00:00:04
sex education the conversation that
00:00:06
animals in zoos refuse to let you not
00:00:08
have
00:00:09
now with some kids going back to school
00:00:11
next week it is guaranteed that at some
00:00:13
point over the next school year you'll
00:00:15
hear stories like this
00:00:17
local parents are outraged tonight over
00:00:20
the pictures that their children saw in
00:00:22
sex ed class some parents say that the
00:00:25
material which includes descriptions of
00:00:27
sex acts and infections is simply too
00:00:30
graphic for middle schoolers a father is
00:00:33
upset after his 13 year old showed him a
00:00:35
poster hanging on a classroom door a
00:00:37
poster listing sex acts parental anger
00:00:40
over sex ed is as much a staple of the
00:00:43
school year as square pizza and one kid
00:00:45
coming back from summer vacation with a
00:00:47
mustache he's way too proud of
00:00:49
that that's a ghost mustache louis it
00:00:52
looks like a real mustache died on your
00:00:54
face
00:00:55
so
00:00:57
so we tried this week to find out what
00:00:59
sex ed looks like in america right now
00:01:02
but that turns out to be a surprisingly
00:01:04
difficult question to answer now in the
00:01:06
past depending on how old you are sex
00:01:08
education may have been little more than
00:01:10
watching films like this
00:01:12
every so often i get a strong sex urge
00:01:15
and the only way i can take care of it
00:01:17
is to
00:01:17
masturbate george i'm really pleased
00:01:19
that you can tell me about this perhaps
00:01:21
it's because we've known each other for
00:01:23
so long my name is johnny stent for me
00:01:26
it all started when i went bowling with
00:01:28
judy today
00:01:29
i should have known something was
00:01:31
different as soon as she got a strike
00:01:34
[Music]
00:01:35
she's usually such a rotten bowler so
00:01:37
what's so different about you i got my
00:01:40
first period today what's the big deal
00:01:43
it means that blood is flowing out of my
00:01:44
uterus
00:01:52
what
00:01:53
what okay okay
00:01:55
okay
00:01:56
first that is some incredible
00:01:58
misinformation
00:01:59
menstrual blood is not some sort of
00:02:01
uterine hgh that makes you amazing at
00:02:04
bowling
00:02:05
and and second and this is true the
00:02:07
young man in that that video is jonathan
00:02:09
banks mike from breaking bad
00:02:13
and if that video if that video does not
00:02:16
provide the basis for the prequel to
00:02:18
better call seoul i'm going to be
00:02:19
extremely disappointed
00:02:22
teaching sex ad in schools is really
00:02:24
important for obvious reasons no parent
00:02:27
wants to talk to their kids about sex
00:02:29
and no kid wants to talk about sex with
00:02:32
their parents that is why when you're
00:02:33
watching a movie together and there's a
00:02:35
sex scene everyone becomes motionless
00:02:37
and silently begs for the merciful
00:02:39
release of death
00:02:42
and kids have good questions that need
00:02:45
good answers the times recently ran an
00:02:47
article with a slideshow of questions
00:02:49
kids wrote on on cards to a sex educator
00:02:52
including why is the boy's penis shaped
00:02:54
like an arrow
00:02:56
is it okay to be gay and how long do i
00:02:58
have to wait to have sex i'm excited
00:03:02
to which to which the answers are it's
00:03:04
engaged with blood yes and can you at
00:03:07
least wait until the end of class
00:03:10
but perhaps the most poignant question
00:03:12
was will this go well for me because
00:03:15
after looking into sex ed programs this
00:03:17
week the answer depends quite a bit on
00:03:20
where you live there is no required
00:03:22
standard for sex ed in this country in
00:03:24
fact only 22 states mandate that kids
00:03:26
