
    like I'm at an all-time low that helped
  • 01:17:00
    me get to that next step so next time
  • 01:17:03
    I'm I'm feeling like that I know how to
  • 01:17:04
    I know first I can get myself out of it
  • 01:17:07
    and second that you know maybe it's not
  • 01:17:10
    that big of a deal and in a year not
  • 01:17:13
    even going to remember it absolutely
  • 01:17:15
    love that all right second question
  • 01:17:17
    what's the worst advice you've ever had
  • 01:17:19
    or
  • 01:17:20
    received probably that I need
  • 01:17:23
    to say yes to everything because you
  • 01:17:26
    don't know when this is going to
  • 01:17:27
    end sometimes you just need to say no
  • 01:17:30
    and take that time for yourself I'm so
  • 01:17:32
    glad you brought that up so many young
  • 01:17:34
    creators here that just overwhelm
  • 01:17:37
    themselves and it's you're doing a
  • 01:17:40
    disservice to yourself give yourself
  • 01:17:42
    time to figure out who you
  • 01:17:44
    are and I think you're so right like
  • 01:17:47
    I've I've said this to a lot of people
  • 01:17:49
    too
  • 01:17:51
    that it will only end when you want it
  • 01:17:54
    to like nothing can end if you're if
  • 01:17:56
    you're alive and you're creating and
  • 01:17:59
    you're building like things just don't
  • 01:18:00
    end and I think we use the end as a
  • 01:18:03
    scarcity tactic or a fear tactic to get
  • 01:18:06
    more out of someone or to get the most
  • 01:18:08
    out of it right now not realizing that
  • 01:18:11
    someone could take a break for three
  • 01:18:12
    years if that's what they wanted to do
  • 01:18:14
    and come back even stronger and bigger
  • 01:18:16
    and better and whatever and I just don't
  • 01:18:18
    think we allow people to have that space
  • 01:18:21
    and I think it's really unhealthy for
  • 01:18:23
    anyone to think that oh if I'm not don't
  • 01:18:25
    do this I'm going to be irrelevant or
  • 01:18:26
    whatever it's like actually if you're an
  • 01:18:28
    artist you could take time out and come
  • 01:18:30
    back in years from now and create a
  • 01:18:32
    masterpiece yeah I mean the first like
  • 01:18:36
    three years of my career all anyone was
  • 01:18:38
    saying was it could be over like that no
  • 01:18:40
    one's going to care about you and I
  • 01:18:42
    spent so much time when is it going to
  • 01:18:45
    end everyone keeps telling me it's going
  • 01:18:46
    to end like do I want it to end maybe I
  • 01:18:49
    want it to end maybe I want a break and
  • 01:18:51
    it just to all be over and go back to my
  • 01:18:52
    normal life I've Tak breaks I've taken
  • 01:18:55
    step backs I've done everything that was
  • 01:18:59
    coming to me at the moment and it's like
  • 01:19:02
    letting whether the people that are
  • 01:19:05
    watching you are going to stay or leave
  • 01:19:07
    dictate every move you make those people
  • 01:19:09
    that really care about you they're not
  • 01:19:11
    just going to leave if you stop posting
  • 01:19:13
    for a month or a week or however long
  • 01:19:16
    like put your
  • 01:19:18
    own mental state first yeah yeah because
  • 01:19:22
    if you don't put your mental state first
  • 01:19:24
    then then it's definitely going to go
  • 01:19:25
    away yeah you're going to get burnt out
  • 01:19:27
    and then no one's going to care cuz you
  • 01:19:28
    don't care exactly or you're not going
  • 01:19:30
    to be able to put anything out like you
  • 01:19:32
    know and if you look at that perspective
  • 01:19:34
    it's like yeah you just keep pushing and
  • 01:19:35
    pushing and pushing you lose yourself
  • 01:19:37
    and then you have nothing to share and
  • 01:19:39
    then you've definitely you know lost out
  • 01:19:41
    no really really great answer I love
  • 01:19:43
    that uh question number three what is
  • 01:19:45
    the craziest rumors you've heard about
  • 01:19:48
    yourself one that made you laugh and one
  • 01:19:50
    that made you cry ones that make me
  • 01:19:53
    laugh are
  • 01:19:57
    probably the ones where I'll like I'll
  • 01:19:59
    seem
  • 01:20:01
