00:00:00
Translator: Cihan Ekmekçi
Reviewer: Leonardo Silva
00:00:06
Six years ago, I was sitting out
with some friends in New York City
00:00:10
when I got a notification on my phone,
00:00:13
and I was surprised to find that I had
a text message from my grandmother.
00:00:18
I was surprised because my grandmother
at the time was 78 years old,
00:00:22
and she had never sent a text before.
00:00:24
And I will tell you
the first text was adorable.
00:00:27
It read, "Dear Andrew,
trying out texting. Love, your grandma."
00:00:34
I was like "Aw, she thinks it's a letter!"
00:00:38
So I sent her a message back,
00:00:39
"Hey grandma, it's a text.
You don't have to include all that."
00:00:42
Her response was "Dear Andrew,
00:00:44
Okay. Love, your grandma."
00:00:47
My favorite part is it's always
"Love, your grandma,"
00:00:50
like if it was "Love, grandma"
I'd be confused.
00:00:52
If it was like, "Dear Andrew,
have a good time in Texas. Love, grandma,"
00:00:56
I'd be like "Grandma? Who's grandma?"
00:00:58
(Laughter)
00:00:59
But my grandmother's still
figuring some things out.
00:01:02
A couple of years ago,
I went to Switzerland for work,
00:01:04
came back, sent a message to grandmother:
00:01:06
''Hey grandma, just got back
from Switzerland.''
00:01:09
Her response was, ''Dear Andrew,
Switzerland? WTF.''
00:01:13
(Laughter)
00:01:16
All right, so I called my grandmother up,
00:01:18
''Grandma, what do you think WTF means?''
00:01:21
And she's like,
00:01:22
''Oh well, someone at Bridge told me
it means 'Wow That's Fun.''
00:01:25
(Laughter)
00:01:27
I was like, ''That is exactly
what it means.''
00:01:29
I'm not going to explain that
to my grandmother.
00:01:32
But over time, I've come to realize
00:01:33
that I think the world
would be a happier place
00:01:36
if more people thought WTF -
00:01:38
if more people were like my grandmother
and thought, "Wow, that's fun."
00:01:41
Because in 2012, I left my corporate job
at Procter and Gamble
00:01:44
to teach people about the value of humor.
00:01:47
I've worked with more than 35,000 people
at more than 250 organizations
00:01:52
on how to be more productive,
less stressed and happier, using humor.
00:01:56
But when people hear what it is that I do,
they are a little bit skeptical,
00:02:00
(Laughter)
00:02:01
because no one thinks
of humor as a bad thing.
00:02:03
Is there anyone here
that doesn't like to laugh?
00:02:06
Anyone that's like
"No, I hate feeling joy in my body?"
00:02:09
(Laughter)
00:02:10
No. People think of humor
as a nice-to-have.
00:02:12
Oh, if I enjoyed my work more,
if I had some fun, it would be great,
00:02:16
but if not, oh well.
00:02:18
The reality is that humor is a must-have.
00:02:21
In today's overworked, underappreciated,
stress-filled, sleep-deprived culture,
00:02:26
humor is a necessity.
00:02:28
Because humor gets people to listen,
00:02:31
it increases long-term memory retention,
00:02:33
it improves understanding,
aids in learning
00:02:35
and helps communicate messages.
00:02:36
It also improves group cohesiveness,
00:02:38
reduces status differentials,
diffuses conflict, builds trust
00:02:42
and brings people closer together.
00:02:44
It does these things
00:02:45
(Laughter)
00:02:47
and this stuff and on and on and on ...
00:02:52
And it's all backed by research
case studies and real-world examples.
00:02:56
(Laughter)
00:02:58
And these are some
impressive benefits, right?
00:03:00
Humor can help you to look better,
live longer and make it rain, right?
00:03:06
(Laughter)
00:03:07
Because people who use humor
are paid more.
00:03:09
And anyone can learn these benefits.
00:03:13
Because when I talk to people
about humor or comedy,
00:03:15
sometimes they're intimidated.
