Therapist Reacts to THE ROAD TO EL DORADO

00:28:28
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8TtUPLS_ZrM

Resumo

TLDRIn this discussion, Miguel and Tulio from 'The Road to El Dorado' explore their friendship dynamics, characterized by humor, banter, and differing personalities. They highlight the importance of communication in relationships, emphasizing how their playful teasing reflects a deep understanding and respect for each other. The conversation also touches on the film's comedic elements and the significance of expressing feelings, suggesting that healthy friendships require balance and openness. Ultimately, their interactions serve as a reminder of the value of friendship and the need to navigate challenges together.

Conclusões

  • 👬 Miguel and Tulio showcase a deep friendship.
  • 😂 Their banter reflects mutual understanding.
  • 💬 Communication is key in relationships.
  • ⚖️ Balance between different personalities is important.
  • 🎭 Humor helps navigate challenges.
  • ❤️ Expressing feelings strengthens friendships.
  • 🎥 'The Road to El Dorado' is a comedic adventure.
  • 🤝 Healthy friendships require openness.
  • 🗣️ Teasing can be a sign of affection.
  • 🌟 Their dynamic highlights the importance of support.

Linha do tempo

  • 00:00:00 - 00:05:00

    Miguel and Tulio introduce themselves and discuss their friendship dynamics, highlighting how different relationships have unique rules of engagement. Jono emphasizes the importance of understanding each other's rhythms and cadences in friendships, which contributes to their lasting bond.

  • 00:05:00 - 00:10:00

    Alan and Jono begin discussing the animated film 'The Road to El Dorado', noting its humor and banter. They reflect on the voice acting of Kevin Kline and Kenneth Branagh, and how their chemistry enhances the film's dynamic. They also touch on the importance of expressing feelings in friendships.

  • 00:10:00 - 00:15:00

    The conversation shifts to the characters' regrets and the sweetness of their friendship. Alan and Jono analyze the comedic elements of the film, while also discussing the deeper themes of friendship and emotional connection, emphasizing the importance of expressing care for loved ones.

  • 00:15:00 - 00:20:00

    Alan promotes the Galaxy Projector, a device that transforms rooms into planetariums, while sharing a personal anecdote about his daughter's fascination with space. He highlights the projector's customizable features and energy efficiency, encouraging viewers to check it out.

  • 00:20:00 - 00:28:28

    As the discussion continues, Alan and Jono explore the characters' dynamics in 'The Road to El Dorado', focusing on the balance of worry between Miguel and Tulio. They discuss how different personalities can affect relationships and the importance of finding a middle ground to alleviate stress in friendships.

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Vídeo de perguntas e respostas

  • What is the main theme of the discussion?

    The main theme revolves around friendship dynamics, communication, and the balance between different personalities.

  • Who are the main characters discussed?

    The main characters discussed are Miguel and Tulio from 'The Road to El Dorado'.

  • What do Miguel and Tulio represent in their friendship?

    They represent different personality types, with Miguel being carefree and optimistic, while Tulio is more cautious and sarcastic.

  • What is the significance of their banter?

    Their banter showcases their deep friendship and understanding of each other, allowing them to tease without taking offense.

  • How does the conversation relate to real-life friendships?

    It emphasizes the importance of communication, understanding, and expressing feelings in maintaining healthy friendships.

  • What role does humor play in their relationship?

    Humor serves as a bonding mechanism, allowing them to navigate challenges and express their feelings in a light-hearted way.

  • What is the overall tone of the discussion?

    The tone is light-hearted, humorous, and reflective, focusing on friendship and personal growth.

  • What film are they discussing?

    They are discussing 'The Road to El Dorado', an animated film.

  • What lesson can be learned from their friendship?

    A key lesson is the importance of finding a balance in relationships and being open about feelings.

  • How do Miguel and Tulio resolve their conflicts?

    They resolve conflicts through open communication, humor, and understanding each other's perspectives.

