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hi beautiful souls and my lovely friends
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on the interweb welcome back to this
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channel on astrology human design J Keys
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life love and a space for the wild
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Hearts today I want to talk about a very
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near and dear topic to my heart I've
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been getting a lot of questions about
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this so I thought it would be time to
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talk about it the true whole story of
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why and how I left my full-time job and
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what I'm currently doing now to sustain
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myself the struggles the celebrations
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the
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rewards and the the lessons that I've
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gained from this whole journey so the
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story began with leaving high school we
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can say that's how it usually starts I
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have a degree in architecture so I
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studied design and architecture in
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University for four years in Thailand in
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janagan University in Thailand
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and I um didn't like it so I struggled
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like the first two years of my
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university life was a big struggle but I
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you know kind of started working hard
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again during the last two years of my
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university life because my parents were
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complaining about my grades and I was
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like okay you know I might as well it's
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almost over I might as well just do my
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best to try to graduate with the best
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possible score that I could so so I did
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that and um graduated
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from um university with a degree in
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architecture and I never got a job as an
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architect or a designer or anything like
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that after that my first job I went
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straight into being a TV news reporter
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but um that didn't last very long
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because it was very tiring for me um and
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at the same time the channel was sort of
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not being supported financially by the
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government anymore and it was just kind
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of like going downhill so I decided to
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leave and I had a couple of other jobs
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after that but the longest full-time job
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that I've ever had was being an English
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teacher so I was an English teacher in
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Malaysia and Singapore I was basically
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you know teaching in Malaysia I was
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teaching English for adults and for
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second for speakers of English as a
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second language and in Singapore I was
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teaching English to
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kids and both of these
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jobs there were two major reasons why I
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left
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it one was a reason that had to do with
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my own life purpose my own energy
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alignment and the second reason was
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because of the way
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that I couldn't find Value in the work
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anymore
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so you guys have maybe already heard
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about the first one which was how
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intensive teaching can be and how like
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when you are a teacher especially when I
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was teaching I was required to teach the
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entire day and sometimes I'd have
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back-to-back classes for 6 hours
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straight and so that really did a toll
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on my health and of course when I was in
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my early you know 20s when this first
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started it still felt okay but I
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remembered there was this one day where
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I had severe period
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cramps and I had to go in to teach and I
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remember that it was so severe that I
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couldn't teach that I was at the
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teacher's lounge and I had like my head
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on the table like that and the director
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of studies came and he was a very
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compassionate um boss so he was like
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okay don't worry about it I'll get
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somebody else to substitute for for you
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you should just take a rest and maybe go
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and get like some medication for it or
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something like that and so that was a
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point in my life where I had these
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intense period cramps every single month
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and I had to take painkillers every time
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they came every single month because I
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didn't know any
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better but that was the first sign that
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things were not
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aligning and when I was teaching 6 hours
