Table Manners - Ultimate How-To Guide To Proper Dining Etiquette For Adults & Children

00:18:35
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SQvV4SNeH-U

概要

TLDRDenne videoen fra Gentleman's Gazette gir en omfattende guide til bordmanerer, med fokus på viktigheten av gode skikker ved middagsbordet. Gode bordmanerer reflekterer din sosiale kompetanse og kan til og med påvirke jobbmuligheter. Videoen tar for seg hvordan man setter seg til bords, korrekt bruk av bestikk, og høflighet mot verten og andre gjester. Man oppfordres til å vente med å spise til alle er servert, samt å bruke serveringsbestikk. Det diskuteres også ulike spise- og drikkeskikker, samt hvordan oppføre seg generelt for å ha en behagelig middag med gode samtaler.

収穫

  • 🍽️ Bordmanerer viser respekt for verten og gjestene.
  • 📱 Slå av telefonen og fokuser på selskapet.
  • ⏳ Vent med å spise til alle er servert.
  • 🍞 Pass maten fra venstre til høyre.
  • 🔪 Bruk riktig bestikk til restauranter.
  • 🍷 Toast når verten løfter glasset.
  • 👂 Lytt og oppretthold god samtale.
  • 🧂 Ikke salt maten før du har smakt.
  • 🙋‍♂️ Unngå å kritisere andres bordmanerer.
  • 👔 Vær oppmerksom på kroppsspråk og holdning.

タイムライン

  • 00:00:00 - 00:05:00

    Videoen begynner med en introduksjon til bordmanerer og deres betydning for sosialt samvær og ansettelsesprosesser. Det understrekes at gode bordmanerer reflekterer ens karakter og respekt for verten og andre gjester. Man oppfordres til å lære disse manerene, som kan være avgjørende for karrierevekst og sosiale interaksjoner.

  • 00:05:00 - 00:10:00

    Bordmanerer inkluderer handlinger i spisesituasjoner, fra det øyeblikket man kommer til bordet. Det anbefales å skru av telefonen og vente på å bli vist til sete. Plassinnstillingen forklares, med fokus på hvordan man bruker bestikket, og viktigheten av å følge reglene i uformelle så vel som formelle settinger.

  • 00:10:00 - 00:18:35

    Under måltidet er det viktig å vente med å spise til alle er servert, og bruk av bestikk gjøres i henhold til enten den amerikanske eller kontinentale metoden. Det betones også viktigheten av å skape en behagelig atmosfære ved å ha god samtale, moderat spisehastighet, og unngå dårlige vaner som å snakke med mat i munnen.

マインドマップ

ビデオQ&A

  • Hvorfor er bordmanerer viktige?

    Bordmanerer viser respekt for verten og spisepartnerne, og de kan påvirke inntrykket andre får av deg.

  • Hva bør jeg gjøre med telefonen under middagen?

    Slå av ringen på telefonen og legg den bort, slik at du unngår distraksjoner.

  • Når kan jeg begynne å spise?

    Vent til alle har fått maten og verten begynner å spise.

  • Hvordan skal jeg begynne å servere？

    Pass maten rundt bordet fra venstre til høyre og bruk serveringsbestikk.

  • Hva er de to hovedmetodene for å spise med bestikk?

    Den amerikanske metoden (zigzag) og den kontinentale metoden.