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  • 00:00:01
    Miguel: I am Miguel.
  • 00:00:02
    Tulio: And I am Tulio.
  • 00:00:04
    Miguel: And they call us Miguel and Tulio.
  • 00:00:06
    Jono: This is our language. This is how we back and forth.
  • 00:00:09
    Alan: Because this is Miguel.
  • 00:00:10
    Jono: And this is Tulio.
  • 00:00:11
    Alan: You don't worry enough.
  • 00:00:12
    Jono: I don't, and you worry too much.
  • 00:00:13
    Alan: I worry exactly the right amount.
  • 00:00:15
    Tulio: Don't push your luck with this guy.
  • 00:00:17
    Miguel: But, Tulio, we're the gods!
  • 00:00:21
    Jono: Different couples, different friendships, different families have different rules of engagement.
  • 00:00:25
    And you have to find the rhythm and the cadence and the language that works best for you.
  • 00:00:29
    And that's what these two have.
  • 00:00:31
    It's one of the markers of their lasting friendship.
  • 00:00:33
    Tulio: You know that little voice that people have that tells them to quit when they're ahead?
  • 00:00:37
    You don't have one.
  • 00:00:38
    Jono: If we're feeling especially sensitive or that there's distance between us,
  • 00:00:41
    we're more prone to be hurt. We're more prone to take things personally.
  • 00:00:44
    Alan: We look for ways that, Oh, they're trying to hurt me.
  • 00:00:47
    Jono: And you know what? They got there.
  • 00:00:49
    Because these guys always get there and they're gonna always work through their issues.
  • 00:00:52
    In the four more movies that now only exist in my brain.
  • 00:00:56
    Miguel: Now that was an adventure.
  • 00:00:59
    Tulio: Yes. Yes it was.
  • 00:01:08
    Alan: Hello and welcome to Cinema Therapy.
  • 00:01:09
    I'm Alan Seawright, a professional filmmaker who needs therapy.
  • 00:01:12
    That guy is not me.
  • 00:01:13
    Jono: No, I am. I am... not. I am my own person!
  • 00:01:17
    I'm Jonathan Decker, a licensed therapist who loves movies.
  • 00:01:20
    And you wouldn't know it from that moment, but I hold a master's degree.
  • 00:01:24
    Alan: He went to school for a long time, guys. He's real good at stuff.
  • 00:01:28
    Jono: So what are we doing today?
  • 00:01:29
    Alan: I'm gonna have you react, as you often do,
  • 00:01:31
    to a film, a beloved animated classic...? Question mark.
  • 00:01:36
    The Road To El Dorado.
  • 00:01:37
    Jono: Oh, this is fun.
  • 00:01:38
    Alan: It was very fun. I'd never seen it until we were getting ready for this episode.
  • 00:01:42
    But it is a fun little romp with great banter.
  • 00:01:45
    Alan: Oh man, the banter and the slapstick comedy in this are legitimately phenomenal.
  • 00:01:50
    [may the silliness commence]
  • 00:01:52
    Miguel: Look, on the positive side, at least things can't get...
  • 00:01:56
    Tulio: Excuse me. Were you... Were you going to say worse?
  • 00:01:58
    Miguel: Tulio, did you ever imagine it would end like this?
  • 00:02:03
    Tulio: The horse is a surprise.
  • 00:02:07
    Miguel: Any... regrets?
  • 00:02:10
    Tulio: Besides dying?
  • 00:02:12
    Yeah.
  • 00:02:15
    I never... had enough... gold.
  • 00:02:21
    Miguel: My regret...
  • 00:02:24
    besides dying is...
  • 00:02:26
    our greatest adventure is over before it began.
  • 00:02:30
    And no one will even remember us.
  • 00:02:33
    Tulio: Well, if it's any consolation, Miguel...
  • 00:02:37
    You made my life... an adventure.
  • 00:02:43
    Miguel: And if it's any consolation, Tulio...
  • 00:02:47
    You made my life... rich.
  • 00:02:52
    Altivo: [gets diabetes because of the sweetness]
  • 00:03:03
    Miguel: Ah, ah...
  • 00:03:10
    Tulio: Hmm. Miguel: Is it...?
  • 00:03:12
    Miguel: It is. It's... It's...
  • 00:03:16
    [mwah, mwah, mwah]
  • 00:03:22
    [shrieks]
  • 00:03:26
    Alan: Telling you man. The comedy hits. Jono: It does.
  • 00:03:29
    Alan: It's really funny.
  • 00:03:30
    Jono: So we got Kevin Kline and Kenneth Branagh. Alan: Yep.
  • 00:03:33
    Jono: What a pairing.
  • 00:03:34
    Alan: At the height of their powers. Recorded together. Jono: Yeah.
  • 00:03:37
    Alan: In the booth. Jono: Really?
  • 00:03:38
    Alan: Yeah. Jono: Because usually separate.
  • 00:03:39
    Alan: Separated by days, weeks, months.
  • 00:03:41
    Alan: No, they got both of them in the booth together, which I think adds to the chemistry. Jono: Yeah, for sure.
  • 00:03:45
    Alan: Because they've got really good interplay with each other,
  • 00:03:47
    and it's tough to do that when you've never met the person.
  • 00:03:50
    Jono: So what are the logistical advantages and disadvantages of that, would you say?
  • 00:03:54
    Alan: The only real disadvantage is when you're editing,
  • 00:03:58
    you don't get to, like, clip every single syllable into the sound that you like
  • 00:04:02
    Alan: because they might be talking over each other. Jono: Yeah.
  • 00:04:04
    Alan: But you get the dynamic interplay of, like, a person stepping on somebody else
  • 00:04:09
    Alan: because they're so excited to do it. We do this all the time. Jono: Yeah.
  • 00:04:12
    Jono: So what I'm pulling from this is don't wait until you're about to die
  • 00:04:16
    to let the people you care about know that you care about them.
  • 00:04:20
    And this is, you know, very traditionally an alpha male old school thing
