Study yourself to become confident

00:27:32
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wp6pKza6HZ0

Resumo

TLDRThe video by Liz focuses on self-discovery and how to achieve ultimate confidence by understanding who you are and what you stand for. It emphasizes the importance of redefining self-perceptions shaped by societal expectations and biases, and suggests therapy as a route for deep personal understanding and transformation. Liz advocates for implementing strong personal boundaries and identifying non-negotiables, especially in relationships, to maintain respect and authenticity. The video highlights the distortion of dopamine receptors in modern society and encourages viewers to identify their triggers to heal past wounds authentically. Through anecdotes, Liz stresses the necessity to live in the present, as it decreases anxiety and increases life's fulfillment. Lastly, she discusses the power of self-belief, urging individuals to take full responsibility for their lives and not succumb to victimhood. The video underlines the notion that we should surround ourselves with people who contribute positively to our lives, fostering true self-growth and happiness.

Conclusões

  • 🔑 Discover who you truly are for ultimate confidence.
  • 🧠 Redefine self-perceptions shaped by others.
  • 🔗 Set strong boundaries and identify non-negotiables.
  • 💊 Understand the impact of dopamine on excitement.
  • 📚 Therapy can aid personal growth and self-awareness.
  • 🌿 Live in the present to alleviate anxiety.
  • 💪 Take responsibility for personal empowerment.
  • 🥰 Surround yourself with supportive, positive people.
  • 🌟 Believe in yourself to achieve any goal.
  • 🔄 Break away from repeated negative patterns.
  • 🧩 Healing comes from understanding triggers.
  • 🕊️ Strive for authentic self-living, free from societal pressures.

Linha do tempo

  • 00:00:00 - 00:05:00

    To unlock ultimate confidence, understanding oneself is key. This involves recognizing personal likes, dislikes, and boundaries, which fosters self-awareness and authenticity. Therapy with platforms like BetterHelp can assist with this self-discovery by offering unbiased support from numerous therapists, enabling people to explore their needs from home comfortably.

  • 00:05:00 - 00:10:00

    Our identity is primarily shaped by external influences like family and societal standards, but it's crucial to redefine it by changing how we perceive and talk to ourselves. We can alter negative beliefs instilled in childhood by reaffirming positive truths about ourselves, thus controlling our own perception and enhancing our happiness and self-worth.

  • 00:10:00 - 00:15:00

    Being true to oneself requires understanding innate desires and setting clear non-negotiables in relationships and life in general, such as fidelity and respectful workplace conduct. These boundaries foster self-respect and confidence. It's important to be aware of one's actions and reactions, as they determine personal and relational growth.

  • 00:15:00 - 00:20:00

    Understanding triggers and past wounds is vital for personal growth. Therapy can help identify these triggers and change detrimental patterns. Life's repeating patterns often indicate unresolved issues needing attention. Resolving these and taking responsibility for personal healing empowers individuals to overcome past traumas and thrive.

  • 00:20:00 - 00:27:32

    Surrounding oneself with supportive individuals and environments enhances personal growth. Acknowledging influences from friends, media, and even subconscious patterns helps shape a fulfilling life. Recognizing repeat patterns in relationships and understanding personal triggers help in breaking cycles. Belief in oneself and living authentically lead to fulfillment.

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Vídeo de perguntas e respostas

  • What is the key to ultimate confidence?

    Getting to know who you are, what you like, and setting personal boundaries is key to ultimate confidence.

  • What does BetterHelp offer?

    BetterHelp offers online therapy with over 30,000 therapists accessible from home.

  • How can one change their self-perception?

    You can change self-perception by consciously altering your self-talk and affirming positive beliefs about yourself.

  • Why is it important to identify non-negotiables in relationships?

    Identifying non-negotiables helps maintain self-respect and ensures you do not compromise on your core values.

  • How do dopamine receptors affect our excitement levels?

    Worn-out dopamine receptors can lead to a lack of excitement, causing people to seek extreme experiences.

  • How can understanding your triggers benefit you?

    Understanding triggers helps realize they stem from past wounds and allows for conscious changes in behavior.

  • Why is living in the present emphasized?

    Living in the present reduces anxiety and stress, allowing you to appreciate and build a fulfilling life now.

  • How does blame affect self-responsibility?

    Blame takes away your power, while taking responsibility empowers you to change your life for the better.

  • Why is it crucial to choose supportive people around you?

    Surrounding yourself with supportive people fuels positivity and helps you maintain a fulfilling lifestyle.

  • What role does self-belief play in achieving personal goals?

    Believing in yourself allows you to pursue and achieve your goals, independent of others' opinions.

