7 Habits of Top 1% Women

00:18:58
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y1WpBADjNm4

Résumé

TLDRIn this video, Dr. Fay shares her insights into the habits that distinguish the top 1% of successful women. Drawing from her experiences and scientific research, she highlights seven crucial habits: 1) financial empowerment through investment; 2) building self-trust by keeping promises to oneself; 3) learning to say no to prevent burnout; 4) using detailed visualization for goal setting; 5) conducting regular energy audits to evaluate influences in life; 6) leveraging 'weak ties' in networking; and 7) embracing failure as a learning opportunity. Each habit emphasizes personal development, resilience, and strategic thinking in both personal and professional spheres.

A retenir

  • 💰 Financial empowerment is key to independence.
  • 🤝 Build self-trust by keeping promises to yourself.
  • 🚫 Saying no helps prevent burnout.
  • 🧠 Visualization can enhance goal achievement.
  • ⚡ Conduct regular energy audits for better focus.
  • 🌐 Develop weak ties for more opportunities.
  • 📈 Learn from failure as a step toward success.

Chronologie

  • 00:00:00 - 00:05:00

    The speaker introduces the concept of becoming a top 1% woman, emphasizing that success is not based on luck or genetics but on specific habits. The first habit discussed is financial empowerment, highlighting the importance of understanding money management and investing. Women, on average, are effective investors but often lack confidence, leading to underinvestment. The speaker advocates for eliminating negative attitudes towards money and encourages small steps in financial education to promote empowerment.

  • 00:05:00 - 00:10:00

    The second habit focuses on self-trust and keeping promises to oneself, suggesting that high-achieving women build confidence through consistency. Keeping small promises can release dopamine, reinforcing the idea of self-trust. The emphasis is on starting small and proving reliability to oneself to cultivate confidence and discipline for larger goals. The importance of micro-promises was demonstrated in a study related to adherence to goals.

  • 00:10:00 - 00:18:58

    The third habit is the ability to say 'no', an essential skill for women to prevent emotional suppression and burnout. The speaker discusses the detrimental health effects of constantly saying yes to commitments that drain energy and promotes the idea of setting boundaries. Practical phrases to use instead of over-explaining refusals are suggested to protect emotional well-being, underlining the need to honor personal limits and mental health.

Carte mentale

Vidéo Q&R

  • What are the seven habits successful women practice?

    1. Financial Empowerment 2. Self-Trust Capital 3. The Power of Saying No 4. The Mirror Rule 5. Energy Audit 6. Building Social Currency 7. The Bounce Back Code.

  • How can I increase my financial knowledge?

    Start by reading books on investing or taking classes on budgeting.

  • Why is saying no important?

    Saying no helps prevent burnout and allows you to prioritize your own needs and health.

  • What is the bounce back code?

    It's the understanding that failure is a learning opportunity, not an endpoint.

  • How do I create a vision board effectively?

    Make sure it's specific and backed by neuroscience techniques for it to shape your goals.

  • What is self-trust capital?

    It's the trust you build in yourself by consistently keeping promises you make to yourself.

