Learn To Control What You Say | Jordan Peterson Best Motivation Speech

00:25:48
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mU8OelqMEok

Sintesi

TLDRCe discours explore le pouvoir des mots et leur rôle crucial dans notre vie quotidienne. Chaque mot prononcé envoie un signal sur notre état d'esprit et nos intentions, et forme notre identité. La prise de conscience de notre langage peut transformer notre manière de penser et d'agir. L'orateur souligne que le contrôle de notre discours est essentiel pour construire une vie pleine de sens et de valeurs. En parlant de manière réfléchie et intentionnelle, nous pouvons créer des interactions positives et aider à façonner notre monde intérieur ainsi que celui des autres. En fin de compte, choisir des mots qui bâtissent plutôt que détruisent contribue à notre développement personnel et à notre bien-être global.

Punti di forza

  • 🗣️ Les mots ne sont pas neutres, ils expriment notre état intérieur.
  • ⚖️ Parler avec intention aide à contrôler notre réalité.
  • 👌 La discipline du discours renforce l'intégrité personnelle.
  • 🔑 Les pauses permettent de choisir ses mots avec soin.
  • 💔 Les mots peuvent blesser et laisser des cicatrices durables.
  • 📈 Parler avec clarté améliore la compréhension et la relation.
  • 🛑 La réaction impulsive peut détruire des relations.
  • ✨ La gentillesse dans la communication est essentielle.
  • 🧠 La maîtrise de soi se reflète dans notre langage.
  • 🌱 Choisir des mots qui bâtissent favorise le développement personnel.

Linea temporale

  • 00:00:00 - 00:05:00

    Les mots ne sont pas de simples bruits ; ils révèlent notre état d'esprit et notre état émotionnel. Chaque phrase que l'on prononce envoie un message sur notre identité, et négliger l'impact de nos mots, c'est ignorer notre chaos intérieur. Nos paroles enseignent aux autres comment nous traiter et façonnent notre propre perception de nous-mêmes. Une parole réactive peut devenir une partie de notre réalité si on ne fait pas attention.

  • 00:05:00 - 00:10:00

    Il est difficile de contrôler ses mots dans des moments de stress. Chaque commentaire impréparé peut affaiblir notre discipline personnelle, qui est cruciale pour bâtir notre vie. Prendre conscience de la tonalité de notre voix et de nos paroles dans des moments de tension est essentiel pour éviter de blesser ceux qui ne le méritent pas. Apprendre à faire une pause renforce la valeur de nos mots et nous aide à retrouver notre pouvoir.

  • 00:10:00 - 00:15:00

    Le silence est souvent perçu comme une faiblesse, alors qu'il peut être une démonstration de force. Lorsque nous choisissons de garder le silence, nous cultivons une compréhension plus profonde de nous-mêmes et des autres. Cette maîtrise de soi devient une véritable stratégie de vie, permettant une communication plus réfléchie et constructive, ainsi qu'une écoute attentive.

  • 00:15:00 - 00:20:00

    Les mots peuvent détruire mais aussi construire, et leur impact perdure souvent plus que les blessures physiques. Une remarque négative peut ancrer des doutes dans notre esprit, tandis qu'un commentaire positif peut transformer notre identité. Les mots doivent donc être utilisés avec prudence afin d'élever les autres au lieu de les diminuer, reflétant ainsi notre responsabilité envers autrui.

  • 00:20:00 - 00:25:48

    La discipline du discours n'est pas seulement une question de communication, mais également un reflet de notre intégrité et de notre évolution personnelle. En s'engageant à choisir des mots avec soin, en s'assurant qu'ils soient vrais, nécessaires et bienveillants, nous construisons une identité solide et respectée. En fin de compte, maîtriser nos paroles permet de forger des relations significatives et de vivre une vie d'impact.

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Mappa mentale

Video Domande e Risposte

  • Pourquoi les mots sont-ils importants ?

    Les mots reflètent notre état émotionnel et influencent la manière dont les autres nous perçoivent.

  • Comment peut-on contrôler ce que l'on dit ?

    Prendre des pauses, réfléchir à la vérité, à la nécessité et à la gentillesse de nos paroles.

  • Que signifie parler avec intention ?

    Choisir nos mots avec soin pour qu'ils renforcent notre intégrité et notre lien authentique avec les autres.