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  • 00:00:00
    listen if you want to unlock Ultimate
  • 00:00:02
    confidence if you want to feel like your
  • 00:00:05
    authentic self and vibrate on the
  • 00:00:07
    highest level you need to get to know
  • 00:00:10
    who you are you need to get to know what
  • 00:00:13
    you like what you don't like what you
  • 00:00:15
    accept what you will not accept this is
  • 00:00:18
    the whole key the biggest thing in life
  • 00:00:20
    that you should study is you is your
  • 00:00:23
    behaviors it's how you act once you know
  • 00:00:27
    who you are no one can tell you anything
  • 00:00:30
    want to say a huge thank you for
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    betterhelp for sponsoring this video
  • 00:00:34
    betterhelp is an online therapy platform
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    with over 30,000 therapists the
  • 00:00:39
    therapists are there to give you
  • 00:00:41
    unbiased and helpful advice with any
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    issue that you might be facing there are
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    so many therapists at your disposal that
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    you can choose from and if you don't
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    like the therapist that you are matched
  • 00:00:53
    up with better help gives you the option
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    to switch therapist with no additional
  • 00:00:57
    charge which in real life honestly that
  • 00:01:00
    would not happen so if you don't know
  • 00:01:02
    where to begin to find a therapist or
  • 00:01:05
    where to even look at and you don't want
  • 00:01:07
    to leave your house better help is the
  • 00:01:09
    best platform for that because it's all
  • 00:01:12
    out of the comfort of your own home you
  • 00:01:14
    can just browse and look at different
  • 00:01:17
    options to get start you fill out a
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    questionnaire to help assess your
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    specific needs and then you'll get
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    matched with a therapist in as little as
  • 00:01:23
    a few days you can schedule video phone
  • 00:01:25
    or message based sessions whatever you
  • 00:01:27
    are most comfortable with so let better
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    help connect you with a therapist all
  • 00:01:31
    out of the comfort of your own home you
  • 00:01:34
    can do this by visiting the link in
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    description or betterhelp.com
  • 00:01:40
    wizardz what you can also do is click on
  • 00:01:43
    Wizard Liz during sign up and you will
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    enjoy a special discount with your first
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    month hi guys my name is Liz and welcome
  • 00:01:51
    back to my channel okay let's get into
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    it first things first need you to
  • 00:01:56
    realize is that there is no self so what
  • 00:01:59
    you are right now is just made of
  • 00:02:02
    beliefs by your parents by the people
  • 00:02:04
    around you by your friends Society
  • 00:02:05
    whatever right I think a lot of times if
  • 00:02:08
    for example beauty standards if they
  • 00:02:10
    weren't there a lot of people wouldn't
  • 00:02:12
    look how they look right now because
  • 00:02:14
    there there's nothing to look up to or
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    to follow a lot of people wouldn't do
  • 00:02:18
    certain jobs because it's it's not like
  • 00:02:20
    oh that's accepted in society and that
  • 00:02:22
    other job is shamed in society like made
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    up in a societal structure that we
  • 00:02:27
    follow unconsciously and consciously
  • 00:02:30
    what I love about that is that when
  • 00:02:32
    there is no self we can also change it
  • 00:02:35
    and we can become who we feel is most
  • 00:02:38
    authentic and makes us the most happy
  • 00:02:40
    and how we do that is by first of all
  • 00:02:43
    changing the way you talk to yourself
  • 00:02:45
    see your whole life your parents have
  • 00:02:47
    told you things about yourself your
  • 00:02:49
    friends have told you things about
  • 00:02:50
    yourself and in childhood you adapted
  • 00:02:52
    those traits as who you are so for
  • 00:02:54
    example when I was very young I was told
  • 00:02:56
    that I wasn't smart okay by one of my
  • 00:02:58
    Abus parents like you're not smart
  • 00:03:00
    whatever shut up blah blah a woman
  • 00:03:01
    should never talk and then I started to
  • 00:03:04
    now even in adulthood I doubt my
  • 00:03:06
    intelligence because of what I was told
  • 00:03:08
    in childhood but now I reaffirm to
  • 00:03:12
    myself no you are smart you know so much
  • 00:03:14
    you have so much knowledge and I
  • 00:03:16
    reaffirmed that to myself to change
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    those beliefs because I want to control
  • 00:03:21
    what I believe and I want to shape who I
  • 00:03:23
    am to myself the same way when you were
  • 00:03:25
    younger and someone told you you're not
  • 00:03:27
    beautiful you're not good-looking later