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in a row what also happened was was that
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when I was teaching kids you can't
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really leave the classroom otherwise
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they go a little bit crazy no matter the
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amount of rules you put there you have
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to come back and deal with the
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consequences later you could say and
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sometimes they were really young like I
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had kids that were
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from I can't remember exactly but like 5
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or 6 years old all the way until 18 so
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the really young ones you really
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couldn't
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leave and the thing was that being a
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human design projector I didn't really
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have the you know go go go type of
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energy right so I would drink coffee to
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help get me
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through and of course drinking coffee
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stimulates my bladder even more and the
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more my bladder is stimulated the more
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that I have to go to the bathroom even
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more often so I would have like these
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bladder pangs every 30 minutes and that
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was insane to have to leave the
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classroom like every 30 minutes right
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but if I didn't drink coffee I would
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fall asleep like I remember sitting in
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the cafe cafeteria of the school and
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with again with my head on the table
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like that and um falling asleep and so I
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was like all right I'm going to need and
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I was drinking three or four cups of
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coffee a day which is way too
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much so that happened and of course I
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would try my best to hold my bladder but
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it eventually backfired and I got a
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bladder infection for the very first
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time in my life when I was about I guess
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it was 28 years old I had never never
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had a bladder infection ever before that
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and because of the way that I was really
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hustling and holding my bladder and it
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was just not
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normal I got my first ever bladder
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infection and so that was the the
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physical build up and of course there
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was the the physical buildup lead to the
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emotional buildup which was you know me
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going home every day crying crying
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before I have to go to work and really
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not wanting to have to do it
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anymore the other reason for it was that
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when I was teaching in Singapore I saw
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how the education system
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worked so what I was noticing what I was
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doing was that I was put into a position
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where like I was
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teaching
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um English for students when they are
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changing from primary school to
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secondary school and
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there were you know secondary schools
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that are considered on top of the list
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and you know
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parents really pushed their kids to try
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to get into the better schools and the
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kinds of schools that these kids would
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be transferring to whether it's going to
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be the top of the list or down the the
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bottom of the list was dependent on
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their test scores and I was basically
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the teacher who was teaching them how to
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score higher in these tests
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and these kids were
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11 10 11 years old and I could remember
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how stressed out they were they spent
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their Sundays some of them probably
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Saturdays too to go to these schools and
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these tutoring lessons for their test at
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11 years
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old at a time when
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I believe they need to be playing they
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need to be creative they need to
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be exploring the world around them their
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environment not sitting in a classroom
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for so many hours in a day on their
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weekend to study into these tests
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because their parents think that it's
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what's best for
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them and I feel that a lot of it has to
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do also with the way that we as a
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society view our image and the way that
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we we want to fit in to so certain
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Social Circles and we not to say that
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this is a conscious act but it does
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happen that we use our children