  • Quels sont les effets des mots négatifs ?

    Ils peuvent blesser et gravement affecter l'estime de soi d'une personne.

  • Comment la discipline de la parole influence-t-elle notre identité ?

    Elle permet de façonner le type de personne que nous devenons, en affirmant notre confiance en nous.

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Sottotitoli
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Scorrimento automatico:
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    you know it's a strange thing most
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    people walk around thinking words are
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    just noise just filler just what we do
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    to get through the day but that's not
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    true words aren't neutral they're a
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    reflection of what's going on inside you
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    every sentence you speak is a signal it
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    tells the world something about your
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    mindset your emotional state and even
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    how much
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    selfrol you really have and and if
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    you're not paying attention to the words
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    that come out of your mouth chances are
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    you're not paying attention to what's
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    going on inside your mind either think
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    about it when someone is bitter you hear
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    it in their voice before you even
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    understand the content sarcasm
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    resentment passive aggression those
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    aren't just quirks of personality
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    they're
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    symptoms they're the outer
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    manifestations of something unresolved
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    and what's terrifying is that when we
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    normalize this kind of speech when we
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    stop noticing the tone the impact the
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    negativity it's usually because we've
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    gotten used to the internal chaos that
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    fuels it we've made it part of our
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    identity but here's the truth your words
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    are always teaching the world how to
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    treat you there telling others whether
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    or not you can be taken seriously
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    whether you're reliable whether you're
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    calm under pressure whether you speak
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    from a place of purpose or panic and
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    more than that they're teaching you who
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    you are every time you speak you
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    reinforce the story you tell yourself
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    about yourself if that story is angry
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    reactive self-pittitying or defeist and
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    you say it enough times guess what you
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    start to believe it and then you live it
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    over and over again until it becomes
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    your reality so if you want to take your
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    life seriously if you want to build
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    something meaningful whether it's a
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    business a relationship a career or even
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    just a stronger version of yourself you
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    have to take your word seriously too
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    that's not optional that's foundational
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    because when you begin to control what
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    you say you begin to control how you
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    think and when you control how you think
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    you change how you act and when you
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    change how you act your whole world
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    starts to shift but let's not pretend
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    it's easy it's not especially when
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    you're tired or hurt or triggered by
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    something from your past those are the
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    moments where the mouth runs faster than
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    the mind you snap at someone you make a
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    joke at the expense of someone else you
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    drop a bitter comment that poisons the
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    whole room and afterward maybe you tell
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    yourself "It didn't matter but it did
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    matter it always matters." Because every
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    careless word weakens your discipline
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    and discipline is what separates the
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    person who reacts to life from the one