  • 00:04:24
    where we don't share our feelings.
  • 00:04:26
    I feel like societally, we are slowly coming out of it
  • 00:04:30
    with us leading the way, let's be honest. And...
  • 00:04:32
    But here they're letting each other know. And it's a beautiful moment.
  • 00:04:36
    If you've ever had the experience of losing someone you care about,
  • 00:04:38
    how important it is to make sure you do that all along the way.
  • 00:04:42
    Alan: Have you ever wanted to explore and see new sights, like Tulio and Miguel?
  • 00:04:46
    Chart your own course with the stars as your guide?
  • 00:04:49
    Well, the Galaxy Projector brings that right to your room.
  • 00:04:52
    It will transform any room into a planetarium
  • 00:04:55
    and give it a truly unique look and feel.
  • 00:04:58
    But not only that. It's also a smart device.
  • 00:05:01
    The settings are fully customizable.
  • 00:05:02
    RGB colours, brightness, and rotation speed.
  • 00:05:05
    It also has on/off timers.
  • 00:05:07
    With the app, you can adjust all the settings and make it truly yours.
  • 00:05:10
    My daughter is obsessed with space right now.
  • 00:05:13
    In fact, she's so obsessed, she wants to be an astronomer.
  • 00:05:16
    So we put the Galaxy Projector in her room,
  • 00:05:18
    where she is obsessed with the rainbow swirly nebula.
  • 00:05:21
    And if you're using Amazon Alexa or Google Assistant, you're in for a treat.
  • 00:05:25
    You can simply tell them what you want, and the Galaxy Projector listens.
  • 00:05:28
    Turn it on or off, change colours, change settings, all hands-free.
  • 00:05:32
    And it's also energy-efficient, so you won't see a spike in your electric bill
  • 00:05:36
    for going to the stars!
  • 00:05:40
    Space. It takes energy to get there. You see what I d-- You get it.
  • 00:05:44
    The Galaxy Projector is perfect for any room or any setting.
  • 00:05:47
    Click the link below and go check out The Galaxy Lamp store.
  • 00:05:50
    And use code CINEMATHERAPY to get 15% off your purchase right now.
  • 00:05:56
    Alan: Trying to find El Dorado...
  • 00:06:01
    The movie called The Road To El Dorado...
  • 00:06:05
    ...takes 24 minutes.
  • 00:06:06
    Tulio: We found it.
  • 00:06:07
    Alan: The rest of the movie should be called The Hangout in El Dorado. Jono: Yes.
  • 00:06:10
    Miguel: Where? Tulio: Here.
  • 00:06:11
    Miguel: Behind the rock?
  • 00:06:12
    Tulio: No, no. This is it.
  • 00:06:14
    Miguel: Give me that.
  • 00:06:16
    Jono: He just trolled him so hard.
  • 00:06:18
    Tulio: El Dorado is native for...
  • 00:06:21
    Great. Big. Rock!
  • 00:06:25
    Echo: Rock! Rock! Rock! Rock.
  • 00:06:28
    Tulio: Hey, but I'll tell you what. I'm feeling generous so you can have my share.
  • 00:06:33
    Miguel: You didn't think Cortez could have gotten here before us and...
  • 00:06:36
    Tulio: And what? Taken all the really big rocks? The scoundrel!
  • 00:06:40
    Miguel: Tulio! We... We have to think about this.
  • 00:06:42
    I mean, we've come all this way, and we, we, we, we should. We should really...
  • 00:06:45
    Tulio: Get. On. The. Horse.
  • 00:06:53
    Tulio: No, no, no, no, not with the face. Stop!
  • 00:06:57
    Jono: I do think you're Tulio. And I'm Miguel. Alan: Really?
  • 00:07:00
    Jono: Miguel's the blond one, right? Alan: Yeah.
  • 00:07:02
    Jono: Yeah, because Tulio is far more sarcastic. Alan: That's true.
  • 00:07:05
    Jono: And Miguel is far more wide eyed and optimistic
  • 00:07:08
    and just throws himself headlong into things without thinking about it
  • 00:07:11
    and drags his friend along for the ride.
  • 00:07:13
    Alan: And I do regret that I don't have enough gold.
  • 00:07:17
    Jono: Just that Tulio would wake Miguel up like it's Christmas morning. Alan: Just to troll him.
  • 00:07:22
    Jono: All excited, knowing he's gonna turn on him and throw it in his face,
  • 00:07:27
    is such a college roommate thing to do.
  • 00:07:30
    In fact, I'm pretty sure you did this to me one time
  • 00:07:33
    when I set you up with a girl and you came back from the date,
  • 00:07:36
    and I'm like, How was it? And you're like, Well... And I'm like...
  • 00:07:39
    And then you're like, It was a dumpster fire. What were you thinking?
  • 00:07:43
    Alan: That is actually accurate. I remember. The date was bad.
  • 00:07:47
    Jono: What's really sweet to me about Miguel is he knows he's just been trolled,
  • 00:07:51
    and instead of getting offended and defensive, he just, like, moves on because this is our language.
  • 00:07:57
    This is how we back and forth. And I'm not even bothered by it anymore.
  • 00:08:01
    And you know what? If you have someone that you know loves and respects you,
  • 00:08:05
    they can give you all sorts of crap and you won't take it personally.
  • 00:08:08
    It's only when you feel disrespected and unloved
  • 00:08:10
    that that registers as offensive or cruel or hurtful.
  • 00:08:14
    Jono: We definitely have that dynamic.
  • 00:08:16
    You can tease me about things that I'm like, Well, I know it's Alan
  • 00:08:20
    and I know he loves me, so I'm not going to get offended
  • 00:08:22
    that if somebody else would, I would get so mad.
  • 00:08:25
    Alan: The number of times you have, like, come after me
  • 00:08:28