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  • 00:00:00
    we've all had one of those friends never
  • 00:00:03
    broke never shy always looking flawless
  • 00:00:06
    succeeding in every aspect of their life
  • 00:00:08
    but what if I told you it's not luck
  • 00:00:11
    it's not genetics and is almost
  • 00:00:13
    certainly not waking up at 5:00 a.m.
  • 00:00:14
    drinking a celery juice and journaling
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    in your 50 notebook we can all be that
  • 00:00:20
    woman because the truth is the women who
  • 00:00:23
    actually set themselves apart the 1%
  • 00:00:26
    women live by a completely different set
  • 00:00:28
    of rules and today I'm breaking down the
  • 00:00:31
    seven habits that make the biggest
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    difference using science hello if you
  • 00:00:37
    are new here then my name is Fay I'm a
  • 00:00:39
    doctor working in London and now my life
  • 00:00:41
    runs like a well-oiled machine however
  • 00:00:44
    that was absolutely not the case I have
  • 00:00:47
    failed I have flopped I have fallen flat
  • 00:00:49
    on my face and documented every single
  • 00:00:52
    step of the way in hopes that I can help
  • 00:00:55
    others not flop in the same way by being
  • 00:00:58
    obsessed with the psychology and science
  • 00:01:01
    behind self-development and living a
  • 00:01:03
    happier healthier life so if that sounds
  • 00:01:05
    like a little bit of you then the
  • 00:01:07
    Subscribe button is just down there so
  • 00:01:10
    habit number one we need to talk about
  • 00:01:12
    the power Pierce and I do not think
  • 00:01:13
    there is another habit that is as
  • 00:01:16
    important as this one I'm about to talk
  • 00:01:18
    about because you can definitely become
  • 00:01:20
    a top 1% woman without the genetics
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    however if you have mommy and daddy's
  • 00:01:26
    money to fall back on then that
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    definitely helps unfort fortunately I
  • 00:01:30
    was not blessed with the bank of M and
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    dad and I also think that by not coming
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    from a wealthy background there's also
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    huge disadvantages in the way money is
  • 00:01:40
    talked about and the attitudes that you
  • 00:01:43
    grow up having about money Financial
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    Empowerment is crucial for women and
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    we've come so far since the first time
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    women were allowed credit cards in the
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    60s but we still have so much further to
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    go the wealthiest most successful women
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    don't just just save money have you seen
  • 00:02:02
    the regular interest rates on savings
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    accounts at the moment no no no no no
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    they make their money work for them in
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    their sleep when they're at work when
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    they're out enjoying themselves their
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    money is growing without them having to
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    lift a finger and to do that they
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    educate themselves financially so they
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    know exactly the best and safest way to
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    move with power in this Dreadful economy
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    a 2024 study by Fidelity in Investments
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    actually revealed that 71% of women now
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    own investments in the stock market an
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    18% increase from the previous year this
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    uptick is significant yet the challenges
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    still remain studies show that women on
  • 00:02:43
    average are actually better investors
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    than men because they take a more
  • 00:02:48
    strategic long-term approach but they
  • 00:02:51
    also invest less often use to lack of
  • 00:02:54
    confidence or financial education I also
  • 00:02:57
    think this is a really important topic
  • 00:02:59
    especially especially in the age where
  • 00:03:01
