how to develop delusional confidence (even as an introvert)

00:05:53
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oCTRa2urXCI

概要

TLDRThe speaker challenges the idea that confidence can be obtained by mimicking characters like James Bond. Instead, they suggest adopting a mindset where life is viewed as a game, allowing oneself to laugh and engage freely without the burden of others' opinions. The speaker identifies four key pillars to building genuine confidence: being articulate, working out, dressing well, and becoming an interesting person through engaging in diverse activities. Articulation aids in clear communication, working out enhances both external and internal confidence, dressing well boosts self-assurance, and having hobbies or stories to share makes one attractive socially. The speaker encourages focusing on actions that lead to personal pride, contributing to self-esteem and confidence.

収穫

  • 🎭 Life is a game: Treat it lightly to reduce fear and gain confidence.
  • 🗣️ Articulation matters: Being well-spoken boosts confidence in conversations.
  • 🏋️‍♂️ Workout benefits: Exercising builds both physical and inner confidence.
  • 👗 Dress to impress: A good sense of style can enhance how you feel about yourself.
  • 🌟 Be interesting: Cultivate hobbies for stories and conversation starters.
  • 🤷‍♂️ Shrug off opinions: Most people don't notice or care about your actions.
  • 💪 Challenge norms: Be confident within societal norms to be taken seriously.
  • 📚 Add value: Share knowledge and experiences to engage with others.
  • 🎉 Enjoy life: Having fun without overthinking leads to genuine confidence.
  • 👍 Stay proud: Engage in activities that make you feel proud to boost self-worth.

タイムライン

  • 00:00:00 - 00:05:53

    The video begins by challenging typical advice on gaining confidence, criticizing the idea of emulating James Bond as unrealistic for the average person who is not a spy. The speaker promotes seeing life as a game where outcomes shouldn't be taken so seriously, which can reduce nervousness and self-consciousness. They share a personal anecdote about becoming more confident by caring less about others' opinions and enjoying the moment. The core advice is to build confidence by not worrying excessively about others' perceptions while remaining aware of social norms. Key strategies include being articulate, dressing well, building physical fitness, and becoming an interesting person with stories and hobbies. Emphasizing self-pride in achievements, like reaching a gym goal, enhances confidence, illustrated by comparing days spent playing video games versus setting a personal best at the gym.

マインドマップ

ビデオQ&A

  • What is the main theme of the video?

    The video is about building real confidence with mindset shifts and practical steps.

  • How does the speaker suggest viewing life to gain confidence?

    By pretending that life is a game and not taking things too seriously.

  • What mindset does the speaker advise against for gaining confidence?

    Trying to emulate James Bond or being an overly stoic, emotionless person.

  • What are the four pillars of confidence mentioned?

    1. Being articulate. 2. Working out. 3. Dressing well. 4. Being interesting.

  • What does the speaker say about the importance of being articulate?

    It helps you speak confidently to anyone and handle awkward situations gracefully.

  • Why is working out recommended for confidence?

    It builds both external attractiveness and internal self-assurance.

  • How does the speaker suggest improving your dressing style?

    Look for outfit inspiration on Pinterest and Instagram, then buy similar clothes.

  • What activities does the speaker recommend for becoming more interesting?

    Engaging in hobbies, adventures, and reading to gather stories and knowledge.

  • What does the speaker say about caring about others' opinions?

    People often don't notice or care about what you do, so stop worrying about their opinions.

  • What is the ultimate benefit of performing actions that make you proud?

    It boosts self-confidence by making you feel proud and accomplished.

