This is the last video you'll need on quitting p*rn, ever...

00:13:11
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1MgQFcBRLLo

Résumé

TLDRThe video offers a guide to overcoming addiction by focusing on building a strong personal foundation and understanding one's motivations for quitting. Viewers are encouraged to create ambitious goals and align their daily habits with these objectives to ensure consistency and resilience. Acknowledging and categorizing the root causes of urges helps in managing them effectively, while shifting perspective on addiction aids in diminishing its grip. The speaker emphasizes that 95% of success relies on the strength of one's foundational reasons for change.

A retenir

  • 🔑 Build a strong foundation: Establish a solid reason for quitting the addiction. This is your foundation that holds everything else.
  • 🏗️ Strengthen your goals: Set ambitious and meaningful goals that make the consequences of the addiction unappealing.
  • 💪 Develop discipline: Create habits that align with your foundation and goals to maintain consistency.
  • 🌀 Understand urges: Identify the root causes of your urges and separate them into controllable and uncontrollable factors.
  • 🧠 Change your perspective: Reduce the power of urges by understanding that the addiction is merely a way to escape feelings.
  • 🏃‍♂️ Find alternative escapes: Use healthy activities like exercise or meditation as alternative ways to cope.
  • 📉 Learn from relapses: Acknowledge that a relapse is just one broken window, not the collapse of the entire house.
  • 💬 Put yourself under pressure: Tell others about your goals to create accountability and motivation.
  • 🔍 Observe thoughts: During strong urges, observe and meditate on thoughts rather than acting on them.
  • ✨ Focus on the foundation: Spend 95% of your effort strengthening the underlying reasons for quitting.

Chronologie

  • 00:00:00 - 00:05:00

    The speaker promises that by following the advice given in the video, viewers can significantly reduce or end their addiction, particularly focusing on pornography. He uses the metaphor of building a house to represent the process of quitting an addiction, where relapse is akin to a house collapse. The essential step is constructing a strong 'foundation,' which is the individual's reason for quitting. He urges viewers to find a personal reason that resonates deeply, such as the desire to improve self-confidence or familial relationships. Building on this foundation requires setting ambitious and specific goals to strengthen the resolve to quit, such as aspiring to be a millionaire or improve personal relationships. This pressure helps in creating a commitment strong enough to resist relapse.

  • 00:05:00 - 00:13:11

    Following the establishment of a strong foundation, the speaker describes how daily actions and habits, akin to parts of a house, should be aligned with the foundation to prevent collapses or relapses. He advises on the importance of understanding triggers of urges and discerning whether they can be controlled. Acknowledging the inevitability of relapses, he suggests learning from them and differentiating between controllable and uncontrollable urges. The speaker encourages changing perspectives on addiction, particularly the excessive valuation of pornography as a source of escape. Instead, he advises adopting healthier habits and perspectives to fulfill the need for escape in alignment with personal goals. By reducing the perceived value of addictive behaviors and reinforcing other positive habits, one can mitigate urges effectively. The speaker emphasizes focusing on the foundational reasons for quitting, stating it's the core of overcoming addiction, complemented by supporting psychological strategies.

Carte mentale

Vidéo Q&R

  • What is the main strategy for overcoming addiction according to the video?

    The main strategy is to build a strong foundation with clear reasons for quitting and setting ambitious goals to create a stable support system.

  • How should one deal with a relapse?

    Treat a relapse as a small setback, like a broken window in a house, and learn from it without allowing it to derail your progress.

  • What role do goals play in overcoming addiction?

    Goals serve as a motivation to quit by illustrating how the addiction hinders achieving them, thus strengthening the foundation against relapse.

  • How can changing one's perspective help reduce addiction urges?

    By recognizing addiction as a mere escape instead of actual enjoyment, the perceived value and power of the urges can be diminished.

  • Why is it important to identify controllable and uncontrollable urges?

    Understanding which urges can be controlled allows individuals to take proactive steps to change habits and behaviors related to those urges.