receive it and only 13 require that the
00:03:29
information presented be medically
00:03:31
accurate
00:03:32
which is crazy
00:03:34
you wouldn't accept a history class not
00:03:36
being historically accurate prince
00:03:39
started the american revolution in 1984
00:03:41
and his purple reign lasts until the
00:03:43
present day class dismissed
00:03:47
we essentially have a weird patchwork
00:03:49
system that varies wildly and not just
00:03:51
from state to state but from district to
00:03:53
district and even from school to school
00:03:56
in fact one ohio newscast tried to find
00:03:59
out what kids in their area were
00:04:00
learning and hit a brick wall the state
00:04:03
has no
00:04:04
absolutely none sex ed guidelines so
00:04:07
each school district decides what's best
00:04:08
for whatever kid many school districts
00:04:11
don't want to talk about it at all you
00:04:13
see students polled every school
00:04:14
district in four southwest ohio counties
00:04:17
the majority wouldn't tell us what they
00:04:19
teach and when they teach it even though
00:04:22
all this is supposed to be public
00:04:24
information and that's really not good
00:04:27
because two teenagers shouldn't have
00:04:28
completely different levels of sex ed
00:04:30
just because they're in two different
00:04:31
school districts at tonight's football
00:04:33
game is between lakewood high and
00:04:36
middletown high not only are they bitter
00:04:38
rivals one of those teams has no idea
00:04:40
what a diaphragm is let's play ball
00:04:42
let's play ball
00:04:44
but but while it is hard to find out
00:04:45
what kids are learning in some cases it
00:04:48
is possible to find out what they are
00:04:50
not learning for instance in mississippi
00:04:52
while you can talk about contraceptives
00:04:55
the law prohibits condom demonstrations
00:04:57
in class that means no condom on a
00:04:59
banana no condom on a cucumber no condom
00:05:02
on a zucchini
00:05:03
and that's terrible partly because it's
00:05:05
fun putting condoms on produce
00:05:09
but mainly because mississippi ranks
00:05:11
number two in the country in teen
00:05:13
pregnancy rates now thankfully this
00:05:15
situation has inspired some creative
00:05:18
alternatives watch this former teacher
00:05:20
describe how to use a condom without
00:05:22
directly using a condom i start with a
00:05:25
sock and i want to pinch out the air out
00:05:28
of the tip of the side because i want to
00:05:29
make sure that there's room for my toes
00:05:31
when i'm engaging in shoe activity then
00:05:34
i take the sock and i put it on top of
00:05:36
my foot you want to take your sock and
00:05:38
you want to roll it all the way down
00:05:40
your foot you want to roll it all the
00:05:42
way down your foot and then you can put
00:05:44
it inside your shoe
00:05:46
that is
00:05:47
very clever that's very clever although
00:05:50
although
00:05:52
that's it's not perfect you know if you
00:05:54
can't get a sock out of the packaging
00:05:56
you don't then lose your foot for a
00:05:57
minute and need to think of rihanna to
00:05:59
get it back
00:06:00
but
00:06:01
it's back but uh but mississippi's
00:06:04
restrictions
00:06:05
are just the beginning here in eight
00:06:07
states there are laws considerably
00:06:09
limiting what teachers can say about
00:06:11
homosexuality to their students meaning
00:06:13
the answer to that kid's question is it
00:06:15
okay to be gay could be a shrug or a lot
00:06:18
worse
00:06:19
and utah's law prohibits any instruction
00:06:22
in the intricacies of intercourse for
00:06:24
reasons that one state legislator
00:06:26
explained
00:06:27
those are the things we do not want to
00:06:29
be taught in our schools those are
00:06:31