  • 00:03:28
    in life you will always remember that
  • 00:03:30
    unconsciously and you be like insecure
  • 00:03:32
    about your looks or think like oh this
  • 00:03:33
    is not good enough and all these things
  • 00:03:35
    you can tell yourself right now that you
  • 00:03:37
    are you can look at yourself right now
  • 00:03:39
    and be like you are the most gorgeous
  • 00:03:42
    hottest thing on earth like wow when I
  • 00:03:45
    look at you I am mesmerized you can tell
  • 00:03:47
    yourself these things and even when you
  • 00:03:49
    say like oh no I don't believe it I
  • 00:03:51
    don't want to say it why don't you
  • 00:03:52
    believe it beauty is a madeup societal
  • 00:03:55
    structure right for a lot of people
  • 00:03:59
    people that are even considered
  • 00:04:00
    beautiful let's say to you are not
  • 00:04:01
    beautiful to other people you know you
  • 00:04:03
    know how many times I heard that I'm not
  • 00:04:04
    good-looking and all these things and I
  • 00:04:06
    see why they think that because it's
  • 00:04:08
    their perception and I'm probably not
  • 00:04:10
    their type and I don't care to be their
  • 00:04:12
    type but does that mean that I when I
  • 00:04:14
    look in the mirror I have to say that to
  • 00:04:15
    myself or I have to say their
  • 00:04:18
    affirmation of their perception of me to
  • 00:04:21
    myself no I can create my own perception
  • 00:04:25
    my own world my own character of who I
  • 00:04:27
    am another thing you should ask yourself
  • 00:04:29
    is are you acting or are you reacting to
  • 00:04:31
    life so I actually had this conversation
  • 00:04:33
    with my therapist and she was like Liz
  • 00:04:36
    you are very sensitive so whenever
  • 00:04:38
    someone comes up to you and asks you
  • 00:04:40
    like let's say let's go for a coffee
  • 00:04:41
    let's go on a date whatever she's like
  • 00:04:43
    because you're so sensitive you might
  • 00:04:45
    think in your head like H you know what
  • 00:04:46
    yeah let's go let's see what where it
  • 00:04:48
    takes me and maybe this is the person
  • 00:04:50
    but she's like you should start acting
  • 00:04:52
    and you should like connect to your
  • 00:04:54
    heart and think to yourself is this what
  • 00:04:57
    I want H that moment you should really
  • 00:04:59
    ask yourself am I saying yes to this
  • 00:05:02
    thing or to this invitation because I
  • 00:05:04
    really want to go or am I scared to
  • 00:05:06
    disappoint people do I feel bad for them
  • 00:05:09
    and that's why I'm saying yes when you
  • 00:05:11
    know that when you're saying yes it's
  • 00:05:13
    authentic to what you want to do you'll
  • 00:05:14
    become more confident when you know that
  • 00:05:16
    when you're saying no it's authentic to
  • 00:05:18
    what you want to do you'll become
  • 00:05:20
    confident because you are living in
  • 00:05:23
    accordance to your own voice another
  • 00:05:25
    thing is think about what are your
  • 00:05:27
    non-negotiables so let's say for example
  • 00:05:30
    for me in a relationship if my partner
  • 00:05:33
    is not loyal that's it my partner knows
  • 00:05:36
    and I know I will not stay there and I
  • 00:05:38
    will not take this relationship
  • 00:05:39
    seriously anymore that's my
  • 00:05:41
    non-negotiable I do not budge on that I
  • 00:05:44
    stand on it I do not care why let's say
  • 00:05:47
    there is a couple right and they both
  • 00:05:48
    decide okay we're going to be loyal
  • 00:05:50
    we're going to be in a trusting
  • 00:05:51
    relationship when one of that person
  • 00:05:54
    breaks that trust it's traumatizing for
  • 00:05:56
    that other person because now they're
  • 00:05:58
    going to take that on to their next
  • 00:05:59
    relationship and start to distrust other
  • 00:06:02
    people because it's like a sudden shock
  • 00:06:04
    and I don't think people realize how
  • 00:06:06
    cheating is a big trauma for a person
  • 00:06:08
    for example in work you can think about
  • 00:06:10
    okay if the boss is making rude comments
  • 00:06:13
    whatever is that you're non-negotiable
  • 00:06:15
    are you thinking no I will not accept
  • 00:06:17
    that we cannot compromise on this I will
  • 00:06:19
    leave the more you have your
  • 00:06:22
    non-negotiables clear for you and you
  • 00:06:24
    know that this I will accept this I
  • 00:06:26
    won't accept and you stand on those
  • 00:06:28
    boundaries that is the more you will
  • 00:06:30
    feel confident about yourself and the
  • 00:06:32
    people around you will also start to
  • 00:06:34
    respect you more a person that says if
  • 00:06:38
    you cheat on me and and I discover that
  • 00:06:42
    and they leave that is a
  • 00:06:45
    person that is forever will be respected
  • 00:06:48
    okay even by the other person because no
  • 00:06:50
    matter what they do they can cry they
  • 00:06:53
    can they can they can beg they can do
  • 00:06:55
    anything for them but this person has so
  • 00:06:57
    much selfworth has so much much boundary
  • 00:07:00
    know there's one thing about women that
  • 00:07:03
    I've
  • 00:07:03
    noticed doesn't matter how long she
  • 00:07:06
    stayed with you doesn't matter how many
  • 00:07:07
    years she put up with things once a
  • 00:07:09
    woman in her head makes that switch of
  • 00:07:13
    this is not what I want anymore she can
  • 00:07:15