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  • 00:00:00
    my brother if you can just give me 10 15
  • 00:00:02
    20 minutes of your time I can guarantee
  • 00:00:05
    you this addiction by the end of this
  • 00:00:07
    video will be gone it it will be
  • 00:00:09
    vanished from your life or you'll be
  • 00:00:11
    doing it 10 times less than you normally
  • 00:00:13
    do and I can make that promise to you if
  • 00:00:16
    you just lock in do yourself a favor and
  • 00:00:18
    just implement the things I'm going to
  • 00:00:20
    tell you this applies to everybody it
  • 00:00:22
    doesn't matter if you do this once every
  • 00:00:24
    30 days once a day three or four times a
  • 00:00:26
    day it doesn't matter okay this applies
  • 00:00:28
    to everybody and as you can see we're
  • 00:00:31
    going to be using a house to represent
  • 00:00:34
    this when your house collapses that is
  • 00:00:37
    an equivalent of relapse so our goal
  • 00:00:41
    today is to ensure that this house does
  • 00:00:44
    not collapse due to wind hurricanes
  • 00:00:47
    floods natural disasters I'm going to
  • 00:00:49
    explain to you how you can quit this
  • 00:00:51
    stuff like you're a 5-year-old okay
  • 00:00:53
    let's get sh into it I'm not here to
  • 00:00:54
    waste your time my camera is on like 10%
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    we need to do this quick now
  • 00:01:00
    most of you have just built this house
  • 00:01:03
    there's nothing to hold it up the first
  • 00:01:06
    thing that you need when you're building
  • 00:01:08
    a strong house that's not going to get
  • 00:01:10
    affected by external things such as wind
  • 00:01:13
    you need to build a
  • 00:01:15
    foundation some of you already have this
  • 00:01:19
    Foundation I will get to you in a minute
  • 00:01:22
    let's start with the boys who are new to
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    this you need to build this Foundation
  • 00:01:27
    now what is a foundation in real life a
  • 00:01:30
    Foundation is your reason for quitting
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    the reason why you want to quit watching
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    porn I want you to ask yourself right
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    now why did I click on this video yeah
  • 00:01:40
    why do I want to quit watching porn how
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    is this affecting my life you need this
  • 00:01:46
    okay you need this reason if you don't
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    have it click off this video and go and
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    do some journaling yeah once you have
  • 00:01:55
    this reason let's say that this is
  • 00:01:56
    affecting your confidence with women
  • 00:01:59
    right you need to ask yourself how will
  • 00:02:02
    no confidence with women affect my life
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    negatively if you have no confidence to
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    go out there and talk to girls you may
  • 00:02:09
    never find your dream wife if you never
  • 00:02:12
    find your dream wife you'll never be
  • 00:02:13
    able to start your own family you never
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    be able to have a kid yeah imagine the
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    pain of that that pain is so much
  • 00:02:20
    scarier than being absent from porn you
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    need to find this pain and need to you
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    know replace the pleasure of 2 or 3
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    seconds of busting a nut with a lifelong
  • 00:02:33
    pleasure of starting a family that might
  • 00:02:35
    be a reason for you quitting another
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    reason might be making money it doesn't
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    matter find your reason now once you
  • 00:02:43
    have your reason most of you I would say
  • 00:02:46
    most of you watching this video have
  • 00:02:48
    your foundation you have your goal you
  • 00:02:50
    have your reason for quitting but it's
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    not strong
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    enough what you need to do is build a
  • 00:02:57
    foundation under the foundation or build
  • 00:03:00
    a foundation on the
