00:00:00
Translator: Trina Orsic
Reviewer: Mirjana Čutura
00:00:10
Thank you for inviting me.
00:00:12
It's a pleasure to be here.
00:00:14
I feel like I'm at home.
00:00:17
I have 18 minutes to talk,
but my problem will be time
00:00:19
because I love to talk.
00:00:21
I also talk very fast,
so this may be an advantage.
00:00:25
I would like to reflect
00:00:27
on the importance of one's attitude
in personal interactions.
00:00:31
I want to talk about
how people are like light bulbs.
00:00:37
We're like light bulbs
because we transmit.
00:00:40
Light bulbs with feet
since we move throughout life.
00:00:43
There are people that go around
at 30,000 watts
00:00:46
and others that go around burnt out.
00:00:48
Everyone transmits energy,
but the difference is relevant.
00:00:52
At times after meeting someone
for just three seconds, we say,
00:00:57
"Wow, what an exceptional person!"
00:01:00
And other times after meeting someone
for a few seconds, we say,
00:01:05
"Oh, no no no ..."
00:01:07
Call it "feeling" or "chemistry,"
but these sensations exist.
00:01:11
Human beings transmit feelings,
00:01:13
and we receive the emotions
that others transmit.
00:01:16
In this way, we are like light bulbs.
00:01:19
I actually wanted to provide
an example of the bulb metaphor.
00:01:24
It's not in the script,
but I'll play with time
00:01:27
because the best way
to explain an idea is with examples.
00:01:30
I really enjoy cold weather;
I'm crazy for the mountains.
00:01:33
I am happy in Ordino,
00:01:35
so I don't understand
people who like the beach.
00:01:38
I respect it, but I don't understand it.
00:01:40
It's super hot and crowded.
00:01:42
The water is boiling.
00:01:43
You burn your feet walking on the sand.
00:01:45
The salt from the sea gets everywhere ...
00:01:47
The beach is not my thing.
00:01:50
But I am fortunate to have
a wife and kids who love the beach.
00:01:54
So each year, for one weekend,
I make an exception.
00:01:57
Instead of staying in Ordino,
we go to the beach.
00:02:00
Since I'm not familiar with hotels,
00:02:03
each year I choose a hotel
by sending out a tweet,
00:02:06
"Anyone recommend a nice hotel
that's not expensive,
00:02:09
where I can stay
with my family at the beach?"
00:02:12
And there are kind people
who reply to my tweets.
00:02:15
In the replies, one hotel kept
getting repeated,
00:02:19
so I figured it must be a great hotel.
00:02:22
I went on the hotel's website,
but there weren't any photos.
00:02:25
I don't know about you or your partners,
00:02:28
but for my wife - without photos,
she is not convinced.
00:02:31
My wife wants to see photos of the hotel,
the garden, the pool, the room,
00:02:36
the bathroom, especially the bathroom.
00:02:38
My wife has a fixation with bathrooms.
00:02:41
As If we will spend
the entire weekend in the bathroom.
00:02:44
Anyway, there were no photos.
00:02:45
So I sent the following note to the hotel.
00:02:47
"Your hotel was recommended to me.
00:02:50
I would like to make a reservation,
but there are no photos.
00:02:53
Without pictures,
I can't convince my wife."
00:02:55
Response from hotel -
00:02:57
I received this email
a while ago, but I kept it.
00:03:00
"Dear Víctor, I'm going to help you
convince your wife."
00:03:04
(Laughter)
00:03:05
It starts just like that:
00:03:07
"It's true we do not have
any pictures of the rooms,
00:03:10
because we are renovating our web page.
00:03:12
My sincerest apologies.
00:03:13
This is a small hotel, and the manager
wanted to remodel the page.
00:03:17
What can we do? He gets bored."
00:03:19
Between parenthesis there's a smile emoji.
00:03:21
"I have gone upstairs to a room
00:03:23
which I think would be perfect
for you and your kids.
00:03:26
I have taken pictures
with my personal camera
00:03:28
and attached them in this email.
