How to challenge your negative self-talk | Josh Green | TEDxSurrey

00:11:45
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JkB7hJan0Q0

Ringkasan

TLDRThe speaker articulates a journey of overcoming internalized negative self-talk and pushing past perceived inadequacies. He recounts his experience of attempting to juggle for a theatrical audition, despite limited experience, and the subsequent lesson that societal and personal doubts can be transformed into strengths. By sharing how he persevered when faced with rejection and uncertainty, he suggests practice, accepting help from others, and showing up as key strategies to overcome adversity and achieve success. He concludes by encouraging others to embrace fear and opportunities, as doing so led him to a fulfilling career and life experiences.

Takeaways

  • 🎭 Embrace failure as a stepping stone.
  • 🤹‍♂️ Learn new skills to open doors.
  • 💬 Ignore negative voices.
  • 🗣 Rely on support from others.
  • 📈 Practice makes progress.
  • 🚪 Opportunities require showing up.
  • 🌟 Success often follows rejection.
  • 😌 Stay calm in challenging situations.
  • 👥 Surround yourself with talent.
  • 💪 Face challenges head-on.

Garis waktu

  • 00:00:00 - 00:05:00

    The speaker begins by recounting an embarrassing moment tied to juggling which led to a profound realization. As a child, the speaker dreamed of becoming an actor, shielded from negative voices that would eventually lower self-esteem. In pursuing acting, they encountered negativity but decided to start in the safer realm of background acting. An unexpected audition opportunity as a juggler arose despite not knowing how to juggle. With the help of a friend, the speaker quickly learned basic juggling by the audition day. Despite feeling inadequate and out of place among professional jugglers, the speaker persisted, went through the audition, and surprisingly landed the part, listed humorously as 'stupid jester' in the script.

  • 00:05:00 - 00:11:45

    The speaker reflects on internal discoveries made from this experience, emphasizing that negative voices are not one's own but implanted by others. Even casting directors and interviewers grapple with insecurities. Originality can stand out in a sea of sameness, leading to unexpected opportunities. Practice, safety, and showing up are key to overcoming internal negativity. Asking for help and leveraging the skills of talented acquaintances plays a significant role in personal growth. Persistence eventually silences the negative voices, leading to a rich life filled with unexpected accomplishments. Embracing discomfort and rejecting the voices that say 'not good enough' are critical to personal and professional growth. The tale concludes with encouragement to seize opportunities and challenge self-doubt, framed by the speaker's initial lesson—that dropping the ball was paradoxically beneficial.

Peta Pikiran

Video Tanya Jawab

  • What does the speaker's story involve?

    The speaker shares a story about learning to juggle for a theatrical audition and how failing led to success.

  • What revelation did the speaker have?

    The speaker realized that negative voices often stem from external influences, and they can be managed by showing up and embracing challenges.

  • How did the speaker learn to juggle?

    The speaker learned by practicing with a friend who was skilled in juggling.

  • Why does the speaker emphasize showing up?

    Showing up is crucial because it means taking opportunities and seeing where they might lead, despite fears of inadequacy.

  • What lesson does the speaker draw from failing?

    Failure can lead to unexpected success and is a natural part of trying new things.

  • What role did others play in the speaker's journey?

    The speaker relied on a friend to learn juggling and emphasizes the importance of having supportive people around.