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    who builds it so what do you do you
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    start small you pay attention to the
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    tone of your voice when you're under
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    stress you catch yourself before you
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    unload your frustration on someone who
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    doesn't deserve it you ask yourself why
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    am I saying this what am I trying to
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    achieve here you learn to pause not
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    because you're afraid to speak but
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    because you respect your words too much
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    to waste them that pause that breath
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    that moment of restraint it's not
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    weakness it's power it's you saying to
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    the chaos inside you you get to speak
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    for me
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    anymore and over time something starts
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    to shift you find that the words you
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    speak carry more weight people listen
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    more closely you start to choose honesty
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    over sarcasm precision over blame
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    encouragement over criticism and what's
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    remarkable is that the more intentional
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    you become with your words the more
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    clarity you gain over your thoughts you
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    start to clean up the clutter in your
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    mind and that right there is when your
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    life begins to rise out of the fog and
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    into something solid something worthy
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    you see the discipline of speech isn't
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    about sounding polished or perfect it's
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    about living in alignment it's about
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    refusing to let your inner chaos leak
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    out into the world in the form of
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    careless words because when you control
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    your words you begin to shape your
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    reality brick by
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    brick and if you do that long enough
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    with enough truth and enough courage you
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    don't just change the way you speak you
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    change the kind of person you are
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    control your words and you reclaim your
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    mind control your mind and you reclaim
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    your life there's this misconception out
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    there that if you don't speak up
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    immediately if you don't fire back if
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    you don't voice your opinion at every
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    turn you're somehow weak passive
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    indecisive but that's not strength
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    that's
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    noise and noise for the most part is the
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    mask people wear when they haven't yet
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    learned to control their emotions let me
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    tell you something silence is not
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    weakness it's not fear it's not
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    avoidance silence in its proper form is
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    strength under
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    control it's the restraint of a person
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    who could speak could lash out could
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    dominate the room but chooses not to why
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    because they understand the value of
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    timing they understand the value of
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    precision they understand that words
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    spoken without clarity without emotional
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    discipline can do more damage than
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    silence ever could think about the last
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    time you said something in anger truly
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    in anger the kind of moment where the
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    words come fast sharp and unfiltered
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    what came after that did you feel better
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    maybe for a split second but what
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    followed was probably regret maybe even
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    guilt you look back and realize you
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    didn't really mean half of what you said
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    but the damage was done words once
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    released can't be pulled back and most
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    of the time when we look back the truth