  • 00:03:02
    foundation let's say you want to be you
  • 00:03:06
    have to set an ambitious goal the more
  • 00:03:08
    ambitious your goal the more porn's
  • 00:03:10
    probably going to affect actually
  • 00:03:12
    achieving that so the bigger your
  • 00:03:13
    foundation probably
  • 00:03:15
    is let's say you want to be a
  • 00:03:17
    millionaire in uh in 3 years time
  • 00:03:19
    millionaire 3 years time okay you have
  • 00:03:21
    your reason you want to retire your
  • 00:03:22
    parents you want to retire your family
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    you want to have location Freedom time
  • 00:03:25
    Freedom you want to do what you love
  • 00:03:26
    every single day these are all your
  • 00:03:28
    reasons okay and and porn is holding you
  • 00:03:31
    back from doing that because you keep
  • 00:03:33
    waking up late you have no social skills
  • 00:03:35
    you can't network with people you can't
  • 00:03:37
    put quality time into your business so
  • 00:03:39
    many reasons cuz you're distracted by
  • 00:03:41
    [ __ ] booty and ass I meant to say
  • 00:03:42
    boobs and ass but that's fine let's say
  • 00:03:45
    you want to be a millionaire in 3 years
  • 00:03:47
    time I'm not a big fan of this but what
  • 00:03:49
    you can do is just go and tell your
  • 00:03:51
    parents I'm going to retire you in 3
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    years go and tell your friends I'm going
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    to be a millionaire in 3 years time hear
  • 00:03:57
    them doubt you tell social media I'm
  • 00:03:59
    going to be a millionaire in 3 years
  • 00:04:01
    time you tell your parents boom you tell
  • 00:04:04
    your friends boom there is so much
  • 00:04:07
    pressure on you to not watch this [ __ ]
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    because it's holding you back from being
  • 00:04:12
    that person right you make this stronger
  • 00:04:16
    these are like your individual goals
  • 00:04:18
    yeah like to retire your family you've
  • 00:04:19
    told your parents you told your friends
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    you told social media you have to do
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    this now that is just an example okay
  • 00:04:26
    you might add to your foundation in a
  • 00:04:28
    different way does doesn't necessarily
  • 00:04:30
    mean telling people it doesn't mean
  • 00:04:32
    that find a way to make this stronger
  • 00:04:36
    put pressure on yourself you need a
  • 00:04:38
    little bit if you have been struggling
  • 00:04:40
    with this [ __ ] for years upon Years bro
  • 00:04:43
    it's not nothing changes if nothing
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    changes simple nothing changes if
  • 00:04:51
    nothing changes you need to add
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    something to this just experiment if it
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    doesn't work it doesn't work tell your
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    parents know you're going to be a
  • 00:05:00
    millionaire in 3 years and if you don't
  • 00:05:02
    like the idea tell them it's a joke
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    tomorrow just see okay these are just
  • 00:05:07
    examples though so you've got your
  • 00:05:09
    foundation that's all good you got that
  • 00:05:13
    now what's this these are the actions
  • 00:05:16
    you put in place every single day which
  • 00:05:19
    is stemmed from this so you need to
  • 00:05:22
    create this in before you create this so
  • 00:05:26
    many of you create this which is your
  • 00:05:28
    actions your habits
  • 00:05:30
    before you create this it doesn't work
  • 00:05:32
    if you don't have this you might stay
  • 00:05:34
    consistent for a day you might have a
  • 00:05:35
    really good day you might have a
  • 00:05:36
    productive day you wake up at 5:30 you
  • 00:05:39
    hit a workout you go on cold approaching
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    women you work in your business for a
  • 00:05:44
    couple of hours you study for a couple
  • 00:05:45
    of hours but you can't keep this up for
  • 00:05:47
    a couple of days you go 2 three days of
  • 00:05:49
    consistency and then you give up so the
  • 00:05:51
    best advice I can give you once you have
  • 00:05:53
    built your foundation build a house that
  • 00:05:57
    is directly related to to the foundation