    even have stayed there for 25 years in
  • 00:07:17
    this relationship okay once she knows in
  • 00:07:19
    her head this is not what I want anymore
  • 00:07:21
    I will not accept any further than this
  • 00:07:24
    you can go take a hike this woman will
  • 00:07:29
    not come back to you once a woman knows
  • 00:07:32
    in her head you're not that person
  • 00:07:34
    anymore she will not even be able to
  • 00:07:35
    look at you the same it will never ever
  • 00:07:38
    come back I respect that so much I
  • 00:07:41
    respect it like no no matter how many
  • 00:07:43
    years it took no matter whatever it took
  • 00:07:46
    for you to leave once a woman leaves she
  • 00:07:49
    will boss up you will never recognize
  • 00:07:54
    her anymore all the pain you put her
  • 00:07:56
    through doesn't matter this woman will
  • 00:07:58
    always come out on top we live in a
  • 00:08:01
    society where our dopamine receptors in
  • 00:08:04
    the brain are very worn out and that's
  • 00:08:06
    dangerous when that happens because when
  • 00:08:09
    your dopamine receptors are worn out
  • 00:08:11
    nothing becomes exciting anymore so
  • 00:08:13
    people go to the extreme to feel a
  • 00:08:15
    certain sense of excitement you can see
  • 00:08:18
    this for example with people that from a
  • 00:08:20
    very young age started drinking because
  • 00:08:22
    alcoholism is so normal in this world
  • 00:08:25
    and it's almost pushed upon everyone you
  • 00:08:27
    know and I feel like because they
  • 00:08:29
    normalize this later on because they've
  • 00:08:32
    been drinking for so long they start to
  • 00:08:34
    use like heavier substances and then
  • 00:08:37
    later on these substances also don't do
  • 00:08:39
    anything anymore so now you have a lot
  • 00:08:42
    of people that are addicted since they
  • 00:08:44
    were teenager and somehow we're all
  • 00:08:47
    normalizing this their dopamine
  • 00:08:49
    receptors are completely worn out and
  • 00:08:51
    they're depressed and don't feel any
  • 00:08:53
    excitement anymore for anything in the
  • 00:08:55
    world also look at what is triggering
  • 00:08:57
    you and where is that coming from when I
  • 00:09:01
    was younger in school I used to hate
  • 00:09:04
    when teachers would tell me what to do
  • 00:09:06
    and I would never even take it seriously
  • 00:09:09
    why because at home I was constantly
  • 00:09:11
    controlled I wasn't allowed to have a
  • 00:09:13
    voice so the only thing I've ever wanted
  • 00:09:16
    was freedom to speak my mind and to say
  • 00:09:18
    what I want and just to be free okay so
  • 00:09:21
    when at school I was also controlled
  • 00:09:24
    that would trigger me but but that was
  • 00:09:26
    triggering the wound that I had back
  • 00:09:28
    home
  • 00:09:29
    and I needed to realize these things so
  • 00:09:32
    I could stop acting in a way and hurting
  • 00:09:35
    other people that had nothing to do with
  • 00:09:37
    it I had to go back to the base of where
  • 00:09:39
    is this coming from so I could work on
  • 00:09:42
    that and that I could live in a way
  • 00:09:44
    where I can respect others and honestly
  • 00:09:46
    therapy has helped me a lot with that
  • 00:09:48
    because when I was when I talked to my
  • 00:09:51
    therapists it was always about okay Liz
  • 00:09:54
    where are you going wrong what are you
  • 00:09:57
    doing that these situations keep
  • 00:09:59
    happening again so that we can fix it
  • 00:10:01
    and actually change your life instead of
  • 00:10:05
    because people often think that
  • 00:10:06
    therapists sit there and will just
  • 00:10:07
    listen to you and act like you're good
  • 00:10:09
    and that's it no they will make you take
  • 00:10:12
    accountability and change your life I
  • 00:10:14
    think what is also so important about
  • 00:10:16
    understanding your triggers is that it
  • 00:10:19
    makes you understand that you're not
  • 00:10:22
    crazy it makes you understand that
  • 00:10:24
    you're not a bad person but you're just
  • 00:10:26
    acting out of past wounds and I think
  • 00:10:29
    that's beautiful I think that's putting
  • 00:10:31
    sanity inside of your mind and being
  • 00:10:33
    like you know what I'm not an aggressive
  • 00:10:35
    person I'm just hurt and I've been hurt
  • 00:10:38
    so many times that the only way my body
  • 00:10:42
    is reacting right now is out of
  • 00:10:43
    aggression because the moments that I
  • 00:10:45
    was hurt I couldn't speak up for myself
  • 00:10:47
    or I didn't say it so this is all P pent
  • 00:10:50
    up anger and resentment that's coming
  • 00:10:53
    out as an aggressive person but that
  • 00:10:55
    doesn't have to be me that doesn't have
  • 00:10:57
    to Define me and you can change that
  • 00:11:00
    when you understand where it's coming
  • 00:11:01
    from it's good to acknowledge your
  • 00:11:03
    feelings I think the way people can heal
  • 00:11:06
    is when they are in touch with their
  • 00:11:08
    feelings and emotions and when they
  • 00:11:09
    don't demonize it the reason why you're
  • 00:11:12
    sad is because you're hurt it's not
  • 00:11:14
    because you're weak it's not because oh
  • 00:11:16
    you're not strong enough to handle it no
  • 00:11:19
    something hurt you and it's okay to cry
  • 00:11:22
    it out because that's how you release
  • 00:11:24
    whatever has hurt you but if you hold it
  • 00:11:26