    super I'll see like blind items about
  • 01:20:05
    myself and it's like she did this crazy
  • 01:20:09
    thing at this party and it was wild and
  • 01:20:12
    and I was like didn't even go to a party
  • 01:20:14
    that's so like like where did you guys
  • 01:20:17
    come up with this I wasn't even there um
  • 01:20:19
    so those ones always make me laugh when
  • 01:20:21
    they're like so not true I just have to
  • 01:20:23
    be like okay
  • 01:20:25
    crazy yeah I it's funny you said about
  • 01:20:28
    not being at the party like so I I
  • 01:20:31
    officiated Ben and Jen's wedding last
  • 01:20:33
    year and there was a guest list that was
  • 01:20:36
    printed and the guest list just had
  • 01:20:38
    everyone's name on it and everyone was
  • 01:20:41
    like asking me like oh did you see this
  • 01:20:43
    person did you see this person I was
  • 01:20:44
    like they weren't there like it was a
  • 01:20:46
    really private wedding yeah but it's
  • 01:20:48
    like everyone assumes that all these
  • 01:20:50
    people were there now that all these
  • 01:20:51
    magazines are printed it everyone
  • 01:20:53
    assumes that it was just this big
  • 01:20:54
    celebrity wedding it's like well it
  • 01:20:56
    wasn't it it was just a really intimate
  • 01:20:58
    friends and family wedding makes you
  • 01:21:00
    laugh you guys pulled this out of
  • 01:21:02
    nowhere nowhere like it was just crazy
  • 01:21:04
    to me I was like how do you make this up
  • 01:21:06
    like you know and so there was no
  • 01:21:08
    official guest list printed externally
  • 01:21:10
    anyway all right uh yeah and then one
  • 01:21:12
    that kind of like got to you or if there
  • 01:21:14
    was one that like made you more
  • 01:21:15
    emotional or things that make you more
  • 01:21:16
    emotional in general like things that
  • 01:21:18
    make me more emotional are definitely
  • 01:21:21
    ones that try to display my character in
  • 01:21:25
    a way where you know I I don't want to
  • 01:21:30
    defend everything that I do I don't want
  • 01:21:32
    to defend every rumor that comes out
  • 01:21:34
    about me but it's like to think that
  • 01:21:37
    people think I'm capable of
  • 01:21:39
    doing these things that you know are
  • 01:21:42
    sometimes so horrible or you know there
  • 01:21:47
    especially when I was like 16 16 was
  • 01:21:51
    really hard for me and I would hear the
  • 01:21:54
    grown adults every single day Charlie
  • 01:21:57
    did this Charlie did that Charlie did
  • 01:21:59
    this I literally it was actually right
  • 01:22:02
    when I hit a 100 million I think I was
  • 01:22:04
    at the lowest mental state possible and
  • 01:22:07
    I looked so happy
  • 01:22:10
    online and it got to the point where I
  • 01:22:12
    was I was like I not doing this anymore
  • 01:22:16
    like I physically cannot do this like it
  • 01:22:20
    got really dark to where I was like I
  • 01:22:21
    don't even want to be here anymore and I
  • 01:22:25
    think back to those times and the grown
  • 01:22:27
    adults that put 16-year-old me in that
  • 01:22:31
    mindset and I'm just like like you guys
  • 01:22:34
    have kids now like you guys are are
  • 01:22:39
    grown and first of all never got an
  • 01:22:41
    apology through a direct message never
  • 01:22:44
    got an apology or anything besides if it
  • 01:22:47
    was for other people or that they want
  • 01:22:51
    something from me and I just like
  • 01:22:55
    I wish that they could see what they did
  • 01:22:57
    to me and how truly horrible they
  • 01:23:00
    treated
  • 01:23:01
    me and like what if that was your kid
  • 01:23:04
    what if what if that was you how would
  • 01:23:06
    you feel and like I'm so proud of myself
  • 01:23:11
    for getting myself through that cuz that
  • 01:23:14
    really like depending on how I responded
  • 01:23:17
    to that could have changed the
  • 01:23:18
    trajectory of my life whether I started
  • 01:23:21
    to cope in unhealthy ways or or or
  • 01:23:25
    harmed myself or did something that you
  • 01:23:28
    know would make these people feel bad
  • 01:23:32
    like I'm just very glad that I have the