things that should be taught in your
00:06:32
home wait
00:06:34
taught in your home here is an exchange
00:06:37
that has never happened how are you so
00:06:39
good at sex i was homeschooled
00:06:42
and
00:06:44
and
00:06:45
in certain districts around the country
00:06:47
the only sex ed you might receive is
00:06:49
abstinence only which you may think of
00:06:52
as a relic of the past but it is still
00:06:54
very much around congress recently
00:06:56
increased federal funding for
00:06:57
abstinence-only education from about
00:06:59
from about 50 to 75 million dollars per
00:07:02
year and at least part of that money
00:07:04
gets matched by the states which means
00:07:06
that students are still being exposed to
00:07:09
abstinence-centered programs but with
00:07:11
names like weight which stands for why
00:07:13
am i tempted
00:07:15
go ape or abstinence protects everyone
00:07:18
and no screwing around which i presume
00:07:21
stands for no one should copy like
00:07:22
regularly except when did individuals
00:07:24
now reach around occasionally ultimately
00:07:26
not disastrous
00:07:28
and
00:07:29
and here is here is a taste of a video
00:07:32
from that last program
00:07:34
if you have sex
00:07:36
outside of one
00:07:37
permanent monogamous and monogamy does
00:07:40
not mean one at a time that means one
00:07:43
partner who has only been with you you
00:07:45
have sex outside of that context and you
00:07:47
will pay boys if there's a girl throwing
00:07:50
herself at you if she's the one
00:07:52
pressuring you for sex if this is a girl
00:07:53
that's dressing in that manner that's
00:07:55
saying not only to you but the rest of
00:07:56
the world take me now i got a little
00:07:58
word of advice for you run from this
00:08:00
girl run i did not say walk away slowly
00:08:03
i said run from her
00:08:05
in fact
00:08:06
don't even bother running boys just cut
00:08:08
your dicks off
00:08:10
girls are snake charmers and it's time
00:08:12
to murder your snakes murder them now do
00:08:14
it do it
00:08:16
and look
00:08:17
abstinence is a healthy choice that many
00:08:20
teens will make either by choice or as i
00:08:22
can attest by circumstance but but but
00:08:26
that's not the point that's not the
00:08:27
point
00:08:28
it should not be
00:08:30
the only thing you teach
00:08:32
and not just because many studies
00:08:34
question its efficacy the fact is
00:08:37
according to the cdc most americans have
00:08:40
more than one sexual partner in their
00:08:41
lifetime and the average age at which
00:08:43
people begin having sex is around 17 so
00:08:46
just saying don't do it is not practical
00:08:49
and even when they do teach sex ed
00:08:52
schools can teach it with a strong bias
00:08:54
we found a company which offers schools
00:08:56
two versions of the same video on
00:08:58
contraception version b is labeled as
00:09:01
being non-judgmental take a look
00:09:04
look no one ever said being a teenager
00:09:06
is easy you have to face a lot of
00:09:09
important decisions
00:09:11
but no decision is probably more
00:09:12
important than the one you'll make about
00:09:14
becoming sexually active
00:09:16
some of you may already be sexually
00:09:17
active but still a lot of you are not
00:09:20
having sex yet you could be waiting for
00:09:22
marriage the right person or maybe
00:09:25
you're just not ready to take on this
00:09:27
very serious responsibility right now
00:09:30
cool
00:09:32
folks
00:09:33
those um those 30 year old actors
00:09:36
dressed like teenagers from the 90s make
00:09:37
some very good points
00:09:39
however
00:09:40
however version a which is
00:09:43
non-non-judgmental goes in a slightly
00:09:45
different direction see if you can spot
00:09:47
it
00:09:49
one ever said being a teenager is easy