    Trad lives are making a comeback stop
  • 00:03:03
    seeing money as a way to buy luxuries
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    but your ticket to a life of comfort and
  • 00:03:08
    security having the stability to leave a
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    marriage you hate or a job that is
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    burning you to the ground I know it's
  • 00:03:16
    overwhelming but I strongly feel as
  • 00:03:19
    though this culture around it being rude
  • 00:03:22
    and Unbecoming to talk about money is
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    meant to keep women and anyone who
  • 00:03:27
    doesn't come from a privileged
  • 00:03:29
    background away from learning about
  • 00:03:31
    money so they are stuck but to help with
  • 00:03:34
    the overwhelm we're going to start small
  • 00:03:36
    read a book on investing do a skillshare
  • 00:03:39
    class on budgeting stop saying that you
  • 00:03:42
    are bad with money you're not you just
  • 00:03:45
    haven't learned yet habit number two
  • 00:03:49
    trust capital and this one is for the
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    girlies who say they're going to do
  • 00:03:53
    something and never actually do it I'm
  • 00:03:56
    looking at you and not with judgment I
  • 00:03:58
    promise because I have been there but
  • 00:04:00
    the top 1% of women do not break
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    promises with themselves if you tell a
  • 00:04:05
    friend that you're going to meet them
  • 00:04:06
    for coffee you'll turn up but when you
  • 00:04:09
    promise yourself that you're going to go
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    to the gym wake up early start a
  • 00:04:14
    business suddenly that becomes optional
  • 00:04:17
    why do you have more respect for your
  • 00:04:19
    friend's time than your own maybe is
  • 00:04:22
    because you know that you can't rely on
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    yourself top 1% women know that
  • 00:04:27
    confidence doesn't come from affirmation
  • 00:04:30
    in the mirror it comes from self trust
  • 00:04:32
    every time you keep a promise to
  • 00:04:34
    yourself you build evidence that you can
  • 00:04:37
    rely on you every time you follow
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    through on a commitment every time you
  • 00:04:41
    make a financial investment the more
  • 00:04:43
    confident and disciplined you become
  • 00:04:45
    because you learn to trust yourself
  • 00:04:48
    again a 2021 study in the Journal of
  • 00:04:51
    Behavioral Medicine tracked 500 people
  • 00:04:54
    for 18 months those who kept micro
  • 00:04:57
    promises to themselves like walk 10
  • 00:04:59
    minutes every single day saw a 4% higher
  • 00:05:02
    goal adherence than those chasing big
  • 00:05:05
    wins why because every promise kept
  • 00:05:08
    releases dopamine rewiring your brain to
  • 00:05:12
    associate action with reward and trust
  • 00:05:15
    yourself again so what's the key here
  • 00:05:18
    High achieving women don't rely on
  • 00:05:20
    motivation they build self-trust Capital
  • 00:05:23
    by starting small proving that they can
  • 00:05:25
    be trusted with a little and progressing
  • 00:05:28
    to trusting themselves with a lot so
  • 00:05:30
    your homework tonight if you say you're
  • 00:05:33
    going to read 10 pages before bed do it
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    the action doesn't even really matter
  • 00:05:39
    the more important thing is proving to
  • 00:05:41
    yourself you do what you say you're
  • 00:05:43
    going to do habit number three the
  • 00:05:45
    refuse reset as women we're taught to be
  • 00:05:49
    polite quiet go along with the flow
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    pretend to be a little duck floating
  • 00:05:54
    along the surface whilst our legs
  • 00:05:57
    frantically kick below all of this means
  • 00:06:00
    that women often struggle saying one of
  • 00:06:03
    the most important words in the English
  • 00:06:05
    language no research shows that women
  • 00:06:08
    are more likely to suppress their
  • 00:06:09
    emotions take on others burdens and
  • 00:06:12
    overextend themselves in both
  • 00:06:14
    professional and personal spheres it's
  • 00:06:17
    deeply ingrained in our social
  • 00:06:19
    conditioning we're taught to be
  • 00:06:21
    caretakers nurturers and people pleases
  • 00:06:24
    but not being able to say no isn't just
  • 00:06:26
    a one-way ticket to burnout town There's
  • 00:06:28
    also research to suggest it has pretty
  • 00:06:32
    serious consequences studies
  • 00:06:34
    consistently show that chronic emotional
  • 00:06:36
    suppression essentially the act of
  • 00:06:38
    bottling up our feelings and constantly
  • 00:06:40
    prioritizing others over ourselves can