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オートスクロール:
  • 00:00:00
    despite what every other Guru on YouTube
  • 00:00:02
    will tell you you will not become
  • 00:00:03
    Confident by trying to copy what James
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    Bond does trying to mirror 007 will only
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    lead to you becoming that quiet guy in
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    the corner of the party not smiling
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    insecure of what everyone else is
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    thinking you're probably a pretty normal
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    guy in his 20s who isn't an
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    international spy in real life
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    confidence is not exactly what the
  • 00:00:20
    movies portray the biggest mindset shift
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    I took on the road to becoming more
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    confident was pretending that everything
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    was a game it's all just a big
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    simulation that everyone takes way too
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    seriously but you're able to do whatever
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    you'd like Laugh Smile joke around stop
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    taking things so seriously the main
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    reason why you aren't confident is
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    because you're nervous that you'll do or
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    say something stupid go up to that girl
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    and ask her how her day is worst case
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    scenario you say something stupid it's
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    not that serious it's just a game laugh
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    it off and go about your day I remember
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    back in school I used to be nervous to
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    raise my hand to ask a question in class
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    I would think oh everyone is going to
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    think I'm stupid or I bet everyone
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    already knows the answer to this or some
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    other excuse to make up for my lack of
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    confidence once I started pretending
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    that everything was just a big game I
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    stopped caring what everyone else
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    thought of what I'd say and I instantly
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    gain confidence even if I did say
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    something stupid and people laughed I
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    just laughed with them in a charismatic
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    way you don't always have to be an ultra
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    stoic man who never Smiles people like
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    people who are able to laugh at
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    themselves and not take life so
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    seriously it's a refreshing feeling the
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    main idea is to stop caring what other
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    people think you need to realize that
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    random people either don't notice you or
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    just don't care about about what you're
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    doing so why would you care what they
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    think just do what you want now this is
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    the mindset you need to be confident but
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    you also need to understand that we live
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    in the real world and social norms still
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    apply you have the ability to do
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    whatever you want and be confident in
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    doing that but that doesn't mean you
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    should be completely delusional to
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    people around you you can be super
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    confident walk up to any person and say
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    some dumb just because you feel
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    like it but that defeats the whole
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    purpose of this in the first place you
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    want to feel strong inner confidence not
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    caring what others think but do this
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    within most of the rules and social
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    norms of society to avoid delusion and
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    actually have other people take you in
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    your confidence seriously you have to
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    follow four pillars first you need to
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    learn how to be articulate next you need
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    to work out third you should start
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    dressing well and finally you should
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    become an interesting person the first
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    pillar learning how to be articulate is
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    important for two reasons first it gives
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    you the ability to speak to anyone if
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    you can speak well it means you can walk
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    up to successful men women you find
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    attractive or any other random person
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    and know for a fact that you won't sound
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    like an idiot when you speak there are
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    so many men who get nervous when
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    speaking to new people this nervousness
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    is a direct path to insecurity and a
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    lack of confidence you also want to
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    become articulate because when you
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    inevitably say or do something stupid
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    you're able to express yourself and sort
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    of talk your way out of what you just
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    did if you slip on the ground while
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    walking with a girl instead of freezing
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    up in embarrassment you should do
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    something like laugh it off then use
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    your words to think of some clever or
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    ironic line to make her laugh about the
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    situation too my best piece of of advice
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    for becoming more articulate is simply
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    listening to podcasts or interviews
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    constantly with people who speak very
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    well than trying to talk like them when
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    you're out in social situations if you
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    do this for long enough you'll start to
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    put your own spin on how to speak
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    clearly and you'll just become a great
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    speaker the next pillar is very
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    straightforward if you don't already you
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    need to start working out specifically
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    you should be lifting weights it doesn't
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    matter if you're a skinny twig or a big
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    boy you want to aim to become that guy
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    who genuinely feels confident when
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    taking his shirt off at the beach if you
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    don't don't currently feel confident
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    doing that it's a clear sign that you
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    need to hit the gym not only does this
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    build confidence in the external with
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    people noticing your gains but more
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    importantly it buils internal confidence
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    knowing that you're a guy who's in shape
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    who had to work hard for that now I'm
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    not saying you have to become Bradley
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    Martin but I would at least aim for an
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    athlete's physique the third pillar is
  • 00:03:49
    another easy and simple one learn how to
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    dress well when you walk into a room
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    full of people and know that you are the
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    best dressed guy there the feeling
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    instantly boosts your confidence not to
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    mention even if you're not super
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    attractive girls will still check you
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    out if you know how to style yourself
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    style communicates a lot in so many
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    subconscious ways it tells other people
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    that you care about your appearance you
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    know how to take care of yourself you
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    have money to spend and that you're in
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    the know because you have an idea on
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    current trends and fashion and know what
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    looks good you don't even have to know
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    anything about Style just go on
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    Pinterest and Instagram find some
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    outfits that you like and buy those from
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    Zara or H&M it's really as simple as
  • 00:04:25
    that don't over complicate this the
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    final pillar to building your confidence
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    is becoming an interesting person I hope
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    I'm not calling you out here when I say
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    this but someone with no Hobbies who
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    sits in their room all day playing video
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    games is not an interesting person you
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    need stories to tell hobbies to share
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    and knowledge to give if you have
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    nothing interesting to share with others
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    you will probably have no friends and
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    that is a confidence killer get outside
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    and touch some grass go do something
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    adventurous with your friends start
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    reading books on topics that interest
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    you people at a dinner party would much
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    rather hear a story about how you and
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    your friends got kicked out of a Walmart
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    at 2 in the morning for doing something
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    outrageous than hearing about the new
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    Mandalorian episode that just came out
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    this is an extreme example but you get
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    the point start adding stories to your
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    collection and gain valuable knowledge
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    that can better your life while also
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    giving you interesting topics to talk
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    about the final point I want to include
  • 00:05:16
    is focus on doing things that make you
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    proud of yourself let's take a man on
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    two different days on day one he sits
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    around all day in his room playing video
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    games a week later this same guy goes to
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    the gym and sets a new personal best on
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    his bench press if this same guy went to
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    a bar on both of those nights which
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    version of him would be more likely to
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    have the confidence to go up and
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    approach a girl of course the version of
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    this guy on the day he sets a personal
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    best not only is he excited and
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    energized from that PR but he also has a
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    strong sense of being proud of himself
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    which boosts confidence and that's
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    pretty much it don't forget to like
  • 00:05:50
    comment and subscribe and I'll see you
  • 00:05:52
    in the next one
タグ
  • Confidence
  • Mindset
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