  • 01:23:35
    people around me and also got to give
  • 01:23:37
    some credit to myself was able to get
  • 01:23:39
    out of that M I can't I mean even just
  • 01:23:42
    hearing you talk about it like it feels
  • 01:23:44
    so hard and heavy and like I can feel
  • 01:23:47
    how intense it could have been like what
  • 01:23:49
    got you through that like what was it
  • 01:23:51
    that because at 16 I mean you don't have
  • 01:23:53
    a lot to pull on like what gets you
  • 01:23:55
    through all of that especially being
  • 01:23:57
    around you know now your family's more
  • 01:23:59
    used to it so everyone has a bit more
  • 01:24:01
    doesn't make it easier I'm not saying it
  • 01:24:03
    makes it easier but people are more
  • 01:24:05
    aware of it yeah for sure but at that
  • 01:24:07
    time it's like right at the
  • 01:24:09
    beginning you
  • 01:24:11
    know it was really hard for a long time
  • 01:24:15
    and especially at that point I showed
  • 01:24:18
    myself in a very specific light
  • 01:24:21
    and didn't want to let anyone know it
  • 01:24:24
    was getting to me and then I would go
  • 01:24:26
    and and cry on live and and I think back
  • 01:24:29
    to that and I think it was the people
  • 01:24:33
    that I had around me like it was getting
  • 01:24:35
    to the point where like people were
  • 01:24:36
    coming to my house to check on me like
  • 01:24:38
    it was bad and like I don't know if
  • 01:24:41
    these people that did this like I think
  • 01:24:43
    they know who they are but are ever
  • 01:24:45
    going to see this like first of all I
  • 01:24:47
    think I deserve an apology second of all
  • 01:24:50
    not that I need one because I'm content
  • 01:24:52
    with how it happened whatever but the
  • 01:24:55
    fact that there's no accountability for
  • 01:24:57
    those people but there was so much
  • 01:24:59
    accountability for a 16-year-old I think
  • 01:25:02
    is so wild and there's so like honestly
  • 01:25:06
    the hardest stuff to deal with was the
  • 01:25:07
    people that were grown adults that were
  • 01:25:10
    like just ripping on me every second of
  • 01:25:13
    every day like 20 videos like what I now
  • 01:25:18
    look back and I'm so disgusted by the
  • 01:25:21
    fact that these people like thought that
  • 01:25:22
    that was okay it's so wild and I'm just
  • 01:25:26
    I'm very thankful that I had my friends
  • 01:25:29
    and my family
  • 01:25:31
    and enough in myself to want to get
  • 01:25:36
    through it and come out the other side
  • 01:25:38
    and show these people that they can't
  • 01:25:41
    ruin me and I have more to show people
  • 01:25:46
    than what I've done so
  • 01:25:48
    far that's so powerful and it's so no it
  • 01:25:51
    really is it's so powerful to hear that
  • 01:25:53
    and it's it it breaks my heart hearing
  • 01:25:55
    it too
  • 01:25:57
    because I totally get what you're saying
  • 01:25:59
    in terms of just like when you have kids
  • 01:26:02
    we live in a world that wants to
  • 01:26:03
    prioritize mental health but then when
  • 01:26:05
    we take people apart whether they've
  • 01:26:07
    made a mistake or not yeah we're not
  • 01:26:09
    mindful of their mental health at all
  • 01:26:12
    and it's almost like if someone's made a
  • 01:26:14
    mistake or maybe not even made a mistake
  • 01:26:16
    it's almost like well now we don't have
  • 01:26:18
    to treat them as if they have mental
  • 01:26:20
    health yeah at all or it's like people
  • 01:26:23
    loved me because I was n perfect and I
  • 01:26:25
    was authentic but then anytime I would
  • 01:26:28
    mix up my words or make a mistake or do
  • 01:26:31
    anything outside of what was okay for
  • 01:26:34
    these people it was like yeah well I
  • 01:26:37
    hate her and everyone should hate her
  • 01:26:38
    and she's a horrible person because of
  • 01:26:40
    this and I was like but what did I do
  • 01:26:43
    like it was so hard to come to terms to
  • 01:26:44
    the fact that so many people hated me
  • 01:26:48
    mhm and I was just doing my best I was
  • 01:26:51
    like but I I don't get get it like all I