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Teks
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Gulir Otomatis:
  • 00:00:01
    [Music]
  • 00:00:07
    [Applause]
  • 00:00:13
    hello
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    everyone this probably just looks like
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    regular old juggling to you and that's
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    because it
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    is but it's in dropping the ball that I
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    made such a profound Discovery during
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    what I thought was one of the worst and
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    most embarrassing moments of my life you
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    see when I was little I wanted nothing
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    more than to be an actor when I grew up
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    because the weight of the world hadn't
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    yet crushed my
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    spirit I hadn't heard no enough hadn't
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    heard that I was too small too short too
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    fat too stupid hadn't heard that I was
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    not smart enough or not fast enough or
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    simply not good enough and because I
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    hadn't heard some of this until much
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    later in my life I started the journey
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    joury of getting myself an
  • 00:01:01
    agent it was actually through that
  • 00:01:03
    process that I started to hear some of
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    those more negative comments you're not
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    ready you're not the right look you're
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    just not good enough and I started to
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    internalize this unfortunately so I had
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    to start in the safest place I got
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    myself a background agent which required
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    nothing more of me than to stand still
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    in the background kind of like the child
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    that plays the tree in the school
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    play just happy to be on the team
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    one day though my agent did call me with
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    my very first audition no more tree for
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    me she calls me and she says hey you can
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    juggle right to which I respond yes of
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    course great your audition's tomorrow
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    9:00 a.m. sharp toodles my agent loved
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    to say
  • 00:01:51
    toodles now I'd like to make something
  • 00:01:54
    abundantly clear at that point in my
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    life I didn't know how to juggle
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    like at all so I did what anyone would
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    do in a situation like that I call my
  • 00:02:05
    friend Adam who does I show up at his
  • 00:02:07
    house at 5:00 p.m. at night and he
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    starts me off with scarves slow moving
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    juggling scarves so my body has time to
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    figure out what it's doing then he
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    upgrades me to my first
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    ball then two and finally three and by
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    the end of the night I'm able to juggle
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    for about 5
  • 00:02:25
    Seconds it doesn't look pretty and I
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    make a lot of strange focused faces as
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    I'm doing it but you can technically
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    call it
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    juggling the next day I show up at the
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    audition on time and it is packed with
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    professional jugglers clowns and
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    magicians all who are nonchalantly
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    carrying on full conversations with
  • 00:02:46
    juggling six balls at the same time
  • 00:02:49
    they're bouncing them off the walls
  • 00:02:50
    they're so good and I'm just in awe
  • 00:02:53