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to elevate our self-confidence
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self-esteem social life
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and it's not a great thing to
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do and the thing is that like the
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generational
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wounds The ancestral Karma that exists
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in every single family in the
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world and that is
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dishonesty and it starts with dishonesty
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with the
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self and that means lying to yourself
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right we lie to ourselves and we say
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this is what best for our kid and though
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a part of that may be true but there is
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another part of that that is really
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about our
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own need to fit in and to feel
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confident because we haven't done the
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inner healing work to working to work on
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ourselves and well we have a kid here in
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front of us and it's so much easier to
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control another person than to control
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ourselves it's so much easier to
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say let them work on themselves let them
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do the test let them prove then to say
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that I have to do the test of myself
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that I have to work on my need to prove
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that's much harder to
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do that that is um feels like an attack
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on our
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ego so yeah that was the that was what I
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saw happening
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and I L those kids that I was teaching
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they're so sweet they're so so sweet you
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know they they would bring me gifts and
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they would say thank you Miss tan for
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helping me with my test you know I got
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this score or that score that's
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school and but I also saw a lot of them
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were so depressed coming
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into that
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classroom and you know some kids when
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they're depressed they they hide away
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they don't do their homework and then
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their parents blame them for not doing
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the homework
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and but you know kids are innocent and
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when their body doesn't feel aligned
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with something they don't lie they can't
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force themselves to do it and that is a
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part of the human nature that a lot of
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us have lost
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too but I also saw that a lot of the
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kids that came in because they didn't
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want to do this they rebelled they were
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extremely naughty they were competitive
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even a little bit aggressive not
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physically but just like sometimes even
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like the way they you know their
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presence their Aura was like a bully you
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know to other kids because they just
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really didn't want to do didn't want to
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come here didn't want to spend their
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Sundays like
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this I thought to
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myself I can't support this this doesn't
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allow line with my beliefs this is
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not how I want to teach or what I want
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to teach and I even remember that I was
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in one classroom with like 18-year-old
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so they were studying for University you
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know I remember that I made a joke one
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day cuz they all looked so depressed and
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I was like oh come on but I made a joke
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one day and I said you know what it
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doesn't matter at the end of the day
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what kind of University you go to most
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of us don't even have jobs that are
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related to what we studied
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anyways and I remember they looked at me
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like like they didn't they couldn't
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believe that that's
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possible what I value is how we can show
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the youngsters the
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youth the possibilities of life rather
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than the lack of
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life and once they lose that part of
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themselves that part of their life that
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should be about play they lose that
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to to become an adult too early we
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either do two things we Rebel later on
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in our life and that can be even more
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damaging because there are more
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consequences there you know we might
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already have a family or we might
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already have our own kids or we might
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already have a very a
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job or we continue to suppress that part