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  • 00:00:00
    Welcome back to the Gentleman's Gazette.
  • 00:00:01
    Today's video is all about table manners.
  • 00:00:03
    We provide you with the ultimate guide to the basic dining etiquette so you don't embarrass
  • 00:00:08
    yourself and get ahead in life.
  • 00:00:14
    This is part 1 of an ongoing series about etiquette so please check out the other videos
  • 00:00:22
    in our playlist.
  • 00:00:23
    Table manners are actually something your parents taught you but are actually far more
  • 00:00:27
    important as an adult.
  • 00:00:28
    First of all, your table manners speak volumes about your refinement and it's often interpreted
  • 00:00:34
    as a sign of character.
  • 00:00:35
    It's not at all about being snobby or showing off but much rather to show respect, your
  • 00:00:40
    host and your dining partners will greatly appreciate your manners.
  • 00:00:44
    Good table manners are Proof of your social skills and because of that, they are often
  • 00:00:48
    part of an interview process for higher-end positions or people where you have a lot of
  • 00:00:53
    client contact.
  • 00:00:55
    Just the other day, I talked to an entrepreneur, he only hires people after he had lunch, dinner,
  • 00:01:01
    and a drink with them because he wants to see how they react in different situations.
  • 00:01:06
    Without proper manners, he won't get the job that's for sure.
  • 00:01:11
    Table manners also help you so you don't embarrass yourself or otherwise draw any kind of negative
  • 00:01:15
    attention to you.
  • 00:01:16
    Last but not the least, Table manners make other people feel comfortable in your presence
  • 00:01:21
    and therefore help to keep up the flow of conversation and entertainment which is the
  • 00:01:26
    main part of dining together with other people.
  • 00:01:29
    It's very important to keep in mind, proper table manners aways help you and never hurt
  • 00:01:35
    you.
  • 00:01:36
    The good thing is they can be learned and its never too late to do so.
  • 00:01:39
    So what are table manners?
  • 00:01:40
    Basically, they are reactions and the behavior at the dining table.
  • 00:01:44
    In this day and age, you encounter a lot of informal dining Situations, but that never
  • 00:01:49
    means that table manners are not required or appropriate.
  • 00:01:53
    For example, a bbq should never be an excuse to chew with your mouth open and make noises
  • 00:01:57
    like a pig.
  • 00:01:58
    After all, we're all civilized people.
  • 00:02:00
    The rules do's and don'ts we discuss in the video today apply to every basic dining situation
  • 00:02:07
    out there that involves silverware.
  • 00:02:09
    For more in-depth situations, about very formal dinners with multiple courses with lots of
  • 00:02:14
    silver and glassware stay tuned for another video.
  • 00:02:17
    Also, before you can sit down at the dining table, Usually there's an invitation, there's
  • 00:02:21
    an rsvp, there's a gift, and we cover all of the before and the after in our etiquette
  • 00:02:27
    rules in a different video.
  • 00:02:29
    Let's focus and what happens when you sit down at the dinner table.
  • 00:02:31
    I suggest you turn your cell phone ringer off when you enter someone else's home and
  • 00:02:36
    put your phone in your pocket when you're with the guests.
  • 00:02:40
    Don't leave your phone on the table because you are much more likely to pick it up and
  • 00:02:44
    look at it which is impolite In the presence of other people.
  • 00:02:46
    If the table is all set, you don't just walk in and sit down.
  • 00:02:50
    Wait to be seated or wait for the queue of the host, or if they sit, you can sit as well.
  • 00:02:56
    Ideally, want to sit up straight but comfortably, don't slouch, or cross your arms, or sit as
  • 00:03:04
    you would on your couch while watching a football game.
  • 00:03:07
    Don't expect to sit next to your partner and follow the lead of the hosts.
  • 00:03:12
    Traditionally, couples were always mixed up to sit with different people; oftentimes,
  • 00:03:16
    man, woman, man, woman, just so you would create an interesting way to stimulate conversation.
  • 00:03:23
    If there's a napkin on the plate or next to a plate, put it on your lap right away.
  • 00:03:28
    If the host or hostess wants to say grace, accept the gesture for what it is and move
  • 00:03:34
    along.
  • 00:03:35