00:09:52
you have to face a lot of important
00:09:54
decisions
00:09:55
but no decision is probably more
00:09:57
important than the one you'll make about
00:09:58
becoming sexually active as a teenager
00:10:01
you're expected to wait until you're
00:10:02
married before you become sexually
00:10:04
active
00:10:05
until then
00:10:07
abstinence is the only option that's
00:10:09
acceptable to your family
00:10:11
your school
00:10:12
and your community
00:10:13
well hold on
00:10:15
why did they even keep the first part
00:10:16
about it being a decision at all
00:10:19
but they should have just said no
00:10:20
decision is more non-existent than the
00:10:22
one you don't get to make about sex also
00:10:25
remember god is watching you masturbate
00:10:27
and the fluids coming out of your
00:10:28
genitals are actually his
00:10:31
you're tears him sad
00:10:34
but but the very fact
00:10:36
two videos with the same title but very
00:10:39
different messages exist shows just how
00:10:41
hard it can be to find out what's going
00:10:44
on with sex ed where you live and this
00:10:46
is not even accounting for guest
00:10:48
speakers that schools can bring in to
00:10:50
augment their program remember the woman
00:10:52
from no screwing around that's pam
00:10:54
stenzel and her website claims she
00:10:55
speaks to half a million young people
00:10:58
each year presumably like this here's
00:11:01
the line over which you can't step
00:11:03
absolutely no
00:11:05
genital
00:11:06
contact
00:11:07
of any kind that's hand to genital
00:11:11
mouth to genital
00:11:13
genital to genitals
00:11:16
oral sex
00:11:17
which is mouth to genital
00:11:19
is sex and if you have ever stepped over
00:11:22
this line you've risked disease and you
00:11:24
need to get tested and don't you dare
00:11:28
don't you dare tell anyone you're a
00:11:30
virgin
00:11:32
why
00:11:33
why are you trying to yell the horniness
00:11:35
out of teenagers
00:11:38
crow programs like hers are so
00:11:40
relentlessly anti-sex you could easily
00:11:42
come away thinking the adult world is
00:11:44
just an endless barrage of unwanted
00:11:46
dicks which
00:11:48
incidentally was the original slogan for
00:11:50
tinder but
00:11:52
but
00:11:52
but the problem is
00:11:55
the problem is stanza is not alone
00:11:58
shelley donahue currently speaks at
00:12:00
schools around the country she likes to
00:12:01
show the dangers of more than one sexual
00:12:03
partner by describing women as a piece
00:12:05
of tape and then sticking the tape to
00:12:08
the arms of multiple boys until this
00:12:10
happens
00:12:11
how many partners do we have before we
00:12:12
get married on average in america six
00:12:15
yeah so can you imagine what's going to
00:12:16
start to happen to the tape
00:12:18
it's going to lose its bonding power
00:12:22
her point is the tape is used so much it
00:12:25
becomes damaged which doesn't even
00:12:26
consider the possibility that the tape
00:12:28
might be perfectly happy and have had a
00:12:30
good time or that maybe some guys like
00:12:32
tape that already knows how to stick
00:12:34
when they meet them
00:12:36
but
00:12:37
but this idea that sex is something
00:12:40
which devalues those who've had it
00:12:42
particularly women crops up again and
00:12:44
again non-virgins can be likened to a
00:12:47
used toothbrush or a chewed up piece of
00:12:50
gum and then there is this video in
00:12:52
which a non-virgin on her wedding night
00:12:54
is compared to a dirty shoe
00:12:57
oh what are these
00:12:59
my sneakers
00:13:01
michelle what is this it looks like the
00:13:03
entire football team has been in these
00:13:05
things
00:13:06
i mean i need them all wear socks socks
00:13:09
but you help
00:13:10
socks don't protect my heart you can