    in people get physically ill from this
  • 00:11:29
    people even die from illnesses by
  • 00:11:32
    holding on to this pent up anger
  • 00:11:34
    resentment and stress release it if it's
  • 00:11:38
    crying for months release it that's the
  • 00:11:41
    way you release okay whatever you have
  • 00:11:43
    to do in whatever way release it if it's
  • 00:11:47
    talking about it constantly over and
  • 00:11:49
    over again until you're done talking
  • 00:11:51
    about then do that do that I've told the
  • 00:11:53
    same stories maybe 100 times but now I'm
  • 00:11:56
    done telling those stories because it's
  • 00:11:57
    out of my system thing is look at the
  • 00:12:00
    patterns in your life that are repeating
  • 00:12:02
    itself over and over again because that
  • 00:12:04
    is teaching you where your healing lies
  • 00:12:07
    okay I've had multiple patterns repeat
  • 00:12:10
    I've had my uh father in my life that
  • 00:12:13
    was abusive and then I attracted my ex
  • 00:12:15
    partner that was exactly a replica of my
  • 00:12:18
    father in the beginning it was great and
  • 00:12:19
    then it turned out to be he's just like
  • 00:12:21
    my dad okay now why was this pattern
  • 00:12:24
    coming up because I still had not come
  • 00:12:27
    to terms with what happened with my
  • 00:12:29
    father so it came back to me in a
  • 00:12:32
    relationship form so I can see it in
  • 00:12:35
    front of myself and I almost felt like I
  • 00:12:38
    was recreating my mother's and father's
  • 00:12:40
    relationship with my ex partner and when
  • 00:12:43
    I understood that and I was like wow but
  • 00:12:46
    this is not what I want cuz if I have a
  • 00:12:48
    child she will just be a little Liz
  • 00:12:51
    again with the same traumas I don't want
  • 00:12:53
    that for my child so that's when I said
  • 00:12:56
    you know what no I don't want to
  • 00:12:58
    continue this I want to stop the cycle
  • 00:13:00
    of the same patterns happening again
  • 00:13:03
    even in friendships even in
  • 00:13:04
    relationships look at these people and
  • 00:13:06
    ask yourself are they repeating
  • 00:13:09
    themselves over and over again am I
  • 00:13:12
    experiencing the same thing over and
  • 00:13:13
    over again then start thinking okay what
  • 00:13:15
    is my lesson
  • 00:13:17
    here why am I attracting the constant
  • 00:13:20
    same person over and over again and you
  • 00:13:23
    should instead of blaming take
  • 00:13:25
    responsibility for your life okay I in
  • 00:13:28
    my my life it's very easy to say you
  • 00:13:31
    know what my life is because I had
  • 00:13:33
    an abusive father no I took
  • 00:13:36
    responsibility for my life I could have
  • 00:13:38
    blamed him all day but it doesn't matter
  • 00:13:40
    now does it cuz it's in the past what I
  • 00:13:43
    did with my life afterwards was all up
  • 00:13:45
    to me and because I took the
  • 00:13:46
    responsibility and I was like Liz you
  • 00:13:48
    know what you're going to work on
  • 00:13:49
    yourself you're going to become the best
  • 00:13:51
    version of yourself you're going to
  • 00:13:53
    become one of the strongest adults
  • 00:13:55
    you've ever seen that's going to protect
  • 00:13:57
    your inner child when I did that that's
  • 00:13:59
    when I became
  • 00:14:00
    successful that's when I had everything
  • 00:14:03
    because I refused I refused to just
  • 00:14:07
    succumb to the abuse to just be like
  • 00:14:11
    it's your fault and I'm going to be the
  • 00:14:12
    victim here I was never the victim I was
  • 00:14:15
    never the victim I was always going to
  • 00:14:17
    be the person that was going to come out
  • 00:14:19
    on top no matter what in any situation
  • 00:14:21
    in any situation you put me in I will
  • 00:14:24
    come out on top no matter what
  • 00:14:26
    responsibility gives you the power over
  • 00:14:28
    your life life and blame takes it away
  • 00:14:31
    blame gives that abuser or that person
  • 00:14:33
    that was bad to you or whatever they did
  • 00:14:35
    to that gives them power but you have
  • 00:14:38
    that power when you take responsibility
  • 00:14:40
    and I like you know what whatever you
  • 00:14:41
    did to me how many times you lied to me
  • 00:14:44
    how many times you cheated I am still
  • 00:14:46
    going to come out on top when you do
  • 00:14:48
    that you
  • 00:14:49
    win you win and don't become addicted to
  • 00:14:54
    your suffering a lot of you guys are so
  • 00:14:56
    addicted to feeling that sensation ation
  • 00:14:59
    of that stress again a lot of people
  • 00:15:01
    around me even that also come from
  • 00:15:03
    abusive childhood they act constant new
  • 00:15:05
    drama they create for themselves
  • 00:15:07
    constantly because that's the only thing
  • 00:15:09
    they knew and that's what they're kind
  • 00:15:11
    of addicted to that feeling of that Rush
  • 00:15:13
    again that drama again but don't don't
  • 00:15:16
    become addicted to it have some you know
  • 00:15:19
    what start to realize I'm not that
  • 00:15:22
    person anymore I'm not that abused child
  • 00:15:26
    I'm not that that that that person that
  • 00:15:28
    was cheated on I'm not that person
  • 00:15:30
    anymore I'm a different person now I
  • 00:15:31
    don't need to create those situations
  • 00:15:33
    again for myself I don't need to fight
  • 00:15:35
    like I used to my life is calm now my