    At the same time, do not offer to say grace yourself because people may not be religious
  • 00:03:38
    at all.
  • 00:03:39
    Two, let's take a look at the place setting.
  • 00:03:41
    In the Western world, an informal place will always have at least a plate, a knife, and
  • 00:03:47
    a fork.
  • 00:03:48
    If dessert will be served, you'll find either a little fork or a spoon on the top side of
  • 00:03:53
    the plate.
  • 00:03:54
    If soup is served or anything else that requires a spoon, you will also have a spoon.
  • 00:03:58
    At more formal dinners, place settings can be a lot more elaborate with several sets
  • 00:04:03
    of silverware and a general rule of thumb is to always work your way from the outside
  • 00:04:08
    in but we'll talk much more about that in our formal dining guide video take a look
  • 00:04:14
    here.
  • 00:04:15
    On the top right of the plate, you'll likely find a water glass which is always filled
  • 00:04:19
    and a wine glass which is empty to begin with.
  • 00:04:22
    Sometimes you also find beer glasses; if you prefer that, if that's what's served with
  • 00:04:26
    a meal.
  • 00:04:27
    If you see little plate with an extra knife on a top left to your plate, that's for bread
  • 00:04:30
    and butter.
  • 00:04:31
    Again, silverware is arranged from the outside in so you see two forks and two knives that
  • 00:04:38
    means you start with the outermost fork and the outermost knife; that's usually for the
  • 00:04:43
    appetizer or the starter course.
  • 00:04:45
    When you're done with the course, you place the fork and a knife at a four to five o'clock
  • 00:04:50
    angle that means you're done.
  • 00:04:51
    If you're not done yet, you can have it in this position or in that position, that indicates
  • 00:04:57
    that you're not finished eating yet.
  • 00:04:58
    Do not put the used silverware back on the tablecloth or the table and simply put it
  • 00:05:03
    on the plate so it can be taken away.
  • 00:05:05
    Trust me, your host thought about it and they put together the place setting and everything
  • 00:05:09
    has a reason.
  • 00:05:10
    In restaurants in the US, you often encounter two forks on the left and one knife on the
  • 00:05:14
    right, in that case, use the outermost fork on the left and the knife on the right to
  • 00:05:19
    eat your starter course and then request a new knife whether it's a steak knife or a
  • 00:05:24
    regular knife for your main course.
  • 00:05:26
    Three, now it's time to serve the food.
  • 00:05:28
    Most informal dinners are family-style meaning there are bowls or platters where food is
  • 00:05:34
    served from.
  • 00:05:36
    For formal dinners, courses are usually plated but we talk about the intricacies of that
  • 00:05:40
    in our formal dining etiquette video here.
  • 00:05:43
    With bowls and anything at the table, the cardinal rule is don't reach over anybody
  • 00:05:48
    else and don't touch them.
  • 00:05:50
    To start, pass the bowl around the table from the left to the right when you get the bowl
  • 00:05:55
    you hold it and you serve yourself then you pass it on to your neighbor on the right.
  • 00:05:59
    Always use the serving utensils and never your silverware that's on your place setting.
  • 00:06:04
    Of course if the host or hostess have a different idea, go with what they do.
  • 00:06:08
    If you like seconds later on or if you want salt, simply ask for it and don't reach it
  • 00:06:14
    unless it's right in front of you.
  • 00:06:16
    If someone asks you for either salt or pepper, always pass both things together.
  • 00:06:22
    When you serve yourself, be reasonable, you can count how many people are at the table
  • 00:06:25
    and everyone want something so don't pile it up on your plate.
  • 00:06:30
    You never want to take more than your fair share and keep in mind there will likely be
  • 00:06:36
    seconds.
  • 00:06:38
    Always be open-minded about the food being served even if you think you don't like something
  • 00:06:42
    the hosts likely put a lot of effort into the meal and you should always at least try
  • 00:06:47
    it.
  • 00:06:48
    Just put a little bit on your plate and try; if you suffer from severe food allergies you
  • 00:06:53
    should tell the host before the dinner is cooked so that they can make the proper arrangements.
  • 00:06:57
    Four, finally it's time to eat.
  • 00:07:00