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    is this we just needed a moment of
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    silence a breath a pause that was all
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    but we don't take that pause do we
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    because silence feels uncomfortable it
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    feels like defeat in a world that tells
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    us we always have to have a comeback
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    always have to defend ourselves always
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    have to be the loudest voice in the room
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    but here's the irony the loudest voice
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    is often the most insecure the one who
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    fills every gap in conversation with
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    noise is usually the one who hasn't yet
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    learned how to sit with their own
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    thoughts they fear silence because they
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    fear what might rise up from it and yet
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    silence is exactly what you need if you
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    want to understand yourself because it's
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    only in silence that clarity emerges
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    it's in silence that your emotions
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    settle enough to be understood and when
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    you understand what you're feeling when
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    you're no longer ruled by it you gain
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    the power to speak from wisdom rather
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    than reactivity that is not weakness
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    that's mastery it takes more strength to
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    stay quiet in a moment of chaos than to
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    unleash every volatile thought that
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    races through your head it takes more
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    selfrespect to walk away from an
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    argument than to win it by tearing
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    someone down and it takes a far deeper
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    kind of courage to say nothing when
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    provoked especially when you know you
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    could say something
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    devastating that's not silence born from
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    fear that's silence born from dominance
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    over self and that's the real battle
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    isn't it not the war of words with other
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    people but the internal battle with your
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    own impulses every time you choose
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    silence over reaction you're telling
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    your emotions you don't get to run the
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    show you're choosing to be intentional
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    instead of instinctive strategic instead
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    of sloppy calm instead of chaotic but
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    silence isn't just a tool for
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    self-control it's a tool for listening
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    when you stop talking you start noticing
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    you start hearing things that were
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    buried beneath your own noise things
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    about the people around you about what's
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    really being said and often things about
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    yourself you begin to observe patterns
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    motives pain points you start to see
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    where your words can actually do good
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    when they're chosen with care when
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    they're placed with precision and when
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    you do speak your words carry weight why
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    because you don't speak all the time you
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    don't fill every space just to be heard
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    people learn to lean in when you talk
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    because they know your silence wasn't
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    empty it was
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    thoughtful and that's the kind of speech
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    that can move people not because it's
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    loud not because it's clever but because
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    it's rooted in something deeper than ego
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    so don't be afraid of silence embrace it
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    cultivate it learn to be alone with your
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    thoughts long enough that they become
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    something worth sharing let your silence
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    be the soil where your strength grows
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    because when you can master the moment
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    between stimulus and response when you