  • 01:26:55
    do is try to please everyone around me
  • 01:26:57
    and they're not happy like how do I how
  • 01:27:00
    do I do this I'm never going to win and
  • 01:27:04
    you know that's really hard like I give
  • 01:27:07
    myself so much credit for how I handled
  • 01:27:09
    this stuff the best way I knew how
  • 01:27:14
    like so wild if you ever doubt how tough
  • 01:27:17
    you are you just got to remember 16year
  • 01:27:19
    old Charlie cuz she was a beast that's
  • 01:27:22
    so tough that is really really intense
  • 01:27:25
    it is really really intense how have you
  • 01:27:27
    dealt with that feeling of like trying
  • 01:27:29
    to keep everyone else I know you've
  • 01:27:31
    talked about it before the idea of like
  • 01:27:32
    trying to keep everyone else afloat and
  • 01:27:34
    you want to kind of let go of that
  • 01:27:36
    pressure do you feel like you've let go
  • 01:27:38
    of it or do you feel like you're letting
  • 01:27:39
    go of it I think I am in certain aspects
  • 01:27:42
    but also leaning into it a little you
  • 01:27:44
    know like maybe not what the internet
  • 01:27:47
    wants but what does my family want what
  • 01:27:49
    do my friends want what does my
  • 01:27:50
    boyfriend want you know like those
  • 01:27:53
    people what do my true fans want what do
  • 01:27:56
    they want me to put out that would make
  • 01:27:58
    them happy cuz I'm doing it for these
  • 01:28:01
    people and maybe if I'm feeling a little
  • 01:28:04
    bit burnt out right now I really think
  • 01:28:07
    back to well this is the reason that I
  • 01:28:09
    started doing it you know but
  • 01:28:14
    also understanding that I have to listen
  • 01:28:16
    to myself and what I need yeah figuring
  • 01:28:19
    out that balance which I don't think
  • 01:28:21
    I'll ever truly get the hang of because
  • 01:28:23
    it's always changing but at least
  • 01:28:26
    acknowledging it mhm mhm all right
  • 01:28:28
    question four and five lost two
  • 01:28:30
    questions what's something new that
  • 01:28:32
    you're trying to learn this year or
  • 01:28:34
    something that a skill that you're
  • 01:28:36
    trying to develop I want to get better
  • 01:28:38
    at
  • 01:28:39
    packing I love that and like traveling
  • 01:28:41
    cuz you travel so much yeah and it's
  • 01:28:43
    such a stressor for me literally every
  • 01:28:46
    single time before I leave for a trip I
  • 01:28:48
    will have a little mental breakdown full
  • 01:28:52
    like tears everything
  • 01:28:55
    it's a that's another control thing and
  • 01:28:58
    a very obsessive compulsive thing that I
  • 01:29:02
    do because I like to have my stuff
  • 01:29:04
    around me I like to have my things I
  • 01:29:06
    like to
  • 01:29:07
    have everything that I could possibly
  • 01:29:09
    need like even in my purse I have
  • 01:29:11
    everything that I could possibly need
  • 01:29:13
    for if I go on a 3-day vacation like it
  • 01:29:17
    just causes me so much stress that I
  • 01:29:18
    would like to be able to take a
  • 01:29:21
    overnight trip and just like can go
  • 01:29:24
    without worrying so much like that would
  • 01:29:26
    be the dream yeah that's a great that I
  • 01:29:29
    think that's a great skill that I wish
  • 01:29:30
    everyone was to out definitely there are
  • 01:29:33
    great Packers and there are bad Packers
  • 01:29:35
    and I'm a bad Packer for sure and I get
  • 01:29:37
    that do what my wife does my wife just
  • 01:29:39
    takes six suitcases she just lit my
  • 01:29:41
    sister she will go places pack like an
  • 01:29:44
    hour before she's like only brought one
  • 01:29:47
    shoe yeah like how how do you do this
  • 01:29:50
    this is insane yeah that's amazing I
  • 01:29:53
    love love it all right great Charlie
  • 01:29:55
    final question Fifth and final question
  • 01:29:57
    if you could and you can take your time
  • 01:29:58
    with this if you could create one rule
  • 01:30:01
    or one law that everyone in the world
  • 01:30:03
    had to follow what would it be lead with
  • 01:30:07
    empathy don't be so hard on every single
