The 4 Weapons Women Use Against Each Other | Oprah's Lifeclass | Oprah Winfrey Network

00:03:47
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DgXc4lttJWk

Summary

TLDRThe video addresses the issue of how women mistreat each other, focusing on behaviors such as gossip, betrayal, and unhealthy competition. It suggests that societal conditioning leads women to feel threatened by each other's success, resulting in negative interactions. The speaker encourages women to recognize these patterns and emphasizes the importance of healing and supporting one another. The discussion highlights the need for open communication and understanding to foster healthier relationships among women.

Takeaways

  • 🤝 Women often betray each other's confidences.
  • 🗣️ Gossip is a common way women hurt one another.
  • ❌ Lying and withholding information damages trust.
  • 🏆 Unhealthy competition can lead to negative behaviors.
  • 💔 Many women have experienced betrayal from other women.
  • 🧠 Societal conditioning influences women's behavior.
  • 💬 Open communication is key to healing.
  • 🌱 Healing is necessary for positive relationships.
  • 👭 Supporting each other can break the cycle of mistreatment.
  • 🔄 Recognizing harmful patterns is the first step to change.

Timeline

  • 00:00:00 - 00:03:47

    In this segment, the discussion focuses on the mistreatment of women towards each other, highlighting the reasons behind such behavior. The speaker emphasizes that women often feel threatened by each other's success due to a conditioned belief that there is not enough success to go around. This mindset leads to competition, gossip, and betrayal among women. The speaker points out that these behaviors stem from a desire to please others while also fulfilling their own needs, which can result in undermining other women. The segment concludes with a call for healing and self-reflection on these harmful behaviors.

Mind Map

Video Q&A

  • What are the main ways women hurt each other?

    Women hurt each other through betrayal, gossip, lying, and unhealthy competition.

  • Why do women compete with each other?

    Women often feel that if one succeeds, it threatens their own success due to societal conditioning.

  • How does betrayal manifest among women?

    Betrayal can occur when confidences are shared with others instead of directly addressing the person involved.

  • What is the impact of gossip among women?

    Gossip can lead to misunderstandings and hurt feelings, as it often involves discussing someone behind their back.

  • Is competition among women always negative?

    Not all competition is negative, but unhealthy competition can lead to harmful behaviors.

  • What is the significance of healing in this context?

    Healing is important for women to overcome negative patterns and support each other positively.

  • How can women support each other better?

    By fostering open communication and celebrating each other's successes instead of competing.

  • What role does societal conditioning play in women's behavior?

    Societal conditioning can lead women to feel insecure and competitive, impacting their relationships.

  • What is a third-party conversation?

    A third-party conversation occurs when someone discusses another person with others instead of addressing the individual directly.

  • How can women break the cycle of mistreatment?

    By recognizing their behaviors and actively choosing to support and uplift one another.

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  • 00:00:00
    [Music]
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    what we're talking about in tonight's
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    life class every woman call your friend
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    and those who are not is how women
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    mistreat each other so the few men who
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    are here today just hold on because
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    you'll you're GNA get some secret
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    information it's why women treat each
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    other the way we do the way we we
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    dishonor each other and more importantly
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    why we do it we got gossip and we lie
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    and we compete now men compete but why
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    is it different how is it different
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    because I think very often as women we
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    are conditioned and programmed to
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    believe that if you get yours there
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    won't be enough for me or that if you
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    get yours I won't
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    get and men don't think like that men is
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    like if I get mine I ain't worried about
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    you okay that's
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    right but this is interesting because I
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    say this to I say this to my girls at
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    school all the time I think that that is
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    the that is the
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    message of and program of oppressed
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    people absolutely absolutely because
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    when you have been raised in an
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    environment where you are accustomed to
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    success and you're accustomed to
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    Excellence then that's what you expect
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    of yourself and you expect it of other
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    people but if you have not been when
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    other people become successful it makes
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    you feel threatened and challenged and
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    and also because we have a chip in our
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    hard drive as women that you know leads
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    us to be people Pleasers yes so we're
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    thinking how can I please people and
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    please me too so that if I'm pleasing me
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    the program says that I'm taking
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    something away from you so the best
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    thing for me to do is to get rid of you
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    in some form or fashion yes so that I
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    can have what I need it's how many
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    people in here know what we're talking
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    about women raise your hand how many has
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    there anybody in here been betrayed
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    gossiped about or lied on by another
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    woman yeah another woman another woman
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    yeah another woman wow okay I can
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    honestly say that the meanest things
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    that have ever happened to me came from
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    other women yeah it it is true okay so
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    let's make it very clear for tonight's
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    class give us the main ways that women
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    hurt each other let's talk about that we
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    betray one another betrayal our
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    confidences you tell me and then I tell
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    50 other people or you tell me and then
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    30 seconds it's on Twitter Facebook we
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    betray one another starts in middle
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    school we gossip what I call third party
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    conversations instead of telling you
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    your butt too big I'm telling Mary and
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    Shaquita and Nancy you understand and
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    here you are sitting in front of me with
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    the dress too short the butt too big and
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    I ain't said nothing to you okay that's
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    a third party conversation the other
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    thing we do is we lie to one another we
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    withhold information or we change and
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    shift information okay we lie and the
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    other thing that we do we talked about
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    is we compete we compete if you get
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    yours is not enough for me we got to
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    learn but isn't healthy competition good
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    I'm not talking about healthy
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    competition that you learn in the
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    leadership academy okay I'm talking
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    about I'mma take you down let's come
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    back and talk about why we do it so
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    those are the four main ways everybody
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    familiar with that right you've
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    experienced it or been a part of it
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    yourself here comes some healing I feel
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    it hold my hand here comes some healing
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    okay have you ever done
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    it that's what we got to heal
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    H let us heal ourselves
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    [Music]
Tags
  • women
  • gossip
  • betrayal
  • competition
  • healing
  • support
  • societal conditioning
  • communication
  • relationships
  • negativity