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    can sit in that stillness and hold your
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    ground without speaking you become
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    something grounded dangerous in the best
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    possible way in a world addicted to
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    noise the one who controls their silence
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    controls the room you've probably heard
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    the phrase "Sticks and stones may break
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    my bones but words will never hurt me."
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    It's a nice idea it sounds tough stoic
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    even but it's wrong deep down we all
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    know it words do hurt they linger they
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    echo in the background of our mind
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    sometimes for years you can take a hit
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    to the body and recover bruises fade but
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    a few careless words spoken at the wrong
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    time that can carve into someone's
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    identity that can follow them like a
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    shadow the truth is words are one of the
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    most powerful tools we have and like any
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    tool they can build or destroy a hammer
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    can be used to construct a home or tear
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    one apart same with your speech you can
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    speak life into someone or you can drain
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    it out of them and most people don't
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    realize just how farreaching their words
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    really are they toss out comments like
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    they're weightless a little criticism
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    here a sarcastic jab there a a mocking
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    tone a harsh truth delivered without
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    compassion and then they walk away
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    completely unaware that they may have
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    just shifted the course of someone's
  • 00:09:54
    internal world sometimes all it takes is
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    a single sentence to break a person a
  • 00:10:00
    teacher telling a student "You'll never
  • 00:10:01
    be smart enough." A parent sighing "Why
  • 00:10:04
    can't you be more like your brother?" a
  • 00:10:06
    friend joking you're always the failure
  • 00:10:08
    of the group you hear those things
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    especially when you're young or
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    vulnerable and they become part of the
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    way you see yourself they plant
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    themselves deep like roots and unless
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    someone comes along and speaks a
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    different kind of word one that uplifts
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    one that heals those roots grow but the
  • 00:10:25
    opposite is also true words can rebuild
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    they can offer clarity direction and
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    hope one kind word in the right moment
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    can shift a person's entire sense of
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    identity someone says "I believe in
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    you." And suddenly a door opens in your
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    mind you've got something special and
  • 00:10:40
    maybe for the first time you see
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    yourself not as broken but as
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    capable words when they're honest and
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    intentional have the power to restore
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    dignity they can carry truth into places
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    where lies have been living for years so
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    the question becomes what kind of impact
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    do you want to have on the people around
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    you because you are having an impact
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    whether you recognize it or not the way
  • 00:11:03
    you speak to others your tone your
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    timing your choice of words it's shaping
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    their experience every single day and
  • 00:11:12
    that's a responsibility you shouldn't
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    take lightly especially if you're
  • 00:11:16
    someone people look up to a leader a
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    parent a mentor or even just a friend
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    who shows up when it counts and it's not
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    just about how you speak to others it's
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    also how you speak to yourself because
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    if you're constantly talking to yourself
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    with condemnation judgment defeat those
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    words build a prison inside your own
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    mind and that prison becomes the limit
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    of your potential but if you begin