00:03:30
If you wife doesn't like the rooms,
please let me know.
00:03:32
I will talk with my boss
to ask if we can change them."
00:03:35
And then in brackets she writes,
00:03:37
"Since we're reforming the web page,
we've only booked a few rooms.
00:03:40
If you need more photos, just ask.
00:03:44
It's a quick up and down,
ask and you will get photos.
00:03:48
We eagerly await your arrival.
00:03:50
At your service,
Ana, Reception Manager."
00:03:56
If you receive this email,
00:04:00
assuming you're slightly normal,
what do you think?
00:04:03
Anyone would think,
00:04:06
are you kidding me,
what planet are you from?
00:04:09
(Laughter)
00:04:11
How would an appropriate, correct
and professional email have sounded?
00:04:16
A professional, correct response
would have been:
00:04:18
"Dear client,
We are reforming the website,
00:04:21
so there are no photos,
but don't worry.
00:04:22
In two weeks, they will be on our website.
00:04:25
Yours sincerely, Ana"
00:04:26
This would have been a serious,
correct and professional response.
00:04:30
The problem is that we are surrounded
00:04:33
by people who are serious,
correct and professional.
00:04:38
Yet there are others who besides
being serious, correct and professional,
00:04:44
are extraordinary and leave us in awe.
00:04:49
(Laughter)
00:04:50
That's what we will talk about.
00:04:52
But then there are those who say,
00:04:53
"I am so fed up, really fed up
because I feel disillusioned."
00:04:58
The problem is some people
feel really lifeless.
00:05:00
It's no surprise: you read
about world crisis,
00:05:02
watch a TV program about cutbacks,
00:05:04
listen to the radio to relax
and you hear about the deficit.
00:05:07
This continues for four or five years,
plus your job may not be going well.
00:05:11
Some people also have personal problems:
00:05:13
mothers with illnesses,
couples with relationship problems,
00:05:15
teens having children,
00:05:17
those who don't support Barca Soccer.
00:05:19
So, you keep adding, adding, adding ...
00:05:21
There's just no source of joy,
and it's difficult to find happiness.
00:05:27
The truth is, many unfortunate people
are disappointed, overwhelmed,
00:05:31
coming unhinged,
really fed up about everything.
00:05:35
There's an astronomical crisis
in our state of being.
00:05:37
A crisis of "uffh"
that I'm not sure how to write.
00:05:41
The "uffh" is when we come home
from work and hear,
00:05:43
"Daddy, could you tell me a story?"
00:05:45
"Uffh ... honey, let mommy tell you ..."
00:05:48
"Hey buddy, let's grab
a drink and catch up."
00:05:50
"Uffh, you go. I have to ..."
00:05:51
This is the problem -
we go around with "uffh" energy.
00:05:54
Why is it so important
to keep your spirits up?
00:05:59
There is a formula to calculate
your value as a person.
00:06:04
How much are you worth, that's V.
00:06:06
V = (K + S) x A
00:06:07
The K is Knowledge.
00:06:09
The S is Skill.
00:06:11
Everything in life requires knowledge:
00:06:13
to serve a beer requires knowledge;
00:06:15
to work in finance, you need knowledge;
00:06:18
to be president, you need knowledge.
00:06:20
Then comes S.
00:06:21
Everything in life requires
ability and therefore skill.
00:06:25
Then comes Attitude.
00:06:27
What's the significance of this formula?
00:06:28
The importance is
that the K adds, the S adds,
00:06:32
but the A multiplies.
00:06:34
The difference
in the kind of person you are
00:06:36
is not in the K or the S but in the A.
00:06:40
You're not amazing, which you are,
because of your knowledge.
00:06:44
You're not amazing
because you have a lot of experience.
00:06:47
You are incredible for your way of being.
00:06:50
No one appreciates you for what you know,
your degrees and titles.
00:06:53
No one respects you for the years
you put into your career.
00:06:56
People appreciate you
for your way of being.
00:06:59
All charismatic people
have a charismatic way of being.