  • 00:06:43
    significantly impact Women's Health a
  • 00:06:46
    2018 study found that women who
  • 00:06:48
    consistently suppress their emotions are
  • 00:06:51
    at a higher risk of autoimmune diseases
  • 00:06:54
    like lupus and rheumatoid arthritis the
  • 00:06:57
    research suggests that emotional
  • 00:06:59
    depression triggers chronic stress which
  • 00:07:01
    can suppress the immune system over time
  • 00:07:04
    leading to inflammation and higher
  • 00:07:06
    susceptibility to illness and that's
  • 00:07:08
    before we even get into mental health
  • 00:07:11
    conditions if you constantly say yes to
  • 00:07:13
    things that drain you then you are
  • 00:07:15
    running on borrowed energy and at some
  • 00:07:18
    point it's going to run out the good
  • 00:07:20
    news is if the big Eno is absolutely
  • 00:07:23
    terrifying to you then you can start
  • 00:07:25
    small Begin by simply acknowledging how
  • 00:07:28
    it makes you feel to even think of
  • 00:07:31
    saying the word no it's normal and this
  • 00:07:34
    is all part of how to retrain your brain
  • 00:07:38
    you don't need to deliver a long-winded
  • 00:07:40
    excuse apology or even white lie because
  • 00:07:43
    that is almost just as stressful in
  • 00:07:45
    itself instead here are a couple
  • 00:07:48
    sentences I would like you to swiftly
  • 00:07:50
    add to your vocabulary I'd love to but I
  • 00:07:54
    can't right now or simply that doesn't
  • 00:07:57
    work for me you don't owe any one an
  • 00:08:00
    explanation protect your peace as if
  • 00:08:02
    your life depends on it because quite
  • 00:08:04
    honestly it does number four the mirror
  • 00:08:07
    rule why do some people fail and others
  • 00:08:11
    seem to always succeed the answer May
  • 00:08:14
    lie in a part of the brain called the
  • 00:08:16
    visual cortex and here is how you are
  • 00:08:19
    going to hijack it a lot of people fail
  • 00:08:22
    because they seem to set vague goals
  • 00:08:24
    like I want to be successful but the top
  • 00:08:26
    1% women they get specific they create a
  • 00:08:30
    vision so clear that they can see it
  • 00:08:32
    they can feel it and step into it on a
  • 00:08:35
    daily basis a 2019 Nature Neuroscience
  • 00:08:38
    study found that Vivid mental imagery
  • 00:08:41
    activates the brain's occipital lobe
  • 00:08:44
    which is the vision center and the
  • 00:08:46
    prefrontal cortex which is the planning
  • 00:08:49
    Hub of the brain this creates a mental
  • 00:08:52
    blueprint that drives action forward so
  • 00:08:55
    what does any of this actually mean it
  • 00:08:57
    means that research into cognitive
  • 00:08:59
    Neuroscience shows us that when you
  • 00:09:01
    visualize something in detail your brain
  • 00:09:04
    lights up as if you're actually
  • 00:09:05
    experiencing it this strengthens neural
  • 00:09:08
    Pathways which are the connections
  • 00:09:10
    within our brain that make your goals
  • 00:09:11
    feel more achievable and you go from
  • 00:09:14
    dreaming to acting every year there are
  • 00:09:18
    two activities I do without fail that
  • 00:09:20
    help me tap into the visual cortex of my
  • 00:09:23
    brain firstly is the perfect day
  • 00:09:25
    exercise this is basically where every
  • 00:09:27
    single year I write out my perfect day
  • 00:09:32
    one year from now and I always get into
  • 00:09:34
    the nitty-gritty specifics of the day
  • 00:09:38
    where I wake up what does the room look
  • 00:09:40
    like what does it smell like what do I
  • 00:09:42
    eat for breakfast what can I see what
  • 00:09:44
    can I feel what are the thoughts going
  • 00:09:47
    through my head everything and then with
  • 00:09:49
    this Clarity I've got from the perfect
  • 00:09:51
    day exercise I then move on to create a
  • 00:09:55
    vision board I'm sure you've heard of
  • 00:09:57
    vision boards before but here's the
  • 00:09:58
    catch generic vision boards do not
  • 00:10:05
    work you need Neuroscience packed
  • 00:10:08
    specificity to make a vision board that
  • 00:10:10
    truly shapes the direction of your
  • 00:10:13
    future if you're clueless about where to
  • 00:10:14
    start like I was I used the skillshare
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    class inspiration to reality making a
  • 00:10:20
    vision board for your goals to hack my
  • 00:10:22
    brain to become laser focused on my
  • 00:10:24
    goals skillshare is my secret weapon for
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    turning goals into a reality skillshare
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    is the largest online learning community
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  • 00:10:46
    your vision board more than just
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    Pinterest Aesthetics how to actually