  • 00:15:38
    life is peaceful and start to make that
  • 00:15:40
    your reality say like you know what now
  • 00:15:42
    I have a good life I'm I have a great
  • 00:15:45
    life actually you know start to say that
  • 00:15:47
    to yourself and start to acknowledge
  • 00:15:49
    that that's the past what has happened
  • 00:15:52
    has happened that doesn't Define me
  • 00:15:54
    today that's not who I am today and you
  • 00:15:57
    guys are not going to treat me like
  • 00:15:58
    that's who who I am today also start to
  • 00:16:00
    realize that who feeds you and who takes
  • 00:16:03
    from you okay so when I was a lot around
  • 00:16:06
    my previous partner I started to think
  • 00:16:10
    I'm depressed I'm depressed I'm sad like
  • 00:16:13
    I'm always sad I'm isolated this is who
  • 00:16:15
    I am that's what I constantly thought
  • 00:16:17
    but why did I think that because I
  • 00:16:19
    didn't have any friends or family around
  • 00:16:21
    me so I was alone with this person
  • 00:16:22
    constantly so they could just make my
  • 00:16:25
    mind in whoever they wanted to be and I
  • 00:16:27
    started to believe that this is just who
  • 00:16:28
    I I am but the minute I came and I
  • 00:16:32
    visited my family I reconnected with old
  • 00:16:34
    friends I realized I feel alive around
  • 00:16:38
    these people I feel like I want to live
  • 00:16:41
    and that's something that I haven't felt
  • 00:16:43
    in a very very long time because my
  • 00:16:47
    previous partner was just taking from me
  • 00:16:49
    taking taking taking and leaving me
  • 00:16:51
    empty but when I'm here now I'm starting
  • 00:16:54
    to realize it's an equal give and
  • 00:16:56
    exchange I don't feel sleepy around
  • 00:16:58
    these people I don't feel drained I
  • 00:17:00
    don't feel like I want to take my life I
  • 00:17:02
    feel like I want to live so when I
  • 00:17:05
    understood the difference and after that
  • 00:17:08
    I even think about like oh my previous
  • 00:17:10
    partner I'm like no I don't want to ever
  • 00:17:11
    do that again because I never want to
  • 00:17:14
    feel how I felt how bad I felt I want to
  • 00:17:18
    continue being around people who I can
  • 00:17:21
    give to and that give me the same way
  • 00:17:23
    back in an energetical sense always feel
  • 00:17:26
    it you will feel it when you feel
  • 00:17:29
    fulfilled when you come home from
  • 00:17:31
    someone let's say a friend and you feel
  • 00:17:32
    like oh my God I need to sleep for 10
  • 00:17:34
    days now that person has drained you
  • 00:17:36
    that's not your person you should feel
  • 00:17:38
    like oh my God I have so much energy you
  • 00:17:40
    know I I reconnected with this old
  • 00:17:42
    friend of mine and whenever I'm around
  • 00:17:44
    her I don't even need sleep we can go on
  • 00:17:46
    for days and days and days and we just
  • 00:17:48
    have fun so Choose Wisely who you
  • 00:17:50
    surround yourself with because that will
  • 00:17:52
    also shape who you
  • 00:17:54
    become I recently have been meeting a
  • 00:17:57
    lot of people and I came from isolation
  • 00:18:01
    to meeting a lot of people and I'm
  • 00:18:03
    starting to realize okay I want to hang
  • 00:18:05
    out with you but I wouldn't hang out
  • 00:18:07
    with you not because they're a bad
  • 00:18:08
    person but because their lifestyle
  • 00:18:10
    doesn't align with what I would want in
  • 00:18:11
    my life for example I've noticed that a
  • 00:18:14
    lot of people have alcohol addiction a
  • 00:18:16
    lot of people have substance addiction
  • 00:18:19
    especially now in this world and in the
  • 00:18:22
    age that we live in and I was looking at
  • 00:18:25
    that and they they party constantly and
  • 00:18:28
    all these things and I was thinking like
  • 00:18:29
    M you know if I become friends with you
  • 00:18:32
    like really close friends and we go out
  • 00:18:34
    and stuff I don't want that to become my
  • 00:18:36
    life because I can see how it would
  • 00:18:38
    distract me from my work and my purpose
  • 00:18:40
    in this world and I feel like I would
  • 00:18:42
    just get lost you know so I then choose
  • 00:18:46
    my friends like for example that old
  • 00:18:48
    friend I that I reconnected with she has
  • 00:18:50
    the same morals as me that's the same
  • 00:18:53
    kind of vibration I'm on if you choose
  • 00:18:55
    people that constantly like that aren't
  • 00:18:57
    really connected to them elves and want
  • 00:18:59
    to escape from reality because that's
  • 00:19:01
    what I truly think that alcohol subtance
  • 00:19:04
    all these things are you just don't want
  • 00:19:06
    to face reality you don't want to face
  • 00:19:07
    yourself so if you surround yourself
  • 00:19:09
    with people that constantly party do
  • 00:19:11
    that and I want to escape reality you'll
  • 00:19:14
    become the other person as well and
  • 00:19:16
    eventually you'll feel like you're
  • 00:19:17
    losing
  • 00:19:18
    yourself nothing in excess is good too
  • 00:19:22
    much of anything is bad for you think in
  • 00:19:24
    the long run if you hang out with people
  • 00:19:26
    you just become them you can even see
  • 00:19:28
    that physically
  • 00:19:29
    best friends and stuff they start to
  • 00:19:30
    look alike their Aura your aura gets
  • 00:19:32
    mixed and your energy get mixed if you