00:07:02
All the shitty people we meet
have a shitty disposition.
00:07:05
(Laughter)
00:07:06
Excuse my language ...
00:07:08
but label them as you wish.
00:07:10
All the incredible bosses
have an incredible way of behaving,
00:07:15
and all the other ones ...
you get my point.
00:07:18
If not, think of
all the bosses you've had.
00:07:20
Which would you choose?
00:07:21
I'm not saying the K and S
aren't important.
00:07:23
They are very important.
00:07:25
Nothing worse than a useless person
who's super motivated -
00:07:28
"I have no idea, but I'll do it!"
00:07:29
(Laughter)
00:07:30
Of course knowledge is important,
but we don't choose people for that.
00:07:34
We chose them for their way of being.
00:07:36
In the personal realm, it's even simpler.
00:07:38
How do we chose our friends,
for K, S or A?
00:07:41
No one chooses friends for their resume.
00:07:43
We choose them for their way of being.
00:07:45
If we ask your children,
"Who do you prefer, mom or dad?"
00:07:49
"No, my mom is amazing."
00:07:51
"Come on, tell us,
00:07:52
14 years of experience in your field."
00:07:54
(Laughter)
00:07:56
Our kids also don't define us by K or S.
00:07:58
They define us by our way of being.
00:07:59
"My mom and dad are amazing
because they love me,
00:08:02
they help me, play with me, play goalie."
00:08:04
In this way, we define people,
value them for their way of being.
00:08:08
And the problem is, when people
feel disheartened, without spirit,
00:08:11
they lose their best quality,
their way of being.
00:08:13
We don't lose awareness or experience.
00:08:15
We lose our way of being.
00:08:17
And the big problem - we are clueless.
00:08:19
Really clueless.
00:08:20
When one is clueless,
surrounded by clueless people,
00:08:23
he's not aware that he's clueless,
but we are clueless.
00:08:27
We could perform experiments
to show this, but I don't have time.
00:08:31
We live in an environment
where speed is prioritized.
00:08:36
Everything occurs at an insane pace:
we drive fast, we walk fast,
00:08:39
we talk fast, we eat fast,
we have fast meetings.
00:08:41
We want a book to change our life
in 15 minutes, in 14 it's even better.
00:08:46
You take a course in time-management,
and the first thing you learn is
00:08:49
if you wake up a half hour earlier,
you will half an advantage.
00:08:52
And you think, against whom?
00:08:54
(Laughter)
00:08:55
You are told you need to move forward
or you'll take a step back.
00:08:59
So you go through life
at lightening speed.
00:09:01
"Life is like riding a bike.
00:09:02
If you stop, you fall."
00:09:04
How often we've heard that.
00:09:05
It's time to glorify the pause,
to give value to the act of stopping
00:09:10
because when you stop, you mend.
00:09:11
They say you can't stop
while riding a bike.
00:09:13
But you must stop,
or you'll falter on your path.
00:09:16
And on a bike, sometimes
you adjust things.
00:09:18
But instead we go around like
chickens without heads.
00:09:21
I don't know if you've ever seen
a chicken with its head cut off.
00:09:24
The head falls,
00:09:25
but the chicken keeps going,
another 20, 30, 40 plus yards.
00:09:29
You wonder where it's going.
00:09:30
How many of us go through life
like chickens with no heads?
00:09:33
"Hey, where are you off to?"
00:09:34
"I'm running, I don't know ... a dinner."
00:09:37
We go around crazy,
when life has so many beautiful things.
00:09:40
Life has spectacular moments.
00:09:42
For those of us rooting for Barca Soccer,
too many spectacular moments.
00:09:46
It's hard to take in
such happiness all at once.
00:09:48
As we grow older,
00:09:50
we understand that we focus
much more on drama than on fun.
00:09:53
There are many difficult moments
we will experience
00:09:56
and those we've already experienced.
00:09:58
At times people we love
have accidents, lose their job,
00:10:01
get sick or die, often without warning.