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of us that inner child part of us and it
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it collapses
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inwards the fire of your inner child
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Burns you from the inside out and that's
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when we get health problems and so I
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left because nothing was aligning
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anymore in that
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sense and I decided to start making
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YouTube videos about astrology because
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that and human design astrology human
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design later on genan keys because human
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design was the thing that made me
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realize I was a projector and I didn't
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need this I I there are other ways I
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could use my
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energy that I could do less and be more
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attractive and experience success in a
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different
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way and astrology helped me to learn
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about my relationships with other people
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learn more about myself and that is
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something that I really wish we could
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teach in all of the
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schools I wish that we could learn two
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more things in school first is learning
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about ourselves learning about
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personality types and learning about
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astrology or human design
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learning about psychology of ourselves
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learning about embodiment learning about
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our
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bodies and the second thing is I really
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wish that in school we could be learning
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about
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relationships how to have an open
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conversation with another person how to
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be honest in our
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relationship what does real intimacy
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really mean how to raise kids how to
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raise our kids you know now maybe not in
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early in school but like a school for
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that they're probably is but to have an
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element of okay that is you know
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relational themes so important in our
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life
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right and so if you're listening and you
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know you have some kind of power to be
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able to change the education system this
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is my invitation for you to take up this
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offer and and do something about
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this because a lot of the unhappiness
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that we see in the world is because one
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we have lost our inner child we all need
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need space for that we lost our
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innocence our
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play what is life without play and
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laughter and colors and art and
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creativity can you imagine your world
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was filled with adults and there were no
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kids or there was no adult that you know
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was in touch with their inner child
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there was no art there was no music
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there was no sense of Innocence or
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play what was I saying I think I lost my
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train of thought
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there yes a lot of the unhappiness in
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the world two we're too serious about
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life it's kind of this kind of related
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to the first one we're way too
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serious and this seriousness leads to
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living life with lack living life out of
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survival this is why we're so
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unhappy we feel that life is so unsafe
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we've lost our trust in the world
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and that is also because we lost the
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childhood
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there think about it these kids kids are
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you know forced to go to these classes
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and that doesn't feel safe for them
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because now it's either I go to a high
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ranking school or I go to a lower
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ranking school and my parents are not
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going to approve if I go to a lower
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ranking school and so they're now living
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in fear they've learned to do that since
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they were young and the body remembers
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things that the Mind cannot even
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remember and so growing up to become
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adults the body is still finds it hard
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to trust to find it hard to feel like
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the world is a safe place the body
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doesn't change that easily you know it
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may take seven years right cuz our soul
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memory it takes yes seven years for it
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to reprogram it reprogram itself
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so that takes healing work and when we
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live in a world where we feel like
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things are not safe that we can't really