  • 00:06:00
    it's not you know your foundation isn't
  • 00:06:03
    really small but then your house is
  • 00:06:04
    really big your foundation isn't very
  • 00:06:06
    big but then your house is really small
  • 00:06:08
    you want it to match okay if you want to
  • 00:06:11
    be a millionaire in 3 years time spend
  • 00:06:13
    more time trying to make money and your
  • 00:06:16
    second goal is to get a girlfriend spend
  • 00:06:18
    less time trying to get a girlfriend and
  • 00:06:20
    more time trying to make money that's
  • 00:06:22
    how you do it it needs to reflect what's
  • 00:06:24
    on the bottom yeah simple that's really
  • 00:06:28
    it that's really all you need here now
  • 00:06:33
    what most of you do when this wind comes
  • 00:06:37
    along tries to tries to you know [ __ ]
  • 00:06:40
    you up put you put you in a slump yeah
  • 00:06:43
    what you what most of you
  • 00:06:44
    do what I've done so many times it's
  • 00:06:47
    it's really normal you will have one
  • 00:06:49
    relapse you will relapse once and this
  • 00:06:54
    wind will take out one
  • 00:06:58
    window one window represents one relapse
  • 00:07:01
    okay and let's say like six or seven
  • 00:07:03
    relapses represents your whole
  • 00:07:06
    house uh collapsing okay just because a
  • 00:07:11
    window breaks doesn't mean you ruin your
  • 00:07:15
    whole progress just because you relapse
  • 00:07:17
    at 300 p.m. doesn't mean you relapse
  • 00:07:19
    three or four times a day that three or
  • 00:07:22
    four times that day and then you do it
  • 00:07:24
    tomorrow and you do it the next day and
  • 00:07:25
    you go the whole week being lazy no just
  • 00:07:28
    because one window cracks doesn't mean
  • 00:07:31
    you collapse your your whole house all
  • 00:07:33
    right you
  • 00:07:34
    learn why this
  • 00:07:37
    broke why did it break why did the wind
  • 00:07:41
    hit this instead of this why did the
  • 00:07:44
    wind hit this window instead of this
  • 00:07:45
    door you might have had an unproductive
  • 00:07:47
    day because of external circumstances
  • 00:07:49
    maybe your foundation was strong but
  • 00:07:52
    something else cause you to relapse
  • 00:07:55
    that's fine all you can do is learn from
  • 00:07:57
    it now you kind of have to you know
  • 00:08:02
    ignore the house concept for this one
  • 00:08:04
    let me stand in the middle you kind of
  • 00:08:06
    have to ignore the house concept for
  • 00:08:08
    this but when you do encounter an urge
  • 00:08:11
    yeah you have a gust of wind you have a
  • 00:08:13
    hurricane what however strong the urge
  • 00:08:14
    is a hurricane is a really strong urge
  • 00:08:17
    look if your house is built strong
  • 00:08:20
    enough you're fine but once you
  • 00:08:22
    encounter this I want you to observe the
  • 00:08:25
    wind I want you to observe the disaster
  • 00:08:27
    that's about to collapse your house okay
  • 00:08:29
    can you control this this is where the
  • 00:08:31
    house example doesn't really matter it
  • 00:08:33
    doesn't really you know a line can you
  • 00:08:37
    control the root cause of the urge okay
  • 00:08:41
    you might get an urge because your
  • 00:08:44
    family are having problems and you're
  • 00:08:45
    stuck in your room all day you don't
  • 00:08:47
    even want to go out yeah because your
  • 00:08:49
    family is constantly fighting you can't
  • 00:08:51
    necessarily control that something you
  • 00:08:53
    can control is you waking up at 7:00
  • 00:08:55
    a.m. instead of 5:00 a.m. like you said
  • 00:08:58
    that's something you can can control so
  • 00:09:00
    I want you to separate your urges what's
  • 00:09:03
    causing the urges can you control them
  • 00:09:06
    can I not control them something you
  • 00:09:07
    cannot control is just urges out of
  • 00:09:09
    nowhere they just pop pop up in your
  • 00:09:11
    mind you know that your favorite videos
  • 00:09:13
    that just pop up in your mind and you
  • 00:09:15
    want to go and do it you want to go and
  • 00:09:16
    watch them if you can control it change
  • 00:09:18
    it
  • 00:09:20
    simple change it do something about a b
  • 00:09:23
    it's the best advice I can give you if
  • 00:09:25
    you can't control it I know it sounds
  • 00:09:28
    really selfish and just really like you
  • 00:09:30
    know just [ __ ] but it's true you need to
  • 00:09:35
    learn to live with it you need to learn
  • 00:09:37
    to cope with it I know it's really bad
  • 00:09:40