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    speaking with honesty courage and
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    self-respect even when you fall short
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    then those words become the bricks of a
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    foundation you can stand on they become
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    the voice of reason in the middle of
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    doubt you see words are never neutral
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    they either build or break there's no in
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    between so when you're angry ask
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    yourself am I about to build something
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    here or tear something down when you're
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    giving feedback am I helping this person
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    grow or am I trying to make them feel
  • 00:12:06
    small and when you talk to yourself at
  • 00:12:08
    the end of the day am I reinforcing the
  • 00:12:10
    truth about who I can become or am I
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    repeating old lies that keep me stuck
  • 00:12:14
    this isn't about being soft or
  • 00:12:16
    pretending everything is sunshine and
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    comfort sometimes the most powerful
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    words you'll ever hear are the ones that
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    hold you accountable that wake you up
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    but even those should be rooted in a
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    desire to build not destroy truth is not
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    an excuse to be cruel honesty should
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    never be weaponized it should be
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    delivered with care with precision with
  • 00:12:38
    the intention to lift not crush so speak
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    like it matters because it does choose
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    your words as if someone's future
  • 00:12:45
    depends on them because it might maybe
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    even your own you'll never fully know
  • 00:12:51
    how much power your voice holds until
  • 00:12:53
    you begin using it deliberately
  • 00:12:56
    thoughtfully responsibly when you
  • 00:12:58
    understand the weight of your words you
  • 00:13:00
    don't speak to impress you speak to
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    impact and that's when you stop echoing
  • 00:13:05
    noise and start creating meaning do you
  • 00:13:08
    ever notice how quickly things can
  • 00:13:10
    spiral when you're emotional one second
  • 00:13:12
    you're just slightly irritated and the
  • 00:13:14
    next you're saying something you can't
  • 00:13:15
    take back it happens in a flash and
  • 00:13:18
    afterward you're left staring at the
  • 00:13:20
    damage wondering how a small spark
  • 00:13:22
    turned into a firestorm that's the
  • 00:13:25
    danger of speaking while triggered your
  • 00:13:27
    emotions grab the wheel your rationality
  • 00:13:29
    gets shoved into the back seat and your
  • 00:13:31
    mouth becomes a weapon instead of a tool
  • 00:13:33
    we all have triggers that's part of
  • 00:13:36
    being human maybe it's when someone
  • 00:13:37
    questions your competence or interrupts
  • 00:13:39
    you or ignores your effort maybe it's
  • 00:13:42
    being compared to someone else or being
  • 00:13:43
    dismissed or reminded of something
  • 00:13:46
    you've spent years trying to forget and
  • 00:13:48
    when that trigger gets pulled the
  • 00:13:50
    emotional reaction is intense it feels
  • 00:13:53
    immediate overwhelming like something
  • 00:13:56
    inside you has to be expressed and in
  • 00:13:58
    that moment your instinct is to let the
  • 00:14:01
    words fly to defend to retaliate to
  • 00:14:04
    reclaim your sense of control but here's
  • 00:14:06
    the problem when you speak from that
  • 00:14:09
    place you're not responding to the
  • 00:14:11
    present you're reacting from the
  • 00:14:14
    past you're not just dealing with what
  • 00:14:16
    was said or done in that moment you're
  • 00:14:18
    dealing with everything that's ever made
  • 00:14:20
    you feel that same
  • 00:14:22
    way that's why it feels so big so
  • 00:14:25
    personal because it is but it's not
  • 00:14:28
    about them it's about something
  • 00:14:29
    unresolved in you and if you don't
  • 00:14:31
    recognize that you'll keep saying things
  • 00:14:34
    you regret you'll keep burning bridges
  • 00:14:37
    you didn't need to burn you'll keep
  • 00:14:39
    wounding people who didn't deserve it
  • 00:14:41
    and worst of all you'll keep reinforcing
  • 00:14:43
    the lie that you can't control yourself
  • 00:14:45
    when you're emotional but you can you
  • 00:14:49
    must because every time you speak from a
  • 00:14:51
    triggered state you hand over your power
  • 00:14:54
    you become a puppet pulled by old
  • 00:14:55
    strings and those strings are often tied
  • 00:14:57
    to pain you haven't named memories you
  • 00:15:00
    haven't processed truths you haven't
  • 00:15:01
    accepted so what's the way out first you
  • 00:15:03
    have to pause
  • 00:15:05
    that's the hard part not the apology
  • 00:15:07
    after the damage not the cleanup the
  • 00:15:10
    pause the moment where you feel the
  • 00:15:12
    adrenaline surge the anger rise the heat
  • 00:15:14
    in your chest and you don't say a word
  • 00:15:16
    you breathe you recognize the feeling
  • 00:15:18
    for what it is a signal not a command
  • 00:15:21
    just because your emotions are loud
  • 00:15:23
    doesn't mean they're right just because
  • 00:15:25
    something feels true doesn't mean it is
  • 00:15:29
    and in that space those few seconds of
  • 00:15:31
    restraint you reclaim something
  • 00:15:33
    incredibly valuable choice the ability
  • 00:15:37
    to respond instead of react the ability
  • 00:15:39
    to use your words constructively even
  • 00:15:42
    when your emotions are screaming for
  • 00:15:43
    destruction that's not weakness that's
  • 00:15:46
    discipline that's strength at its most
  • 00:15:49
    mature and the people who can do that
  • 00:15:50
    consistently those are the ones who are
  • 00:15:52
    trusted those are the ones who lead
  • 00:15:54
    because they don't just control what