    You should only start eating when everyone else has been served and a host or hostess
  • 00:07:05
    starts to take their fork and take the lead.
  • 00:07:07
    It is very impolite and sometimes even rude to just dig into your plate of food while
  • 00:07:13
    the others are still empty-handed.
  • 00:07:14
    When it comes to eating with silver, they're basically two schools of thought.
  • 00:07:20
    One is the American Way, and one is the continental way.
  • 00:07:23
    With American way, you hold the fork in your right hand and you eat that way.
  • 00:07:28
    If you cut off something, you transfer the fork to your left hand and have the knife
  • 00:07:33
    in your right hand.
  • 00:07:34
    When you're done cutting place the knife on top of the plate or on a knife rest if it's
  • 00:07:39
    available and then you transfer your fork from the left to the right again and eat.
  • 00:07:45
    Because it's back and forth, it's also known as the zigzag method.
  • 00:07:48
    On the other hand with the Continental method, you hold the fork in the left hand and a knife
  • 00:07:52
    in the right hand.
  • 00:07:53
    That way, there's no switching of back and forth.
  • 00:07:55
    Bboth the American and the continental method are perfectly acceptable.
  • 00:08:00
    Personally, I prefer the Continental version simply because I don't have to switch back
  • 00:08:04
    and forth and so I can focus more on the conversation rather than having to pay attention to my
  • 00:08:10
    plate.
  • 00:08:11
    Even within the Continental school of thought, there are differences in how you put the food
  • 00:08:16
    to your mouth.
  • 00:08:17
    Basically, you hold your fork, you hold it to the left hand more like a pencil, however,
  • 00:08:21
    when you switch to cutting something, you turn the fork around 180 degrees.
  • 00:08:25
    For example, if you cut a piece of meat, you can leave the fork in a cutting position and
  • 00:08:30
    move it right to your mouth that way it's curved down, or you can switch it up and bring
  • 00:08:36
    the fork to your mouth with it facing up.
  • 00:08:39
    Both styles are acceptable when it comes to spoon.
  • 00:08:42
    Basically, everything that is served in a bowl or a boolean cup is supposed to be eaten
  • 00:08:47
    with a spoon.
  • 00:08:48
    the key is to be comfortable with whatever method you use it should always look effortless
  • 00:08:53
    feel free to practice at home until it has really become a part of who you are so you
  • 00:08:58
    never have to think about it twice.
  • 00:09:00
    so the big question is what to do with your elbows?
  • 00:09:03
    as a general rule don't put your elbows on your table when you're eating because it's
  • 00:09:08
    considered to be impolite instead leave your wrists on the table when you're chewing or
  • 00:09:12
    if you go with the American method you can also keep your hand on your lap now in between
  • 00:09:17
    courses or if you have a conversation after, it's totally fine to have your elbows on the
  • 00:09:22
    table just make sure that your body language is engaged and not slouching.
  • 00:09:29
    when eating with company, pace is very important.
  • 00:09:32
    the goal is to have a great flowing conversation and because of that you should neither eat
  • 00:09:37
    too slow nor too fast.
  • 00:09:40
    something that I sometimes struggle with is speed; I eat way too fast so company really
  • 00:09:45
    helps me to slow down and engage in conversation that way, I can enjoy the food and the company
  • 00:09:50
    at the same time a good indicator are always the people around you or your host or hostess
  • 00:09:55
    so neither too fast or too slow as a general rule cut up the pieces of food as you eat
  • 00:10:02
    them don't cut up everything before and then eat it piece by piece that's only something
  • 00:10:06
    you would do for a little child not for a grown person also take small bites and chew
  • 00:10:12
    them and swallow them completely before you take the next bite.
  • 00:10:16
    always eat with their mouth closed and avoid making any chewing noises.
  • 00:10:19
    years ago I used to eat a lot more salt than I do now and so I always made assumptions
  • 00:10:24
    about the food and heavily salt it before I tried it don't be that guy why?
  • 00:10:29
    If a hiring manager sees that you salt your food before you try it they let you believe
  • 00:10:35
    that you make assumptions rather than make decisions based on fact and they're less likely