    especially if you're on a in a dark
  • 00:09:41
    space I know bro I've been through it
  • 00:09:44
    all right I've been through it not
  • 00:09:46
    probably what some of you guys have been
  • 00:09:48
    through but I've definitely had urges
  • 00:09:50
    that have come from just a dark place in
  • 00:09:52
    my life I know what it's like bro
  • 00:09:54
    but you need to have this house built
  • 00:09:59
    and you need to transmute this energy
  • 00:10:01
    that you're getting this you know this
  • 00:10:02
    dark feeling this depression this
  • 00:10:05
    sadness whatever it is and you need to
  • 00:10:07
    try your best to creating a better house
  • 00:10:11
    bro that's what you need that's what you
  • 00:10:12
    need to do all right you've got your
  • 00:10:14
    foundation you've got your goals I hope
  • 00:10:16
    this makes sense I'm trying to explain
  • 00:10:17
    this as simple as I can for you okay now
  • 00:10:20
    my camera is on 3% so we have to hurry
  • 00:10:23
    up last thing I want to tell you that is
  • 00:10:26
    very very important and it applies to
  • 00:10:28
    this
  • 00:10:29
    and
  • 00:10:31
    this your urges one of the reason your
  • 00:10:34
    urges is so strong is because you is
  • 00:10:37
    because you put so much pedestal on porn
  • 00:10:39
    you put it up here even though it's not
  • 00:10:42
    even that good it's not even enjoyable
  • 00:10:44
    are you smiling while you're jacking off
  • 00:10:46
    are you smiling while you're busting a
  • 00:10:49
    nut are you smiling while you're
  • 00:10:50
    watching two people do it no you're not
  • 00:10:53
    okay you know you don't actually enjoy
  • 00:10:55
    it it is just a perfect way to escape
  • 00:10:58
    how your feel
  • 00:10:59
    feeling that's it it's a perfect way for
  • 00:11:03
    90% of people it is a perfect way to
  • 00:11:06
    escape what you're feeling okay so I
  • 00:11:11
    want you to change your perspective on
  • 00:11:14
    this stuff it's not actually enjoyable
  • 00:11:17
    when you go and do it you're not
  • 00:11:18
    actually having a good time you're just
  • 00:11:20
    escaping from whatever you're feeling
  • 00:11:22
    and it's a perfect way to forget about
  • 00:11:24
    everything you're not thinking about
  • 00:11:25
    anything else while you're watching that
  • 00:11:27
    stuff are you but if you go for a run
  • 00:11:30
    which is which is another term of you
  • 00:11:31
    know escaping from your thoughts your
  • 00:11:34
    thoughts are still there okay so look at
  • 00:11:38
    porn as just that a source of Escape how
  • 00:11:43
    can we escape a different way exercise
  • 00:11:46
    is a perfect example but a perfect
  • 00:11:49
    example is
  • 00:11:51
    habits that align with your foundation
  • 00:11:55
    align with your goals these are perfect
  • 00:11:58
    ways to escape these thoughts or what
  • 00:12:03
    you can do is you can observe these
  • 00:12:05
    thoughts you can dive into a meditation
  • 00:12:08
    okay really observe them I can't go
  • 00:12:10
    deeper than this cuz my camera is about
  • 00:12:12
    to die but you get my point you can
  • 00:12:14
    reduce the power of these urges by
  • 00:12:17
    simply changing your perspective on corn
  • 00:12:19
    BR it's a dark industry it's not good
  • 00:12:22
    okay and you're just feeding that every
  • 00:12:24
    time you watch it you're only making it
  • 00:12:26
    more popular I know some of you are
  • 00:12:28
    Christian and you're you know your main
  • 00:12:29
    motivator to not watch that stuff is
  • 00:12:31
    because of the sin perfect bro how does
  • 00:12:34
    not sinning affect your life positively
  • 00:12:36
    you probably already know you need to go
  • 00:12:38
    deep into this as I said here this is
  • 00:12:42
    95% of this video all this [ __ ] comes
  • 00:12:45
    with it if this is strong so Focus 95%
  • 00:12:50
    of your attention here that's how I quit
  • 00:12:52
    that's how I went from watching it three
  • 00:12:54
    or four times a day to going over a
  • 00:12:55
    th000 days without the stuff okay of
  • 00:12:57
    course there little psychological tricks
  • 00:12:59
    you can do there's science behind
  • 00:13:01
    certain things but this is 95% of what
  • 00:13:04
    you need to know all right much love
  • 00:13:06
    brother go there and crush it and I'll
  • 00:13:08
    catch you in the next one peace
Tags
  • addiction
  • relapse
  • foundation
  • motivation
  • goals
  • self-improvement
  • mindset
  • control
  • urges
  • change