00:03:17
That event that I went to
in Switzerland a couple years ago
00:03:20
that made my grandmother say WTF,
00:03:21
it was to speak at a conference.
00:03:23
And one of the other speakers
at that conference was this gentleman.
00:03:26
His name is Kevin Richardson.
00:03:28
He's also known as the lion whisperer.
00:03:30
If you've ever seen that YouTube video
of a lion hugging a dude, that's this guy.
00:03:34
He lives in South Africa,
00:03:35
he raises lions from
when they're really young,
00:03:37
and they treat him as one of the pride.
00:03:39
He's basically the human version
of Rafiki from The Lion King.
00:03:42
But Kevin and I were talking
before the event.
00:03:45
He found out that I did stand-up comedy,
00:03:46
and he was like ''Huh, I could
never do that, it's too scary.''
00:03:51
(Laughter)
00:03:52
I was like ''But you live with lions!''
00:03:54
(Laughter)
00:03:56
As if telling a joke is somehow
scarier than living with lions.
00:04:00
(Laughter)
00:04:01
But so many people have this perception
00:04:03
as if the ability to make people laugh
is somehow encoded in our DNA.
00:04:08
(Laughter)
00:04:09
But the reality is that humor is a skill,
00:04:12
and if it's a skill,
that means we can learn it.
00:04:14
Because I am someone
who has had to learn how to use humor.
00:04:17
Because I've done over a thousand shows
00:04:19
as a stand-up comedian, improviser,
storyteller, spoken word artist.
00:04:23
I've spoken and performed in all 50 states
in 18 countries and on one planet.
00:04:28
(Laughter)
00:04:30
I have fans in more than 150 countries,
00:04:32
based on people who have
accidentally come to my website.
00:04:35
I've been called hilarious and smart,
at least that's what my mom says.
00:04:38
(Laughter)
00:04:39
And I've been seen on The Daily Show
with John Stewart, in the audience.
00:04:43
(Laughter)
00:04:45
I recently went to my
high school reunion though,
00:04:47
and when people found out
that I did stand-up comedy,
00:04:49
they said, ''But you're not funny.''
00:04:52
And in some ways they're right
00:04:53
because I would tell you
that this is not the face of funny.
00:04:57
(Laughter)
00:04:58
There's a lot that's funny
about this picture;
00:05:01
none of it is intentional.
00:05:03
(Laughter)
00:05:04
And I have the blonde tips up top
like I wanted to be in a boy band.
00:05:07
The theme was ''Into a Dream,''
I am no one's dream -
00:05:10
(Laughter)
00:05:11
in this picture.
00:05:12
Because, growing up, I was never
the life of the party or the class clown.
00:05:16
My senior year - my senior superlative,
I was voted teacher's pet.
00:05:19
And this is going to surprise many of you,
but it's because I am a nerd.
00:05:23
And if you're wondering
what type of nerd,
00:05:25
the answer is yes;
computer, math, sci-fi,
00:05:29
Dungeons & Dragons, Star Wars,
Star Trek, Starbucks - all of them.
00:05:33
(Laughter)
00:05:34
But most specifically, I'm an engineer.
00:05:36
I went to the Ohio State University,
00:05:38
got a degree in computer
science and engineering.
00:05:40
And after I graduated,
00:05:41
I started working at Procter & Gamble
as an IT project manager.
00:05:44
And that's what people expected me to do,
00:05:47
because based on my
personality assessment,
00:05:49
that's what it suggests I should be
as a computer science engineer.
00:05:54
But I've learned that we're not
a personality assessment.
00:05:56
Because my assessment is
00:05:58
I'm a Type-A, blue square, conscientious,
INTJ with the sign of Aquarius.
00:06:03
That means I'm an ambitious,
stubborn introvert
00:06:06
who likes long walks on the beach,
00:06:08
but I've learned we're not
our personality assessments.
00:06:10
They might give us insight
into our behavior
00:06:12
or tell us what motivates us
00:06:14
or tell us which Disney Princess
we would be - Pocahontas -
00:06:16
(Laughter)
00:06:17
but they don't define us;
instead, we are defined by our actions.