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trust anybody even ourselves
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then we have to defend ourselves and
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that is what we see a
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lot we defend instead of we opening up
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we defend we close off we take
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everything
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personally it's so hard for us to see
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things with logic with more
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acceptance with more love with with an
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attitude of letting things go just let
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it be Live and Let Live Freedom that's
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so hard freedom is scary freedom is not
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safe that's what we
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learned but
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love love is what's always there in the
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world if we're open to receiving it and
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we cannot receive love if we're always
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in our mind so I feel like this video is
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really really long um if you're watching
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this on Instagram if you're watching
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this um there's probably going to be a
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part two where I actually tell about
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what I'm currently doing to make money
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after that you have full time job the
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way that I make money now it's been 6
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years um yeah it's been about 6 years
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since I left my full-time job which I
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was in for six years and I'm no longer
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making
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income um stable income every month and
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yes it is unstable and the first I guess
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six months that I was doing YouTube I
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was not really making an income and then
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one video really boosted my channel I
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think the first video that really went
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viral was the video on Uranus in Taurus
00:19:01
you're a Taurus girl here so I made a
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video about Uranus going to Taurus and
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that was the first video that sort of
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like got people coming to my
00:19:09
channel but um yes I make income from
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YouTube but you know that's not a lot
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currently um yeah I think I just have a
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variety of different content here and I
00:19:21
think the moment I included human design
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or genan keys in it you know people were
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kind of like oh I just want to watch
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astrology I'm not really sure about
00:19:27
human design or Gene keys and on how
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many people are
00:19:30
watching and but it's okay because I
00:19:32
don't believe in doing just astrology I
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believe that every astrologer needs to
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know human design needs to know gen Keys
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it is almost like crucial but anyways
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that is just my
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belief I believe it works that way it
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you can go much deeper when you know
00:19:44
human design Genies you get a more
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holistic understanding of someone and so
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I'm not going to take that off of my
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channel I just kept doing it I kept
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doing jenies and human design and then I
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make money from doing readings for
00:19:54
clients I got my first client um Mid
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around April of 2019 that's when I had
00:20:02
been doing my astrology channel for
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about 6 months so the first 6 months was
00:20:06
just creating content and putting out
00:20:09
content consistently at least once a
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week sometimes I put out content two to
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three times a week and then I started
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getting
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clients and of course I was doing
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readings and I remember my first ever
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reading it took me like a week just to
00:20:23
understand the chart made all the notes
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and then I made a a recorded you know
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video was like a one hour video but it
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took me a week to make that my first
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reading and I didn't make that much
00:20:31
money but then things really peaked when
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I um during covid because I think a lot
00:20:36
more people are beginning to look in
00:20:40
wordss um question life question their
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purpose and so reading started coming in
00:20:45
during the covid period and that's when
00:20:47
I was actually making really good money
00:20:48
and I was living in Thailand at the time
00:20:50
so it was way more money than I needed
00:20:53
to be able to live in
00:20:55
Bangkok but then Co kind of died off and
00:20:58
then you know my profits started going
00:21:01
down as
00:21:02
well um and then I moved to the
00:21:06
Netherlands to be with my partner
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currently and that changed things a
00:21:12
little bit because the cost of living
00:21:14
here is a
00:21:15
lot uh more expensive of course so I
00:21:19
have to think of other ways that I could
00:21:21
make an
00:21:22
income and so um I've been fting with
00:21:26
that a little bit so that's kind of
00:21:27
where I'm at right now now is how else
00:21:29
can I make an income and then um my
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father passed away in
00:21:34
2022 and then he left me with a piece of
00:21:38
land back in Bangkok which took us a
00:21:40
while but we eventually managed to sell
00:21:43
the land so a real bit of real a bit of
00:21:46
real estate coming in here with um my
00:21:49
moon in the second house in astrology so
00:21:52
that makes a lot of sense why I would be
00:21:53
making some income from property but the
00:21:57
money that I made from that a lot of it
00:21:59
um is put into the bank so that I can
00:22:03
gain um interest um quarterly you know
00:22:08