  • 00:10:40
    to give you the job even in a personal setting it can be disrespectful to just salt your
  • 00:10:44
    food without having tried it in the first place of course if you've tried a food that
  • 00:10:48
    it's underseasoned to your taste ask for salt and pepper and it should be better.
  • 00:10:53
    now it's also a great time to compliment the host or on their table arrangements their
  • 00:10:58
    food may be the choice of their wine or something that you genuinely like make sure you're sincere
  • 00:11:04
    because otherwise, people will notice if someone asks you a question while you're still chewing,
  • 00:11:09
    finish chewing and then answer.
  • 00:11:11
    likewise, don't ask others questions while they're still chewing because it may put them
  • 00:11:16
    in the awkward situation for yourself to chew for 10-15 seconds that creates awkward pauses.
  • 00:11:21
    if bread is served with dinner it's likely served in a basket on a bowl and you pass
  • 00:11:26
    it around just like any other serving roll from the left to the right if you get the
  • 00:11:30
    bowl you take a piece of bread you put it in your plate and you pass it on or put it
  • 00:11:34
    back in its spot most of the time butter is served with bread put some butter on your
  • 00:11:39
    plate with a butter knife that is clean never use a knife or a silverware that has been
  • 00:11:44
    used depending on a country you're in, eating bread can also be different in the u.s.
  • 00:11:49
    most people will butter their entire bread then pick it up by hand and take a bite and
  • 00:11:54
    put the bread back.
  • 00:11:56
    in Germany for example that would be a faux pas
  • 00:11:59
    instead you would take a piece of bread break it off by hand put a little piece of butter
  • 00:12:04
    from your plate onto the bread eat it and then continue later on with breaking the bread
  • 00:12:11
    and butter in it and then eating it so if you travel abroad be aware of the cultural
  • 00:12:16
    differences and try to be cognizant of them and respect them if you end up with excess
  • 00:12:21
    food in your mouth use a napkin on your lap to wipe it off right away make sure to always
  • 00:12:26
    use just one napkin and stick with it otherwiseyou will stain your clothes if something gets
  • 00:12:31
    stuck in your teeth don't just sit there use a toothpick or try to wipe it off when other
  • 00:12:36
    people are there the worst thing you can do is hold up your hand and try to get rid of
  • 00:12:41
    it using your finger and maybe make awkward noises instead excuse yourself go to the rest
  • 00:12:46
    room make yourself look presentable maybe use a toothpick if one is available for example
  • 00:12:51
    in Austria you find toothpicks even at the finest restaurants versus in Germany toothpicks
  • 00:12:57
    are not something you'll commonly encounter on a table if you need to use a toothpick
  • 00:13:01
    it's always safer not to do so in public or at the table
  • 00:13:05
    so how should you excuse yourself if you must leave because you expect an urgent call and
  • 00:13:09
    you have to go there a restroom simply say excuse myself I'll be right back please don't
  • 00:13:14
    explain why you have to leave what the reason is or that you just had four beers earlier
  • 00:13:19
    and that you really have to pee that's just not an appropriate conversation at the time
  • 00:13:24
    so while getting up from your chair fold your napkin and place it to the left on your plate
  • 00:13:29
    or on the chair no it doesn't have to be folded like before just make sure it looks neat also
  • 00:13:34
    push your chair right back in my wife always gets annoyed with me if I don't put my chair
  • 00:13:38
    back if you ever have to leave the table make sure to keep it short and five minutes max
  • 00:13:43
    otherwise it's very rude and impolite to stay away from longer than that
  • 00:13:47
    now all that being said here are some things you should never do when eating never use
  • 00:13:51
    your fingers to eat food of the plate or especially put your last bit of food onto the fork instead
  • 00:13:58
    use a knife I see a lot of people making that mistake but it's completely unnecessary because
  • 00:14:03
    you have all of the utensils at your disposal likewise never lick your fingers or your fork
  • 00:14:09
    or your plate afterwards even though it's really really tasty do not use your fork to
  • 00:14:14