00:13:12
still get foot fungus with socks i wish
00:13:14
i could go back in time
00:13:16
and make a commitment to be abstinent
00:13:18
until marriage
00:13:19
that is heartbreaking and not just
00:13:22
because he's shaming his wife but
00:13:24
because michelle socks don't protect my
00:13:26
heart might be the funniest line ever
00:13:28
delivered on this show and we didn't
00:13:31
write it
00:13:33
and that that kind of message can be
00:13:35
hugely damaging to anyone who hears it
00:13:38
especially survivors of sexual assault
00:13:40
like elizabeth smart who was kidnapped
00:13:43
and assaulted at the age of 14 and you
00:13:45
may recognize one of the metaphors she
00:13:47
remembers one of her teachers using
00:13:49
she said imagine you're a stick of gum
00:13:52
and
00:13:54
when you engage in sex that's like
00:13:56
that's like getting chewed
00:13:58
and then if you do that lots of times
00:14:00
you're going to become an old piece of
00:14:02
gum and who's going to want you after
00:14:04
that
00:14:05
well that's
00:14:07
terrible but
00:14:09
nobody should ever say that
00:14:12
but for me i thought oh my gosh i'm that
00:14:15
chewed up piece of gum
00:14:17
learning nothing would have been better
00:14:20
than learning that it's not a great
00:14:21
reflection on her teacher that kids who
00:14:23
were sick that day got a better
00:14:25
education than she did and the sad thing
00:14:28
is sex ed when done well can do so much
00:14:30
good but when it's done badly it can do
00:14:33
real harm take consent a recent survey
00:14:36
found college students were confused
00:14:37
about certain aspects of it for instance
00:14:39
when asked whether another person
00:14:41
undressing getting a condom or nodding
00:14:43
established consent for more sexual
00:14:45
activity at least 40 percent said yes
00:14:48
and at least 40 percent said no and that
00:14:50
ambiguity is a problem because sex is
00:14:54
like boxing if both people didn't fully
00:14:56
agree to participate one of them is
00:14:58
committing a crime
00:15:01
and abstinence-heavy messages do not
00:15:03
help this they spend so much time on the
00:15:06
importance of saying no they can leave
00:15:08
out what informed enthusiastic consent
00:15:10
looks like or even worse suggests that
00:15:12
it's all one party's responsibility like
00:15:14
in this video from a program called sex
00:15:17
smart about fending off unwanted
00:15:19
advances maybe we should have sex you
00:15:21
know to prove our love for each other
00:15:23
do you really think we're ready yeah i'm
00:15:26
ready oops that didn't work
00:15:29
for each other
00:15:31
no
00:15:32
does that mean no or yes
00:15:35
one more try this time say it like you
00:15:39
mean it
00:15:40
for each other
00:15:42
no way
00:15:43
finally
00:15:46
maybe we should just get to the concert
00:15:48
wait wait
00:15:50
they were already late for a concert
00:15:52
but he felt there was still time to have
00:15:55
sex that is a teenage boy with a very
00:15:57
accurate sense of his abilities
00:16:00
but but much
00:16:02
much more to the point here
00:16:04
much more to the point it's good that
00:16:06
that girl was being taught that she has
00:16:07
the power to say no but nowhere in the
00:16:09
video do they point out that that guy
00:16:11
should have been a lot better at hearing
00:16:13
it and it is weird to gloss over
00:16:16
something so appalling it's like that
00:16:18
moment in greece when kaniki sang tell
00:16:20
me more tell me more did she put up a
00:16:22
fight that's the point they should have
00:16:24
stopped the whole song and gone wait
00:16:26
what what the did you just say
00:16:28
what is wrong with you kenickie what is
00:16:31
right you're a monster and you look 40.