  • 00:15:56
    they say they control why they say it
  • 00:15:58
    now that doesn't mean you bury your
  • 00:16:00
    emotions or pretend they're not there no
  • 00:16:03
    you acknowledge them fully you face them
  • 00:16:05
    with honesty but you don't give them the
  • 00:16:08
    microphone until they've been filtered
  • 00:16:10
    through clarity and intention that takes
  • 00:16:13
    practice it takes emotional awareness
  • 00:16:16
    and it takes a willingness to admit that
  • 00:16:18
    some of the most damaging things you've
  • 00:16:20
    ever said weren't about the other person
  • 00:16:22
    they were about your own unresolved pain
  • 00:16:23
    finding an escape route when you start
  • 00:16:25
    doing this when you catch yourself in
  • 00:16:27
    that moment between feeling and speaking
  • 00:16:29
    you begin to notice patterns you see the
  • 00:16:31
    same emotional themes repeating in
  • 00:16:34
    different conversations different
  • 00:16:36
    conflicts different relationships and
  • 00:16:38
    instead of blaming everyone else for
  • 00:16:40
    pushing your buttons you realize those
  • 00:16:41
    buttons exist because you haven't
  • 00:16:43
    rewired them you've been living
  • 00:16:44
    reactively and now you get to live
  • 00:16:46
    intentionally this is what growth looks
  • 00:16:48
    like it's not about never getting
  • 00:16:49
    triggered
  • 00:16:51
    it's about recognizing your triggers and
  • 00:16:53
    refusing to let them dictate your
  • 00:16:55
    behavior it's about learning to sit with
  • 00:16:58
    discomfort without unleashing it on the
  • 00:17:00
    people around you and it's about
  • 00:17:02
    honoring your values more than your
  • 00:17:04
    feelings cuz your feelings come and go
  • 00:17:05
    but your words stay your words leave
  • 00:17:08
    footprints and you have to decide what
  • 00:17:10
    kind of path you want those footprints
  • 00:17:12
    to leave behind when you gain control
  • 00:17:14
    over your emotional responses your words
  • 00:17:16
    begin to carry a different weight not
  • 00:17:19
    heavy with regret or hostility but
  • 00:17:21
    strong with purpose they become
  • 00:17:24
    instruments of clarity not chaos and in
  • 00:17:27
    mastering those moments those quiet
  • 00:17:30
    critical pauses you don't just change
  • 00:17:33
    how you speak you change who you are
  • 00:17:36
    becoming and that kind of transformation
  • 00:17:39
    begins not with the right words but with
  • 00:17:41
    the wisdom to know when not to say them
  • 00:17:45
    there's a simple filter that if
  • 00:17:47
    practiced consistently could transform
  • 00:17:49
    not just your conversations but your
  • 00:17:51
    character it's this is it true is it
  • 00:17:55
    necessary is it kind most people speak
  • 00:17:58
    without running their words through any
  • 00:17:59
    filter at all they just say what they
  • 00:18:01
    feel what they assume what they think
  • 00:18:02
    will win the moment but power doesn't
  • 00:18:04
    come from speaking freely power comes
  • 00:18:06
    from speaking wisely truth is the first
  • 00:18:08
    gate and that alone is difficult because
  • 00:18:11
    it requires brutal honesty not just with
  • 00:18:14
    others but with yourself you have to ask
  • 00:18:17
    do I know this to be true or is this
  • 00:18:20
    just what I believe because I'm upset or
  • 00:18:22
    insecure or trying to protect my ego
  • 00:18:25
    that's hard because truth has a cost
  • 00:18:26
    sometimes it humbles you sometimes it
  • 00:18:28
    forces you to admit you're wrong but if
  • 00:18:31
    you can't speak from truth everything
  • 00:18:32
    else collapses your words become noise
  • 00:18:35
    opinions dressed up as facts and
  • 00:18:37
    eventually people stop listening and
  • 00:18:39
    rightly so because the world has enough
  • 00:18:42
    misinformation enough half-truths enough
  • 00:18:46
    emotionally charged commentary what it
  • 00:18:48
    needs desperately is people who are
  • 00:18:50
    courageous enough to tell the truth even
  • 00:18:52
    when it's inconvenient but truth on its
  • 00:18:54
    own isn't enough that's where a lot of
  • 00:18:56
    people go wrong they confuse being blunt
  • 00:18:59
    with being honest thinking that as long
  • 00:19:01
    as it's true they're justified in saying
  • 00:19:04
    it but that's only one piece of the
  • 00:19:06
    equation after you ask if something's
  • 00:19:09
    true you have to ask is it necessary
  • 00:19:12
    because not everything that's true needs
  • 00:19:13
    to be said not in every moment and not
  • 00:19:15
    to every person timing matters intent
  • 00:19:18
    matters sometimes silence is more
  • 00:19:19
    helpful than unleashing a truth that's
  • 00:19:21
    going to harm more than heal think about
  • 00:19:23
    a moment when someone pointed out one of
  • 00:19:25
    your flaws not to help you grow but just
  • 00:19:27
    to put you down maybe they were
  • 00:19:29
    technically right but their words didn't
  • 00:19:30
    serve a purpose other than to elevate
  • 00:19:33
    themselves or cut you down that's what
  • 00:19:36
    truth without necessity looks like it's
  • 00:19:38
    clumsy it's self- serving it might win
  • 00:19:40
    the argument but it loses the
  • 00:19:41
    relationship and if you're trying to
  • 00:19:43
    build something meaningful in life trust
  • 00:19:45
    connection respect you can't afford to
  • 00:19:47
    speak that way now the third filter is
  • 00:19:50
    it
  • 00:19:51
    kind that's where the depth comes in
  • 00:19:54
    because kindness is not weakness it's
  • 00:19:56
    not coddling it's not saying nice things
  • 00:19:58
    to avoid discomfort real kindness is
  • 00:20:01
    fierce it's deliberate it's the kind of
  • 00:20:03
    strength that doesn't need to dominate
  • 00:20:04
    to be effective and when your words are
  • 00:20:06
    both true and necessary kindness is what
  • 00:20:08
    determines how those words land it's the
  • 00:20:10
    difference between a scalpel and a
  • 00:20:12
    sledgehammer both can cut but only one
  • 00:20:14
    is precise enough to heal and kindness
  • 00:20:17
    doesn't mean avoiding hard conversations
  • 00:20:20
    sometimes the kindest thing you can do
  • 00:20:22
    is say what no one else has the courage
  • 00:20:24
    to say if you say it with with
  • 00:20:26
    compassion if you say it with the other
  • 00:20:28
    person's growth in mind because when
  • 00:20:30
    people know that you care not just about
  • 00:20:33
    being right but about being good your
  • 00:20:36
    words gain influence they carry weight
  • 00:20:38
    they're not just heard they're received