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    turn it into a blueprint for success and
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    because skillshare are kindly sponsoring
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    your future self will thank you hit
  • 00:11:14
    number five the energy audit if there's
  • 00:11:17
    one thing about top 1% women is that
  • 00:11:20
    they don't just let life pass them by
  • 00:11:24
    they regularly reflect but even more
  • 00:11:27
    than that they get scientific evaluate
  • 00:11:29
    what they eat what they read what they
  • 00:11:32
    watch what they listen to and who they
  • 00:11:34
    spend time with it's this ongoing
  • 00:11:36
    process of refinement a way to optimize
  • 00:11:39
    every single aspect of their life and if
  • 00:11:41
    that sounds horrifically controlling and
  • 00:11:45
    terrifying to you then I'll tell you
  • 00:11:47
    something that I found way more
  • 00:11:51
    terrifying last year I spent four months
  • 00:11:53
    working as a doctor in pallative care I
  • 00:11:56
    saw way too many people who had their
  • 00:12:00
    lives cut short way too young it
  • 00:12:02
    completely changed my perspective on my
  • 00:12:04
    own life and for some people it might
  • 00:12:07
    have pushed them towards having a bit
  • 00:12:10
    more of a attitude I'm going to be dead
  • 00:12:13
    anyway drinking more going out more
  • 00:12:16
    doing more Reckless things quitting my
  • 00:12:18
    job and traveling but it actually had
  • 00:12:20
    the opposite effect for me I realized
  • 00:12:23
    how precious life is and I didn't want
  • 00:12:26
    to waste time doing anything I didn't
  • 00:12:29
    want to do or giving energy to anyone
  • 00:12:32
    that I didn't want to give energy to so
  • 00:12:34
    yes wanting to refine every single
  • 00:12:37
    aspect of my life is probably a little
  • 00:12:39
    bit scary but it is not as scary as
  • 00:12:42
    dying in your 30s and having so many
  • 00:12:46
    regrets everything that we consume
  • 00:12:48
    affects our energy and our experiences
  • 00:12:51
    research by the National Institute of
  • 00:12:53
    Mental Health shows that brains are
  • 00:12:55
    highly malleable which means that they
  • 00:12:58
    can be shaped a phenomenon known as
  • 00:13:02
    neuroplasticity so when you expose your
  • 00:13:04
    brain to that negative person in your
  • 00:13:07
    life who always makes you feel worse or
  • 00:13:09
    scrolling endlessly through social media
  • 00:13:12
    that makes you feel bad you are
  • 00:13:13
    literally shaping your brain studies
  • 00:13:16
    reveal that regular exposure to negative
  • 00:13:18
    stimuli can increase levels of cortisol
  • 00:13:21
    the stress hormone in the body leading
  • 00:13:23
    to a Perpetual state of fight or flight
  • 00:13:26
    this chronic state of stress can impair
  • 00:13:28
    your focus Focus slow down your
  • 00:13:30
    cognitive function and even negatively
  • 00:13:32
    affect your physical health on the other
  • 00:13:35
    hand intentional mindful consumption
  • 00:13:37
    through a balanced diet meant to fuel
  • 00:13:40
    you reading uplifting material and
  • 00:13:42
    listening to enlightening podcasts or my
  • 00:13:45
    personal favorite just spending time
  • 00:13:47
    with positive people rewires your brain
  • 00:13:50
    for Focus optimism and emotional
  • 00:13:53
    resilience am I saying you need to cut
  • 00:13:55
    everything negative out of your life
  • 00:13:57
    tomorrow no negativity is also part of
  • 00:14:01
    the human experience and it's a natural
  • 00:14:04
    emotion however as a top one% woman you
  • 00:14:08
    are regularly going to conduct a energy
  • 00:14:11
    audit to make sure that at least 80 to
  • 00:14:14
    90% of your life is filling your brain
  • 00:14:17
    with the good stuff habit number six
  • 00:14:20
    social currency you've probably heard
  • 00:14:22
    the saying your network is your net
  • 00:14:24
    worth but when it comes to high
  • 00:14:26
    achieving women the concept runs deeper
  • 00:14:30
    than just collecting contacts but I know
  • 00:14:33
    what you're going to say F I am
  • 00:14:35
    ridiculously busy I barely have enough
  • 00:14:38
    time for the people I love in my life at
  • 00:14:42
    the moment how on Earth am I going to
  • 00:14:44
    pull time out of thin air to develop
  • 00:14:47
    close meaningful connections with the
  • 00:14:49
    people who can open doors for me well
  • 00:14:52
    the answer might actually be easier than
  • 00:14:55
    you think a study from Harvard found
  • 00:14:58
    that close connection like family
  • 00:15:00
    friends and longtime colleagues account
  • 00:15:02
    for only 16% of New Opportunities the
  • 00:15:06
    other
  • 00:15:07
    84% they all come from weak ties these
  • 00:15:11
    are the acquaintances that you may not
  • 00:15:13
    interact with on a regular basis but you
  • 00:15:16