    staring at my borrow juggling
  • 00:02:55
    balls and income these
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    voices you are not not good
  • 00:03:01
    enough you don't belong
  • 00:03:04
    here all I want to do in this moment is
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    disappear and make sure I don't
  • 00:03:09
    embarrass myself or my agent so badly
  • 00:03:11
    that I'm never able to work in this town
  • 00:03:13
    again but I take a deep
  • 00:03:16
    breath remember that I have a whole 5
  • 00:03:18
    Seconds of juggling under my
  • 00:03:20
    belt and I sit
  • 00:03:22
    down and then I hear it Josh Josh Green
  • 00:03:26
    you're
  • 00:03:28
    up on the inside
  • 00:03:30
    such Grace and confidence on the outside
  • 00:03:32
    even though clearly sweating through my
  • 00:03:36
    shirt I walk into the audition room
  • 00:03:39
    introduce myself to the casting
  • 00:03:40
    directors and wait for them to call
  • 00:03:43
    Action I start juggling I've got my
  • 00:03:46
    struggle face on I'm biting my tongue in
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    Fierce concentration and I'm moving all
  • 00:03:51
    over the place I'm about to reach my
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    5-second juggling limit and they they
  • 00:03:56
    haven't stopped me
  • 00:03:58
    yet why haven't they stopped
  • 00:04:02
    me then it happens I drop the ball at
  • 00:04:07
    this point my face couldn't look
  • 00:04:09
    sillier I'm staring at them they're
  • 00:04:12
    staring at me I don't know what to do so
  • 00:04:14
    I just pick the ball up and continue
  • 00:04:16
    juggling as if nothing ever happened
  • 00:04:18
    trying to smile through my struggle
  • 00:04:23
    face they stopped me immediately that's
  • 00:04:26
    thank you that's enough next o
  • 00:04:30
    and income those voices again I told you
  • 00:04:32
    you weren't good enough you blew
  • 00:04:35
    it the next day my agent calls me asking
  • 00:04:39
    me how I thought it
  • 00:04:42
    went I tell her that I gave it my best
  • 00:04:44
    shot and we'll get him next time then I
  • 00:04:46
    thought she was going to give me a
  • 00:04:47
    little bit of feedback but instead she
  • 00:04:49
    says you nailed it you got the part wait
  • 00:04:54
    what so she emails me the script with
  • 00:04:57
    the name of my character at the top of
  • 00:04:59
    the page and in bold letters it says
  • 00:05:01
    stupid
  • 00:05:06
    [Applause]
  • 00:05:15
    Jester in sharing this story with you
  • 00:05:18
    you got a really good look of what was
  • 00:05:19
    going on for me externally but I'd love
  • 00:05:22
    to dig into the discoveries I made
  • 00:05:24
    internally to help me navigate some of
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    those really negative voices the first
  • 00:05:28
    one those voices they're not your voices
  • 00:05:32
    no child is born thinking they're not
  • 00:05:35
    enough the voices we hang on to tend to
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    come from a select few people in our
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    lives a teacher a parent a bully a
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    partner they start on the outside and
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    they slowly move inside but they're not
  • 00:05:47
    our voices they're somebody else's and
  • 00:05:50
    we don't have to listen to them and
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    guess what the casting directors have
  • 00:05:55
    those voices too they were given so much
  • 00:05:57
    information from so many people just
  • 00:05:59
    saying they needed somebody who could
  • 00:06:01
    juggle they also have superiors so
  • 00:06:03
    they're wondering am I doing a good job
  • 00:06:05
    am I getting the right person the person
  • 00:06:08
    interviewing you probably feels this way
  • 00:06:10
    your date might feel that way as well no
  • 00:06:13
    one really knows exactly what they're
  • 00:06:15
    looking for which is why Steve Jobs so
  • 00:06:17
    famously said nobody knows what they
  • 00:06:19
    want until you give it to them which is
  • 00:06:22
    why after a long day of amazing jugglers
  • 00:06:25
    all pretty much doing the exact same
  • 00:06:26
    thing being amazing I walked in
  • 00:06:30
    looked like an idiot to which they
  • 00:06:33
    responded oh my gosh this guy's
  • 00:06:38
    perfect another Discovery I made was
  • 00:06:42
    practice I did not just show up to my
  • 00:06:44
    first audition overcome my negative
  • 00:06:46
    thoughts and Bam I lived happily ever
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    after no no no no no I practiced I
  • 00:06:52
    started safe and small I started as a
  • 00:06:55
    background performer all I had to do was
  • 00:06:58
    walk around in the background and make
  • 00:06:59
    it look so uninteresting that it didn't
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    draw anyone's attention what's the
  • 00:07:04
    safest place that you could start what's
  • 00:07:06
    your version of background performer
  • 00:07:08
    because once you start it builds
  • 00:07:10
    momentum that can't be stopped but you
  • 00:07:13
    do have to start you also have to show
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    up I had so many chances to turn down my
  • 00:07:20
    juggling opportunity I could have told