00:06:22
So I started doing comedy in college.
00:06:24
My best friend there in the middle
wanted to start an improv comedy group.
00:06:27
He needed people and forced me to join.
00:06:29
And as you can probably tell
from this picture, we were not very good.
00:06:33
At least to start out,
we had no idea what we were doing.
00:06:36
We watched "Whose Line Is It Anyway?"
and tried to repeat what we saw.
00:06:40
And what I didn't have in comedy skill
I made up in comedy project management.
00:06:44
"If we're going to do this for real;
00:06:46
we'll practice three times a week,
00:06:47
we'll have a business
meeting every Monday,
00:06:50
and we're going to go back and watch
our shows as if it was game tape.''
00:06:53
And over the course
of two years, we got better.
00:06:56
We went from performing
in the basements of residence halls
00:06:59
to performing twice a week
at a theater on campus,
00:07:01
never really learning
how to take a good picture.
00:07:04
But that's how you learn
the skill of humor.
00:07:06
It's through practice and repetition.
00:07:09
And anyone can do these things.
00:07:11
And you don't have to become
a professional comedian to use comedy,
00:07:14
but we can learn from the professionals.
00:07:17
For example, from stand-up, we can learn
about how to share your point of view,
00:07:20
because Louis C.K. has
a very specific way of seeing the world,
00:07:23
which is different than Ellen DeGeneres,
00:07:25
which is different than Tig Notaro,
Dave Chappelle or Chris Rock.
00:07:29
Everyone has their own perspective.
00:07:31
Some people tell me
00:07:32
that I kind of look like the intersection
of Hugh Jackman and Conan O'Brien.
00:07:36
(Laughter)
00:07:39
Other people are like, "Ah, I kind of see
David Tennant from Doctor Who."
00:07:43
One woman told me,
00:07:44
''I think you look like Justin Timberlake
but from here to here.''
00:07:47
(Laughter)
00:07:50
And we're going to ignore the guy
that told me I look like Clay Aiken.
00:07:54
Right, just completely.
00:07:55
Everyone has their own perspective.
00:07:58
And we can use that perspective as a way
to connect with other people, right?
00:08:02
We can use it to say, ''Oh, we're alike.''
How many people here like desert?
00:08:06
People love desert. I love deserts.
I am obsessed with milkshake.
00:08:09
So it's the most efficient form of desert
00:08:12
because of the deliciousness of ice cream
in an easy-to-consume form.
00:08:16
But I don't understand mint chocolate.
00:08:18
I don't know if we have
any mint chocolate fan.
00:08:20
I've never been eating chocolate
00:08:22
and been like, ''You know what would
go great with this? Toothpaste."
00:08:25
(Laughter)
00:08:26
We can share a perspective
as a way to connect.
00:08:29
We can also share a perspective
as a way to make a point.
00:08:32
Because I will tell you
00:08:33
that I have always understood computers
much more than I understand humans.
00:08:38
Because when something goes wrong
with the computer,
00:08:41
you get an error message.
00:08:42
When something goes wrong with a human,
00:08:44
you get feelings.
00:08:45
(Laughter)
00:08:46
Things would be so much easier
if humans came with error messages,
00:08:49
wouldn't they?
00:08:50
Say you're overworked, overwhelmed,
a little bit stressed out,
00:08:53
it would just pop up:
"Warning! System overload."
00:08:55
(Laughter)
00:08:56
"Please restart by taking a nap."
00:08:59
Because we all know
naps are the human version
00:09:01
of, "Just turn it off
and then turn it back on again."
00:09:04
Some error messages
you wouldn't even have to change.
00:09:06
Say, you're out flirting with a waitress,
she's not really feeling it.
00:09:09
It would just pop up: "Error.
Unable to establish connection to server."
00:09:13
(Laughter)
00:09:16
Things would be so much easier.
00:09:18
But the reality is that humans
aren't computers,
00:09:21
no matter how adorable they are
when they pretend to be.
00:09:24
Because we, as humans, not only have
to manage time, we have to manage energy.