    about my relationship with my mom that have not ended up on the show.
  • 00:08:32
    Alan: Like, you would think this man hates me. Jono: No.
  • 00:08:35
    Alan: But it's so funny every time.
  • 00:08:37
    Jono: That's why I do it. Because it makes you laugh.
  • 00:08:40
    Jono: I don't have a dog in that fight. Alan: I know.
  • 00:08:43
    Jono: Like, I don't care.
  • 00:08:44
    Tulio: We just have to keep this up long enough to load up on the gold
  • 00:08:48
    and then get the hell out of here.
  • 00:08:50
    Miguel: Tulio! We'll be... We'll be living like kings.
  • 00:08:53
    Tulio: Miguel and Tulio!
  • 00:08:55
    Miguel: Tulio and Miguel! Mighty and powerful gods.
  • 00:09:00
    [high-pitched screams]
  • 00:09:03
    Tulio: Depart, mortal, before we... strike you with a lightning bolt.
  • 00:09:10
    Miguel: Beware the wrath of the gods. Be gone.
  • 00:09:13
    Chel: Save it for the high priest, honey. You're gonna need it.
  • 00:09:16
    Tulio: Miguel, it's not working. Miguel: [hisses]
  • 00:09:19
    Tulio: Miguel. We've been caught.
  • 00:09:21
    Chel: Oh, no. Don't worry about me, boys. My only wish is to serve the gods. Remember?
  • 00:09:27
    Jono: So, scam artists, and I think their one code is that we won't scam each other. Alan: Yeah.
  • 00:09:32
    Jono: We've got each other's back. And you do see that in a lot of friendships.
  • 00:09:36
    It's the code. Like you look after the man you're with, right?
  • 00:09:38
    You look after the person in your group.
  • 00:09:40
    How much of Miguel's, you know, things that he was doing.
  • 00:09:44
    Do you think is animators just watching the tapes
  • 00:09:48
    of what was happening in the sound booth versus creating it after the fact?
  • 00:09:51
    Alan: That's the question I had, because most of the time you, you know,
  • 00:09:54
    have a ton of work already done. You've storyboarded, you know, to the nth degree,
  • 00:09:59
    you know, exactly what the character is going to be doing in every scene.
  • 00:10:01
    Alan: And you tell the actor. Jono: Yeah.
  • 00:10:03
    Alan: In this case, because the two of them are together,
  • 00:10:05
    I assume they riffed a little bit and played off of each other,
  • 00:10:08
    Alan: and that very much feels like a... [hiss, hiss] Jono: Yeah.
  • 00:10:12
    Alan: ...like a thing that Kenneth Branagh was just kind of doing on the day.
  • 00:10:15
    Alan: And the directors were like, Put that in the movie. Jono: Yeah.
  • 00:10:19
    Alan: It's just like you showed the tape to the animators and like, you know,
  • 00:10:22
    Miguel lit up a little bit, but do that.
  • 00:10:24
    Miguel: Both? Tulio: Both.
  • 00:10:25
    Miguel: Both. Both is good.
  • 00:10:26
    Jono: Now, a big part of healthy friendship is sharing triumphs together.
  • 00:10:31
    I wouldn't necessarily advocate scamming an entire city of people
  • 00:10:34
    as a triumph worth celebrating.
  • 00:10:36
    Alan: But, hey, if that's your gig...
  • 00:10:38
    Jono: No, listen. Stop. We're no... Alan: No?
  • 00:10:40
    Jono: No. Alan: Oh.
  • 00:10:41
    Jono: No. Don't scam an entire town full of people.
  • 00:10:46
    What?
  • 00:10:48
    Tulio: Miguel, how are we gonna keep this up for three days?
  • 00:10:51
    Miguel: You worry too much.
  • 00:10:53
    Tulio: No. I worry exactly the right amount.
  • 00:10:55
    You can never worry too much.
  • 00:10:58
    We just have to lie low.
  • 00:11:02
    Miguel: But, Tulio, this place is amazing. I mean, I wonder what's... Tulio: NO!
  • 00:11:09
    Jono: We have a record scratch.
  • 00:11:10
    Tulio: You're moving. Miguel: A little, but...
  • 00:11:12
    Tulio: Hey, hey, hey! Miguel: Come on.
  • 00:11:13
    Alan: Honestly, that's what they should have done with all of the music in this movie. Jono: Oh, gosh.
  • 00:11:17
    Tulio: Just stand there.
  • 00:11:21
    Miguel: For three days? Alan: Little shakes before he falls.
  • 00:11:25
    Tulio: Exactly. For three days. Don't even breathe, all right?
  • 00:11:31
    Jono: So, one worries too much. One doesn't worry at all.
  • 00:11:34
    Tulio: Promise? Miguel: Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah. All right, all right, all right.
  • 00:11:37
    Jono: Part of a healthy partnership or relationship is meeting in the middle.
  • 00:11:40
    Because usually what happens is we... we react and respond to each other,
  • 00:11:44
    and then we start to drift in reaction. I see this a lot in family therapy with parents.
  • 00:11:49
    One parent is too lenient, so the other goes more strict.
  • 00:11:53
    And then in response to this one being seen as too strict,
  • 00:11:55
    this one goes even more lenient to cut the kids some slack.
  • 00:11:58
    And because of this, this one extends even further out.
  • 00:12:01
    And so it's all about saying, Okay, what's a healthy balance?
  • 00:12:04
    We do have different personalities.
  • 00:12:06
    I am never going to be as vigilant as you are, Tulio,
  • 00:12:10
    because you're a very vigilant person.
  • 00:12:12
    Alan: Oh, I thought that was you just talking to me. Jono: No.
  • 00:12:15
    Alan: Because this is Miguel.
  • 00:12:17
    Jono: What? And this is Tulio.
  • 00:12:18
    Alan: You don't worry enough.
  • 00:12:19
    Jono: I don't, and you worry too much.
  • 00:12:21
    Alan: I worry exactly the right amount.
  • 00:12:22