interest so that's kind of like a
00:22:10
passive so YouTube is passive income um
00:22:13
getting interest from the bank is like
00:22:14
passive income um readings is not
00:22:17
passive that's something that's of
00:22:18
course much more active and some of that
00:22:20
money I also gave to my mom to you know
00:22:23
let her live her life and to build her a
00:22:26
house in Bangkok a nice place place for
00:22:28
her to
00:22:30
live and
00:22:32
um and a part of that money also goes
00:22:35
into investing a home that I'm buying
00:22:37
here in the Netherlands with my
00:22:38
boyfriend in the forest which is where
00:22:40
we're going to be moving oh more on that
00:22:42
later very excited about that um and yes
00:22:46
so now I'm also collaborating with
00:22:48
certain brands so I'm getting free
00:22:51
products and things which is another
00:22:53
really interesting path that I'm going
00:22:54
down is this path of exchange it's like
00:22:59
so instead of having to go out buy
00:23:01
clothes I'm getting free clothes right
00:23:04
so it's cut it's cutting out some of the
00:23:06
expenses there collaborating with
00:23:08
Resorts and hotels um more on that later
00:23:11
because I'm still in the process of that
00:23:13
but there you know it's going somewhere
00:23:15
very exciting so I could travel you know
00:23:18
without having to pay all the costs of
00:23:19
my travel right so reducing expenses on
00:23:22
that part
00:23:24
too and I have a couple more ideas of
00:23:26
various different income streams that I
00:23:28
do um want to be working on in the near
00:23:31
and upcoming future so you're going to
00:23:33
be hearing more about that but yeah I
00:23:36
think the idea here is that when it
00:23:39
really comes to money there isn't just
00:23:42
one way to make money and um of course
00:23:46
coming from you know a background and an
00:23:48
entire family you know my whole family
00:23:50
earned income that was consistent my dad
00:23:54
worked for the government my sister
00:23:55
works for the government they have an
00:23:56
consistent income so there was was
00:23:58
nobody to teach me how to do it so I
00:24:01
have to figure it out by myself and I
00:24:03
don't have a lot of money to invest in
00:24:04
like you know a course which these
00:24:05
courses can cost a lot too right so you
00:24:08
know or a mentor to help me with that so
00:24:10
they cost a lot and so I'm kind of like
00:24:13
doing things on my own first and if it
00:24:14
really doesn't work then I would go down
00:24:16
that route but seems to be working out
00:24:19
with doing brand collaborations and um
00:24:23
affiliate marketing and things like that
00:24:25
um it's yeah it's I just started this
00:24:27
journey and I'm very excited to see
00:24:28
where it's going by the way but my point
00:24:31
here is that what I do to make an income
00:24:36
is finding different streams of income
00:24:40
so it doesn't just come from one thing
00:24:43
and it's something that I experiment
00:24:44
with I explore with and I'm open to life
00:24:48
and I think that it's really important
00:24:51
that I allow life to come to me to and
00:24:55
show me the path like for example this
00:24:58
land that I sold life showed me this
00:25:00
path you know starting a YouTube
00:25:04
channel was a result of receiving an
00:25:06
invitation from the universe to start a
00:25:08
YouTube channel when I get a reading
00:25:10
from a client is because the client
00:25:12
really sees me really recognizes my
00:25:14
talents and they're coming to me and I
00:25:16
receive all of this yeah as a projector
00:25:18
right in human
00:25:19
design so learning this is allowing me
00:25:23
to tune into the near and upcoming
00:25:26
future of generating more
00:25:28
income streams that you know will come
00:25:30
my way like with these brand
00:25:32
collaborations that I'm doing some of
00:25:34
them reach out to me you know some of
00:25:36
them are invitations from like my
00:25:39
boyfriend he was like oh check out this
00:25:40
brand they have an A brand
00:25:42
ambassadorship program and I'm like oh
00:25:44
that's an invitation let's take it you
00:25:45
know but some of them I am reaching out
00:25:47
as well but I reach out only when I'm
00:25:50
sensing that our values are aligning
00:25:52
right sometimes I'm sing out the
00:25:53
invitation but only when I really feel
00:25:54
like there's a connection there like
00:25:56
we're aligning our values of course
00:26:01
and you know I feel free life is so much
00:26:05
Freer this way is when I view the world
00:26:08
from a place of possibility
00:26:12
trust safety thriving rather than
00:26:16
surviving it's so much Freer and I am
00:26:20
not scared and yes some days I'm scared
00:26:22
some days I'm like oh my God I'm going
00:26:24
to run out of money in my bank account
00:26:26
but I don't because the universe gives
00:26:29
you the right opportunity at the right
00:26:31
time the universe is not going to allow
00:26:33
you to go homeless you got friends you
00:26:36
got family if you do if you don't you
00:26:39
got friends you got find a community of
00:26:41
people that can be there to support you
00:26:44
you're not alone in this world open up
00:26:46
ask for help if you need to you know be
00:26:48
vulnerable
00:26:51
right um yeah but at the same time like
00:26:55
if you're staying with people or with a
00:26:58
person person just because it's it's
00:27:00
codependency yeah then then don't do
00:27:02
that you know but um
00:27:05
yeah
00:27:07
and there are days yeah there are days
00:27:09
when it does feel scary but like I said
00:27:12
the universe always has your back and so
00:27:14
most of the time I do feel free now I
00:27:17
can
00:27:17
do what I want when I want like every
00:27:20
single day there's no oh my God I got to
00:27:22
go to class you know oh my god um I
00:27:24
can't go to the toilet yet I go to the
00:27:26
toilet when I want to go to the toilet
00:27:30
I work when I want to work and I do want
00:27:32
to work every day you know I think that
00:27:34
we all do like when we're passionate
00:27:35
about what we're doing we show up and
00:27:38
there isn't anything that I'm doing
00:27:41
now and by now I mean I would say the
00:27:44
last few months um there was at the
00:27:47
beginning it it did feel like I've got a
00:27:49
hustle you know but that was because I
00:27:51
got to get my YouTube channel going I
00:27:53
got to get my Instagram account going
00:27:55
that felt like a bit of um a rush hustle
00:27:59
and especially when I get readings at
00:28:00
the beginning felt like this is so hard
00:28:02
to do I've got to spend so much time to
00:28:04
plan it but now doing a reading is
00:28:07
easy so now everything that I'm doing I
00:28:10
actually want to do from the bottom of
00:28:11
my heart and if there something that I
00:28:14
have to do in my day and I just don't
00:28:15
want to do it I try to be have a bigger
00:28:18
perspective of it and if I really don't
00:28:20
want to do it and I don't have to do it
00:28:22
I don't do it and there's a lot of
00:28:25
things that you don't actually have to
00:28:26
do and I have I'm and I feel very
00:28:28
blessed to have a lot of people in my
00:28:30
life right now that understand that you
00:28:33
know I'm so blessed to to have people
00:28:36
that are my soul sisters that understand
00:28:38
the feminine way and that is only
00:28:41
possible because I put myself out there
00:28:44
I make YouTube videos I make Instagram
00:28:45
videos I call in My
00:28:47
Tribe I I open the door to have
00:28:50
invitations coming
00:28:52
in
00:28:55
so yeah I mean if you guys are watching
00:28:58
this and you're experiencing something
00:29:00
similar I got you we got you here
00:29:02
there's a tribe here for
00:29:05
you there's a community
00:29:07
here and I'm looking to yet to find a
00:29:10
ways for maybe all of us to actually be
00:29:12
able to connect but I need to listen to
00:29:14
my heart I need to go with my own flow
00:29:15
with of things with that and see what
00:29:17
works for both me and you guys of course
00:29:19
but find your tribe you're never alone
00:29:23
you'll never be alone love is out there
00:29:25
in the world for you
00:29:28
you got this you'll be
00:29:30
okay you'll
00:29:32
be
00:29:34
okay you'll be
00:29:38
okay all right I'm sending you guys so
00:29:40
much love
00:29:41
today bye
00:29:44
[Music]