00:16:36
and when kids graduate high school
00:16:39
without a full understanding of consent
00:16:41
you are a betting and already troubling
00:16:43
culture where a bunch of frat guys can
00:16:45
march around yale feeling completely
00:16:48
comfortable yelling
00:16:51
[Music]
00:16:52
[Applause]
00:16:58
just a quick reminder there yale's
00:17:00
acceptance rate is 6.3 percent so who
00:17:03
the are they turning down
00:17:06
i would hate to hear their chance and
00:17:08
the problem is that is not an isolated
00:17:10
incident last year fraternities at both
00:17:12
texas tech and lsu were caught using the
00:17:15
same slogan it's become something you
00:17:17
hear on college campuses as often as i'm
00:17:19
thinking of switching majors or why is
00:17:22
james franco here
00:17:25
and
00:17:26
here is the thing
00:17:28
there is no way we'd allow any other
00:17:31
academic program to consistently fail to
00:17:33
prepare students for life after school
00:17:35
and human sexuality unlike calculus is
00:17:38
something you actually need to know
00:17:40
about for the rest of your life
00:17:42
and maybe you and your family live
00:17:44
somewhere that has good sex ed in which
00:17:46
case congratulations but if you don't
00:17:49
this video is for you
00:17:54
look no one ever said being a teenager
00:17:56
is easy you have to face a lot of
00:17:58
important decisions but no decision is
00:18:00
probably more important than the one
00:18:01
you'll make about becoming sexually
00:18:04
active and if you do
00:18:05
there's a few things you should
00:18:07
definitely know
00:18:10
this is a penis this is a vagina
00:18:13
this is a mouth this is a hand and this
00:18:16
is a butt
00:18:17
you can mix as many of these as you feel
00:18:19
comfortable with hand and mouth would be
00:18:22
weird but you could this
00:18:25
is the clitoris and these are the
00:18:27
testicles they make sperm
00:18:29
that's pretty much it
00:18:30
[Music]
00:18:32
if you want to be abstinent that's fine
00:18:34
if you don't want to be abstinent that's
00:18:36
also fine abstinence is like being a
00:18:39
vegetarian people should respect your
00:18:41
choice some people might make fun of you
00:18:43
those people are
00:18:47
the best safeguard against stds is
00:18:50
protection unless you already have an
00:18:52
std in which case you're gonna need
00:18:53
medicine or some
00:18:55
fun fact the ancient egyptians put
00:18:57
crocodile dung mixed with honey inside a
00:19:00
vagina to prevent pregnancy
00:19:02
they're all dead now here's how you put
00:19:04
a condom on a banana
00:19:07
oh this is a lot less curvy than i'm
00:19:09
used to
00:19:12
this is an iud an iud goes inside a
00:19:15
woman's body and prevents pregnancy from
00:19:16
taking place they can stay inside you
00:19:18
for up to 10 years which is a lot
00:19:21
considering most guys in high school can
00:19:22
only stay inside you for a minute or two
00:19:24
tops
00:19:25
all right here's a bunch of other forms
00:19:27
of birth control
00:19:28
google them
00:19:32
this is actually simple if someone
00:19:34
doesn't want to have sex with you
00:19:36
don't have sex with them if you think
00:19:38
you might be able to persuade someone to
00:19:40
have sex even though they don't want to
00:19:43
don't so if you're not sure if someone
00:19:45
wants to have sex with you ask even if
00:19:48
you're kind of sure
00:19:50
still ask if someone is pretty drunk
00:19:52
they might not be able to give consent
00:19:54
and remember you can always say no even
00:19:58
halfway through you can say no if
00:20:00
someone wants you to do a sex thing
00:20:01
you're not comfortable with you have the
00:20:03
right to refuse say i don't care if it's
00:20:05
your birthday rebecca i don't want you
00:20:06
to put your finger in my butt okay tell
00:20:09
me this was talking about this real
00:20:11
quick couple final things most people
00:20:13
will get hpv is both technically true
00:20:16
and what you tend to hear right before
00:20:17
someone gives you hpv if you call it a
00:20:20
hoo-ha
00:20:21
you are not ready for sex lube
00:20:24
is your friend
00:20:25
believe me if you get a chance to have
00:20:27
sex with this man
00:20:29
go for it the best safe word is poot
00:20:32
nanny a woman who's had sex is not like
00:20:35
a dirty shoe a woman who's had sex is
00:20:37
like a
00:20:38
a shoe with laces completely
00:20:41
normal
00:20:42
and finally this is important if anyone
00:20:45
ever tells you that getting your period
00:20:47
makes you better at bowling
00:20:53
[Applause]
00:21:04
you