    Jono: Oh, sure.
  • 00:12:24
    But... but say, listen, I could worry more, so you could worry less, for example. Right?
  • 00:12:28
    And that's how we alleviate the stress. And I do feel like, in all honesty,
  • 00:12:33
    I mean, we're accurately describing some of our dynamic.
  • 00:12:36
    But I also feel like over time we have done what we're talking about.
  • 00:12:39
    Alan: Oh, we very much... Jono: Yeah.
  • 00:12:40
    Alan: ...met more in the middle. Yeah.
  • 00:12:41
    Jono: Yeah. Which reminds me of our Mrs. Doubtfire episode.
  • 00:12:44
    We talk about this dynamic of drifting apart and responding reactively to each other.
  • 00:12:49
    Alan: Yeah. Like pre-divorce they're... Jono: Yeah.
  • 00:12:51
    Alan: Pulling further and further apart. Yeah.
  • 00:12:57
    Miguel: Excuse me.
  • 00:12:58
    Alan: Miguel. Not following Tulio's advice.
  • 00:13:01
    Miguel: Hey. Where is everybody?
  • 00:13:04
    Warrior: Well, they've been cleared from the streets, my lord.
  • 00:13:06
    So the city can be cleansed as you ordered.
  • 00:13:10
    Miguel: Cleansed?
  • 00:13:11
    Warrior: Yes. So the Age of the Jaguar can begin as you ordered.
  • 00:13:17
    Warrior: Where are you going?
  • 00:13:18
    Miguel: Hey, hey! Stop that!
  • 00:13:19
    Jono: It's, you know, it's the PG version of an ethnic cleansing.
  • 00:13:22
    Miguel: What are you doing? Stop that!
  • 00:13:23
    Warrior: But my lord. Anyone who disobeys your orders must be punished as you ordered.
  • 00:13:29
    Alan: Or just, you know, a totalitarian whatever. Jono: Yeah.
  • 00:13:32
    Warrior: Tzekel-Kan has made your commands clear, my lord.
  • 00:13:35
    Miguel: Really? Here's an order. Take the day off.
  • 00:13:42
    Are you all right?
  • 00:13:45
    Here.
  • 00:13:48
    Oh, no. It's all right. Please.
  • 00:14:01
    Jono: I love how well-formed this character is, though,
  • 00:14:03
    Jono: because a person who is carefree... Miguel: Hey, Altivo.
  • 00:14:06
    Jono: ...is also generally gonna do all these sorts of things.
  • 00:14:09
    They're going to be caring. They want everyone else to have a good time.
  • 00:14:13
    Jono: They don't... Who cares about order? Let's have fun. Alan: Yeah.
  • 00:14:16
    Jono: And they're all... It's an... It's a relationship oriented extrovert personality type.
  • 00:14:21
    I call it the dreamer personality. And he's totally got this.
  • 00:14:26
    [laughter and chatter]
  • 00:14:29
    Jono: Hey, Alan, the music's starting. Oh.
  • 00:14:31
    Alan: Hey. I wonder why I cut out just then.
  • 00:14:35
    Alan: Oh my gosh, that's so sad.
  • 00:14:37
    Alan: It's a not memorable song.
  • 00:14:39
    Jono: For what it's worth, I actually...
  • 00:14:40
    Alan: That was actually one of the better songs.
  • 00:14:42
    Jono: I was gonna say I don't, I don't think the music, especially this song I liked,
  • 00:14:45
    I don't think the music is bad as much as unnecessary and unmemorable.
  • 00:14:49
    Alan: It's unnecessary, unmemorable, and a bunch of it doesn't really forward the story.
  • 00:14:53
    So it's just like, okay, take a break for a musical number now.
  • 00:14:56
    And that's just boring. And it slows everything down.
  • 00:14:58
    Alan: This is very... You're very much a dreamer healer personality, right? Jono: As I'm watching this...
  • 00:15:02
    Alan: You wanna bring people together, you want to have fun with them.
  • 00:15:04
    Alan: You want them to feel great. Jono: Yeah.
  • 00:15:06
    Alan: You don't want them to be persecuted and maybe executed.
  • 00:15:08
    Jono: Yeah. I don't.
  • 00:15:09
    Was that political?
  • 00:15:12
    Alan: Wow, what a humanitarian.
  • 00:15:14
    Jono: I can definitively say that I do not want that.
  • 00:15:18
    In case there was any question about where I stand.
  • 00:15:20
    Alan: He's not pro-human sacrifice. He's anti-human sacrifice, guys.
  • 00:15:24
    Jono: Well, I do relate a lot to Miguel because he's a dreamer and he's a healer,
  • 00:15:28
    so he's fun loving and he has big ideas,
  • 00:15:30
    doesn't always have a plan for executing them or his plans aren't really thought out.
  • 00:15:34
    That's the balance, right? But he's really fun loving and lovable,
  • 00:15:37
    and he's all about, how can I make people feel safe
  • 00:15:40
    and how can people feel comfortable and at home? And it's just warm.
  • 00:15:44
    But also, as a healer, he can be overly sensitive or more prone to getting his feelings hurt.
  • 00:15:49
    Tzekel-Kan: And now you will, of course, wish to have the losing team sacrificed.
  • 00:15:53
    To your glory.
  • 00:15:57
    Miguel: Not again.
  • 00:15:59
    Look, Tzekel-Kan, forget the sacrifices.
  • 00:16:04
    We don't want any sacrifices.
  • 00:16:06
    Tzekel-Kan: But all of the sacred writings say
  • 00:16:09
    that you will devour the wicked and the unrighteous.
  • 00:16:11
    Miguel: Well, I don't see anyone here who fits that description.
  • 00:16:16
    Tzekel-Kan: Well, as speaker for the gods, it would be my privilege to point them out.
  • 00:16:22
    Miguel: The gods are speaking for themselves now!
  • 00:16:25
    This city and these people have no need for you anymore.
  • 00:16:31
    There will be no sacrifices.
  • 00:16:35
    Not now, not ever.
  • 00:16:40
    Get out!
  • 00:16:52
    Jono: Blood!
  • 00:16:56