  • 00:07:22
    my agent that I didn't know how I could
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    have just not gone to the
  • 00:07:26
    audition and I could have just left when
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    I saw all the amazingly talented
  • 00:07:30
    jugglers that were there but I stayed in
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    spite of the voices that said I wasn't
  • 00:07:35
    good enough and I showed up because I
  • 00:07:37
    could have been exactly what they were
  • 00:07:38
    looking for and I
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    was had I not gone though the show would
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    have gone on without me they would have
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    cast another juggler into the role and
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    I'm sure it would have been fine but
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    that means somebody else would be living
  • 00:07:51
    my life right
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    now ask
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    yourselves how many people are living
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    your best life right now CU you turned
  • 00:07:58
    down an opport
  • 00:08:02
    so say yes to Opportunities show
  • 00:08:05
    up you probably also notice that I
  • 00:08:07
    didn't do this by
  • 00:08:09
    myself though I didn't know how to
  • 00:08:11
    juggle I did know someone who did
  • 00:08:14
    surrounding myself with extremely
  • 00:08:15
    talented people who know more than me
  • 00:08:17
    and think highly of me has always been
  • 00:08:19
    so helpful at helping me expand my
  • 00:08:21
    horizons or in this particular instance
  • 00:08:24
    growing me out of a
  • 00:08:26
    pinch think of all the people you have
  • 00:08:28
    in your life and what they could show
  • 00:08:30
    you if you just called them and said
  • 00:08:31
    heyy can you teach me how to play guitar
  • 00:08:34
    or how to
  • 00:08:35
    swim or I don't know whatever a project
  • 00:08:39
    manager does I don't
  • 00:08:43
    know one of the most painful discoveries
  • 00:08:45
    I made during all this was that it's not
  • 00:08:47
    all rainbows and sunshine there is a
  • 00:08:50
    harsh truth that I had to get through
  • 00:08:52
    books and movies tend to skip over these
  • 00:08:54
    parts but the truth is I was a
  • 00:08:56
    background performer for over 2 years
  • 00:08:58
    before I even got my first audition the
  • 00:09:00
    voices were very loud back then
  • 00:09:02
    extremely cemented and
  • 00:09:04
    internalized after that I only landed
  • 00:09:06
    one in every 30
  • 00:09:08
    auditions one in every 50 jokes got a
  • 00:09:11
    laugh while I was on stage and I failed
  • 00:09:13
    more businesses than I care to remember
  • 00:09:16
    this is why it's so important to start
  • 00:09:18
    Safe Keep practicing continue to show up
  • 00:09:22
    and have the support of others because
  • 00:09:24
    all of these proactive actions over time
  • 00:09:28
    help to silence those negative voices it
  • 00:09:30
    pushes them further away and it all
  • 00:09:33
    leads to a much more fulfilling life
  • 00:09:36
    saying yes to acting led to a wonderful
  • 00:09:38
    and fulfilling acting career saying yes
  • 00:09:40
    also led to a comedy career that allows
  • 00:09:42
    me to travel the
  • 00:09:44
    country it allowed me to be on the
  • 00:09:46
    bottom of the ocean on just one breath
  • 00:09:48
    for over two
  • 00:09:49
    minutes it allowed me to save a human
  • 00:09:52
    life that was pretty
  • 00:09:53
    cool and to doing my very first
  • 00:09:58
    tedex
  • 00:10:06
    all of this because I embrace the
  • 00:10:08
    moments when those voices arise so look
  • 00:10:12
    I know that the Unseen life is a scary
  • 00:10:14
    life so we tend to stick to what's safe
  • 00:10:17
    because it keeps those voices quiet when
  • 00:10:20
    I took on 5 hours of juggling to do my
  • 00:10:22
    first audition I kept hearing no way
  • 00:10:25
    you're going to be good
  • 00:10:26
    enough but rather than shy away from
  • 00:10:28
    that I amra Ed the part of me that felt
  • 00:10:30
    like I couldn't do it and said why
  • 00:10:31
    wouldn't I be good
  • 00:10:33
    enough I practiced I showed up and I
  • 00:10:36
    took my place and I encourage you to do
  • 00:10:38
    the same because when you hear that
  • 00:10:40
    voice that says you're not good enough
  • 00:10:43
    that just means you're doing something
  • 00:10:44
    right it means you're embracing The
  • 00:10:47
    Human Experience and pushing yourself
  • 00:10:49
    just beyond your
  • 00:10:51
    Edge so let's be honest dropping the
  • 00:10:53
    ball does not sound like a good
  • 00:10:56
    idea but it's one of the best things
  • 00:10:58
    that ever happened to me me so the next
  • 00:11:01
    time opportunity comes your way and you
  • 00:11:03
    hear that voice saying you're not good
  • 00:11:04
    enough don't drop the ball I encourage
  • 00:11:07
    you to do the exact
  • 00:11:10
    opposite thank
  • 00:11:28
    you
  • 00:11:31
    [Applause]
  • 00:11:32
    [Music]
  • 00:11:44
    w
Tags
  • self-doubt
  • perseverance
  • juggling
  • audition
  • practice
  • support
  • opportunity
  • failure
  • confidence
  • personal growth