00:09:28
Because it doesn't matter
how much time we have
00:09:30
if we've never have the energy
to do anything with it.
00:09:33
From improv, we can learn how we can
explore and heighten a point of view.
00:09:37
Because the fundamental
mindset of improvisation is "Yes, and..."
00:09:40
It's how improvisers at UCB, Second City
and ComedySportz make things up
00:09:44
off the top of their head.
00:09:46
And we can use that same thing,
00:09:47
take what they do, accept and build,
explore and heighten and say,
00:09:50
''If this is true, what else is true?''
00:09:53
Because it took me going
to the state of Florida to realize
00:09:56
that the rapper Flo Rida got his name
from his home state of Florida,
00:10:03
and he put a space in it.
00:10:05
That blew my mind!
00:10:07
(Laughter)
00:10:08
We could say, ''If this is true,
what else could be true?''
00:10:11
We could say,
00:10:12
"I think there should be
a Hispanic factory in Dover
00:10:15
that goes by De La Ware."
00:10:17
(Laughter)
00:10:18
Or like, "There could be a female
internet detective in Biloxi
00:10:21
who goes by Misses IP, PI."
00:10:24
(Laughter)
00:10:26
And if this is true, what else is true?
00:10:28
If we can use ''Yes, and''
to create humor,
00:10:30
we can also use ''Yes, and'' as a way
to connect with other people.
00:10:34
We can think of that stereotypical
small talk conversation
00:10:36
where people are like,
''Ah, how about this weather?''
00:10:39
You say, "Yes, and if you were not
at this event right now,
00:10:42
how would you be out
enjoying the weather?"
00:10:44
And we can turn an awkward conversation
into something more meaningful
00:10:47
where you learn about the person.
00:10:49
''With beautiful weather, I go outside,
or I go hiking or swimming.''
00:10:52
If you're me, you stay inside,
because you're very pale.
00:10:55
I like to use SPF building;
its the best protection.
00:10:59
We learn about people
through ''Yes, and.''
00:11:02
We can also use a yes-and mindset
to have more fun,
00:11:05
because the reality is that the average
person works 90 thousand hours
00:11:09
in their lifetime.
00:11:10
Ninety thousand hours!
00:11:12
That's the entire length,
the entire discography of Netflix.
00:11:16
That is a lot of time.
00:11:18
And we can say, ''Yes, I'm going
to work 90 thousand hours,
00:11:21
and I might as well enjoy it.''
00:11:24
Between my junior
and senior year of high school,
00:11:26
I worked in a factory,
00:11:27
and I will tell you
what was not a very exciting job.
00:11:30
And at the time, I thought
that I might, in the future,
00:11:32
want to become an international
hip-hop superstar.
00:11:36
So, to pass the time,
I would think of rhymes in my head,
00:11:38
then I'd write them down
in a notebook a little bit later.
00:11:41
And I recently found
one of those notebooks
00:11:43
and discovered why I never became
a hip-hop superstar.
00:11:46
Because one of the rhymes was,
00:11:47
"Hydrogen plus hydrogen plus oxygen too,
bonded together with covalent glue.
00:11:53
What do you get,
just a thing called water,
00:11:55
yeah, it's teaming up
and it's only getting hotter."
00:11:58
(Laughter)
00:12:00
It's the reason why I never became
a hip-hop superstar.
00:12:04
But it still helped me to pass the time
to create humor, to create fun.
00:12:10
And finally from sketch,
00:12:11
we can learn about the importance
of commitment to performance.
00:12:14
Because the characters
from Saturday Night Live,
00:12:16
Key & Peele, Monty Python,
00:12:18
they're so enjoyable, because the actors
are committed to the performance.
00:12:21
And they're confident
in their presentation,
00:12:23
because it's like dating, right?
00:12:25
People tell you that they want
to date someone who is confident.
00:12:28
A couple years ago,
I was with some friends at a bar,
00:12:31
and I saw this beautiful girl at the bar.
00:12:33
''You should go talk to her.''
00:12:35
''I can't do that.''
00:12:36
''Why not?''