    Tzekel-Kan: As the "gods" command.
  • 00:17:02
    Alan: What shadow is he backing into? Nobody knows, but it's awesome.
  • 00:17:06
    Miguel: Hey...
  • 00:17:07
    Jono: There's not a cloud in the sky.
  • 00:17:08
    Alan: Not a cloud in the sky. He's not going in behind a building.
  • 00:17:12
    Tulio: Yeah. Fine.
  • 00:17:13
    Jono: Damn you!
  • 00:17:15
    Alan: Sorry. I always have to ruin it.
  • 00:17:17
    Alan: But look. Who cares? It was awesome. Jono: Yeah.
  • 00:17:19
    Alan: He was saying an ominous thing and backing into the shadows.
  • 00:17:22
    It doesn't matter.
  • 00:17:23
    Jono: Now, I have to say, on the surface, this seems like a white savior trope movie.
  • 00:17:27
    But when you pay attention, it's a roast of white savior tropes.
  • 00:17:31
    Alan: Hundred percent.
  • 00:17:31
    Jono: Because these guys are moronic con artists.
  • 00:17:34
    Alan: Easily the most competent person in the entire place is the chieftain.
  • 00:17:38
    Jono: Yeah, the heavyset chieftain who... He sees faster than anybody what's going on.
  • 00:17:42
    Alan: He immediately cottons on to like, Oh, these guys are frauds.
  • 00:17:45
    But hey, at least I can use them to get rid of this, like, jerk priest.
  • 00:17:49
    Jono: And at the end of the day, everybody saves everyone together. Alan: Right.
  • 00:17:53
    Jono: It's not these guys, like, writing it and making it happen.
  • 00:17:55
    And continuing on about Miguel.
  • 00:17:58
    He fully steps into... Because dreamers tend to be performers.
  • 00:18:01
    So he's like, Oh, I can use my fake godhood to effect real change,
  • 00:18:05
    real positive change for the people, not for myself, for the people.
  • 00:18:09
    And so he does the booming voice. "The gods are now speaking for themselves".
  • 00:18:12
    And you know what? He's good at it.
  • 00:18:15
    Alan: He's built up a lifetime of experience of faking his way through the [beep] that he got himself into. Jono: Yeah.
  • 00:18:20
    Alan: Right? Jono: Yep.
  • 00:18:21
    Alan: Because this is a problem. Like, he was like, hey, let's have some games.
  • 00:18:24
    Alan: And then the priest turns it around on him and is like, well, now you have to sacrifice the losers. Jono: Oh, man.
  • 00:18:29
    Alan: And he's like, you know, obviously this is completely against his code
  • 00:18:32
    Alan: because as we've established, anti-human sacrifice. Jono: Yeah.
  • 00:18:35
    Alan: But this,again, is a thing that, like, dreamer personality types are extremely good at,
  • 00:18:40
    is sort of faking their way through whatever problem they've gotten into.
  • 00:18:44
    Up until the point where they can't.
  • 00:18:47
    Chel: Oh, like you don't want me to want to go to Spain.
  • 00:18:50
    Tulio: I want you to want...
  • 00:18:51
    Chel: Mhm?
  • 00:18:52
    Tulio: ...what you want.
  • 00:18:55
    Chel: Mhm. Go on.
  • 00:18:57
    Tulio: All right. Cards on the table.
  • 00:19:01
    Uh, I want you to come to Spain with me and Miguel.
  • 00:19:05
    Mostly me.
  • 00:19:06
    Especially me.
  • 00:19:07
    Only me.
  • 00:19:08
    Forget Miguel.
  • 00:19:10
    Chel: Well, as long as that's what you want me to.
  • 00:19:17
    Tulio: Okay. Deal?
  • 00:19:20
    Chel: Deal.
  • 00:19:30
    Alan: I don't know what the horse is seeing. Miguel: Well, forget Tulio.
  • 00:19:34
    Jono: But it's not a kiss.
  • 00:19:35
    Alan: It's not kissing.
  • 00:19:37
    Jono: Ha ha ha. You are so right!
  • 00:19:41
    It's a burden being right all the time.
  • 00:19:44
    Jono: Tulio, letting the walls down, saying, I want you to come to Spain with me and Miguel.
  • 00:19:48
    Well, mostly me. Okay, only me. Forget Miguel.
  • 00:19:52
    Jono: He's not actually saying, Forget my friend, screw him. I don't care about him. Alan: Right.
  • 00:19:56
    Jono: He's saying, I want you to come from me. I want there to be an us.
  • 00:20:00
    And he's just being kind of cheeky about it.
  • 00:20:02
    Honestly, I think it's a bit of a reach for Miguel to leap to the conclusion
  • 00:20:06
    Jono: that it was anything but that. Alan: Sure.
  • 00:20:08
    Jono: This is not someone he's just meeting. He knows Tulio, he knows how he speaks,
  • 00:20:13
    and he knows his his sense of humor and his style of wordplay.
  • 00:20:16
    It does create a bit of contrived drama that Miguel takes this so to heart.
  • 00:20:21
    Alan: I will say, though, that this is not the only thing that's happened, right?
  • 00:20:24
    Alan: Because Miguel has expressed already, Hey, I want to stay here. Jono: Yeah.
  • 00:20:29
    Alan: Like, I really like it here.
  • 00:20:30
    We're doing better here than we've ever done anywhere else.
  • 00:20:32
    And Tulio was like, No, no, no, no, that's dumb.
  • 00:20:34
    Alan: This is a further wedge... driving the wedge that already wedged into more of a wedge...? Jono: Yeah.
  • 00:20:40
    Alan: It's like... Jono: It's a triple wedge.
  • 00:20:42
    Alan: It's no longer acute.
  • 00:20:43
    Jono: Yeah. Listen... Alan: Like, obtuse...
  • 00:20:45
    Jono: The bark is not split. It is obliterated. I get it, I'm here for you, pal.
  • 00:20:49
    Jono: I'm gonna help you through this metaphor here. Right? Alan: I butchered it.
  • 00:20:52
    Jono: If we're feeling especially sensitive or that there's distance between us,
  • 00:20:56