00:10:06
And when life deals us a blow like this,
00:10:08
everything stops,
00:10:10
and you think and you realize
what is truly important
00:10:13
and what is less important.
00:10:15
At times we need to search
for this pause and reevaluate it
00:10:18
and realize that in life,
00:10:20
the most important thing
has to be the most important thing.
00:10:24
It's not a play on words -
okay, it actually is -
00:10:27
but there's a point
00:10:29
to not rush through life and miss out.
00:10:32
There are people
who go around high and euphoric
00:10:35
in their environment.
00:10:37
What can one do when one notices
00:10:39
this sensation of not doing anything,
but at full intensity.
00:10:43
Life is full of people like this.
00:10:45
It's true we all do many things
from 7 in the morning until 11 at night,
00:10:49
but it's not the same to do things
and to do important things.
00:10:53
And at times, we miss out on life
by running through it.
00:10:56
We're born, we grow up,
reproduce, struggle and die.
00:10:58
We never come to realize
how rapidly life passes.
00:11:01
What are you doing
to be going at 30,000 watts,
00:11:04
to be so revved up?
00:11:05
Those who bolt out of bed
and say, "Let's go!"
00:11:08
A guy runs by, you ask where he's going?
00:11:10
"To work!"
00:11:11
What are these people doing?
00:11:13
They are doing many things.
00:11:14
I am not an expert;
I copy from the experts.
00:11:16
But if one reads about this theme,
all the experts agree on the same points.
00:11:21
I will only mention two of them.
00:11:23
There are actually three,
00:11:25
but I saw the time,
so I need to shorten my talk.
00:11:28
Let's see what they are.
00:11:29
There are two,
00:11:30
(Laughter)
00:11:31
otherwise you'll kick me out!
00:11:32
First, and these are basic, simple.
00:11:37
Learn to be grateful.
00:11:38
There's a refrain,
00:11:39
"You don't know what you have
until it's gone."
00:11:42
This is an absolute truth.
00:11:44
We don't realize all that we have.
00:11:46
No one arrives home,
turns on the switch on the wall,
00:11:49
and when the lights go on, says,
00:11:51
"Wow, what brilliant
shining illumination!"
00:11:54
This doesn't exist. We would seem foolish.
00:11:58
You arrive home, turn on the switch,
and you already know the light will go on.
00:12:01
In life the same thing happens.
00:12:03
We take so much for granted.
00:12:05
You wake up in the morning,
00:12:07
and you are used to being
in this amazing country,
00:12:09
seeing beautiful mountains.
00:12:11
You are used to waking up
with your love by your side,
00:12:14
having fantastic children,
good health and employment.
00:12:17
At times we need to stop
and value these things
00:12:19
because we would end up much happier.
00:12:21
It's true, life has dramas, epic dramas:
00:12:25
deaths, terminal or incurable illnesses.
00:12:29
When someone over 45 loses a job,
00:12:32
has no prospect of returning
to the labor force,
00:12:35
has two children at home ...
00:12:36
Yes, life has dramas.
00:12:38
And unfortunately,
the dramas don't have a solution.
00:12:42
You just have to live through them.
00:12:44
Time eases the pain,
but there's no solution to the dramas.
00:12:49
What's unforgivable is complaining
when you have no dramas.
00:12:54
Those of us without dramas
should be here to
00:12:56
(1) serve those
who are suffering with dramas,
00:12:59
(2) be grateful.
00:13:00
The least we can do is to be appreciative
and value the things that are going well,
00:13:04
and not focus only on what's lacking.
00:13:06
We should be running with joy.
00:13:08
Everyone in Andorra
00:13:09
should be running with joy
living in this country,
00:13:11
and yet you see people with no joy.
00:13:15
You see the opposite: people looking
so down you have to ask why.
00:13:18
You are compelled to ask,
"What happened, what's with that face?"
00:13:22
"You must have passed through
something really horrible!"
00:13:25
Yet if we stop to ask, people give
the most bizarre explanations.
00:13:28
"Well, everyone traded in their iPhone
for the newest iPhone 5 except me.