00:12:37
''I don't have 'game.'''
00:12:39
''You don't need 'game,'
you just need confidence.''
00:12:42
But they don't tell you that they want
that confidence in certain areas.
00:12:45
Because no woman wants a man
who's confident in math.
00:12:49
(Laughter)
00:12:50
That's what I've got.
00:12:51
(Laughter)
00:12:52
So I was like, ''All right.
I'm going to try a math pickup line.''
00:12:56
So I went up to the girl
and I was like, ''Hey, girl."
00:12:58
(Laughter)
00:12:59
"Are you a vertical asymptote?
Because your beauty has no limits.''
00:13:03
(Laughter)
00:13:04
She was like, ''What did you just say?''
00:13:06
(Laughter)
00:13:07
So I tried again,
and I was like, ''Hey, girl.
00:13:10
Are you opposite over hypotenuse?
Because you're making me want to sin.''
00:13:13
(Laughter)
00:13:17
She was like, ''I think
you should probably leave.''
00:13:19
So I left, right?
00:13:21
But then a few hours later, I was like,
"Oh, what I should've said was,
00:13:24
'Hey girl, you're way
above average, don't be mean.'''
00:13:28
(Laughter)
00:13:30
Has that ever happened to you,
00:13:31
where you thought of something
like four hours after the event?
00:13:34
That's actually a good thing,
it's called staircase wit.
00:13:37
The idea of ''this moment happens here,''
00:13:39
and then you think of this idea
in the staircase.
00:13:41
That's a good sign, because that means
you have comedic instinct.
00:13:44
And through practice and repetition,
00:13:46
you can shorten the time
it takes to have that a-ha moment
00:13:49
from being four hours later
to only three hours later,
00:13:51
to only two to ten minutes
to, then, happening in the moment.
00:13:54
Because a reflection on the past
leads to action in the future.
00:13:59
And so we become more comfortable,
more confident using humor,
00:14:02
the more that we actually do it.
00:14:04
It's like Amy Cuddy says:
''Fake it until you become it.''
00:14:07
I know there's a couple of people
00:14:09
that are like, ''All right,
Justin Timberlake eyes.''
00:14:11
(Laughter)
00:14:12
''What if I'm not funny?''
00:14:14
The truth is if you have ever
made someone laugh,
00:14:16
even if it's because you tripped
up the steps while going up the steps,
00:14:21
you would still use humor.
00:14:23
But even if you're not ready
to try creating humor,
00:14:25
you can still benefit from humor
by being a shepherd of humor.
00:14:29
You can share quotations out,
you can share a TED talk that you enjoyed,
00:14:33
or you can use images
in your presentations.
00:14:36
Because I did not take this picture.
00:14:38
I did not go to Sri Lanka.
00:14:39
I do not know this shepherd
or any of these goats.
00:14:43
I found it on Flickr
under a Creative Commons license
00:14:45
and shared it with all of you,
because I enjoyed it.
00:14:48
But even if you're not
ready to create humor,
00:14:50
and you don't think that you can find
something interesting on the Internet,
00:14:54
you can still use humor
if you know how to smile.
00:14:56
Because when we see someone else smile,
00:14:58
we are primed to mirror that behavior
with mirror neurons in our brain.
00:15:02
And when we smile, they smile:
we create a human connection.
00:15:06
Other people are like,
''But what if no one laughs?
00:15:08
What if I try humor,
and there's an awkward silence?''
00:15:11
Well, it's really only awkward
if you spend time on it,
00:15:13
if you dwell on it.
00:15:15
And the reality is that no one has ever
been fired because of a bad joke.
00:15:19
An inappropriate one, maybe,
but not a bad joke.
00:15:22
Because a bad joke is something like,
00:15:24
"I once had to miss class
because of hypothermia,
00:15:26
I was too cool for school."
00:15:28
(Laughter)
00:15:29
That's a bad joke.
00:15:31
(Laughter)
00:15:32
An inappropriate joke is one
that has an inappropriate subject,
00:15:36
has an inappropriate target
or comes at an inappropriate time.