  • 00:20:40
    but here's the catch this filter these
  • 00:20:43
    three questions they only work if you
  • 00:20:45
    slow down enough to use them and in a
  • 00:20:49
    world that rewards speed reaction
  • 00:20:52
    volume that's rare most people respond
  • 00:20:54
    in milliseconds they're triggered they
  • 00:20:56
    speak they're annoyed they unload
  • 00:20:58
    there's no gap between feeling and
  • 00:21:00
    speaking and without that gap there's no
  • 00:21:03
    filter no reflection just raw emotion
  • 00:21:05
    disguised as communication so you've got
  • 00:21:08
    to learn to slow it down practice the
  • 00:21:10
    pause let your emotions settle before
  • 00:21:13
    you decide to speak and when you do ask
  • 00:21:16
    yourself is what I'm about to say
  • 00:21:18
    actually true does it need to be said
  • 00:21:20
    right now and if so can I say it in a
  • 00:21:23
    way that's respectful that reflects who
  • 00:21:25
    I want to be because that's the deeper
  • 00:21:28
    truth your words don't just reflect who
  • 00:21:32
    you are in the moment they shape who you
  • 00:21:34
    become every sentence you speak is a
  • 00:21:37
    thread in the fabric of your character
  • 00:21:39
    and over time those threads weave
  • 00:21:41
    together a reputation a legacy a life so
  • 00:21:46
    the question isn't just whether your
  • 00:21:47
    words are right the question is are they
  • 00:21:50
    building the kind of person you want to
  • 00:21:52
    be speak truthfully speak when it
  • 00:21:54
    matters speak with kindness even when
  • 00:21:56
    it's hard because when you live by that
  • 00:21:59
    standard your words stop being reactive
  • 00:22:01
    they become intentional transformative
  • 00:22:04
    anchored in strength not ego and in a
  • 00:22:06
    world full of noise that kind of voice
  • 00:22:09
    stands out not because it's the loudest
  • 00:22:12
    but because it speaks with purpose when
  • 00:22:14
    you discipline your speech you're not
  • 00:22:15
    just managing your words you're shaping
  • 00:22:17
    your identity every time you choose to
  • 00:22:20
    speak thoughtfully instead of
  • 00:22:21
    impulsively you affirm something deep
  • 00:22:23
    within yourself i am someone who can be
  • 00:22:26
    trusted even by
  • 00:22:28
    me that's what self-respect really is
  • 00:22:31
    it's not about inflating your ego or
  • 00:22:32
    pretending to be perfect it's about
  • 00:22:34
    being able to look yourself in the
  • 00:22:36
    mirror and say "I handled that well i
  • 00:22:39
    spoke with intention i didn't betray my
  • 00:22:42
    values just because I was angry or
  • 00:22:44
    afraid or looking for approval." See
  • 00:22:46
    when your words are all over the place
  • 00:22:48
    when you say whatever comes to mind
  • 00:22:49
    whenever it comes to mind you begin to
  • 00:22:51
    lose that sense of inner stability you
  • 00:22:54
    feel chaotic inside because you've
  • 00:22:56
    allowed your speech to be driven by
  • 00:22:58
    emotion impulse insecurity and over time
  • 00:23:02
    that chips away at your confidence
  • 00:23:05
    because you know deep down that you're
  • 00:23:08
    not in
  • 00:23:09
    control that your mouth runs faster than
  • 00:23:11
    your mind and sometimes even faster than
  • 00:23:13
    your
  • 00:23:14
    heart and that kind of person might
  • 00:23:16
    impress others in the moment but they
  • 00:23:19
    can't trust themselves to speak from a
  • 00:23:21
    place of clarity but the moment you
  • 00:23:23
    start putting structure around your
  • 00:23:25
    speech when you begin to hold back words
  • 00:23:27
    that don't serve a purpose when you
  • 00:23:29
    speak even difficult truths with care
  • 00:23:31
    when you choose to stay silent rather
  • 00:23:33
    than escalate a conflict you begin to
  • 00:23:36
    feel solid inside rooted you begin to
  • 00:23:39
    carry yourself differently because you
  • 00:23:41
    know that what you say actually means
  • 00:23:43
    something and that creates dignity not
  • 00:23:46
    the kind that demands respect from
  • 00:23:47
    others but the kind that quietly
  • 00:23:49
    commands it
  • 00:23:51
    you don't build self-respect through
  • 00:23:53
    grand gestures you build it in the small
  • 00:23:55
    consistent decisions especially in the
  • 00:23:57
    way you speak because your voice isn't
  • 00:23:59
    just how you communicate with others
  • 00:24:02
    it's how you shape the world around you
  • 00:24:04
    and when your words are disciplined your
  • 00:24:07
    life begins to follow what you say
  • 00:24:10
    becomes who you are and who you are
  • 00:24:11
    becomes someone you're proud to be so
  • 00:24:14
    when you really step back and consider
  • 00:24:15
    the weight of it all your words your
  • 00:24:18
    tone your timing you start to see that
  • 00:24:20
    speech isn't just a tool it's a
  • 00:24:23
    responsibility it's a reflection of your
  • 00:24:26
    inner world your maturity your values
  • 00:24:29
    and if you want to live a life of
  • 00:24:30
    meaning of real depth you cannot afford
  • 00:24:33
    to treat that responsibility lightly
  • 00:24:36
    because every word you speak is either
  • 00:24:38
    adding to the chaos or helping to bring
  • 00:24:40
    order it's either tearing down what
  • 00:24:43
    matters or helping to build something
  • 00:24:44
    that lasts when you learn to control
  • 00:24:47
    what you say you're not just protecting
  • 00:24:50
    others you're protecting yourself your
  • 00:24:52
    integrity your future your peace the
  • 00:24:55
    world is full of noise but you you can
  • 00:24:59
    choose to be different you can choose to
  • 00:25:02
    be precise purposeful grounded you can
  • 00:25:05
    choose words that build that heal that
  • 00:25:07
    carry truth without cruelty and
  • 00:25:09
    conviction without arrogance and when
  • 00:25:11
    you do something remarkable happens
  • 00:25:13
    people listen they trust you and more
  • 00:25:15
    importantly you begin to trust yourself
  • 00:25:17
    so speak less carelessly speak more
  • 00:25:20
    deliberately let silence serve you when
  • 00:25:23
    it should let truth guide you when it's
  • 00:25:25
    needed and let kindness lead always
  • 00:25:29
    because the discipline of your speech is
  • 00:25:31
    not the end of growth it's the beginning
  • 00:25:34
    of becoming someone worth listening
  • 00:25:36
    to and in a world starving for
  • 00:25:40
    wisdom your
  • 00:25:42
    voice used
  • 00:25:44
    well might just be the
Tag
  • communication
  • emotions
  • discours
  • pensée
  • identité
  • confiance
  • responsabilité
  • écoute
  • silence
  • bienveillance