  • 00:19:35
    look at this person you think hm I would
  • 00:19:37
    not want to be like them I would not
  • 00:19:39
    want to live the way they live then
  • 00:19:41
    that's not your person and then you
  • 00:19:43
    choose people that do align to your
  • 00:19:46
    lifestyle and who you want to be also
  • 00:19:48
    start looking at what are people what
  • 00:19:51
    are books what are TV shows songs
  • 00:19:54
    teaching
  • 00:19:55
    you everywhere we look we have m
  • 00:19:58
    messages we have signs and it's almost
  • 00:20:02
    like God and the universe is constantly
  • 00:20:05
    talking to us but it's for us to really
  • 00:20:07
    open our eyes and look at the signs okay
  • 00:20:10
    so for example if you read a book right
  • 00:20:13
    now and if I read a book I will see that
  • 00:20:16
    book in my perspective and I will take
  • 00:20:19
    from that book what was important for me
  • 00:20:21
    and in my world you had a whole
  • 00:20:24
    different lesson from that book what was
  • 00:20:25
    important for you and your life and your
  • 00:20:28
    perspect perspective right that's how we
  • 00:20:30
    get those signs also like people that
  • 00:20:32
    come up to you like I recently met this
  • 00:20:35
    guy in the weirdest way possible such a
  • 00:20:38
    Divine thing okay he taught me a lot
  • 00:20:41
    about myself he was he taught me about
  • 00:20:43
    my attachment style in relationships and
  • 00:20:46
    he was like Liz you have avoidant
  • 00:20:48
    attachment style and I was like whoa
  • 00:20:51
    what is that and explain to me and it's
  • 00:20:53
    basically that when a person feels more
  • 00:20:55
    safe
  • 00:20:56
    alone they will like be in relationships
  • 00:21:00
    but they will never want to fully commit
  • 00:21:02
    and that's what I have so I will if
  • 00:21:04
    someone brings up marriage to me I get
  • 00:21:06
    scared okay I'm like no no I don't want
  • 00:21:07
    to do that but it's because in my head I
  • 00:21:10
    feel most safe when I'm alone because I
  • 00:21:13
    didn't have people around me when I was
  • 00:21:16
    younger that I could trust so when I
  • 00:21:18
    felt safe was when Liz was alone in her
  • 00:21:20
    room that's when I felt safe so I
  • 00:21:23
    constantly go back to that I never even
  • 00:21:25
    thought about my attachment style
  • 00:21:26
    because what I constantly ract are
  • 00:21:29
    anxious attachment people so these are
  • 00:21:32
    people that are have abandonment issues
  • 00:21:34
    they afraid of getting rejected they're
  • 00:21:36
    afraid of getting abandoned and because
  • 00:21:37
    of that trauma they get obsessed with me
  • 00:21:41
    because I kind of reject them I kind of
  • 00:21:43
    always hold this distance you know but
  • 00:21:46
    both of us are acting out of a trauma
  • 00:21:48
    response that was so interesting when
  • 00:21:50
    that person told all of this to me
  • 00:21:52
    because I was starting to realize when I
  • 00:21:55
    was meeting more people like I don't
  • 00:21:57
    like how they become so almost obsessed
  • 00:22:01
    or controlling over me immediately and
  • 00:22:03
    then I started to realize but I'm
  • 00:22:05
    attracting anxious people that all have
  • 00:22:08
    rejection wounds that have abandonment
  • 00:22:09
    wounds and because of the way I act with
  • 00:22:12
    with which is in a rejecting way they
  • 00:22:15
    become obsessed not because I'm a great
  • 00:22:17
    person but because I'm their trauma and
  • 00:22:20
    when I realize this I'm like oh my God
  • 00:22:22
    I'm I'm going to have to start to work
  • 00:22:23
    on my own issues so I won't attract
  • 00:22:26
    these people anymore because it's scary
  • 00:22:28
    but look how this person came into my
  • 00:22:30
    life to teach me that and for me to
  • 00:22:33
    change that you can also do is take a
  • 00:22:35
    paper and write down okay who am I what
  • 00:22:39
    do I love what don't I love what do I do
  • 00:22:42
    for fun what are my hobbies what were my
  • 00:22:44
    hobbies when I was younger how do I want
  • 00:22:47
    people to treat me how do I think that I
  • 00:22:50
    treat people these are all questions you
  • 00:22:53
    can write down and ask yourself and
  • 00:22:55
    you'll have all the answers you'll have
  • 00:22:56
    like this little example of who you are
  • 00:22:59
    as a person another thing is living in
  • 00:23:01
    the now and this is something my sister
  • 00:23:03
    has told me so many times lately because
  • 00:23:06
    I was like oh Sabina but I I want to
  • 00:23:08
    achieve this oh Saina in a month I'm
  • 00:23:10
    going to do this and she constantly
  • 00:23:12
    reminds me Liz live in the now just
  • 00:23:15
    think about now live your life right now
  • 00:23:17
    look at around you live now and
  • 00:23:20
    constantly because I'm reminded of that
  • 00:23:22
    I feel like I appreciate life more and
  • 00:23:26
    I'm not running from it I feel like my
  • 00:23:28
    my whole life I've just been running and
  • 00:23:31
    going to the next thing and that's why
  • 00:23:33
    I've never felt fulfilled by anything
  • 00:23:36
    because I'm not acknowledging it you
  • 00:23:38
    know I'm not acknowledging it yeah okay
  • 00:23:40
    I went viral I went viral on YouTube
  • 00:23:42
    amazing people would have thrown a party
  • 00:23:43
    because of it I was just like no what's