    we're more prone to be hurt, we're more prone to take things personally.
  • 00:20:59
    Alan: Well, we look for ways that, Oh, they're trying to hurt me. Right?
  • 00:21:02
    Jono: Right. And, you know, this is yet another time where,
  • 00:21:05
    as a relationship therapist, I would encourage people just to talk
  • 00:21:09
    instead of avoiding assuming and then just drifting apart.
  • 00:21:14
    Unfortunately, I can't criticize the writers for taking the characters here
  • 00:21:18
    Jono: because people tend to do the latter instead of the former all the time. Alan: They do.
  • 00:21:23
    Jono: And this brings to mind the word "pride" has a couple of connotations.
  • 00:21:26
    There's a positive side of that. I'm proud of you, you know.
  • 00:21:28
    Or... or pride in your heritage, pride of who you are.
  • 00:21:32
    But there's there's a nasty underbelly or an ugly side of pride,
  • 00:21:36
    which is I'm unteachable. I'm closed. I'm not humble. I'm not accountable.
  • 00:21:40
    In the case of Tzekel-Kan, he cannot learn and grow past his own religious dogma
  • 00:21:45
    to see and appreciate the life and the people around him.
  • 00:21:47
    In the case of our protagonist, their pride, because they go into a whole tiff off of this
  • 00:21:52
    and they get really huffy and pissy with each other
  • 00:21:55
    and they make little jabs. And then, you know,
  • 00:21:58
    Tulio at first doesn't know what Miguel is upset about,
  • 00:22:00
    and then pretty soon he doesn't care. He just knows he's being mistreated.
  • 00:22:03
    So he starts jabbing back.
  • 00:22:04
    And that wedge you were talking about, or those three wedges...
  • 00:22:08
    That was belabored. Uh...
  • 00:22:10
    Really... Really...
  • 00:22:12
    Alan: Fair. Fair.
  • 00:22:14
    Jono: Really, really come between them.
  • 00:22:16
    And I don't see a positive function of pride in that sense.
  • 00:22:21
    I only see it as a stumbling block.
  • 00:22:23
    And if I had these two in my office for, like, buddy therapy,
  • 00:22:27
    because, you know, couples aren't the only people who get therapy.
  • 00:22:30
    It's all relationship therapy.
  • 00:22:31
    I'd say, Guys, okay, first of all, let's clear the air.
  • 00:22:34
    Miguel, please tell Tulio what you overheard and how it landed for you.
  • 00:22:39
    What it sounded like to you and ask him is that what he meant?
  • 00:22:42
    What was he going for? And give him a chance to explain himself and to be accountable.
  • 00:22:47
    And if Tulio was getting defensive, I would call him on that.
  • 00:22:51
    Keep that in check. Engage in some perspective taking.
  • 00:22:54
    Put yourself in Miguel's shoes.
  • 00:22:56
    If you had overheard him with a woman saying, Forget Tulio.
  • 00:23:00
    What conclusions would you draw? Or how would you feel?
  • 00:23:03
    And if it's not the same as what he's feeling,
  • 00:23:05
    Jono: can you at least see why he feels the way he does? Alan: Right.
  • 00:23:08
    Jono: Generally speaking, in relationships of goodwill
  • 00:23:11
    where there's not years of built up resentment and anger
  • 00:23:16
    with that conversation, it's a pretty quick fix.
  • 00:23:18
    Most people arrive at, Oh, I'm really sorry.
  • 00:23:20
    That's not what I meant. And I love you.
  • 00:23:22
    You're my best friend and I want you with me. Right?
  • 00:23:25
    And because these two don't have years of piled up resentment,
  • 00:23:28
    it's a pretty quick fix if we have that conversation.
  • 00:23:32
    Tzekel-Kan: I know what you are.
  • 00:23:36
    Alan: Well, here's a quick fix. Tzekel-Kan: ...what you're not.
  • 00:23:38
    Alan: Fighting for your life.
  • 00:23:40
    Tzekel-Kan: Gods!
  • 00:23:45
    Alan: The way they designed and animated this, like, zealot.
  • 00:23:48
    Tulio: You lied to me?
  • 00:23:49
    Alan: So great. Jono: "You lied to me?"
  • 00:23:50
    Jono: And this is what they did at the beginning of the movie.
  • 00:23:52
    Alan: Uh, this is a bit that...
  • 00:23:54
    Tulio: How dare you!
  • 00:23:55
    Miguel: Hey, it was his stupid plan.
  • 00:23:58
    Tulio: Oh, my plan was that we should lie low.
  • 00:24:02
    But your plan was to run off and be all, Oh, look at me, look at me. I'm a god.
  • 00:24:07
    Jono: Just like a peacock.
  • 00:24:09
    Tulio: Who are you kidding? You're buying your own con!
  • 00:24:12
    Miguel: At least I'm not dating mine. Tulio: I...
  • 00:24:15
    Tulio: Ooh. Low blow. Listen, mister high and mighty,
  • 00:24:19
    we'd both be sailing out of here with a mountain of gold
  • 00:24:22
    if you had just listened to me.
  • 00:24:24
    Jono: I love the animation of Tzekel-Kan as he listens.
  • 00:24:26
    Miguel: Ooh, precious gold and Chel. So we're gonna...
  • 00:24:29
    Jono: Tear them apart from the inside.
  • 00:24:30
    Tulio: Maybe I don't need you anymore.
  • 00:24:32
    Miguel: Well, then why don't you just go back to Spain
  • 00:24:34
    and I'll stay here and we'll both get what we want.
  • 00:24:38
    Tulio: That's fine with me, pal.
  • 00:24:40
    Miguel: Fine with me, too.
  • 00:24:41
    Tulio: Fine. Tzekel-Kan: Ouch.
  • 00:24:42
    Miguel: Okay.
  • 00:24:43
    Together: All right.
  • 00:24:45
    Alan: Again...
  • 00:24:46
    Tulio: Tie him up. Alan: It's a fake fight.