  • 01:30:12
    thing every situation everything no
  • 01:30:15
    matter what like you never ever know
  • 01:30:18
    what someone's truly going through even
  • 01:30:22
    you can ask me what's wrong and I get
  • 01:30:24
    tell you one thing and maybe deep down
  • 01:30:25
    it's something else that I'm embarrassed
  • 01:30:27
    to tell you about like you just never
  • 01:30:30
    know the struggle that someone's dealing
  • 01:30:32
    with when they're by themselves so just
  • 01:30:34
    be a little more empathetic I feel like
  • 01:30:36
    Co really you know caused people to
  • 01:30:40
    react fast just take a step back you
  • 01:30:44
    know cure people
  • 01:30:45
    out just calm down calm down a little
  • 01:30:49
    bit yeah it's so needed for oursel and
  • 01:30:51
    others and it's amazing how many of us
  • 01:30:54
    we all know we need that
  • 01:30:56
    world but it's almost like the system
  • 01:30:59
    and society and the way it works it's
  • 01:31:01
    set up to make us not be that yeah right
  • 01:31:04
    like we all want that we all say that
  • 01:31:05
    and then something happens in the press
  • 01:31:07
    and then everyone jumps on it and like
  • 01:31:09
    it and I have to say that to myself too
  • 01:31:11
    yeah keep yourself in check you know
  • 01:31:14
    definitely Charlie I love how this
  • 01:31:16
    conversation's been so fun and deep and
  • 01:31:19
    like random and unique and I love that
  • 01:31:22
    because that's what all of us are right
  • 01:31:24
    think if you try and have a conversation
  • 01:31:26
    that's just deep or just cool or just
  • 01:31:28
    whatever it doesn't work but when you
  • 01:31:29
    just get to know someone 360 it's it's a
  • 01:31:32
    bit quirky it's a bit funny it's it was
  • 01:31:34
    super thoughtful and insightful and I'm
  • 01:31:36
    so glad that it was truly you I hope you
  • 01:31:38
    felt that way yeah definitely this is
  • 01:31:41
    refreshing for me good I'm glad and
  • 01:31:43
    thank you so much for trusting me and uh
  • 01:31:45
    being here and I'm so grateful and
  • 01:31:47
    everyone who's been listening or
  • 01:31:47
    watching whether you're walking your
  • 01:31:49
    dogs because I know you do that whether
  • 01:31:51
    you're at the gym whether you're driving
  • 01:31:53
    to and from work work or whether you're
  • 01:31:55
    editing a video right now I want to say
  • 01:31:57
    thank you to you for listening and I
  • 01:31:58
    hope that you're going to share your
  • 01:32:00
    highlights of so many great insights
  • 01:32:02
    thoughts just Reflections I think that
  • 01:32:04
    Charlie shared with us today make sure
  • 01:32:06
    you share the ones that stood out to you
  • 01:32:08
    tag both me and Charlie as well whether
  • 01:32:10
    you're using Tik Tok X or Instagram
  • 01:32:12
    because I love seeing what you related
  • 01:32:14
    to and what you connected to there was
  • 01:32:15
    so many parts today I felt when I was
  • 01:32:18
    listening I was like oh I get that like
  • 01:32:19
    I hear that and I want to know what you
  • 01:32:21
    heard and what you understood and what
  • 01:32:23
    you learned uh Charlie thank you so much
  • 01:32:25
    again I hope you come on many many more
  • 01:32:26
    times in the fut than you for having me
  • 01:32:28
    seriously this was really nice to be
  • 01:32:31
    able to have the space to talk about
  • 01:32:34
    anything well you're always welcome
  • 01:32:35
    thank you you're always welcome thank
  • 01:32:37
    you if you love this episode you will
  • 01:32:39
    also love my interview with Kendall
  • 01:32:41
    Jenner on setting boundaries to increase
  • 01:32:44
    happiness and healing your inner child
  • 01:32:47
    you could be reading something that
  • 01:32:48
    someone is saying about you and being
  • 01:32:50
    like that is so unfair cuz that's not
  • 01:32:51
    who I am and that really gets to me
  • 01:32:54
    sometimes but then looking at myself in
  • 01:32:55
    the mirror and being like but I know who
  • 01:32:57
    I am why does anything else matter
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