00:13:32
I'm stuck with the 4."
00:13:33
"Oh wow, that's really
a world-class problem!"
00:13:36
"And you, what about you?"
00:13:37
"Well, I wanted a window seat,
and I got an aisle."
00:13:40
At times one has to be aware
that in one's bubble,
00:13:43
we convert our biggest issue
into a world-class problem.
00:13:47
You have to see things relatively.
00:13:49
Life has dramas.
00:13:50
When one doesn't have dramas,
there are no problems.
00:13:54
There are only circumstances to resolve.
00:13:56
And when this is the case,
one doesn't have the right to be unhappy.
00:14:00
It's a matter of justice and fairness.
00:14:02
The day you feel overwhelmed,
take out a paper and pen,
00:14:06
and start writing 20 things
that are fantastic in your life.
00:14:08
We all have 20 fantastic
things in our lives.
00:14:11
We also have 20 or 30 problems,
00:14:13
but the mind always thinks of the problems
00:14:15
because the rational brain
is designed for this.
00:14:17
You have to get the brain to focus
on the good things in life.
00:14:20
Make the list. It's very simple.
00:14:22
Because life is very simple,
not easy but simple.
00:14:27
We love to complicate everything.
00:14:29
Make the list. Try it!
00:14:31
Those supporting Barca Soccer,
the first five are:
00:14:33
Messi, Messi, Messi, Messi, Messi!
00:14:35
(Laughter)
00:14:36
We have Messi!
00:14:37
It's so huge we can't even process it.
00:14:39
We have Messi!
00:14:41
The league is second. We have Messi!
00:14:43
Is your mother healthy?
00:14:45
You don't know what you have.
00:14:46
Live in this amazing country?
00:14:48
You don't know what you have.
00:14:49
Have a partner who tolerates you?
00:14:51
You don't know what you have.
00:14:52
Have great kids?
00:14:53
You don't know what you have.
00:14:54
You need to make the list to realize,
"Wow, we're actually doing well!"
00:14:58
Not everything is bad.
00:15:00
And second, you need to have illusions.
00:15:02
Human beings work with illusion.
00:15:03
There is nothing like having illusions.
00:15:05
Becoming a parent, getting a new car,
going on a vacation.
00:15:09
You become excited to have an experience.
00:15:11
The problem is when
you don't have illusions, you're dead.
00:15:14
If you don't have illusions,
you need to get them,
00:15:18
because your environment
won't create them for you.
00:15:21
If it's cold, cover yourself up.
00:15:23
If you're constipated, take medicine.
00:15:25
Your environment brings you down?
00:15:28
Then you need to create illusions.
00:15:32
If you broke your watch
because you rushed around,
00:15:34
only two minutes are left now
instead of five.
00:15:37
People say: "Give me a million dollars.
00:15:39
You'll see how many illusions I'll have."
00:15:41
But the best things in life
are almost free.
00:15:44
The best things are almost free:
00:15:46
a loving squeeze from the person
next to you - this is free -
00:15:50
climbing up Casamanya mountain,
during a full moon,
00:15:53
eating the local favorite
tuna sandwich - that's free.
00:15:57
It's not about doing extraordinary things.
00:15:59
It's about enjoying small ordinary things:
00:16:01
the sacred 20 minutes
while you're having breakfast:
00:16:04
coffee with milk and a cheese sandwich,
the sports page - that's happiness.
00:16:08
Whichever sport page you choose,
that's more or less happiness.
00:16:11
And there are people choking
on that cheese sandwich
00:16:13
because they are looking
at bills and debts,
00:16:16
and you want to say, "Give me a break!"
00:16:18
Or for those of us who enjoy a beer,
00:16:20
there's no greater pleasure than
having a beer when you're in the mood.
00:16:24
There are people who enjoy a beer
from 100 feet away,
00:16:27
who call out to the waiter
carrying the tray,
00:16:29
"Ooh that's mine. Sure looks good!"
00:16:32
And the waiter brings the beer
and places it on the table.