    may be significantly overlooking the
  • 00:15:19
    reason weak ties are so powerful is that
  • 00:15:22
    they expose you to new ideas a 2020
  • 00:15:26
    study found that those with a broader
  • 00:15:28
    and more first Network especially in
  • 00:15:31
    weaker connections are more likely to
  • 00:15:33
    find job opportunities entrepreneurial
  • 00:15:35
    Ventures and creative collaborations in
  • 00:15:39
    fact researchers found that weak ties
  • 00:15:41
    often provide access to information that
  • 00:15:44
    close ties simply cannot offer since
  • 00:15:46
    closed circles tend to share similar
  • 00:15:48
    information perspectives and resources I
  • 00:15:51
    used to get so stressed out whenever I
  • 00:15:53
    went to a networking event because I
  • 00:15:55
    felt as though I had to become best
  • 00:15:58
    friends with everyone and I do not have
  • 00:16:01
    the emotional capacity for that then
  • 00:16:03
    networking events became overwhelming
  • 00:16:05
    and I shied away from them and I just
  • 00:16:07
    felt as though it wasn't for me and D
  • 00:16:10
    but this perspective completely changed
  • 00:16:13
    that building social currency doesn't
  • 00:16:15
    mean that you have to be best friends
  • 00:16:17
    with everyone it means engaging and
  • 00:16:19
    being open with the people who have the
  • 00:16:22
    potential to help you evolve even if
  • 00:16:24
    they're not the people that you interact
  • 00:16:25
    with most and if you are still feeling a
  • 00:16:28
    little bit anxious I at any sort of
  • 00:16:30
    networking event remember this your
  • 00:16:33
    future self is already in the right room
  • 00:16:35
    with the right people you just haven't
  • 00:16:37
    met them yet finally habit 7 I know I
  • 00:16:39
    said habit one was probably the most
  • 00:16:41
    important but I actually think this one
  • 00:16:43
    is we need to talk about the bounce back
  • 00:16:46
    code if I ever failed in the past I
  • 00:16:49
    always used to take that as a sign that
  • 00:16:51
    it wasn't cut out for me so for example
  • 00:16:54
    if I gave up on a New Year's resolution
  • 00:16:57
    to go to the gym every morning
  • 00:16:59
    I wasn't sporty if I failed an exam when
  • 00:17:02
    I was trying to get into medical school
  • 00:17:05
    I wasn't smart enough or if I made a
  • 00:17:07
    video on YouTube and it kind of flopped
  • 00:17:10
    my YouTube career was over it was time
  • 00:17:12
    to turn off the camera and go back to my
  • 00:17:14
    normal job until probably the most
  • 00:17:16
    important realization of my adult life
  • 00:17:19
    I'm going to say this once and I'm going
  • 00:17:22
    to need you to listen really really
  • 00:17:24
    really hard high Achievers know that
  • 00:17:26
    failure is not an end point is just a
  • 00:17:29
    step forward on their path for Success
  • 00:17:32
    every single time we fail we have
  • 00:17:35
    another data point why didn't I stick to
  • 00:17:38
    that New Year's resolution and what can
  • 00:17:39
    I learn from it why did I fail on that
  • 00:17:41
    exam and what can I learn from it why
  • 00:17:43
    did my YouTube video flop and what can I
  • 00:17:46
    learn from it unfortunately this
  • 00:17:48
    mentality isn't something we've born
  • 00:17:51
    with it's built according to the Journal
  • 00:17:53
    of Personality and Social Psychology
  • 00:17:56
    resilience AKA this ability to bounce
  • 00:17:59
    back is largely shaped by cognitive
  • 00:18:02
    reframing which is essentially how we
  • 00:18:05
    perceive the challenges that we Face
  • 00:18:07
    instead of seeing failure as a setback
  • 00:18:09
    resilient people see it as a learning
  • 00:18:12
    opportunity research from psychology
  • 00:18:14
    science found that individuals with
  • 00:18:16
    greater resilience had better emotional
  • 00:18:18
    regulation Greater Life satisfaction and
  • 00:18:21
    enhanced well-being resilient women
  • 00:18:24
    don't just recover they become stronger
  • 00:18:27
    now all these habits are one ful but do
  • 00:18:29
    you know how to build habits into your
  • 00:18:32
    daily life so that they actually stick
  • 00:18:35
    if not then you may want to watch this
  • 00:18:37
    video here or this video which has been
  • 00:18:40
    handpicked just for you based on exactly
  • 00:18:43
    what you're interested in and if you've
  • 00:18:45
    enjoyed this video then you may even
  • 00:18:46
    want to subscribe by clicking here so
  • 00:18:48
    that you never miss another one thank
  • 00:18:50
    you so so so much for watching I hope
  • 00:18:52
    you have a wonderful wonderful wonderful
  • 00:18:54
    week and I will see you in the next
  • 00:18:56
    video
Tags
  • self-development
  • financial empowerment
  • self-trust
  • energy audit
  • goal setting
  • resilience
  • networking
  • women empowerment
  • psychology
  • habits