  • 00:23:45
    next what's next what's next that's why
  • 00:23:47
    I never realized what was happening
  • 00:23:49
    because I was never living in the now I
  • 00:23:50
    was always living in the future that's
  • 00:23:53
    how anxiety comes up that's how you have
  • 00:23:55
    more stress because you're constantly
  • 00:23:57
    thinking about the future but if if you
  • 00:23:58
    think right now what can I do now what
  • 00:24:00
    what I have what tools can I use and
  • 00:24:02
    what can I create now that's when you
  • 00:24:04
    create the future cuz the future doesn't
  • 00:24:06
    exist right past also doesn't exist what
  • 00:24:08
    we have is now when you don't appreciate
  • 00:24:11
    now nothing else will flourish good to
  • 00:24:14
    have goals but don't live for it don't
  • 00:24:16
    live for the future don't become a slave
  • 00:24:19
    of the future what people think about
  • 00:24:21
    you is none of your business people can
  • 00:24:24
    think whatever they want okay when you
  • 00:24:28
    put something out there when you create
  • 00:24:31
    something you will always attract people
  • 00:24:33
    on your vibration or that are meant to
  • 00:24:35
    see whatever you put out whether it's
  • 00:24:38
    positive or whether it's negative they
  • 00:24:40
    were meant to see what you put out there
  • 00:24:43
    you just have to create that's it all of
  • 00:24:46
    the rest doesn't matter because it's not
  • 00:24:48
    your business you will never control
  • 00:24:50
    their mind you will never control how
  • 00:24:52
    they think and that's just why would you
  • 00:24:53
    want to be in someone El's head be in
  • 00:24:55
    your own head think about your own stuff
  • 00:24:58
    why are you there be here be present
  • 00:25:01
    again once you start to realize that
  • 00:25:02
    what others think about you is none of
  • 00:25:04
    your business and whether you are the
  • 00:25:05
    best person on Earth they will not like
  • 00:25:07
    you still you can be the most PG nice
  • 00:25:11
    person ever and people will still have
  • 00:25:12
    something bad to say about you when you
  • 00:25:14
    accept that when you accept that you
  • 00:25:16
    know what criticism I love it it's a
  • 00:25:18
    part of life you have the good you have
  • 00:25:20
    the bad and it's beautiful both ways
  • 00:25:23
    when you accept that you live like
  • 00:25:24
    yourself authentically you're you don't
  • 00:25:26
    have any fear because you don't have
  • 00:25:27
    anything to to worry about I don't have
  • 00:25:29
    to why would I worry about millions of
  • 00:25:32
    people's brains why I don't have time
  • 00:25:34
    for that so I just put myself stff out
  • 00:25:36
    there and what what you think of it it's
  • 00:25:38
    up to you but somewhere you saw that
  • 00:25:42
    video of me because you needed that
  • 00:25:44
    whether it hurt you or whether it helped
  • 00:25:46
    you you needed that last but not least I
  • 00:25:48
    think believing in yourself is one of
  • 00:25:50
    the highest
  • 00:25:52
    ways of connecting with yourself you
  • 00:25:56
    know when everyone tells you like oh no
  • 00:25:58
    you don't deserve to have that you don't
  • 00:25:59
    deserve to have this and you tell
  • 00:26:01
    yourself but I do I want whatever I want
  • 00:26:04
    in life if I want to have the best life
  • 00:26:07
    and if I want to say let's live like a
  • 00:26:09
    queen and I want to be treated like a
  • 00:26:11
    queen I can have that and who is anyone
  • 00:26:15
    to say that I don't deserve that lots of
  • 00:26:18
    people have it it exists in this world
  • 00:26:20
    whatever exists I can have as well start
  • 00:26:23
    to say that to yourself when you're like
  • 00:26:25
    you know I want to be the most confident
  • 00:26:27
    beautiful amazing smart person that I am
  • 00:26:32
    that's it that's how fast life will
  • 00:26:34
    change for you because you decided that
  • 00:26:35
    for yourself that's who you want to be
  • 00:26:37
    and that's who you already are so you
  • 00:26:39
    start unlocking that version of you if
  • 00:26:41
    you listen to no you shouldn't be living
  • 00:26:43
    like that no you shouldn't have this no
  • 00:26:44
    you shouldn't when you listen to that it
  • 00:26:46
    will Cloud your mind it will start to be
  • 00:26:49
    like oh my God no they told me I was not
  • 00:26:52
    deserving of a good life so now I won't
  • 00:26:54
    have a good life but what are you a
  • 00:26:56
    slave what are you a SL slave to these
  • 00:26:58
    people no really start thinking to
  • 00:27:01
    yourself am I a slave or am I a free
  • 00:27:03
    spirit am I a free soul that came to
  • 00:27:06
    this earth to live my best life possible
  • 00:27:08
    and to help and create in this earth the
  • 00:27:11
    best way possible really one thing in
  • 00:27:14
    life that I've always valued because I
  • 00:27:16
    didn't have it was freedom and I'll be
  • 00:27:19
    damned if someone ever takes that away
  • 00:27:23
    from me again anyways guys I hope you
  • 00:27:26
    enjoyed this video I hope you learned
  • 00:27:27
    something from the this video and yeah I
  • 00:27:29
    see you in the next video bye-bye love
  • 00:27:31
    you
Etiquetas
  • Self-discovery
  • Confidence
  • Therapy
  • Personal growth
  • Self-perception
  • Boundaries
  • Non-negotiables
  • Dopamine
  • Triggers
  • Self-belief