00:16:35
At first they enjoy the beer
without touching it, just observing it,
00:16:39
the creamy foam, the bubbles floating up,
00:16:42
the liquid falling down the sides
of the cool glass.
00:16:45
Excuse me, but you could shed a tear
of emotion just looking at a beer.
00:16:48
And when you pick it up,
that cool sensation runs through your arm,
00:16:52
and the first sip is always the longest,
00:16:55
the cool sensation,
the foamy mustache it leaves behind ...
00:16:59
This is happiness; this is joy.
00:17:03
A beer costs two euros.
00:17:05
At the next table,
a guy guzzles down two beers,
00:17:08
faces away from the mountain view,
00:17:09
ranting, complaining.
00:17:11
You don't have to be naive,
00:17:12
but you don't have to listen
24 hours a day
00:17:15
to news and radio
on economic crises and problems.
00:17:19
You have to try.
00:17:20
If you don't, there's no way to feel good.
00:17:23
The end.
00:17:24
Now I will tell you something
my wife won't be happy about.
00:17:27
She said she would be watching,
00:17:28
so I'm sorry.
00:17:29
(Laughter)
00:17:30
I love to play cards with my wife,
the game Brisca.
00:17:36
My wife is of Nordic
background, very Nordic.
00:17:38
Nordic people have a region of the brain
that functions in a different way,
00:17:42
not better or worse - different.
00:17:45
At times we're dealing the cards,
00:17:47
my wife picks up her cards and says,
"Uff, shuffle them again."
00:17:50
"Come on, sweetie!"
00:17:51
"No, I have no trumps,
only low value cards.
00:17:53
Reshuffle."
00:17:54
"But that's cheating!"
00:17:56
"Reshuffle, or I won't play!"
00:17:57
(Laughter)
00:17:58
So I reshuffle and ask, "And now?"
00:18:01
"Now it's better."
00:18:02
"Ok honey, who goes first,
you decide as always, dear."
00:18:06
Sometimes while we're playing,
she draws a card and says,
00:18:08
"I got the gold card,
but I'm returning it to the pile
00:18:11
since it's not a good card for me now."
00:18:13
Well this is how my wife plays cards.
00:18:15
If you like it, great.
00:18:18
If not, you've been warned.
00:18:19
She's always played this way.
00:18:21
She doesn't get why,
but logically she always wins,
00:18:24
because she is Swedish, she's not stupid.
00:18:27
(Laughter)
00:18:28
How many people from Andorra,
Catalonia or Holland
00:18:32
have a Swedish gene in them?
00:18:35
One has to understand,
in life, like it or not,
00:18:39
things are as they are,
not as we wish they were.
00:18:41
We don't get to pick our cards;
God deals them out.
00:18:45
And we fall, but we keep playing.
00:18:49
Greatness is achieved through playing.
00:18:52
It's what separates the exceptional
from the mediocre.
00:18:54
We can never, ever, ever, do anything
to change our circumstances.
00:18:58
We can never ever, ever return
the hand we are dealt.
00:19:01
Whoever chose to have
a crisis or an illness?
00:19:04
But we can always, always, always
choose our attitude.
00:19:09
This is the last freedom
that we have as human beings.
00:19:11
Our environment and our particular
set of circumstances influence us,
00:19:16
but there's always a small space
where we can choose our attitude
00:19:19
and how to confront our situation.
00:19:21
It's what separates the brilliant ones
from those who are burnt out.
00:19:24
In every moment, we choose our attitude.
00:19:26
For this reason, each moment
brings us a little closer to greatness
00:19:29
or a little closer to mediocrity.
00:19:31
And the only objective in life
is to add up these fantastic moments,
00:19:35
to fight each day to be the best person
you can become given your circumstances.
00:19:39
So in the end of your life
when you look back on your journey,
00:19:42
let it be a work of art
so that others receive your masterpiece
00:19:46
and say, "Wow, wow, wow."
00:19:49
Thank you.
00:19:51
(Applause)
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