  • 00:24:50
    Alan: But everything they're saying is true and real. Jono: Yeah.
  • 00:24:55
    Jono: They're using their real feelings to sell the bid. Alan: To sell the bid.
  • 00:25:00
    Jono: Which is a fun piece of writing for the movie.
  • 00:25:07
    Jono: Man. Dreamworks with the sound design. Alan: Beefy.
  • 00:25:12
    We have the meat.
  • 00:25:14
    Jono: Listen, here's the thing.
  • 00:25:17
    I do think that the principles of family therapy, relationship therapy,
  • 00:25:20
    can help us to resolve our conflicts generally speaking, in the healthiest,
  • 00:25:24
    Jono: most supportive, most straightforward manner. Alan: Sure.
  • 00:25:27
    Jono: I also know that people resolved conflicts before they were therapists.
  • 00:25:32
    And sometimes, if you have someone who is willing to calmly assess
  • 00:25:36
    and take accountability and make changes, you know, take ownership
  • 00:25:40
    and engage in perspective taking,
  • 00:25:42
    you can lay things out in the ugliest way possible.
  • 00:25:45
    I mean, how many times in your life, frankly, I mean, like,
  • 00:25:48
    in your marriage or with friendships, have you had an ugly blowup
  • 00:25:52
    and then come together and made up, and it was beautiful.
  • 00:25:54
    And it's like, well, I wish we hadn't done it as an ugly blowup.
  • 00:25:57
    But we did say what needed to be said.
  • 00:25:59
    Alan: And it happened quickly.
  • 00:26:01
    Jono: Yeah, because at least it's all out there.
  • 00:26:03
    I mean, what therapy does is it helps you get it all out there
  • 00:26:06
    Jono: without necessarily doing it in the ugliest, meanest way. Alan: Sure.
  • 00:26:09
    Jono: You know, but those things that they were saying, needed to be said,
  • 00:26:13
    they needed to call each other out and say, This is what you're doing that hurts me.
  • 00:26:17
    This is what you're doing that is hurting our friendship.
  • 00:26:19
    And you know what? They got there because these guys always get there
  • 00:26:22
    and they're going to always work through their issues.
  • 00:26:25
    In the four more movies that now only exist in my brain.
  • 00:26:28
    Alan: Man, I really wish we'd gotten to see more of these,
  • 00:26:30
    Alan: because I would have loved to go on a bunch more adventures with Miguel and Tulio. Jono: I know.
  • 00:26:34
    Alan: And I will say that even though what they're saying is mean and it is a fight,
  • 00:26:38
    Alan: it is a staged fight, and it is the context for them. Jono: Yeah.
  • 00:26:42
    Alan: Is different. Jono: Yeah.
  • 00:26:44
    Alan: Tzekel-Kan is seeing, Oh, these guys hate each other and they're fighting.
  • 00:26:47
    They know, Okay, we can get these truths out, and we can be open and vulnerable with each other.
  • 00:26:51
    And it's going to look and sound worse than it is.
  • 00:26:54
    Jono: And they've done this before. In fact, I would suspect
  • 00:26:56
    this is how they've worked through quite a few of their issues in the past.
  • 00:27:00
    This is a mutually agreed upon parameters for how we can have these conversations.
  • 00:27:03
    Alan: When we pull the fake fight to get out of the thing.
  • 00:27:05
    And while we're doing the fake fight, well, here's actually two real things.
  • 00:27:08
    So maybe you're going to slap me a little harder than you would,
  • 00:27:10
    but you're already gonna slap me anyway, so who cares?
  • 00:27:12
    Jono: Well, there's something to be said about, like, different couples, different friendships,
  • 00:27:16
    different families have different rules of engagement.
  • 00:27:19
    Because I've visited families or I've had people in my office
  • 00:27:23
    where I initially thought, Well, that's... Whoa, that's mean, that's ugly.
  • 00:27:27
    Alan: These people yell at each other.
  • 00:27:29
    Jono: And they say, No, this is... This is what works for us.
  • 00:27:30
    And it legitimately does.
  • 00:27:32
    And so I've learned with time to observe long enough to see,
  • 00:27:36
    Jono: is this a pattern that serves them that everyone's okay with. Alan: Right.
  • 00:27:40
    Jono: Because what is hurtful to one person is just airing grievances to another,
  • 00:27:45
    and you have to find the rhythm and the cadence and the language that works best for you.
  • 00:27:49
    And that's what these two have. It's one of the markers of their lasting friendship.
  • 00:27:54
    Alan: So, until next time...
  • 00:27:57
    Jono: Did you ever think that it would end like this?
  • 00:28:01
    Alan: The horse is a surprise.
  • 00:28:04
    Internet Dads: And... watch movies.
  • 00:28:08
    Jono: Shout out and thank you to our Patrons over on Patreon
  • 00:28:11
    who get extended commercial-free Director's Cuts
  • 00:28:13
    Folks like...
  • 00:28:14
    Alan: Kyra C.
  • 00:28:16
    Jono: Willow.
  • 00:28:16
    Alan: Taylor Garrett.
  • 00:28:18
    Jono: Resh.
  • 00:28:19
    Alan: And TheCheskaEffect.
  • 00:28:20
    Jono: That's very cool.
  • 00:28:21
    Alan: That is... I want to know what the Cheska effect is,
  • 00:28:23
    and I want it to be a thriller from the 90s.
  • 00:28:26
    Jono: Thank you, Patrons.
Etiquetas
  • friendship
  • communication
  • humor
  • The Road to El Dorado
  • Miguel
  • Tulio
  • animated film
  • relationship dynamics
  • teasing
  • personal growth