00:15:40
But as long as we are positive -
00:15:42
(Laughter)
00:15:44
and inclusive, we'll be okay.
00:15:46
Because then if no one laughs at our joke,
00:15:48
it's just now a positive
and inclusive statement.
00:15:51
Finally, people are like
''What if no one takes me seriously?''
00:15:55
''What if people think of me
as a jester or a clown?''
00:15:58
If you're going to use humor at work,
00:16:00
recognize that humor
doesn't replace the work.
00:16:03
Humor is like the salt of a meal.
00:16:05
You wouldn't eat an entire
meal of salt, would you?
00:16:07
Because that would make you a horse.
00:16:09
Do you want to be a horse? I say nay.
00:16:12
(Laughter)
00:16:14
But you can still use humor
00:16:17
as long as you're making it
more productive.
00:16:19
Managers actually want it,
00:16:20
because they know you're going
to be more engaged and get better results.
00:16:24
But let's say you work for an organization
that says no fun whatsoever.
00:16:27
The reality is that no one
can control how you think.
00:16:30
No one can prevent you
from listening to a comedy podcast
00:16:33
on your way home from work
00:16:34
so that you relieve stress
and show up more present for your family.
00:16:37
No one can stop you from creating
a Twitter account to write puns.
00:16:41
No one can keep you from coming up
with chemistry raps while you're working.
00:16:45
The reality is that job satisfaction,
your outlook, your way of managing stress
00:16:49
is entirely your responsibility
and is the choice that you make.
00:16:55
And this is a skill of humor.
00:16:56
It starts by sharing your point of view,
00:16:59
and then we explore
and heighten that point of view.
00:17:02
And we yes-and both our work and our life,
00:17:04
and finally we practice,
perform and repeat,
00:17:07
because that's how we get better.
00:17:09
And people can take an improv class,
or you can try stand-up comedy,
00:17:12
but we can also just be more aware
of how we create humor every single day.
00:17:16
And anyone can do these things.
00:17:19
I'll tell you, the funniest person I know
is my grandmother, the one that texts me.
00:17:24
And she's elevated her game
from texting to Facebook.
00:17:28
She's now on Facebook and she comments
on every single one of my status updates.
00:17:32
And I can't tell
00:17:33
if my grandmother is the nicest,
most sincere grandmother in the world,
00:17:38
or if she is secretly trolling me.
00:17:40
(Laughter)
00:17:41
A couple of months ago, I posted,
00:17:43
''I'm trying to decide if I should
become an athlete or a criminal,
00:17:46
so I made a list of pros and cons.''
00:17:49
My grandmother's response
was one word: ''Funny.''
00:17:52
(Laughter)
00:17:57
I was like, "I don't know.
00:17:58
Does she think it's funny,
or is she messing with me?"
00:18:02
A couple weeks later, I posted,
00:18:03
''I think a cozy bar that serves figs
would make for a plum date spot.''
00:18:08
My grandmother's response was, ''Ha, ha.''
00:18:11
(Laughter)
00:18:12
And I was like, "There's
something about the comma.''
00:18:15
(Laughter)
00:18:16
And I'm like, "She's messing with me."
00:18:20
Then a couple weeks ago, I posted,
00:18:21
''Converting the numbers 51, 6 and 500
to Roman numerals makes me LIVID.''
00:18:26
(Laughter)
00:18:27
My grandmother's response was,
''Hey, this one is actually good.''
00:18:30
(Laughter)
00:18:35
Trolled by my own grandmother.
00:18:37
(Laughter)
00:18:39
It doesn't matter, your age,
your income, your perspective,
00:18:43
your personality assessment,
your senior superlative
00:18:45
or your celebrity doppelganger.
00:18:48
Anyone can learn to be funnier.
00:18:50
And it all starts with a choice,
00:18:52
a choice to try to find ways to use humor,
00:18:54
a choice to be like my grandmother,
00:18:56
to look at the world around you
and think, "WTF -
00:19:00
Wow, that's fun."
00:19:02
Thank you.
00:19:03
(Applause)