    cut something up I see it time and time again where people are too lazy to pick up their
  • 00:14:19
    knife and then they just try to push down but it's just shows that you don't have proper
  • 00:14:23
    table manners also don't flatten your food I distinctly remember my grandpa always kind
  • 00:14:29
    of smashing down everything and flattening out on his table because he wanted his food
  • 00:14:33
    to cool down faster so he could eat faster it's just a bad look and it creates a bad
  • 00:14:39
    vibe.
  • 00:14:40
    Now that we talked about eating a lot about eating what about drinking as a rule of thumb
  • 00:14:44
    you should never drink unless your host has raised a glass to a toast or started drinking
  • 00:14:49
    themselves typically you toast with wine or champagne maybe with beer but definitely not
  • 00:14:55
    with water or pop if there's stemmed glass on the table you should hold them by the stem
  • 00:15:00
    don't let the host or other guests dictate of how much alcohol you drink you know your
  • 00:15:06
    limits and it's okay to say no thank you or to simply not continue drinking your glass
  • 00:15:11
    even though it's still full or half full don't get wasted and keep your consumption moderate
  • 00:15:17
    you don't want to be the odd guy out who gets hammered when he's invited over for dinner
  • 00:15:22
    because it will likely be the last invitation for you generally you should not ask for more
  • 00:15:27
    wine or beer a good host will notice that your glass is empty and offer you more if
  • 00:15:32
    they have more
  • 00:15:33
    now as I said before the main goal of having dinner and company is to have a great conversation
  • 00:15:38
    and so your body language and how you converse are very important it all starts with your
  • 00:15:42
    voice moderate the volume of it so you don't scream because that can be very unpleasant
  • 00:15:48
    let other people finish talking and ask interesting questions and then listen if you behave well
  • 00:15:54
    and you're very entertaining you may even end up with a compliment if you want to learn
  • 00:15:58
    how to accept one a graceful way please check out this video here.
  • 00:16:02
    At the end of a meal just fold your napkin and place it next to your plate never put
  • 00:16:07
    it on the plate now most people will never call out bad table manners in person however
  • 00:16:12
    they will reflect poorly on you and you may not be invited back or your invitations may
  • 00:16:18
    be rebuffed now that you're equipped with this table etiquette knowledge you probably
  • 00:16:24
    know more than the average person out there however that doesn't mean that you should
  • 00:16:28
    chastise others about their table manners or even worse criticize the host or tell them
  • 00:16:34
    what to do especially in a public setting because it's very embarrassing instead always
  • 00:16:39
    be kind be generous ask questions listen be a good sport and smile
  • 00:16:46
    In today's video I'm wearing two suit separates the jacket of one which is a brown and blue
  • 00:16:51
    Prince of Wales check and a blue pair of pants from another suit together they work quite
  • 00:16:57
    well I'm combining them with another pair of brown Oxfords that are half brogues with
  • 00:17:03
    a hand finish patina I tie everything together with a pair of brown and light blue socks
  • 00:17:09
    one from Fort Belvedere that'll pick up the color of the jacket and separate the shoes
  • 00:17:13
    from the pants my shirt is plain white with a classic color and button barrel cuffs my
  • 00:17:19
    tie is made of English madder silk and the pattern ties together my shirt as well as
  • 00:17:26
    the pattern of my jacket provides enough contrast and the pattern stands out from the background
  • 00:17:31
    the tie is from Fort Belvedere I designed it and you can fin it in our shop here just
  • 00:17:36
    like the pocket square which is likewise from Fort Belvedere I chose a burgundy color that
  • 00:17:41
    picks up the blue and yellow tones of the tie the jacket and the shoes as well as the
  • 00:17:46
    pants and I chose a silk wool combination that ties together the flannel material of
  • 00:17:53
    the jacket with the shiny or silk texture of the tie my right ring finger I'm wearing
  • 00:17:59
    a gold ring with a dark star sapphire that changes the look in the light if you enjoyed
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